Prologue: What did I lose? (Spoiler Alert !!)
The crystal mirror glowed, and from it came a yellow mare with yellow and red mane. She carried a brown backpack with a drawing of a red and yellow sun. Her name was Sunset Shimmer. Former Princess Celestia’s student. Sunset Shimmer looked around and was surprised to see that she wasn’t in Twilight Castle, but in Canterlot Castle. Sunset Shimmer found it strange.
Weird. Why is the mirror in Canterlot? I think i better go ask Twilight about that.
Sunset Shimmer opened the door and was surprised. The castle has changed a lot. She wondered if Celestia and Luna wanted to change the style of the castle. Everything was so confusing.
“Hey. Who are you?”
Sunset Shimmer was startled by the voice and saw a blue griffon wearing gold armor, “I am Sunset Shimmer. And you?”
The griffon calmed down, “ah. You’re Sunset Shimmer’s friend. I’m sorry. I didn’t know it was you. My name is Gallus”
“Ah. Hi Gallus”, Sunset Shimmer greeted with a smile. She didn’t know him but she smiled friendly.
“So what do you do here?” asked Gallus, now curious.
“Princess Twilight is here?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
“Yes. She is in the throne room with Spike. Would you like me to inform her of your arrival?” said Gallus.
“Yes. Please, Gallus”, Sunset Shimmer replied.
Gallus nodded before heading toward the throne room. Sunset Shimmer followed him. Sunset Shimmer watched as the castle changed a lot.
Things look different since the last time I came here. I’m sure Celestia will better explain to me what is going on.
Gallus opened the door to the throne room and closed it. Sunset Shimmer waited outside the throne room. She heard the voice of Gallus and Twilight Sparkle on the other side.
“Majesty, you have a visitor”
“Who came to visit me?”
“Sunset Shimmer”
“You can let her in”
Sunset Shimmer heard footsteps and stepped back. She saw Gallus leave, “Twilight left. You may come in”
“Thank you”, that said, Sunset Shimmer came in. She was surprised by what she saw. The castle was very different since she visited to ask Celestia for help.
“Sunset, I missed you”
Sunset Shimmer looked where the voice was coming from and she was surprised by what she saw. Twilight Sparkle was a grown alicorn with golden perks. Beside her was Spike, he grew up and wore a locket. Sunset Shimmer was surprised. Where was Celestia and Luna?
Twilight Sparkle went to Sunset Shimmer, who was confused, “Sunset, are you ok?”
Sunset Shimmer looked at Twilight, still surprised. She couldn’t believe the alicorn in front of her was Twilight. How long has it been? “Yes, Twilight”
Twilight Sparkle didn’t seem to accept the answer, “are you sure?”
Sunset Shimmer sighed, before looking at Twilight, “Why are you the size of Celestia?”
Twilight Sparkle looked nervous, “It’s just… Sunset… Celestia and Luna… Let’s say they retired and now I’m rule Equestria…”
Sunset Shimmer was surprised. Celestia and Luna retired? But why? “Why did they retire?”
Twilight Sparkle didn’t know how to explain, “I think it’s because they think I’m ready to rule Equestria. Celestia and Luna told me they would only retire when I was ready. And after Chrysalis, Tirek and Cozy Gloom were turned into stones, they knew I was ready to rule Equestria”
Sunset Shimmer was fighting not to cry, “but, I don’t understand ... What did I lose ...?”
Twilight Sparkle put a wing on Sunset Shimmer, “Sunset, would you like to go to the dining room for tea?”
Sunset Shimmer smiled, though she still had tears in her eyes, “it’s a good idea”
Twilight Sparkle started walking. Sunset Shimmer followed her. As they walked, Sunset continued to look at the changes the castle underwent.
Everything has changed… Nothing is the same. Where would Celestia and Luna be?
Sunset Shimmer heard door sound open. She didn’t know why she was surprised. It was obvious that the whole castle was now modified. Twilight Sparkle sat in a chair. Sunset Shimmer sat next to her. A waiter came to where they were sitting, “what would you like to eat?”
“Tea, please”, answered Twilight Sparkle.
The waiter bowed before doing what Twilight ordered
Sunset Shimmer looked at Twilight, “So, are you technically a queen?”
Twilight was surprised, “well ... I think so ...”
