Harmony's Thieves

by 4428Gamer

The Big Talker

??? POV

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Fhisssh!

“I’M UP!” I screamed. “I’M UP, WHA’S WRONG?!”

I forced my eyes open and started shaking my head in every direction to get the water, and ice, off of my face.

The first thing I saw was something large standing over me. The room didn’t have any lamps but there were plenty of windows to let in the sunlight.

Sunlight?! I panicked even further. Crabapples! How’d I oversleep by that much?!

“Oh good, you're awake,” A deep voice cheered. “Big Mike thought you would sleep through the water too.”

“Nuh-Nope,” I stuttered. And then spat out a piece of ice. “Whazzuh time?”

“Time? Uh…” Through the water I was still trying to wipe out of my eyes, I saw the large thing move a little. “It’s… 3:58.”

“Four o’clock?!” I shouted. “How’d Ah stay down that long?!”

When I could finally see clearly I stared up at the. At. At the…

What in tarnation...?

Standing, well, looming over me was a large pale-colored thing with what looked like some sort of shirt over his torso. Then, in one of its claws that made the paper cup it was holding look like it was made for a mouse.

On the limb its other claw was on was what I guessed to be a watch. Except it was glowing just enough to see it clearly. The barn-sized shadow the thing was casting would have hidden the watch face otherwise.

The thing’s face didn’t have too many features to note about. It had a shaved mane and no horns or muzzle to speak of. Just this regular, pale face.

The face then twisted into one of guilt.

“Right. Personal bubble space. Sorry.” It started to back away, letting its shadow slink away from me.

“...What are you?” I spoke slow and careful.

I watched as the thing’s expression lit up. “Oh yeah! Big Mike shoulda done that part sooner. Sorry,” it apologized again.

It straightened up its back, making it seem that tad bit taller and spoke. “Big Mike’s my name. He woke up in his Good Chair over there in this...I think it’s a chair store?” It put a finger to its chin and glanced around.

I took a second to do the same. It wasn’t a place I ever went inside of but I recognized it. It was the Quill & Sofa store. I passed by it every time I came to the market to set up the stand.

But if I never came in here, what am I doing here now? I’m pretty sure I was...I was…

…

...Can’t remember.

“Hold on a second,” this ‘Big Mike’ creature announced. “If we’re in a chair store, and Big Mike’s Good Chair is in here…” The pieces started falling into place for him.

“They stole Big Mike’s chair!” It crushed the cup in his claw and instantly looked as frightening as I imagined.

Not what I would’ve focused on but okay.

Then Big Mike gasped again. “And, hold on. Did they kinda steal Big Mike too?”

They? I perked up. He know what happened?

“If they stole Big Mike then.” Next, he swung around to look at me. “That means they stole you and the little girl too!” He blinked and all his fury vanished. “Is that your chair?”

Little girl? Steal? My chair?

I looked around me and saw that rather than lying in my bed like I thought, I was set up in this plushy loveseat thing. It seemed pretty small for me though. More so than usual.

I tried craning my head back to get a better look at the thing when I finally noticed. My red muzzle that I had been so used to seeing was...gone? It was replaced with this pale, triangle thing.

Like that Big Mike thing’s face looked.

I brought up a hoof in front of me and—

My hoof was tannish-pale and cut into five pieces.

“BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH~!”

“WoaOaoaoaAAAAAAAAAAAH~!”

When I started screaming, the Big Mike screamed with me, darting back and forth like a rat fell on his back.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH~!”

“AAAAAAAAA—!”

As we kept screaming, Big Mike stopped moving and found something on a counter. He picked it up and—

Fhisssh!

Doused me with another cup of water.

I said nothing. I did stop screaming though. So did Big Mike.

After a brief few seconds, it took a step towards me.

“Uh. Are…” He started to shrink in on himself, looking very guilty. “Are you good now?”

“...” I took a deep breath.

