Let's play some games with Leon, Luna, and Eddy

by Fireheart 1945

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 1)

Leon sat down, turned on his computer, and waited for his friends to join their channel. Once they did, he joined a game he was very excited about playing, and had been excited to play for weeks.

"Well, mates, this is it," Eddy announced over the headset.

"Yeah," Leon replied. "Vicky 2."

"Technically it's 'Victoria 2,'" Luna interrupted.

"Really? Are we going to start out arguing over the name?" Leon asked, a little frustrated.

"If we could see one another on camera, Leon, you'd know I was joking."

"Ahhh." As he was contemplating that, the screen lit up with the map of the world, and all the nations on the face of the planet in 1836. "Well, I call dibs on Texas."

"Figures," Eddy said disdainfully," You always did like the underdogs."

"And the fact that I have a massive bonus for immigration has nothing to do with it?"

"If you even get to use it. Mexico'll squish you like a bug, mate."

"Whatever. I still choose Texas."

"Fine. Your loss, man."

"Well who are you playing as, Ed?"

"I'm playing as Denmark or Dai Viet; probably Denmark. What about you, Princess?"

"I shall play as the unstoppable juggernaut known as Cathay!"

"What?"

"She means China," Leon translated. "Cathay is an archaic name for China."

"How am I supposed to know that? I'm not a history-loving egghead, Frenchie."

Leon didn't say what he was thinking out loud. Instead, he simply said, "We still have a couple of people to wait for."

"Um, hello? Is this thing working?" came a very shy, quiet voice. "Sorry if I was too loud."

Oh. "Is that who I think it is?"

"Yes. We... er, I, invited Fluttershy to play," Luna answered, "she has been giving me much counseling when I have felt... alone."

"Well, you definitely are not alone right now," Leon remarked.

"I know," the Princess said in a joyful and grateful voice.

"Who is the other bloke that's coming?" Ed asked.

"Leeroy Jenkins."

"WHAT!"

"HUH?"

"Just kidding," Luna giggled. "That would have been great, but I was unfortunately unable to contact him."

"Well, who is coming?"

"Just a certain Captain of the Royal Guard."

"Oh wow, really?"

"Yes, really."

"Hold on, isn't he Prince of the Crystal Empire? How is he still Captain of the Royal Guard?"

"Well, actually," Luna began, sounding unsure of how to continue, "It's one of those strange political situations. He does help Princess Cadence rule the Empire, but he still leads the Royal Guard. The Empire's independence itself is still being debated, considering that it's current rulers are both of a foreign dynasty."

"That must come up every now and again..."

"Can we just start the damn game?" Eddy interrupted.

"Well excuuuuuusssse me," Leon and Luna both replied. "Just trying to hold a conversation." Leon added.

"Just hold on, he's signing on right now," Luna put in.

"Hey everypony, what's up?" came the Prince's voice.

"Not much, and two of us aren't ponies," Leon deadpanned.

He got a laugh in return. "So who's playing what?"

"I'm playing as Texas, Luna's going for China, and Eddy's Denmark."

"That's cool. I'll go for Japan."

Fluttershy said quietly, "Um, I guess I'll play as Hawaii."

Leon pulled back a little in surprise. Eddy was the only one rude enough to snicker out loud, but he at least had the grace to turn off his mic in the middle of it.

"What's wrong?"

"Uh, Hawaii is an island nation, one without a strong army or all that many resources."

"Oh, that's okay. I'm not out to conquer the world. I just want to have fun."

Leon wondered how that would be possible, but he decided it wasn't his worry. If someone wanted to waste their time on a country that would never become anything, they could. In the meantime, he would do his best to withstand Mexico.

"Okay, is everyone ready?" Luna asked; she was the host for the game, and as thus had control over when the game would start, as well as the game speed once it had started. When she had gotten affirmative replies from everyone involved, she added, "Okay, starting... now!"

The image on the monitor changed to a loading screen; it took a little while to load, and then, finally, the game map came up.

Okay, let's see... I start out at war with Mexico, I have the worst economy I can imagine, and I have a tiny army. That last wasn't going to be the problem; from previous playthroughs, he knew that Sam Houston was the best defensive general that the game produced. The real trouble was in keeping the Texan army supplied, and getting the U.S. the join the war on his side.

"Hey, does anyone want an alliance?" he asked.

"Nah, sorry mate, I'm too far away and my army is terrible," Eddy responded unhelpfully.

"I'm uncivilized."

"So am I."

"I'm so sorry, but I just don't have the resources to help you, Leon."

"Da...arn it." He was on his own.

Leon did what he could. He made sure the taxes and tariffs were as high as he could set them, set the national stockpile to somewhere it would hopefully help him, and he ordered his army to move to Laredo; acting aggressive early might help him earn just enough war score to add "Acquire Mexican Texas" to the war goals he had, which was currently just to gain independence. He also began researching muzzle-loading rifles. He felt the urge to sing come upon him.

