Dear Diary...

by Brony4L1fe90

Fragility of the Heart (Entry #4)

Dear Diary,

It’s been several days since I last wrote to you…I’m so sorry! It wasn’t my fault I didn’t write though! Well, not completely anyway…I’ll get to what happened soon, though right now I should start with that day at the spa. It was definitely what I needed to ease some of my stress. Then again, who could resist a trip to the spa, and all of the good it does for your body? Although, our group did fall a little short…more than I had expected anyway.

* * * * *

“Oh…it’s already an hour late, where is everypony?” Rarity whined. It was only her, Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy during that moment, the three awaiting the rest of their group in the lobby of the spa.

“Um…I’m not sure if Rainbow Dash wanted to come…” Fluttershy said quietly. Rainbow Dash was probably the last pony in Equestria who’d ever end up receiving a hooficure, especially after that time when she ended up in a tabloid showing such a thing.

“What about Applejack?” Twilight quickly asked. “Oh, and Pinkie Pie?” she continued with after a second of hesitation.

“I don’t know…Applejack seemed to be doing better when I stopped by her place, so I thought she would have come along by now,” Rarity explained, “although Pinkie Pie said she’d only make it if she wasn’t too busy. Seeing how much business she has had in the past five days or so, I wouldn’t be surprised if she couldn’t make it though. It’s amazing how much business she’s gotten lately!”

“Yeah…” Fluttershy began, “…it’s probably because so many ponies are visiting from Fillydelphia and Las Pegasus lately…”

Twilight suddenly sneezed after Fluttershy finished her explanation. “Oh, excuse me…so, what do we do?” Twilight asked.

“Well we certainly can’t keep these ladies waiting any longer for us. Sadly we will have to go on without them,” Rarity decided. Fluttershy nodded in agreement, as did Twilight even though she wanted to see her friends, especially Applejack. However, after yesterday’s events, she had learned her lesson and figured that it was probably for the best. Trying to push all thoughts of her out of her mind, she followed Fluttershy and Rarity as Lotus Blossom and Aloe, the two spa sisters, led them into the spa.

The hours flew by, as the three ponies enjoyed various pleasures such as massages, horn filing for Rarity and Twilight, and then, of course, a dip into the large bath. Twilight could feel the warmth in the water fill her body, which was definitely the most relaxing feeling she encountered all week. It was amazing what wonders a simple bath could do. Of course she already knew that from her previous experience two days ago. Once that thought entered her mind, she struggled to release it. Thankfully she was distracted from the thought by one of the other ponies as they started a conversation.

“So Twilight, what—“ Rarity started to ask a question, before being interrupted by a sudden sneeze from Twilight.

“Bless you,” Fluttershy said quietly to Twilight.

Twilight wiped her nose with her hoof and thanked her, apologizing to Rarity for the interruption. Rarity smiled and continued. “Twilight, what was it that’s been on your mind? I just know something’s been bothering you and well, now that we’re in the bath, I’m sure you’re feeling relaxed enough to talk to us about it.”

“I don’t know girls, I—“ Twilight couldn’t finish her sentence before letting out another sneeze. Before Fluttershy could let out a polite “bless you” in response, Twilight sneezed once again in succession.

“Oh…my…Twilight…are you okay?” Fluttershy asked.

Twilight tried to response, but felt her nose tickling on the inside, as she raised her nose to try and avoid the feeling. She was unsuccessful though, as she then let out a much louder sneeze. Rarity quickly shifted her body over to Twilight and placed a hoof on her forehead.

“My goodness, Twilight, you’re positively burning up!” she exclaimed.

“No, it’s fine Rarity, I’m oka—“ once again, Twilight was cut off from another sneeze.

“Ew!” Rarity squealed, as Twilight accidentally sneezed in her direction. Rarity sunk her entire body underwater, resurfacing a couple seconds later and scrubbing her body with the water. “Oh, I hope that facial will help clean my face up, I don’t want to get sick too!” Rarity whined with extreme drama, as she tended to do.

“Twilight…what happened yesterday that might have gotten you sick?” Fluttershy asked in the midst of Rarity’s whining.

“Well, Fluttershy…” Twilight began, soon pulling Fluttershy aside while Rarity was busy with scrubbing her face. “I got caught in the rain yesterday…I left my home early morning thinking I’d beat the storm when I wanted to go see somepony, but the storm got much worse before I could make it, so I ended up just returning home, but I was so cold from the rain…I guess my immune system was weak because of it…I must have caught something…”

“Oh my…I’m sorry, Twilight…maybe you should go home and rest?” Fluttershy asked. Twilight nodded and knew it was the best thing she could do, considering it was the same advice she had given to Applejack.