“How are your friends?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
Twilight Sparkle smiled sadly, “They’re all old. Fluttershy and Discord are together, Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich had a daughter, Rainbow Dash and Applejack seem to be together, I’m not sure. It depends on each pony’s point of view and Starlight and Sunburst had a daughter named Luster Dawn, and she’s my student”
Sunset Shimmer was now crying, “Gee. It must be hard for you to see your friends grow old while you are immortal”
Twilight Sparkle was almost crying, but wiped it off with a hull, “yes, it’s hard. When they are no longer here, it will be difficult to rule alone without my friends. But I know I have no choice but to keep moving on”
Sunset Shimmer was fighting not to cry, “Gee. I see how much you grew and matured ”
Twilight Sparkle smiled, “thank you, Sunset”
Suddenly the kitchen doors opened and the waiter brought a banner with two cups of tea and a teapot. The waiter set it on the table before leaving. Twilight Sparkle poured tea.
Sunset Shimmer picked up the cup of tea already with her magic, “As time went by fast”
Twilight Sparkle nodded, “Time goes by, yes, Sunset. And we must enjoy every moment of our lives”
“Yes, Twilight”, said Sunset Shimmer, before sipping some tea.
“What happened to your Ponyville castle?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
Twilight Sparkle stopped drinking tea and looked down, “I left him”
Sunset Shimmer was surprised, “what? But why?”
“Sunset, I had no choice. I would have to move permanently to Canterlot in order to rule Equestria. Friendship Castle is now an abandoned house”, explained Twilight Sparkle.
“Are you sad to have to leave Ponyville and your Ponyville castle?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
Twilight, still staring at the floor replied, “Yes. But I know it was necessary. It was a sacrifice I had to make”
Sunset Shimmer smiled sadly, “I see you changed a lot, Twilight”
Twilight looked at Sunset, she was smiling a little, “thank you, Sunset”
A silence, until…
“Do you spend all day in this castle?”
“Well, not always. But I spend a lot of time in Canterlot”
“Do you visit Ponyville?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
“Sometimes. If I’m not that busy”, answered Twilight Sparkle.
“How are things in Ponyville?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
“There are new ponies, the foals I saw before must have grown”, answered Twilight Sparkle.
Sunset Shimmer wasn’t surprised by this. Because she knew it was kind of obvious.
“Do your friends live Ponyville yet?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
“Yes. But they visit me”, answered Twilight Sparkle.
“I think I should visit to see your friends and meet this new student of yours”, said Sunset Shimmer.
Twilight Sparkle smiled, “Yeah. I’m sure they will be happy to see you”
Sunset Shimmer smiled back, “ok. I will do this after I finish drinking tea”
After Sunset Shimmer had finished her tea, she went to the train station. She sat up and stared at the sky.
It’s amazing that Equestria has changed. Celestia and Luna have ceased to rule and now Twilight Sparkle rules Equestria. I wonder where Luna and Celestia would be.
When the train stopped, Sunset Shimmer got off the train and went looking for friends of Twilight Sparkle. Sunset Shimmer decided to go first at Boutique Carrousel, she knocked on the door. Hooves were heard. The door opened and Rarity appeared, “Hi, Sunset Shimmer. It’s been a while since I see you”
Sunset Shimmer smiled, though inside he was sad, “Hi, Rarity. How are things?”
“They are good. Thanks for asking”, Rarity replied with a smile.
Sunset Shimmer wanted to say more things. But she had no business to talk about, “well, I’m going”
“Okay, dear”, said Rarity, before closing the door.
When Rarity closed the door, Sunset Shimmer walked back.
Ok. I’ve seen Rarity. Missing now: Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Luster Dawn.
When Sunset Shimmer arrived at Fluttershy’s house, she noticed that still had animals outside.
Yeah. Some things never change.
When Sunset Shimmer arrived at the door, she knocked with a hoof. Footsteps have ears. And Fluttershy opened the door, “Oh. Hi, Sunset Shimmer”
“Hi Fluttershy. How are things?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
Fluttershy smiled, “oh. They’re wonderful. Discord and I are together”
Sunset Shimmer smiled, “congratulations”
“Would you like to come in? Discord and I were having tea”, Fluttershy offered with a smile.
“That’s very kind of you, Fluttershy. But I came here just to see how you all were”, Sunset Shimmer replied.
“OK. If you need anything, just let me know”, said Fluttershy, before closing the door.
Sunset Shimmer left Fluttershy’s home.
Okay. Now there’s Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Luster Dawn.
When Sunset Shimmer arrived at Sugarcube Corner, she entered. She was surprised that the store was still the same.
“Oh. Hi, Sunset”
Sunset Shimmer looked where the voice came from. She saw Pinkie Pie behind the counter, “Did you eat something?”
“No. But I came here to know how your life is,” Sunset Shimmer replied. “How is she?”