“P’tugh!” And spit out another ice cube.

“E-Eeyup,” I said shakily.

Big Mike sighed in relief. “Oh good. Big Mike thought you were hurt or something.”

Just my mind, right now, I thought. ...Maybe a tad bit of pride.

Big Mike took a few steps back and fell into the biggest armchair in the store. Probably that ‘good chair’ it was talking about. Then Big Mike looked behind itself.

“Huh. None of that screaming woke the girl either. Big Mike thought that would be loud enough.”

He keeps bringing up a girl. Who’s he talking about?

I tried looking past Big Mike myself but my body felt completely different. I could move my front legs almost normally but the talon things that were at the end of each claw felt weird. Each talon could move separately. It made a chill go down my spine every time one of them bended.

My back legs seemed to be the only thing that felt the same. Even if they were covered in some sort of denim wrapping. At the very least they bent the same way they were supposed to. My front legs were bending the wrong way entirely.

“Do you wanna see her?” Big Mike asked.

After a moment, I nodded. “Eeyup.”

“Okay then.”

The creature quickly got up from his giant chair and shifted it across the floor boards with ease.

When he was clear I saw what he meant by little girl. Compared to him, and, I guess, me, the thing up ahead looked less than half our size. But it was definitely the same creature Big Mike was.

Except it had a small white horn peeking out from under its swirly, light colored hair.

“I tried waking her up too,” Big Mike explained. “Tried shaking and talking but nothing worked. Was gonna try the water but…” He looked at the now empty paper cup. “Aww. Now Big Mike needs more ice.”

The way Big Mike talked was sort of weird. It kind of reminded me of that performer unicorn from a while back the way he talked with his name.

I tried looking at the girl a little harder. The horn on their head was a pure white unlike the rest of her pale skin but that swirly hair. It reminded me of—

My eyes widened.

“Sweetie Belle!” I shouted.

“Hmm?” Big Mike looked at her. “You know her?”

“Eeyup.” I nodded frantically.

“Well that’s good.” He smiled. “Big Mike doesn’t know either of you. Here, let Big Mike bring her to you.”

“N-Nope,” I told him. “Ah got‘er.”

I leaned forward so that I could walk off this chair but when my flank started to leave the seat something felt wrong. Like I was gonna fall or something.

Out of instinct, my forelegs started flailing around and before I knew it, the claws at the end of each leg wrapped themselves around the arm of the chair. I pulled myself back up and sat there with stiff shoulders.

“You okay?” Big Mike took a step to me.

“...” My breathing picked up but I felt okay now.

“If you’re not feeling good, I can help you.” He glanced down at the cup still in his claw. “Do you want me to get water?”

I smacked my lips for a second. My throat was a little dry.

“Eeyup,” I admitted. Some water would probably be good right about now. To drink, not splash.

He beamed a smile at me .“Okay, Big Mike can do that. The food truck that he got it from is just down the road.”

As he said that to me, he started to walk to the entrance of the store.

Tur-uck? I blinked. The hay is that supposed to mean?

I sat back and watched as he went out the door. From where I sat, I could see streamers going from rooftop to rooftop and colorful paper littering the streets outside.

When did a carnival start up in Ponyville? And since when does the carnival set up inside of town?

I looked back to Sweetie Belle. It had to be her. Even if she looked like that Big Mike thing and had odd clothes on her, that mane style and horn gave her away.

But while I looked at her, something sprung up in my mind. If she and I were these weird weird creatures, what about everypony else?

Applebloom. And Granny Smith. I bit my lip. Are they like this too? And if so, where are they?

I looked at my legs. That Big Mike fella seemed like the same thing I was. Creepy as it seemed, I needed to figure out how to get moving. And that creature was moving around like he was already used to it.

I planted both of these claws on the arms of the chair and looked at my back legs. It took a minute but I figured out how to stand up on only my back legs.