“Ahhh, that should do for now…I’d better just relax though, or I’ll be sure to break out,” Rarity then said from the other side of the bath, then grabbing the sides of the bath with her hooves as she laid against it, relaxing her body in the bath with her head arched back. It was the exact same scene that Twilight experienced when she saw Applejack in that tub, three days ago. It started to bother Twilight so much; no matter where she went, there always seemed to be some sort of sign that would begin replaying every scene she experienced with the orange pony, no matter how much she tried to shut those thoughts out of her mind.

“Actually, you’re right, Fluttershy. I’m just gonna go get some rest,” Twilight said, grabbing a robe and then starting to walk away from the tub. Rarity tried to call for her, but Twilight was way too distracted to even notice as she walked out of the spa.

* * * * *

So…I ended up not sleeping. Since Fluttershy had brought up the idea of me getting some rest, I figured it would make the perfect excuse for me to leave the spa early. Deep down, I was starting to get a little worried about Applejack. If she was feeling better, why didn’t she show up? If she didn’t want to go, she would have told Rarity. It’s impossible for her to lie over even the smallest of things, at least without showing a blatant reaction, whether it involved her snout scrunching up or her pupils shrinking and eyes shifting around.

Once I left the spa, I just wanted to find Applejack and see what was up. I wasn’t going to let my feelings distract me. I wasn’t going to do anything awkward…hopefully not anyway. No, I was just going to go see why she didn’t show, and then return home. That was the plan anyway.

* * * * *

Twilight Sparkle followed the same path she always took to Sweet Apple Acres, keeping her eyes open for the orange pony. Along the way, she continued to sneeze, further confirming how sick she really was. After a lot of walking, though, she began to see stars. Twilight did her best to fight off the slight dizziness she had, completely ignoring everything she learned from the previous day to find her friend.

“Applejack?” Twilight called out for her friend as she approached Sweet Apple Acres. She was still dizzy from the walk, but did her best to look in the distance, across the orchard, in hopes to catch sight of her friend. Her only idea of where Applejack could possibly be was inside, still inside of her bed, even though Rarity was sure she was feeling better.

Twilight walked up to the door of Applejack’s home and raised her hoof to knock on the door, only to see two blurry hooves instead. The two blurs in front of her slowly spread apart from each other, as stars continued to fill up her vision. She did her best to swing her hoof out to knock the door, but once she exerted the needed energy to knock once, Twilight could feel her body topple over to the ground, falling in exhaustion, all of her vision instantly going black.

* * * * *

And that was all I could remember of that day. The next thing I remember was waking up in a bed in the emergency room. Luckily, Big McIntosh was home to carry me over there and was able to seek immediate care for me. Nurse Redheart was really nice, and kept good watch on me, occasionally giving me medicine as well as food and drinks. Rarity and Fluttershy ended up visiting that same night, worried about my health, but when they heard from Big McIntosh that I had passed out in front of his door, Fluttershy got all flustered and upset at me. I tried my best to apologize, but I’m not sure how well she took it. Maybe tomorrow she’ll feel a little better over it all. I wanted to tell them the real reason why I was at his house, but…well, you know that’s what I’ve been stressing so long over!

Although…the next morning was probably one of the hardest mornings I’ve experienced, even more so then that rainy morning I went through. She came. Yes, Applejack. She came by, on her own, to come see me. She sure wasn’t too happy, either…

* * * * *

Twilight had finally awakened while in her emergency room bed. It sure wasn’t as comfortable as Twilight’s bed at home, but at least it was soft enough to get some sleep in. Twilight yawned, and tried to open her eyes as she woke up. She could feel herself experiencing the same symptoms of exhaustion and weakness that her friend, Applejack, did when she was feverish, as Twilight's eyes felt so weak that they could only open at most half-way. Although, speaking of the devil, she stood right in front of her. As Twilight slowly opened her eyes, she could see Applejack standing in front of her bed, with a blank look towards Twilight.

“Oh, hey Applejack,” Twilight greeted her. She wasn’t sure how to react, considering she still had so many feelings running through her mind. Her heart though almost dropped, once she saw Applejack’s eyes lower and her mouth turn into a frown.

“Twiligh’, how could ya?” she asked sternly.

“W-what do you mean?” Twilight tried to ask innocently, acting as if she ended up in the hospital on her own, for no particular reason.

