Chapter 7
“Good heavens, what is that smoke? What can Auntie be doing?”
“Oh my, I hope the Princess’s room isn’t on fire.”
“Did someone say roasting marshmallows?”
“No, Vinyl.”
The three had made their way up to Celestia’s bedroom and opened the door. Having been greeted by the same large cloud of smoke that had similarly greeted the Princess, they were now attempting to peer through it, though without much luck. Blueblood breathed in deeply, and immediately started coughing.
“She can’t possibly be in there. Nopony can be.”
“Is that right, Blueberry?
“Blueblood!”
“Look, there’s somepony moving around in there!”
They followed Vinyl’s pointed hoof. Indeed, there was something moving around in the cloud, growing, getting closer, becoming more defined, looking tanner. The effect of coming out of the smoke was so unsettling that Blueblood let out a little shriek when the figure started yelling.
“WELCOME TO AAAPALLOOOO-shoot! Ah keep forgetting, this ain’t Appleloosa. Anyhows, what can ah do you for?”
All three of them stood and looked at the newcomer. Even Vinyl was confused into silence. Finally, Octavia stammered out a few words.
“You... Princess... Who....What?”
Vinyl recovered her wit and muttered, “Whoever he is, he’s high as a kite.”
It was still true. Braeburn had lost interest in the visitors and had begun investigating the back of his hoof, muttering pleasantries and making offers of half-priced apples to it.
Blueblood still hadn’t said anything. Octavia looked over at him curiously, expecting a harsh comment and a demand of explanation for this invasion of his Aunt’s place. Instead, he stood silent, with his mouth open and his eyes wide as a dinner plates, staring at Braeburn.
Catching the cellist looking at him, he scowled at her and said “Well? Do something about him!”
“Me???”
“Yes, you. You’re the scary one. No. Wait. You know what, I’ll deal with him. No, wait. How about-”
Blueblood and Octavia began arguing about what to do with Braeburn. Vinyl, meanwhile, trotted forward, took a deep breath, and entered the bedroom.
The smoke was clearing a bit from the door being open, but the white unicorn made immediately for the balcony and, using her magic, pushed open the doors. The room began to clear more rapidly. Vinyl took a deep breath and trotted out onto the balcony further. There, something below caught her eye.
“Hey Tavi!” she called back through the bedroom.
“Yes, Vinyl?”
“More bad news.”
*** *** ***
“Fly, you fool!”
“Who are you calling a fool, Sister?”
“You, if you don’t get your flank in motion!”
The royal sisters were galloping wildly through the caverns, their horns throwing off beams of light every which way. Behind them, the tribe of pale ponies thundered after them, some of them screeching.
“I don’t think this is where we came in!” Celestia tossed a glance behind them, singeing a few tribesponies with her light spell. “And they’re gaining!”
“Well, Sister, if you had kept your mouth shut, we might have made it out sooner!”
A few minutes earlier, immediately after the leader had uttered his thinly veiled threat, Luna’s horn began to glow. She closed her eyes, concentrating on her teleportation spell. It would be more difficult, given the tons of rock above her, but she could do it. Next to her, she knew Celestia would be doing the same thing, preparing herself mentally for the spell that would whisk them out of danger and-
“Hey! Loony! Don’t go to sleep on me!”
“What?”
Luna’s eyes popped open. Celestia was a few steps in front of her, her horn beginning to glow brightly. Too bright for a teleportation spell. More like-
“Ha ha! Take that, ya savages!”
The Princess of the Sun laughed as she began to fire bolts of white-hot light into the crowd of creatures. Some began to turn and run, but the leader, who had deftly ducked under the opening salvo, raised his head and let out a screech that pierced through the ears of everyone in range.
“BUCK!” shouted Celestia. Her headache was back, and with vengeance. Just as quickly, her light spell petered out, and her horn grew dark. She collapsed, covering her ears.
Behind the leader of the tribesponies, the screech had summoned others. Great masses of pale white bodies were were assembling. A few of them were even floating above. The best word to describe it was horde.
“Well? Start blasting!” Celestia yelled. Her horn glowed weakly again.
“Sister, are you still drunk?”
“I wish! Get us out of here!”
“Are you capable of a teleportation spell?”
“Do I look like I am?”
“You look like you might use a long rest on the moon.”
“What? Stop mumbling!”
“I said get up! We need to move!”
With great effort, Celestia raised herself to her hooves. She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth. Her horn began to glow again.
“Ow... buck! Hang on... there.” She began to cast an illumination spell, weaker than before.