What was weird is that once I was standing like this, it felt natural. Like some instinct was kicking in. And even though I was still holding onto the chair for all I was worth, I was able to take a step forward. And another.

After another minute I was walking up to Sweetie Belle. I had to use every chair between me and her for support but I managed. By the time I reached Sweetie, I was certain that it was her.

If it wasn’t for all the water on my face, I’d be calling this a dream right about now.

I put a claw on Sweetie’s shoulder and tried to shake her awake. “Sweetie. Sweetie Belle? Ya hear me? Wake up now.”

No answer. Not even a snore. Wait, did Sweetie Belle snore? I never hung around Applebloom and her friends when they spent the night. I suppose I had no clue.

Sweetie was breathing steadily though. She didn’t look hurt either aside from the…’new creature’ thing.

Well that’s a good sign. I hope.

The bell above the door of the store rang and Big Mike was back with three or four cups of water. When he saw me out of the seat, he smiled.

“Awesome, you’re up. Big Mike thought you’d be too tired to walk or something.” He carefully set down most of the waters and walked over to pass me one of the cups.

I looked down at the claw he was holding the water with and then at my own. The talon parts curled up easily enough so maybe I could…

“Thanks,” I muttered, taking the cup in both claws as if it were some baby bird.

He nodded to me before looking back at Sweetie. “No luck, huh?”

“Eenope,” I sighed. I looked back at him. “So...Big. Mike?” He blinked. “Ah’m Big McIntosh. Call me Big Mac if’n it helps.”

Big Mike just smiled. “Oh, that’s a relief. Big Mike’s usually really bad with names. If it sounds like mine then Big Mike can remember.”

“...Eeyup.” I went along with it. “So. Who’s they?”

“They?” He frowned. “They who?”

I rolled my jaw. “Ya said ‘they’ stole yer chair...And us?”

I witnessed an attic light up. “Ohhh! That. No clue! Big Mike just thought someone brought us here.” He glanced outside. “By the way. Where’s here?”

I took my time sipping on my water. Oh boy. This fella’s as lost as a lamb in a hedge maze.

“Ponyville,” I answered.

“And where’s that?” Not a beat missed with his question.

“...Equestria?” I crinkled my nose.

His head turned to the side like a dog’s. “Never heard of it.”

How’s that possible?

“Is it close to a highway?” He asked me.

I raised an eyebrow. “Eenope.”

“Yeah, thought so. All Big Mike can see is dirt roads and purple skies.” He put down all the cups except for one.

“Purple?”

“Mm-hmm,” He hummed through his water. “Big Mike thought the sun was setting but the sun was still there and everything was still bright out. But the sky’s purple for some reason.”

I looked over at the windows and slowly started shambling over. At some point I spilled my water on this ugly lime green sofa but I made it regardless. After spotting my reflection and getting hives just from seeing it, I put my face up against the glass and saw exactly what Big Mike meant.

High up in the sky, no doubt higher than most pegasi would go, was this large purple dome. If you didn’t pay too much attention then I guess you could think the sky was purple but that wasn’t what was happening.

Whatever it was, I only knew that it would take a lot out of whatever unicorn probably did that.

Now how’s come seeing that dome is more normal than seeing my own reflection right now?

Big Mike walked up next to me and finished off his cup of water. “That’s not supposed to be there, is it?”

“Eenope,” I told him.

He hummed and started eyeballing another cup of water.

“Uh. Big Mike?”

“Yeah?” He looked back at me.

“You see a different little girl, by chance? Red hair. Big bow. Um...Answers ta Applebloom?”

If the same thing happened to her that happened to me and Sweetie Belle, I don’t think I could describe her that well.

“Nope,” he answered proudly. “But while we’re asking, have you seen a guy with glasses, black hair and a leather jacket? Kinda short, plays with cards and talks...Really good? His name’s Joe.”

“Eenope.”

“Oh.”

…

…

“You think that we should go look for ‘em?” He asked.