“You know darn well what Ah’m talkin’ about,” she stated as she placed her hoof firmly in the ground. “Ya tried to come find me and ya pass out from exhaustion? Twiligh’, you know better than that! Ah was just startin’ to feel better, when my brother tells me mah good friend Twiligh’ passed out in front of my door? What was so darn important that you put yourself through so much stress?”

“Applejack, I was just—“ Twilight tried to explain, but Applejack continued, interrupting her.

“Ah cain’t believe you, Twiligh’. Not only that, but Ah know exactly how ya got sick!”

“What?” Twilight squealed. “I can’t believe Fluttershy told you that—“

“Fluttershy ain’t told me nothin’!” Applejack yelled, removing her hat and placing a hoof inside of it, pulling out a few strands of purple and pink hair. “Mah sister found THIS in her tree house, mind explainin’ that?”

Twilight felt all of her nerves burn up, her face burning as blood rushed through it, not sure what to say or how to react. “Applejack…I…”

“Those hairs were wet when Ah got them, Twi! You were in the pouring rain, and ya got yourself all under the weather! Ah told ya many times to not be all stressin’ out about me, Ah told ya Ah’d be fine! Yet ya tried to go through a downpour to find me, and now ya blame an innocent pony for me finding out? Ah just cain’t believe ya, Twiligh’, not one bit!”

Tears started to build up in the corners of her eyes because of her friend, who she had so many feelings for, yelling at her. She had already known she went too far, but hadn’t expected things to get this out of hand. There was a few seconds of silence before Applejack finally calmed down a little.

“Ah’m mighty glad you’re being taken care of now, Twi, but Ah just don’t know how to take you trying to put the blame on good ol’ Fluttershy. Ah just…Ah ain’t never thought you’d jump to conclusions that quickly.” Applejack turned her back towards Twilight as she finished her sentence. Twilight’s tears had escaped her eyes, then rolling down her face. She felt so heartbroken at that moment for what she had done; she shouldn’t have been so quick to react from Applejack bringing up the topic of how Twilight got sick.

“I…I’m sorry…” Twilight struggled to let out, her voice shaking as she let out a couple of tears.

Applejack’s ears perked up as she heard the sadness in Twilight’s voice, turning back around to see her wiping the tears off of her face. Applejack then walked up to Twilight’s side, keeping a stern look on her face. “Ah take it ya won’t push yourself like that anymore? And ya won’t be jumpin’ the gun blamin’ other ponies like that?”

All Twilight could do was nod, before fresh tears built up in her eyes, letting out a small sob. Applejack’s voice then lightened up a little, as she took a seat next to Twilight’s bed.

“Ah don’t understand, Twi…why? Why would ya go through so much for me? Ah was just feverish is all, it ain’t like Ah was dying or anythin’ of the sort.”

There it was again, Applejack’s eyes staring into Twilight’s as she asked her question, while every thought of Applejack that Twilight had repressed came back, getting lost in them. She tried to think of an answer that would be believable while not revealing the feelings she had, even though her feelings felt a little shattered after being scolded in such a way.

“Applejack, I just…worried that much. I worry easily…that’s all,” Twilight said hoping to convince Applejack, even if it was the weakest excuse she could possibly think of.

“It doesn’t matter Twi, I worry about ya very much but Ah know mah limits when caring for another pony, and ya cain’t be overworkin’ yourself like that!”

Twilight looked down at her bed sheets in disappointment. At least the excuse was enough to get past the question, she thought, taking her loss before it got worse. Twilight nodded her head gently in agreement. “You’re right Applejack…it was dumb of me to worry as much as I did. I’m sorry.”

Twilight Sparkle just wanted to let out all of her sadness at that moment; her brain processed so many emotions and feelings at once, it was too much to handle. She didn’t know what to think, what to say, how to react, to anything and anypony. She felt so miserable from all of the stress she put herself through, starting to wonder if it was really worth it all.

All of a sudden, while she stared at the sheets on her lap, which were speckled with the tears that dropped from Twilight’s face, Twilight felt something warm on top of her head. When she looked up, she saw a hatless Applejack reaching a hoof over, placing her hat on Twilight’s head.

“Stay strong, Twiligh’,” Applejack said quietly, as she then got up and walked out of the room that Twilight was staying in. The feelings of love and heartbreak surrounded Twilight’s mind way too much to react, but she could feel a sense of comfort with Applejack’s hat on her head.

“Thank you, Applejack…” Twilight Sparkle whispered to herself, as she slid deeper under the covers, wiping her eyes with the sheets.

