Rarity's Generosity

by Incredible_E

3 - The Smack-Down

Oh no no, no! The group simultaneously thinks to themselves while witnessing the Ursa Major moving back towards Ponyville.

”Why is it so determined to destroy Ponyville? What happened to make it think we did anything?” Rainbow Dash asks.

Twilight responds, ”I don’t know, but it needs to stay here. It is not realistic that we can wear it down alone. I need to get help, more reinforcements.”

”The unicorns from Ponyville simply won't come back after being scared off the first time,” Rarity adds.

Twilight comes up with a plan. ”Canterlot! I'll teleport to Canterlot and ask Celestia if we can assemble a team to exhaust the Ursa Major faster. First things first, we need to stop and distract it ourselves. I know you will all do a great job keeping the Ursa Major distracted. Do whatever it takes to keep it here. Rainbow, Applejack, Rarity, you should focus on the beast."

Rainbow Dash salutes, "Yes ma'am!"

"Will do," Applejack agrees.

"Absolutely!" Rarity says elegantly.

"Fluttershy, you should try and find out what could have possibly made the Ursa Major act this way."

"Mhm!" Fluttershy nods softly.

"Pinkie," Twilight pauses for dramatic effect. "You do you," she winks at Pinkie Pie. "Okie dokie lokie!" Pinkie concurs.

Twilight raises her hoof toward the group. Rarity is the first to join in, then everypony else enthusiastically follows along for an epic hoof bump.

Twilight disengages the cloak bubble and teleports them all just behind the speed-walking Ursa Major. Quickly, Rarity and Twilight fire a combined laser pulse to get the Major's attention. It works since the beast quits going north, screeching to a halt. It turns around and faces the six ponies that stand before the large cosmic purple bear.

"Alright, Twilight, we got this from here. Go get the royal guards," Rainbow Dash says, ready to continue forward with the plan.

Twilight responds, "I will be back as fast as I can," POOF! Twilight teleports away to Canterlot.

In the meantime, Fluttershy has gone a little bit into the forest to talk to the woodland creatures. She is trying to see if any rumors have spread about why the Ursa Major could be upset. So far, no luck. The woodland creatures she has spoken to have no gossip to tell.

"Well, could you spread the word to everycreature to be on the lookout for a reason why the Ursa Major could be upset?" Fluttershy says to a bird that recently said it had no idea about the Ursa Major. "Please include where I am, so if anycreature does know, they can come and tell me. The quicker the better, I do not want this fight to go on any longer than it has to..." The bird chirps as if it is happy to help, then flies off. It chirps as it flies, doing as Fluttershy kindly asked of it. Fluttershy gets closer to the scene, but still back far enough as to still get news if any creature comes to her. She is also waiting nearby in case the Ursa Major is all of a sudden ready to communicate what the problem is.

Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie are busy distracting the beast while Twilight is away. Rainbow Dash flies around it, landing a kick here and there, not only to distract it from moving to Ponyville, but from the other three below. Applejack rear kicks it harder than she kicks apple trees during the harvest season. Rarity continues to fire at the ruffian with a constant pulse.

Pinkie Pie keeps fishing around in her mane for something. Mmm-no, she says to herself in her head as she pulls out an item she was not looking for. The bouncy ball rolls away as it became a rejected item. No, not that, a rocking chair lands on the ground behind her. Oh, come on! That is a snack for later, she lays the tray of cupcakes next to her. Tired of blindly searching for her item, she takes the front of her mane and sticks her face in it.

Rarity, who is next to her, and Rainbow Dash, who can see this while flying around the beast, glance at Pinkie Pie. They both sigh and roll their eyes as Pinkie is being Pinkie.

As Rainbow Dash glances away for a split second, the Ursa Major sees its chance. It swings its enormous paw to knock Rainbow Dash out of the sky. As the swing gets closer, she notices and braces for impact. Snap! The paw freezes in place right in front of Rainbow.

"Well, don't just fly there! Move!" Applejack says impatiently with a mouth full of rope. Applejack had noticed the Ursa Major's move when Rainbow Dash let down her guard, so she pulled out her lasso and roped the Major mid-swipe.

"Thanks, AJ," Rainbow Dash responds while flying out of danger. She is grateful and also a little ashamed, realizing she let her guard down in the first place.

Applejack's hold on the Ursa Major's leg does not last long once the Major notices it has been stopped. The Major tugs up on the rope, forcing Applejack to let go. She is standing on excess rope that was not needed to lasso the attacking beast. The unused line grabs her hind leg as the Ursa Major continues to raise its paw. Applejack is now caught by it and dangles above the ground at unsafe heights.

The rope's strength begins to fail, buckling with Applejack on the other end. Rainbow Dash is too busy with the beast, her distraction keeping Pinkie Pie and Rarity safe. Rarity is on the other side and does not see what is happening. Pinkie Pie is blinded by stuffing her face in her mane, leaving her oblivious.