As she did, the mass of tribesponies began to surge forward towards them. Celestia began to brandish her horn, but Luna grabbed her with her magic and tossed her down the tunnel behind her before turning and running.
Now, they galloped through the caves, the horde thundering after them. Left, right, leap the chasm, left again- hopelessly lost. The noise behind them was getting closer, and Celestia was slowing down, her hangover returning. Luna gritted her teeth and galloped faster, using her magic to aid her sister. Just as things looked hopeless-
“Hey! Listen! Over here!”
*** *** ***
“Hey, Snails?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you hungry, too?”
“Yeah! Oh, yeah! For pudding!”
“Well, you know, for anything. Come on, let’s get down a few flights. We probably don’t want to mess up the sun again or anything.”
“Right. Okay, to the pudding!”
“No, or just- Whatever.”
The two alicorns trotted down a few flights of stairs and found a few more. Snips looked down.
“Ugh. I’m tired. Hey, why don’t we try the wings?”
“Uh... didn’t we already?”
“Yeah, but you know, fly outside. C’mon, we can get out this window and fly down the ground!”
“Uh, alright...”
Snips crossed to a window and magicked it open. He stuck his head out and looked down.
“We’re about three flights up. C’mon, we can make it!”
Taking a deep breath, he put his front hooves outside. The wind swirled in around him, cold and quick. He hesitated a moment, then pushed with his back legs and shot out of the window, first forward and then down. The ground rushed up to meet him at a sickening rate, getting closer and closer and-
And then his wings flew open and he swooped so low he grazed a few treetops. Pulling up, he did a tight barrel roll, feeling the wind flow through his feathers.
“WHOOOO! SNAILS! YOU GOTTA TRY THIS!”
Back in the hallway, Snails scratched his head with a hoof, then approached the window. He stuck his head out and looked down. The ground seemed so far away. His wings snapped themselves shut, and he backed up. Outside, Snips was still doing loops. Snails sat down and shut his eyes.
“Just gonna gather my strength. Just gotta take a second. Just gotta get to the ground. The ground. I can make it to the ground...”
His horn began to glow. He opened his eyes and had just enough time to say “Huh?” before he disappeared in a bright flash of magic.
Snips saw the flash and swooped by the window. Seeing no Snails, he began to panic before another flash caught in the corner of his eye. He spun in the air to see, far below, Snails staggering a bit. He flew down.
“Snails! You’re okay!”
“Uh... yeah! Yeah.”
“What happened?”
“I dunno. I closed my eyes, and then... I was here!”
“Snails, that’s a teleportation spell! We learned about them in school!”
“But... that’s really powerful magic! Only Miss Twilight can do that back home!”
“Uhh... yeah.”
“Do you know what this means?”
“We can go find pudding now?”
“Yeah! I mean, no!”
“Aww...”
“Well, later. No, we must be good at magic now!”
“Oh boy!”
“Hey, who’s that?”
“Huh?”
Snails turned to look where Snips was looking. A large procession of ponies with carts was coming up the drive, seemingly headed for the main gate. A few of the closest ones noticed the two and started shouting.
“Uh oh!” said Snips. “We’d better get inside. They probably think we’re the Princesses.”
“Yeah,” agreed Snails. “Even though we’re not.”
“And we don’t have time to sign autographs and stuff.”
“Yup.”
“I’ll race you inside! Wings against teleport!”
Snails laughed. “You’re on!”
Snips took off in a blast, flying low and heading for the castle. Snails closed his eyes and was gone in a flash a moment later, just as the first of the ponies from the caravan had gotten near. He scratched his head with a hoof as a few others came up behind him.
“-No, no! I’d swear I saw them right here! The Royal Sisters themselves, with their coats dyed a new color! Too bad they flew off, my kids really wanted an autograph...”
*** *** ***
“This way!”
Luna turned towards the voice without thinking. The path took them directly towards a large chasm. There was no way they could jump it, she couldn’t even see the other side-
“Up here!”
The Princesses looked up, catching sight of a silhouette above them, slightly surrounded with light. Without thinking on who it might be or why they were there, Luna closed her eyes and, with a mighty effort, managed to teleport herself and Celestia up to the ledge. She turned to see a number of tribesponies fall into the pit they had just avoided. The majority, however, stopped short and glared at them.
Celestia whispered “They have wings. Why aren’t they flying over?”
“My guess is the light,” said Luna. “We seem to be right at the entrance where we came in. My mistake for not recognizing it in the first place.” She turned to look at it and caught sight of their mysterious helper. “Thank you, by the way. I didn’t recognize you at first.”
