MLP G5 but it's written by me

by TPC-2k16

Why is Mayonnaise a Forbidden Word?

“And the reason why is...”

***

Once upon a time, back in ancient Equestria, and I mean like really ancient Equestria, there lived two unicorn friends.

Their names were Bubblepop Berrytwist and Granola Canola.

***

“Bubblepop Berrytwist? Granola Canola? No offense Izzy, but those all sound made up. Like, no way in all everything that is holy did ponies back then have such ridiculous names.” Hitch interrupts Izzy’s storytelling, sounding skeptical.

“Oh, those were real names,” Izzy moves uncomfortably close to Hitch to whisper, “Back then, almost all ponies had such ridiculous names like that.”

Hitch just stares at Izzy, backing away from her.

“Anyway...”

***

Their friendship was truly a sight to behold. It was so powerful, so magical, so it makes everypony around them feel all the better about themselves and others inside.

Truly, it was great.

Until one day...

***

“Pause for dramatic effect.”

***

...one day, while it was lunchtime, and the two friends were busy making lunch.

Bubblepop Berrytwist and Granola Canola were both busy preparing daisy flower sandwiches. Then came the question that would eventually doom all of unicorn kind’s vocabulary!

“Hey Bubblepop, mayo or no mayo on your sandwich?” Granola Canola asks her longtime and bestest friend, Bubblepop Berrytwist.

“No mayo please.” Bubblepop Berrytwist cheerfully replies back.

“Okay!” Despite hearing what her friend had just said, Granola Canola puts a spoonful of mayonnaise on both pieces of bread, spreading it all over the bread slice with the same spoon.

“Uh, didn’t you just hear me?” Bubblepop asks, sounding annoyed.

“Mmhm. You said yes to mayo.” Granola said cheerily.

“No. I said no to mayo.”

“Oh well, no biggie. I’ll just use my hoof to get this mayo off the bread-”

“And spread your germs all over my slices of bread? You know how much of a germaphobe I am!” Bubblepop feels taken aback, offended almost.

“Well geez, I’m sorry. Look, I’ll get another two slices and we can start over.” Granola sincerely apologizes to her best friend.

Though as she went to get another two slices of bread did she see that there were no more bread slices left.

“Oh.”

“Well that’s just great! Guess I’m not eating lunch today.”

“Bubble, speaking as your longtime bestest friend, you can have my sandwich.”

“Your bread already has mayo on it!!”

Seeing her friend be like this for the first time in like ever (and also not knowing what to do), Granola Canola activates her magic to put everything away. From the empty bread bag, the small box of daisies, a head of lettuce and lastly, the jar of mayonnaise.

“Now what are you doing? Did I say you could do that?”

“Well geez Bubble, if I had known you were gonna act like this, over mayonnaise of all things, then I wouldn’t have bought it yesterday at the market.”

“Granola, you know me more than any other pony. You should’ve known that I don’t like mayonnaise.”

Granola scowls away from her friend, mumbling something under her breath.

“Hornhead.” Bubblepop mumbles under her breath as well, only though not realizing that Granola unfortunately had heard her.

“Hornhead?!”

And what followed after was the defining point of their relationship.

They argued. Argued for the first time.

And that argument would, sadly yes, help end their friendship.

The once powerful, magical friendship ended.

And what happened next was just the cherry on top.

Their friendship was a shining light. Not to themselves but to other unicorns. Their friendship helped made everypony feel good about themselves and others. Helped everypony be good.

But as soon as it ended, everypony changed drastically... for the worst.

Without their friendship to help remind everypony of being good and kind to others, they all eventually turned on one another.

Unicorns started dividing against themselves over the silliness of reasons. And when they couldn’t even think of anything divisive, they still went out of their way to divide ponies.

And all that division eventually led to many wars. Pitting unicorn against unicorn. Neighbor against neighbor. Friend against friend.

The result of those wars eventually leading to the genocide of thousands, the slavery of hundreds, and the burned memories to every unicorn who’d ever lived during those times.

The burned memories of fear, hatred, and unkindness.

And all of it started with mayonnaise.

***

“And that, is why mayonnaise is a forbidden word.”

After hearing everything Izzy just told, Hitch does nothing but just stare at Izzy like a child stares at his parents like he did something wrong.

“All that really happened?” Hitch asks innocently.

“Nope. I made it all up. Mayonnaise is a forbidden word because we all think it’s disgusting.”

Hitch just stares at Izzy deadpanned, wide eyed. What after hearing of how Izzy just made up the whole story.

“Anyway. I told my part of the trade off. Now you gotta tell me exactly why you were at the Castle while I was there looking for beans.”

Hitch immediately goes from ‘being deadpanned’ to ‘complete and utter shock’.

“I was, uh...” Hitch’s face blushes entirely, “Izzy... I don’t think I should hang around you anymore.”

“And the reason why I was there was... because, I had to deliver sandwiches to the castle guards! Yes! And I just so happened to be in the area of interest that you were. Hehe.” Hitch smiles sheepishly (at his most obvious lie).

“Mmhm. Yes you were.” Izzy comes closer to Hitch, whispering: “But don’t worry. I knew that Pipp was going through her time of the month as I visited her first while I was out looking for beans.” Izzy raises both eyebrows up and down seductively, smiling big and bright while Hitch gulps in embarrassment.

Author's Note:

This chapter is a byproduct of me actually liking mayonnaise. Especially on a sandwich.