"Indian scouts with squirrel guns

Men with muzzleloaders

Stood together, heel and toe

To defend the Alamo."*

"Cut it out, Leo," Eddy said loudly after the former had burst into song.

"Sor-ree," Leon snapped back. When I get done with Mexico, you're next.

"Is everyone ready for the time to start going?" Luna asked. "Speed one?"

The answers were all affirmative. One the screen, the date started moving.

He got an event at once that informed him that Texas had acquired small arms, artillery, and money captured from Mexican garrisons. Leon watched as two Mexican armies entered his land and began immediately besieging territories. His own army arrived in Laredo and started doing the same.

So far, things were going as he had expected. What was not expected was the smaller of the two Mexican armies suddenly pealing off it's siege and start heading for his army.

Oh, Houston, I hope you know what you're doing.

The enemy army slammed into his and began the battle. Luckily, it looked like the Texan army was well supplied, and that Houston actually knew his business; the Mexican army started taking massive casualties at once. The suffered badly throughout the entire battle, and when it was over the Texan army was the one that still held it's ground. The battered Mexican army pulled back, morale shattered. Leon briefly considered following it in order to ensure it's destruction, then decided against it; Houston was a master of defense, but his bonus there didn't extend to offensive combat. The enemy army withdrew into Mexico.

The army lead by Santa Anna captured Antonio, but Leon's own army captured Laredo a few days later, so it wasn't a big loss. The Mexicans began heading for the city of Austin, the Texan capital.

"Hey Leon," Eddy asked, "how's the war going?"

"It's going well, no thanks to you."

"Oh, come on, mate, don't be like that."

"You don't have the entire military of Mexico to deal with."

"Yeah, but I do have to worry about what Prussia's going to do; they get insanely powerful as the game goes on."

"They aren't at war with you right now."

"True, but who knows how long that'll last?"

Deciding to give up on the idea of an alliance, Leon turned back to the war. His army had gone after the remaining region of Mexican Texas and was busily besieging it. The Mexican army he had beaten was currently reinforcing, while Austin was still under siege. Before long, the territory he was besieging fell, and he sent his army up north again. Now all he needed to do was wait for the U.S. to join before adding the war goal; if he did it now, the U.S. couldn't join the war, and he'd almost certainly lose.

Austin fell, and within thirty seconds (about ten or fifteen days or so in-game time) the U.S. declared war on Mexico. Leon instant went to his politics page and added the goal to take Mexican Texas.

Before long, American armies had begun to roll into Mexico, attacking Mexican forces and besieging provinces. Leon sent his own army to retake Austin; Santa Anna had left to fight an American army (and was currently losing).

Luna commented, "Looks like you'll have your independence soon enough, Leon."

"Thanks. Once the U.S. joins, it's easy enough."

In the game, a private message sent by Luna added, "What do you intend to do next?"

"Colonize Oklahoma," he replied in the same fashion.

"So soon?"

"Yes, I need to get it before the U.S. does. Otherwise I'll have to do something like capture Haiti, and they're protected by the U.S. most of thee time." After read what he had typed, he added, "lol *the."

"LOL."

In the meantime, Mexico decided it couldn't take anymore and gave in the U.S. peace offer, which gave Texas it's independence and gave him Mexican Texas. With that under his belt, he could breathe easy.

"Oh wow, you actually won," Eddy said with some surprise.

"Well, more accurately, the U.S.A. won, but details, details." With that, Leon clicked on Oklahoma and set a priority to colonize there. He split off his cavalry unit (named "Travis' Command") to one of the regions there, as it would help the colony finish faster.

"YES! WE HAVE SHATTERED KOREA!"

Leon grabbed at his ears, while protests began singing out over the headset.

"Oops, sorry," Luna apologized.

Leon moved the camera so that it focused on Korea; all of the northern states there had indeed been conquered by Luna's China.

"Uh, Princess?"

"Yes?"

"You do realize that your infamy level is probably through the roof right now, right?"

"Oh, so that's why Russia won't accept my offer for an alliance. That... was unexpected."

"I'll accept it," Shining Armor said. "Just agree to let me have the other half of Korea."

"Done," Luna replied at once. Within moments, Japan had declared war on Korea.

Leon sent a message to Luna; "I'll take an alliance if you want to give it to me."

"Yes," came the reply, "though I'm not sure how you'll be able to get over here in the event of a war."

"Simple," Leon typed, "beat up Mexico some more." A few seconds later, he got the alliance offer from China, which he accepted immediately.

"Hey," Shining typed, "want an alliance from me?"

"Yep." When he got the offer from Japan, he accepted it without a blink.

"Hey, mate, I can see what you're doing," Eddy injected.

"Well," Leon said, hitting the button to justify a war on Denmark as he did so, "it's good to make alliances. You never know when you'll need them," he finished, clicking on the "acquire state" casus belli.

