Wallflower sat in front of her house in her undies. In one hand was a bottle of water from which she drank like mother's milk, and in the other she held a toilet cleaner with which she poked ceremonial fires of burning nylon.
A makeshift wooden wagon stopped before her.
She looked up. “Oh, it’s you guys again. Where are my million dollars?”
“As per contract, you get a thousand dollars at the end of every month for the next 83 years and 3 months.“
“Right…”
“And as per contract, we get to equip your house with new electronic devices.”
“More free stuff for me?”
“In a sense…” one answered.
“There is a caveat, though,” the other said.
“You have to put these on.” The first one handed her a box filled with pantyhoses.
“Oh, for the heck's sake, not this again…” Wallflower squeezed her fists. “Never again!”
“Your written consensus overrides your verbal lack of consensus.” One of them waved with a signed contract.
“And if you break the contract,” the second one added, “you’re the one giving us a million dollars.”
“...that I don’t have.” Wallflower sighed.
“This house you inherited is a good start.” The first one caressed the doorframe with a palm.
She stood up and pressed her hands to the hips that were still hurting in the skin canals left by pantyhoses’ rubber bands. “Can I see that contract again?”
“Here’s a copy.” The other one handed it to her.
At first glance, it seemed like an empty sheet of gray paper, but as she studied it closer, she noticed that it consisted of thin, black lines.
Some people like to add small print to the contract, we do things differently. We write whole contracts in small print.
“So, I just have to do this thing now and I’m the one who gets the million dollars?”
“Sort of…” They both said in unison.
She grabbed the box and walked to the restroom. “Just for the record, I hate you!”
I have yet to decide if this is a parody tale or just a comedy played somewhat straight.
I'll get back to you on that.
11732622 It's a parody. In EG, every other girl wears pantyhose because they're easier to animate. It's never explained in canon, though. This fic gives a parody explanation for why EG wear tight clothes most of the time.
Hm... I think last chapters comment was worse than this?
She should have signed with a fake name.
I am certain that she will make the perverts on the Internet very happy.
11782646 She should have signed as 'Sunset Shimmer'.
11819848 And Flim Flam brothers will be happy as well. In a sense, everyone will be happy except for Wall Flower.