Pinkie Pie smiled, “a wonder. Cheese Sandwich and I have a foal”
“Congratulations Pinkie Pie”, smiled Sunset Shimmer.
“Are you sure you don’t want to eat something?”
“I’m sure”
“Well then, goodbye”, said Pinkie Pie.
As Sunset Shimmer walked, she wondered where she should look. She didn’t know if she should look in Sweet Apple Acres or cloudsdale. She would first look in Sweet Apple Acres. Then in Cloudsdale. She just hoped Applejack and Rainbow Dash were there. Because she knew that if they were in Cloudsdale it would be harder. She decided to rush towards the Sweet Apple Acres. While doing this, some ponies watched Sunset Shimmer run.
After a long run, Sunset Shimmer has arrived to the farm, she was surprised to see Applejack, Rainbow Dash and a yellow horsehair unicorn sitting in a tree. She went to them. Rainbow Dash and Applejack heard footsteps. They looked and saw Sunset Shimmer, “ah. Hi, Sunset Shimmer”, said Rainbow Dash.
“Hi, Rainbow Dash,” greeted Sunset Shimmer. “How are things going?”
“Good. Applejack and I are together”, said Rainbow Dash.
“Congratulations,” Sunset Shimmer noticed a pink unicorn with yellow mane staring at her. She approached the unicorn.
“Hi. My name is Sunset Shimmer. And yours?” Greeted Sunset Shimmer.
“My name is Luster Dawn,” replied Luster Dawn with a smile. “I’m a student of Princess Twilight Sparkle”
Sunset Shimmer just managed to smile, “Well, I’m going. It was good to meet you, Luster Dawn”, Sunset Shimmer turned her back and started walking.
Luster Dawn was confused now, “where are you going?”
Sunset Shimmer looked back, “I’m going back to Canterlot Castle to talk to Twilight Sparkle”
“To do what?” asked Luster Dawn.
“To talk to Twilight a little more”, Sunset Shimmer replied.
Luster Dawn smiled, “Well, good luck, Sunset”
Sunset Shimmer smiled back, “thank you, Luster Dawn”, Sunset Shimmer said before walking back.
As Sunset Shimmer walked out of Sweet Apple Acres, she began to think about what she was going to do next. Sunset planned to ask for a map for Twilight so she could get to know other places in Equestria to try to find Celestia.
I just hope Twilight has a map…
Meanwhile, Twilight was on the balcony to lower the sun and raise the moon. When she was done she looked at the moon. She let out a breath as she smiled.
I hope Celestia and Luna are having fun…
Suddenly she heard footsteps. Gallus appeared, “Majesty, Sunset wants to talk to you”
“Let her in”, said Twilight Sparkle.
Gallus went to do what Twilight asked and gave Sunset Shimmer permission to enter. Sunset Shimmer approached Twilight, “Twilight”
Twilight Sparkle approached Sunset Shimmer, “Yes, Sunset?”
“Do you have a map?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
Twilight Sparkle was confused, “But why do you need a map?”
“For me to explore the other places and towns of Equestria to try to find Celestia”, Sunset Shimmer replied.
“Well, I think I have a map in the library”, answered Twilight Sparkle.
“Can I go to the library?” asked Sunset Shimmer.
Twilight Sparkle smiled, “Of course, Sunset. You will always be welcome here at the castle and the library”
Sunset Shimmer smiled, “thank you, Twilight”, Sunset Shimmer said before heading toward the library. Twilight Sparkle watched Sunset leave the throne room.
When Sunset Shimmer arrived at the library, she began to look through every book for a map that could be in the books. Whether it is on a page of a book or if the map is hidden in the books.
After many hours, Sunset Shimmer was able to find a map that was hidden in the books. Sunset Shimmer smiled.
I found it!
Sunset Shimmer rolled up the map and put it in her backpack. Sunset Shimmer looked out the window and saw that it was dawn. Sunset Shimmer yawned.
I think I better go to sleep before I leave.
Sunset Shimmer left the library sleepily. Sunset Shimmer went where it had a bedroom.
Twilight Sparkle and Spike were eating pancakes in the dining room until they heard a knock on the door.
The door opened revealing Gallus. Twilight Sparkle noticed, “Gallus, what’s up?”
“Sunset, went to sleep in a room. I could see the tiredness on your face”, replied Gallus.
“Let her sleep, Gallus. I believe she spent the whole night in the library”, said Twilight Sparkle.
Gallus bowed, “If that’s what you want, I’ll obey”, said Gallus, before leaving and closing the door.
Twilight Sparkle and Spike ate the pancakes again. Twilight Sparkle was thinking about after eating check Sunset Shimmer to see if Sunset was sleeping.