"Well, I have Prussia, Britain, and France to worry 'bout... oh, and Sweden, they want to conquer the hell out of me."

"Well, good luck there."

"Uh, guys," Fluttershy quipped quietly, "I just got put in the U.S.A.s' sphere of influence. What does that mean?"

"They'll be asking you for an alliance," Luna answered, "and they'll protect you from other powers that might seek to declare war on you. It will make westernizing easier, I think, but it will set you back in so far as becoming a Great Power or anything like that."

"Can I leave their sphere?"

"Yes," Leon answered, "but that's going to be hard; you'll need a rebellion of reactionaries, I think, and they'll set back every political reform you made. The only thing that would really work is if someone like the U.K. or France started influencing you."

"Oh, well, uh, ok, I guess I'll just have to grin and bear it then."

In the meantime, Leon did what he could to get a bigger and better army; he decided to skimp out on the navy for now and focus on infantry and artillery, although he was willing to throw in a few cavalry as well. For that, though, he needed to encourage soldiers in Texas, and for that he needed a much bigger population. Luckily, as an American nation, he was getting immigrants at an insane rate whenever he encouraged immigration, so that part wasn't the problem. The trouble was the fact that he currently had only one national focus, which was being used to colonize Oklahoma.

Oklahoma didn't take all that long to finish, though, and before long it was a colony under the Texan banner; for some reason there had been no competition from the U.S., so he guessed that they were busy colonizing somewhere else, probably Africa. After that, he encouraged immigration in Texas proper. He began recruiting an infantry unit in Austin, which would bring his army to the grand maximum of four brigades. That fortunately didn't take too long, though it did strain his minuscule economy, or what passed for it.

As for what was actually news in the rest of the world, various German states began declaring bankruptcy, Britain started killing anything in India that was not under their direct domain, and Greece kept starting crises in order to liberate territory from the Ottoman Empire. After Shining Armor annexed Korea, a Korean independence movement kept trying to start a crisis there, but each time the world just chose to ignore it.

"What the hell mate?" Eddy shouted; Leon's casus belli on him had just finished.

"That's what you get for hating on my singing; now you have to be nice to me."

"Really? Really? I tell you to knock it off for the sake of everyone and you go and make a casus belli against me?"

"Yes, really."

"Oh, come on..."

While Eddy was raging at the world (he turned of his mic at some point as he was talking; apparently he was swearing and cursing everyone), Leon fashioned another casus belli on Mexico. Now that he had had time to think on it, a casus belli on Denmark wasn't the smartest idea he'd ever had. Another war with Mexico was a much better idea. He was aiming for New Mexico and Arizona this time around, and he wanted to take California after that if it was possible, giving him a direct line to the Pacific Ocean. Nevada-Utah was too much to hope for; the U.S. would certainly seize that very soon, not to mention the Deseret Nationalists that loved to rebel there. All in all, it would give him a modest amount of territory, population, and an ability to conquer and colonize from two coasts. If the U.S. took California before he could get at it, he'd go for Baja California.

"Come on, come on, just a few more weeks..."

"Ah!" Luna said with surprise, "it's almost time for me to raise the moon. I'm afraid I have to call this session to a close."

"Aw, nuts," Leon muttered.

"Ah, well, at least we had a good time," Shining Armor said cheerfully.

"I agree; I learned so much," Fluttershy added. "I at least managed to westernize partially. And I have some animal friends to care for anyway."

"Good game so far chaps, same time next week?"

Everyone answered affirmatively. With that, they saved the game and left one by one. As he got off his computer and stretched, Leon couldn't wait until the next session.

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*Note, these lyrics are from Marty Robbins' Ballad of the Alamo.

Comments

[Sherman FireFly]

NOOOOOOO WHY DID YOU TAKE MY KOREA? If you couldn't tell... i'm Korean

[Fireheart 1945]

3241665

Sorry man. For one thing, Korea is a big target of Chinese and Japanese players. For another, any country invaded in this chapter would have ended up troubling someone.

Don't get me wrong, I certainly admire much of the things Koreans stand for; education and duty to family are important aspects in life. I apologize if this has caused a divide between us.

[Sherman FireFly]

3241867 Oh okay well as long as you aren't one of those people who think all Koreans are Communists and stuff like that.

[Fireheart 1945]

3242071

Nah. Koreans in general are okay.

[shadowless_night]

3242071
As a Starcraft HoTS player, you scare the hell outa me
I have only ever beaten a Korean in that game, once. And that was because of bad luck and lag on his part.
Any other time and im usually dead in about 15 minutes of the game starting if im lucky

[BestinDworld]

3242111 have you thought of doing a victoria 2 crossover fic based on the equestira mod? it is a thing mint20 is still doing hers but its mostly in the introduction state even though she made more than five chapters so shes very slow at it