* * * * *

That whole day I was more stressed out than I was exhausted from the sickness. I didn’t know what to think about Applejack…I mean, yeah, I still had some feelings for her, but…to be honest, I kind of lost hope. You see…when I looked into Applejack’s eyes, all I could feel was nothing but love warming my heart…but when I heard her yell the way she did…all I felt was a knife stabbing into it. Does everypony in love have to deal with this?

She did come back though the next morning. Yesterday, in fact. You see, I was released just this morning once they were sure that my sickness wasn’t anything really serious. Yesterday was the last day I had to spend a full day stuck in bed. If memory serves me right, she came by just before meeting with the other four ponies for a picnic at the park.

* * * * *

Twilight was sucked into one of the hospital’s books, all about organic chemistry. Twilight Sparkle always had interest in various fields of science, so when she asked if there were any reference books available to read, she was pleased to find an assortment of various books related to chemistry among the reference books available.

“Twiligh’?” a voice said, a hoof knocking on the door to her room softly. Twilight Sparkle lowered her book to see Applejack in the doorway.

“Oh…come in.” Twilight still was unsure how to react to Applejack, still a bit shaken over yesterday.

“Ah think mah hat looks mighty nice on ya,” Applejack commented with a giggle. Twilight placed a hoof on her head to feel Applejack’s hat; she had forgotten she went to sleep with it on last night. “Anyway, Ah just wanted to stop by for a few minutes before meeting with everypony else for lunch. How ya holdin’ up?”

As she continued to feel the hat, she soon felt something odd about the hat. Suddenly, as she was feeling the back part of the hat, she could soon feel her mane, yet the sides of her hoof were still touched by the hat. Twilight gasped loudly as her eyes widened.

“Wha? What’s wrong, sugarcube?”

Twilight was so frightened by what she felt, she couldn’t think of any excuse. Twilight did her best to fake a sneeze, as it was all she could do.

“Heh, excuse me. Nothing, I’m fine,” Twilight said innocently with a nervous smile.

“Right, well…Ah just wanted to be sure all was well, Ah’ll just be on my way now, alright?”

Twilight nodded, her hoof still in the same spot on the back of her head. Applejack then walked out of the room to let Twilight be and to meet up with her friends for lunch. Once Twilight was sure that Applejack was gone, she took her hat off to look at the top of it.

“Oh no…this isn’t good…this isn’t good at all,” Twilight said to herself as she breathed harder and quicker in panic, looking at a slice in the back of Applejack’s hat that was long enough for her hoof to slip through. “This wasn’t here when I got her hat…it must have gotten cut up against the back of the bed while I was asleep. Oh, what do I do…?”

* * * * *

What do I do? More like, what do I TELL her? It was a special hat that Applejack has had ever since she was young. There’s no way she’d ever accept her hat getting ruined like this! Even if I could get Rarity to fix it, Applejack would still eventually find out. She’d be so upset with me…I’m scared that she might not want to be friends anymore if she found out…

So here I am, finally at home after being released this morning. I hadn’t seen anypony yet today, only because I’m still a little sick, and because I’m just terrified that somepony will find out. And if I ever make contact with Applejack, she’ll wonder where her hat is, only because I wouldn’t be wearing it, afraid to ruin it further. I don’t know what to do…I know I should tell the truth, but…I just can’t! Why me? Seriously, with everything that’s gone on lately…WHY ME? Oh…I would say “please let tomorrow be better”, but that’s already jinxed me enough!

I’m sorry…I should just get some food in my stomach and get to sleep. Thanks for always listening though, diary. Things certainly would have ended up worse had it not been for you, always helping me clear up my thoughts a little. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but…until next time, I suppose?

Twilight Sparkle

Comments

[IchibanGravity]

I'm definately looking forward to seeing more!

[Darth Link 22]

I think Twilight's overreacting a little much to Applejack's scolding, considering it was far worse in A Canterlot Wedding, this shouldn't have been that big of a deal.

Still looking forward to more.

[Painfulldarksoul]

Applejack reacted like, Twilight used Fluttershy as scapegoat for murder. The reaction might be overdone a bit.

[DayDreamer]

So... there's no comments about how AJ just felt the need to have Twilights wet hair in her hat? Because that kinda made me laugh, even though that was kinda a serious moment. Good job so far though.

[Cherry Frosting]

2399994 ... Unless Applejack is confused about her feeling for Twi

[potatolyxships]

3626400
:0 YESSS