Applejack refuses to call for help, determined to fix things independently. She tries to sit up and untie herself but keeps getting swung around. Getting nauseated, and against her will, Applejack finally surrenders her pride and shouts for help. "Somepony help me down from this here rope!"

"I can't!" Rainbow Dash excuses herself. "The only reason this bear hasn't swiped at you yet is because of my distractions!"

The rope begins to tear, time is running out on its durability. Snap! The twine breaks and sends Applejack into a brutal fall back to the ground far beneath her.

Gravity takes hold of Applejack as she accelerates to the earth. "I got you!" Fluttershy says quickly, as she swoops in to catch Applejack.

They both crash land, unearthing once dormant dirt behind them as they slow down. Fluttershy is not used to holding anything more than a few rabbits, so holding an entire pony was simply too much for her.

Rainbow Dash observes the area. Applejack and Fluttershy are dusting themselves off after a crash-landing rescue. Pinkie Pie is lost in her mane with a mountain of random objects behind her. Rarity is on the other side helping Rainbow Dash keep the Major at bay. This isn't going to work, thinks Rainbow Dash. She decides they need a new plan. We need something big to hap--WOAH! She dodges another close one from the Ursa Major. Suddenly, Rainbow Dash perks up and her eyes widen with the formation of a brilliant idea.

"Guys!" she shouts, about to announce her new vision. "We need to knock this bear out cold if we are going to really win this thing. So--

Fluttershy interjects, hoping for an alternative. "Oh. Uh. Do we have to... ?"

"Yes!" Rainbow Dash squeaks in response. "I'm going to take this bear out with a sonic rainboom," she says confidently while dodging another swipe from the Major.

"You reckon that's safe with all of us bein' this close 'n all?" Applejack asks with concern.

"Oh pfff, of course it's safe! Rarity can make a magical shield thingy to block the wind."

"I can certainly do that if that's the plan," Rarity says confidently.

"Alright everypony, get behind Rarity. It's about to get a little drafty over here."

Rainbow Dash zooms away with a faint rainbow trail following her into the horizon. The rest of the girls walk to Rarity for protection against the incoming sonic rainboom. Since the Ursa Major is no longer being distracted, the remaining four back up, leaving space between them. It still moves towards them, seeing that the annoying rainbow pony flew away. Rainbow Dash seems to be taking her sweet time, anxiety takes over the girls.

The anxious feeling did not last long, quickly being replaced with courage as a blue speck became visible in the distance. Rarity produces a magical teal shield and braces to block severe winds.

vvvrrrrroooooooooOOOOOO--BOOMMMmmmm

Rainbow Dash times it perfectly and produces a sonic rainboom right next to the Ursa Major. She zooms by, only appearing as a streak of blue followed by a near-solid colored rainbow. Rarity blocks the hurricane-like winds that appeared immediately after Rainbow Dash passed, as well as items from Pinkie's mountain of mane objects. It is hard for Rarity to keep the shield up, the winds are strong, and it shows as she puts all her might into it. She audibly grunts as the sheer power of it shows no mercy. She and the shield are being pushed backward by the windy force, leaving four lines of dirt in the ground from Rarity’s hooves.

The Ursa Major sways to each side and attempts to restabilize but collapses to the ground instead. The girls lose their own balance for a moment as the ground rumbles from the Major's fall.

Rainbow Dash loops around and lands next to Rarity. They high-hoof for a job well done.

Fluttershy goes to the beast and sits, petting its head. Applejack trots to the Major's legs and lassoes them together with a nice tight knot.

Leaning on the bonded paws, Applejack celebrates. "Yeehaw! We did it! But uhh... now what do we do with it?"

"Now we wait for Twilight and the royal guards of course. They should not be too much longer," Rarity says to Applejack, ready for this battle to end so she can relax once again.

Fluttershy questions tying up the Ursa Major. "Is that really necessary Applejack?"

"That's like asking if apples grow on trees, of course it is sugar cube. This thing could wake up and cause a ruckus again."

Suddenly, the Major's eyes open and look at Fluttershy. "Oh! Hello mister."

The Major tries to move its legs the moment consciousness returns. It finds itself tied up and begins to change attitudes. The calm awakening bear becomes frantic and panics. Fluttershy's calm words of consolation are drowned out by its roar of distress. Rarity uses her magic to pull Applejack away from the paws she was just leaning on. Fluttershy remains near its head to try and calm it down. The rope gives up and frees the Ursa Major from bondage.

"Ah hah! I finally found it!" Pinkie Pie exclaims excitedly as she sets her party cannon down. "Fluttershy! Get out of there!" she says while looking up at the beast.

Fluttershy does not see that the lasso has broken, meaning the Major can strike once again. Pinkie hastily gallops to Fluttershy while rolling the party cannon. A paw is coming towards them. Rainbow Dash cannot do anything about it, Applejack is out of rope, and Rarity is still using her magic.

Pop, goes the party cannon, releasing multi-colored confetti at the beast's face. The confetti fazes the bear for a split second, enough time for Pinkie Pie to push Fluttershy out of harm's way. The paw is only delayed for a moment. The strike resumes right after the party cannon's attack. It smacks Pinkie and flings her into the tree line nearby, a tree suddenly halts her trajectory.