The Princess of the Sun turned as well. “Wait, who are you? How do you two know each other?”
The stranger stepped forward and extended a hoof.
“We met last night, highness, though you may not remember. My name is Lyra Heartstrings.”
*** *** ***
“You must be joking. A caravan?”
“Yeah, Tavi! I’m looking right at it!”
“Wonderful.” The cellist put a hoof to her head. “They must be here to begin setting up for the Gala. What time is it now, anyway?”
“No idea.”
“Ugh. Well, the Gala is this evening, and none of the staff seem to be prepared for the challenge. The sun and the moon are switching places without reason, and the Princesses are nowhere to be found. This rube” she indicated Braeburn- “is too far gone to tell us anything useful, and we still have no clue what happened last night. Please, could this situation be any worse?”
“That’s never a good thing to ask. Jinxes everything.” said Blueblood.
“Nobody asked you, Blueweed.” said Vinyl.
“My name-”
“His name’s Blueblood!” interrupted Braeburn. He looked proud of himself.
The prince looked a little stunned. He blushed.
Vinyl shook her head. “What a perfect couple. Tavi, what are we gonna do?”
“I’m not sure, Vinyl. Let me think- no, that’s no good, we need to head them off downstairs. They can’t get into the castle until the Princesses get back. Come, Vinyl, we’ll meet them at the front. I’ll think of something on the way down, I’m sure...”
“Sounds good. Hey, princey, you coming? For once, we could use your royalty. And if they get violent, it looks like I can gallop faster than you.”
Blueblood made a face at her, then glanced at Braeburn. “Err- no. I’ll stay here and keep an eye on him. One never knows what he might get up to in Auntie’s room.”
Vinyl looked curiously at him. “...Alright, then. Let’s go, Tavi.”
“Indeed.”
They trotted out the door. Braeburn watched them go and gave a small wave. He and Blueblood sat in awkwardness for a moment. Blueblood broke the silence first.
“So... do you come here often?”
*** *** ***
***Author’s note:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdrYlaEe41A
Sorry for the slightly longer wait on this one. Also, with any luck, Cade will be back writing with me by the next chapter or two!
As always, thanks for reading. Comment/message as you please!
Aryn
This is really good. I love how you got the idea of having snips and snails become alicorns.
What else can possibly go wrong?
This is Australia...
Braeburn high as fuck is still finny.
Hope Lyra Heartstrings gets a bigger part in all these shenanigans in the next chapter.
INSTA-READ
...Nooo....
...Nonono....
i1020.photobucket.com/albums/af325/earthnow/HO-Fairy.gif
i1020.photobucket.com/albums/af325/earthnow/HO-Fairy.gif
NONONONONONONONONO D: NOT HER! ANYTHING BUT HER
2316904 WATCH OUT LEMME INTERRUPT I'LL LET YOU FINISH IN A SECOND BUT WALLMASTER HAS THE BEST SHADOW OF ALL TIME
This can only end well.
>>>The stranger stepped forward and extended a hoof.
“We met last night, highness, though you may not remember. My name is Lyra Heartstrings.”>>>
ARRRRG!!! Stop tormenting poor Lyra! Hasn't she been forgotten enough?! LET HER BE REMEMBERED GOD DAMMMMMMMIIIITTT!!!!! *Alondro rage erupts and the entire world asplodes in a raging inferno*
Huh... did it again... I really need to attend anger management one of these days. *snaps fingers and world is restored! And Lyra is remembered because Alondro is Super Kami Guru Kai Supremo Ultimatisimo and thus is at a higher management level than the Cosmic Matriarch* So there! Nyah!
2316904
I never made that connection until that comment. Now i'm pretty sure either i'm burning something down tonight, or having nightmares. Not entirely sure which at this point.
2316904
Ahh, you got the reference. haha that was just a throwaway joke for all my fellow LoZ fans out there.
2318685 Ugh. Shame on youuuu...
2321431 Burn it all. Burn it to the groundddd...
2321680 There is no "I" in "Team". There is no "U" in "Noble". And there is no...
..."F" in "Way"...that I would miss that reference. XD Good on ya.
I'm really enjoying this story so far, it's just the right level of absurd!
(And I made to sure to read it with "Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)" playing on repeat)
First Celestia, then Blueblood. Royalty must love Braeburn.
That moment with Lyra... I had to double check and make sure that I wasn't reading anything by SS&E.
Dat song + chapter ending
2344007Who doesn't?
I have never seen Braeblood ship before.