After Twilight and Spike finished eating, Twilight left the dining room and headed for the bedroom. But there were so many rooms she didn’t even know where to look, “Gallus!”
Gallus headed toward Twilight before bowing, “yes, your majesty?”
“Do you know which room Sunset is sleeping in?” asked Twilight Sparkle. Spike was beside her.
“Yes. Follow me”, replied Gallus, before leading the way to the bedroom.
“Sunset Shimmer passed you very tired?” asked Twilight Sparkle.
“Yes. It was as if she was spending all night in the library”, replied Gallus.
Twilight, knowing Sunset Shimmer, knew that Sunset was determined and wouldn’t give up until she got what she wanted. That is, Sunset wouldn’t give up until she found the map, “maybe she actually spent the whole night in the library”
It didn’t take long for them to arrive in the room where Sunset Shimmer was, “this is the room where I saw Sunset come in”, said Gallus.
Twilight Sparkle propped his hull on the door before opening the door a little and seeing Sunset Shimmer lying on the bed. Sunset was covered to the neck. Twilight Sparkle closed the door with her magic. She looked at Spike and Gallus, “let’s let her sleep”
Spike and Gallus agreed.
When the next day came, Sunset Shimmer woke up. She felt the sun on her face. She got out of bed and grabbed her backpack. She checked to see if she had everything in her backpack she saw her yellow lizard named Ray in the backpack, “Hi Ray. Did you sleep well?”
In response, Ray was silent, “I’ll take that as a yes”
Sunset Shimmer took Ray out of her backpack and put him on her back, “Let’s see Princess Twilight, Ray”
Sunset Shimmer went toward the door, opened it with a hoof, left the room and closed the door with her magic. That done, she went as far as she believed where Twilight Sparkle was.
Twilight Sparkle and Spike were in the dining room, eating pancakes, until they heard a knock, “come in”
The door opened, revealing Sunset Shimmer, “ah. Hi sunset. Did you sleep well?” said Twilight Sparkle while smiling
Sunset Shimmer smiled back, “yes, Twilight”
As Sunset Shimmer approached, Twilight noticed a slat on the back of Sunset Shimmer, “Sunset, you have a lizard on its back”
“It’s my pet lizard. His name is Ray”, Sunset Shimmer replied as she headed toward the table.
“Where did you get him?” asked Twilight Sparkle.
“In the human world”, said Sunset Shimmer, now sitting at the table.
“By the way, are you going back to the human world?” asked Twilight Sparkle.
“No, Twilight”, Sunset Shimmer replied.
Twilight Sparkle was surprised, “but why not?”
“My counterpart appeared”, Sunset Shimmer replied.
“Oh. So are you staying here in Equestria now?” asked Twilight Sparkle just to be sure.
“Yes, Twilight,” answered Sunset Shimmer. “And I plan to travel looking for Celestia”
“You already told me that, Sunset. Before you go, do you have everything you need?”
“Yes, Twilight”, Sunset Shimmer replied.
“So, good luck”, said Twilight Sparkle.
Sunset Shimmer smiled, “thank you”, Sunset Shimmer approached Twilight Sparkle and hugged her. Spike watched.
When they left the hug, Sunset Shimmer knew it was time for her to say goodbye, “Well, I’m going. Bye”
“Goodbye Sunset”, Twilight Sparkle said goodbye.
Sunset Shimmer before going decided to ask, “Is it okay if I get some breakfast while I go to the train?”
Twilight Sparkle smiled, “Of course, Sunset”
Sunset Shimmer smiled before grabbing a piece of pancake and walking toward the outside of the castle while eating the pancake.
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Oh it's so strange that Celestia and Luna don't govern Canterlot anymore. I will miss them.
9823181
Me too
It is not right, that it ended this way.
They could do at least one other season.
However, nice chapter ❣
9823199
Yeah
9823202
Thanks
You seem to pick some very interesting concepts for your stories, but there is also a certain hastiness and lack of polish in your writing. I will just say that your tenses require work, your sentences are often stunted or lack structure.
For example, the sentences I quoted above could be rendered as:
Like I said, you have great ideas. I think you just need practice in sentence structuring. Try taking two sentences and combining them in different configurations. Another thing you could do is watch (good) television and movies and try to copy the dialogue there, to get a handle on natural speech patterns. And I would always encourage writers to read more books. We are as magpies! We steal from better authors than ourselves and make shiny nests of literature.
And as always, good luck!
I wanted to thank you for adding this story to my group, ‘Little Ray.’
10271529
You're welcome