"Y-yeah." He took off his hat and laid it down on the bed. "I have been... kind of a dick to you. When we first met, and when I first woke up. I just don't know how this place works, and I was pretty stressed out. I really didn't mean to act that way towards you, you have been really nice... No! You have been more than nice, and I was such an asshole!... I'm just... I'm just really sorry Twilight." He put one of his elbows on his knee and rested his face into his palm.
I don't see how he was that much of a dick during their first meeting to be honest. I get here being called a horse is an insult for some stupid reason the fic hasn't bothered to explain yet, so he shouldn't know or even think he was being rude other than he simply referred to her as a wrong species which in itself isn't that big of a deal. During their second meeting, yes, but he was only a dick after she was one first. Sure, have him apologize for that but he was only responding to Twilight doing so. For the so-called princess of Friendship Twilight doesn't understand the golden rule, treat others how she wants to be treated. By insulting his name first she asked for him to simply return the favor and insult hers. I feel they are both equally in the wrong and she should apologize too. Unless, being called a horse here is something truly despicable, but until the fic explains why that is, assuming it does at some point in the future, I am simply left thinking the fic is treating his understandable behavior as worse than it actually was and ignoring that Twilight was acting the same way.
11497128 Thank you for your comment! I would be more than willing to explain my reasonings. First off I know I haven't really explained my reason why being called a horse is a big deal, that is because since this is a story driven clopfic, I'm going to have a lot of interactions between Twilight and Derek. Especially in the next chapter where they are going to be asking each other a bunch of questions. That question will be brought up as I am going through a progressive world build, where everything is explained the farther into the story we go. I got a lot of plans while doing this that I don't want to spoil so I will keep quiet on that for now.
I see your reasoning for wanting Twilight to apologize as well, and thinking Derek doesn't really need to, but this was my way of seeing it. Her mispronunciation of Derek's name was simply a misunderstanding, while Derek just insulted her right to her face about hers. She implied that she has never heard a name like that before, while Derek has heard of the word "Twilight" and "Sparkle" because in his world, they are real words. And putting them together into a name was outlandish to him. Again in this chapter, when he heard her friend's names, he thought they were "Fitting" because they are words he recognizes. Human names are going to be completely foreign to them.
Finally, another reason I made him apologize is mainly from their second interaction. Derek was pretty hostile to Twilight, he was angry, he yelled at her, his attitude portrayed a lot of hostile emotions. And yes, I know that would be a pretty normal reaction to someone who was haphazardly pulled out of their world and into a new one. Shit I would prolly react the same way. But after Twilight's continued kindness and generosity and willingness to help him, it would make anyone feel bad for lashing out at someone like that. Even though his feelings were justified, it boiled down to self guilt by how much he pushed his anger towards someone who wanted to help him. I hope my explanations were satisfying. I hope you stick around for more chapters!
11497346 Sure, I guess I can understand all that. The thing that really annoyed me was Twilight a few times, without one shred of self awareness, noting he's a bit rude, while ignoring the circumstances and not acknowledging she was the same way. She just came across as holier than thou and self-righteous. I still feel she should be called out on that or realized that she wasn't as innocent as she and the fic is acting like she was, but fine, I will drop it and see what happens.
11497354 Hope you don't feel like I'm brushing off your criticism! If it's how you feel I definitely take it into consideration. I'll take any view point I can get to develop more of the story to people's liking!
I don't see how he was that much of a dick during their first meeting to be honest. I get here being called a horse is an insult for some stupid reason the fic hasn't bothered to explain yet, so he shouldn't know or even think he was being rude other than he simply referred to her as a wrong species which in itself isn't that big of a deal. During their second meeting, yes, but he was only a dick after she was one first. Sure, have him apologize for that but he was only responding to Twilight doing so. For the so-called princess of Friendship Twilight doesn't understand the golden rule, treat others how she wants to be treated. By insulting his name first she asked for him to simply return the favor and insult hers. I feel they are both equally in the wrong and she should apologize too. Unless, being called a horse here is something truly despicable, but until the fic explains why that is, assuming it does at some point in the future, I am simply left thinking the fic is treating his understandable behavior as worse than it actually was and ignoring that Twilight was acting the same way.
Well, this story is off to a pretty good start. I can't wait to see what else this has to offer and show.
11497128
I thought twilight calling him dare-wreck was because she wasn't used to human names and it didn't roll off the tongue very well lol
11497167
Sure, but that excuse and justification also applies to him, so again they are both equally in the wrong.
nice story
11497128
Thank you for your comment! I would be more than willing to explain my reasonings. First off I know I haven't really explained my reason why being called a horse is a big deal, that is because since this is a story driven clopfic, I'm going to have a lot of interactions between Twilight and Derek. Especially in the next chapter where they are going to be asking each other a bunch of questions. That question will be brought up as I am going through a progressive world build, where everything is explained the farther into the story we go. I got a lot of plans while doing this that I don't want to spoil so I will keep quiet on that for now.
I see your reasoning for wanting Twilight to apologize as well, and thinking Derek doesn't really need to, but this was my way of seeing it. Her mispronunciation of Derek's name was simply a misunderstanding, while Derek just insulted her right to her face about hers. She implied that she has never heard a name like that before, while Derek has heard of the word "Twilight" and "Sparkle" because in his world, they are real words. And putting them together into a name was outlandish to him. Again in this chapter, when he heard her friend's names, he thought they were "Fitting" because they are words he recognizes. Human names are going to be completely foreign to them.
Finally, another reason I made him apologize is mainly from their second interaction. Derek was pretty hostile to Twilight, he was angry, he yelled at her, his attitude portrayed a lot of hostile emotions. And yes, I know that would be a pretty normal reaction to someone who was haphazardly pulled out of their world and into a new one. Shit I would prolly react the same way. But after Twilight's continued kindness and generosity and willingness to help him, it would make anyone feel bad for lashing out at someone like that. Even though his feelings were justified, it boiled down to self guilt by how much he pushed his anger towards someone who wanted to help him. I hope my explanations were satisfying. I hope you stick around for more chapters!
11497346
Sure, I guess I can understand all that. The thing that really annoyed me was Twilight a few times, without one shred of self awareness, noting he's a bit rude, while ignoring the circumstances and not acknowledging she was the same way. She just came across as holier than thou and self-righteous. I still feel she should be called out on that or realized that she wasn't as innocent as she and the fic is acting like she was, but fine, I will drop it and see what happens.
11497354
Hope you don't feel like I'm brushing off your criticism! If it's how you feel I definitely take it into consideration. I'll take any view point I can get to develop more of the story to people's liking!
More good
So no equestria girls in this universe? Just to make sure.
11717679
correct
A tribe 200x years prior, now extinct?
G1 had humans and is at least as old if not older than Equestria which was formed no earlier than Luna’s banishment 1k years prior.
Unless, G1 isn’t associated with this Equestria? And that tribe is related in a different way or totally unrelated to either?
Interesting little mystery here.
Pointless background