“...Eeyup,” I decided.

Standing here wasn’t going to help anypony. And Big Mike, whatever he was, didn’t seem like a bad…thing. I think he had no clue what was going on either.

“Alrighty then. Big Mike’ll get the girl.”

Before he could go, I put a claw on his shoulder.

“Eenope.”

“Huh? But why?”

“Ah got‘er.”

Before I could walk past, Big Mike held out his foreleg to block me.

“Hold on. You sure you wanna do that?” His expression didn’t look threatening anymore. It was more like concern.

“Eeyup.”

He bit his lip. “I mean...Big Mike won’t force you not to, but you don’t really look like you can walk that well. You’re walking all funny.”

I frowned. “Ah got it.”

I moved my own forelegs to push his out of the way but he just swung it right back in my way. In that instant, I realized that he only had an inch or two on me in height. He only seemed bigger earlier because I was sitting down.

“What if you trip?” He insisted. “Then you and the girl might fall and get hurt.”

I didn’t feel that scared of this guy anymore. I kept my frown and narrowed my eyes.

“Nnope.”

Neither of us said anything for what would have felt like a long time to somepony else. But we both knew it was only a few seconds.

I didn’t think that this Big Mike fella would try anything but I didn’t know him well either. Plus, when Sweetie Belle woke up she was probably gonna be scared. The least I could do was make sure she’d wake up with somepony she knew keeping an eye on her.

But I wasn’t about to deny that Big Mike had a point. If I saw somepony who couldn’t walk straight trying to carry a foal, I would help them out, no buts about it. Although I was not about to let the filly fall on my watch. That was a fact.

“...” Big Mike’s concern soured a tad into frustration. He may have been the straight-forward type but his heart was in the right spot. I think he saw where I was coming from at least.

“...Two miles,” he spoke. “If you can walk two miles and not fall down, then you carry her. I won’t let her get hurt.”

I rolled my jaw from side to side, mulling it over.

“...Two miles,” I started. “Or a half hour. Whichever’s first.”

He nodded but didn’t back off. “Kay.”

I didn’t back off either.

“And. Y’all never leave mah sight.”

He took a second. “You fall down or need to lean on something, we add a mile.”

“Or ten minutes,” I reasoned. “If’n we find any a’ mah family needs carryin’, no contest. Ah do it.”

His frown finally broke out into a grin.

“Deal.” He held out his claw.

It took me a second, but when I figured it out I reached at it with my own. With a heavy clap, he clasped my arm and gave it a shake. It was different but I knew the meaning.

“Can you get the door?” He asked as he started to turn for Sweetie Belle.

“Eeyup.”

With a stern look, I opened the door, Big Mike got Sweetie Belle, and we were out on the street to start walking.

Author's Note:

And the second group is introduced!

I noticed that it's kinda difficult writing dialogue with these two. Big Mac is a man of few words and Big Mike is written to be straight forward. I also know that their names might be a little annoying to read back to back. Sorry about that.

QotC: I never quite understood the Quill & Sofa's Store. Why that combination exactly? I don't think it's just a throwaway joke, they use the store several times. Would anyone even use that store? Do you think the sofa's are good quality or kinda shoddy? And why are they always outta quills?!

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Crazy, nonsensical rant aside, any and all feedback is always appreciated! I hope you enjoy the story!

Comments

[CyberDragon89ponies]

Neat idea having the story be told from the perspective of someone who isn't the human being introduced.

[NotAnEditor]

All the birds they got the quills from are heavily endangered. Driven to extinction from the high quill demand. The Quill and Sofa's store is one of the only places that can sell it legally, of course the government enacted a law to make it so they could only sell so much. At least within the law. In the door behind the counter piled high to the roof is hundreds of quills plucked from nearly dead and endangered birds. If you know the right somebody, there's enough quills for you and your family. Easiest way to grab some supply, aside from of course the black market.