"Pinkie! No! Oh my Celestia are you okay?" she flies to Pinkie to care for her. Fluttershy finds Pinkie to be knocked out. The Major fully recollects itself and stands up.

Rainbow Dash becomes infuriated that the sonic rainboom only worked for such an insignificant amount of time. Now additionally with Pinkie Pie being hurt, she has had enough.

"That. Is. It! Twilight will be here soon with help, but not soon enough to stop me from making you regret hurting Pinkie!” Rainbow Dash shouts towards the beast, full of rage.

She speeds away and loops around to fly at the Ursa Major with maximum speed. Soon after, the beast is surrounded by rainbows looping all around it. A small rainbow tornado forms around the Major. The tornado would be more effective at making the bear dizzy if it were not standing on all four legs.

Applejack gets an idea to help Rainbow Dash daze the beast.

"Rarity, could you kindly take the rope over there and tie it into one long piece? I am going to get this beast on its hind legs."

"Certainly darling. No pony else is getting hurt if I can help it!" Rarity bravely claims, glancing over at Pinkie, who has thankfully regained consciousness.

Rarity's teal aura takes over the broken pieces of the rope that once held the Major's legs tight together. She ties the twine together to make one long strand. As the last knot is tightened, Rarity hovers it over to Applejack.

”Thank you kindly Rarity.”

”Of course, Applejack.”

Applejack approaches the Major with the new twine. She swings her head and body around as if it were an elegant dance. Even with the slight limp Applejack got since dangling mid-air after her own lasso grabbed her leg, she pushes past the pain to do the job. The rope follows along until Applejack quickly jolts her body and head to the side. It violently whips at the front legs of the beast. Applejack repeats this a few times, then Rarity joins in by lasering the other leg. As the pain gets to the overwhelmed Ursa Major, it begins to stand on its hind legs.

Now that Rarity and Applejack has given the opportunity, Rainbow Dash tightens the tornado and increases her angular speed to the maximum. The Ursa Major is getting tired and dizzy, finally, the day may be over soon.

---

A critter approaches Fluttershy, still tending to Pinkie Pie on the tree line. The same bird she spoke to before has returned with news for Fluttershy. It tells her the reason for the Ursa Major’s outrage was because its cave home had collapsed. The beast thought the ponies did it to finally remove the Major from the area after the first incident.

---

The Ursa Major knows it is now being bested. With frustration and one last bit of concentration, it focuses on Rainbow Dash’s path. The Major observes how long it takes for Rainbow Dash to pass one time. Anticipating where and when Rainbow Dash will be, with all its remaining might, the beast flings its front paw with what remaining strength it can muster.

SLAP! A direct hit on Rainbow Dash.

Once flying around the Ursa Major, she is launched into the air, tangent from where she was hit. A heavy swinging paw making contact with an immensely fast pegasus is not a good combination for the smaller of the pair. Her enormous horizontal speed is almost immediately halted, physically, this should be a lethal incident. As Rainbow Dash was struck, her wings broke, her front legs shattered, and knocked out harder than Pinkie Pie.

Rainbow Dash’s predestined trajectory is unfavorable as it leads into the ravine, almost dry of water. Rarity goes into a full gallop after Rainbow Dash.

Comments

[Normal]

I have read two chapters now! I just need to go write a thorough comment cause I had so many suggestions and comments!

[Jymbroni]

Alright let me try and help you with this major thing that's bugging me. These conversations need to be cleaned up with attribution and proper way of articulating ponies responses for example:

"Pinkie," Twilight pauses for dramatic effect. "You do you," she winks at Pinkie Pie. "Okie dokie lokie!" Pinkie concurs.

A better way to put this would be: "Pinkie!" Twilight commanded as the pinkie mare lowered herself like a cat ready to pounce. "You do you."
Pinkie Pie sprang to her hooves. "Okie dokie lokie!"
A smirk appeared on the corner of her lips as Twilight hoof bumped her friends. "Let's give this Ursa Minor a Ponyville welcome that it will never forget."
With the second version you get more body language making the characters feel more alive. Let me show you another example:

Leaning on the bonded paws, Applejack celebrates. "Yeehaw! We did it! But uhh... now what do we do with it?"

This is a great idea and imagery, but let's make it pop more!
"Yeehaw!" Applejack tossed her stenson into the air after securing the knots around the Ursa Minors paws. "We did it y'all! But..." she trailed off take a couple steps back from the bound creature. "What do we do with it now?"
This adds more to the scene and allows AJ to show off some of her mannerism that we have grown to love in the show.

You have a solid idea with this Ursa Minor fight but it gets lost in the conversation because their not articulated properly. When you're writing dialogue think about what they're saying first, then think about the tone of how they're delivering it (are they flat, happy, sad, bitter, elated) and add onto this delivery with body language. We can interrupt someone's intentions through body language alone so don't be afraid to use that.