Tales from the Second Age of Magic

by VeganSpyro97

Chapter 6: Farmyard Foolery

Two weeks into Crimson’s stay at Sweet Apple Acres, and the Architect was already proving to be a capable worker, taking orders well, listening to the Apples advice on harvesting techniques and absorbing knowledge about which apples should be sold and which would be given to the hogs on the farm.

Applejack had warmed to him rather quickly, easing him into work with jokes and quips to get him laughing at the odd techniques they used to harvest their crops of apples. Of course, with such pleasant company, he’d offered jokes of his own very early on as well.

His favourite moment had occurred on the very first day of work, just after he had arrived.

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Applejack had brought him out to orchard early in the morning, joined by her brother, her sister, and by Static, who apparently worked as daytime farmhand.

“Alrighty y’all. Apple Bloom, Big Mac, Ah’d like ya ta meet Crimson. He’s gonna be workin’ on the farm for a while, so play nice.” She said, introducing the two Apples. “Mac there’s my older brother, and Bloom is my li’l sister.”

“Good to meet you.” Crimson said, bowing his head politely.

“Likewise.” Mac nodded politely, a piece of straw hanging from his teeth.

“Good ta meetcha!” Apple Bloom happily chirped.

“Right, now Crimson, have y’all ever bucked a tree before?”

Crimson blinked, looking at the mare incredulously, not quite sure he’d heard her right.

“Come again?”

“Have ya ever bucked a tree before?”

“Bucked a tree? Why, I’ve never even kissed a girl!” He protested, holding up his hands with a grin.

Static and Mac snorted, hooves flying to their mouths at the response.

“Nah, Sugarcube, it’s easy. Here, look, I’ll show ya.”

Crimson blinked again, then turned aghast, to Big Mac, eyes wide. “Are you sure the kid should watch?”

Static was sweating from the effort of holding in her laughter, and Mac’s upper lip was quivering.

Applejack rolled her eyes, moving over to the closest tree. “Here, it’s real simple.”

Crimson quickly moved over to a grinning Apple Bloom and covered her eyes. “Don’t look.”

Static lost it, giving in to her cackling whilst Mac fell over, huge guffaws echoing through the trees.

“Very funny, guys.” AJ deadpanned.

“You should at least let me ask the tree out on a date first!” Crimson added.

Static’s laughter only grew louder when Rainbow Dash fell out of the tree next to Applejack, giggling and crowing with laughter, having heard every word.

*****************************************

Crimson and Big Mac, being strong and well built individuals, had quickly struck up a friendly rapport, starting a competition to see who could “buck” the most apples in a day. Of course, not having hooves, the word “buck” was only loosely applied to Crimson. He’d lost every day so far.

His time in the desert had not been as labour intensive as this, but he certainly did not like how hot the sun was here. It beat down on him while he worked, making some days intolerable. Other days, thanks to the cloud cover provided by the Pegasi, were made much nicer and less awful in terms of heat.

That was something he would have to get used to. Seeing the Pegasi pushing around rainclouds like they were carts was not something he had ever expected to see. His old friends had not had the time to show off such feats, so he had no prior experience to draw on. He knew the science behind clouds, knew how they were made in the wild places of the world, where no magic but their own directed them to form. In short, it was a thrilling experience to see it for himself.

That the sun and moon were moved by magic, no matter what Twilight said, was something he did not believe. They were massive celestial bodies, after all. No amount of magic could move things that big.

One of the other ponies who he had begun to form a friendly connection with was Static. Of all of them, she was the one who seemed most comfortable with his appearance, never once having to guess his mood, since she could read his more subtle emotional cues with ease. And working closely with the mare did help.

As work finished up for the day, on the second day of his third week, Crimson saw Static swooping in for a landing, looking quite pleased when she was able to stick it without tripping over her own hooves. He liked her, but he knew there were things she wasn’t telling him.

The mare in question had had to run up to the capital city of Canterlot for something or other involving her teacher, and as such, hadn’t been at work at all that day.

From her behaviour, Crimson guessed Static had previously been somewhat of a shut-in, obsessed with fantasies- hence why she kept referring to him as an elf- and not having much experience with exercise and interactions with other people. Why else would she find everything so interesting, or meet every day with such exuberance? Or be busily trying to work off a layer of pudge she insisted hadn’t been there until a month ago? Or struggle with flying, and constantly be muttering about how ‘feathers are weird’, whenever she ended up eating dirt.

“Hi Crimson! Hi Mac!” She called, coming to a canter out of her landing. “You guys all finished up for the day?”

Big Mac took a moment to answer her, using his voice for something other than one word responses for a change. “We sure are. You and Shy coming over for dinner tomorrow?”

“Yessir!” Static chirped, giving Mac a silly grin and a salute. “Dinner with friends is almost always better than just being alone! We’re planning on bringing Rose, Zeph and Aster too, if that’s okay?”

“Eeyup!” Mac returned, going back to his singular affirmations again.

“Sweet! So, got some spare time, Crimson? Twilight asked me if you were up for some more tests.”

“Oh, uh sure thing.” Twilight had been adamant on studying Crimson. She had asked after his potential free time every day, but he had only actually had two days during which he had any free time at all. During those times, Twilight had been measuring…..something, using all kinds of devices that Crimson had no idea what they were for. Not to mention that they looked equal halves professionally built and cobbled together from what she could find- including one machine that utilized an old and possibly unwashed Colander for a helmet- around her enormous abode. The Colander seemed to be a sore point for Spike, her assistant and adopted brother, as he was in charge of the kitchens, and didn’t like her swiping his appliances for her science experiments.

“Cool. She should be here any-”

In a flash of light, the mare in question appeared, looking no worse for wear after having casually traversed time and space in an instant.

“Minute.” Static finished, brightly. “Heya Twi.”

“Hi again.” Twilight greeted the chipper Pegasus before turning to Crimson. “And hello Crimson.”

“Hello Twilight.” Crimson greeted, amicably. “Got some more puzzles for me to solve? Or are we just measuring things again?”

“Measuring. I’d like to go over your height again, as well as body weight, metabolism rates, cell loss and replenishment, and a few other things. It shouldn’t take long.”

“Greeeeaaat….” Static droned. “And why did you want me here?”

“Note taker. Spike’s busy today, and you have decent hoof writing.”

Static leveled a flat stare at her friend. “You could have asked Rarity.”

“Every time I need her to write, she always uses super fancy and stylised writing! Who uses calligraphy to write shopping lists, anyway?”

“Rarity. She is a fabulous mother-bucker.” Static stated, without batting an eye, earning her a grin from Crimson and another line mouthed look from Twilight.

“Here.” Twilight said, dumping several sheets of paper on the grinning pegasus via teleport with a smirk. “You can write on these, with this.” A fancy looking quill dropped onto Static’s head.

Static picked the papers up and regarded the quill with a raised eyebrow. “Did you modify this with an internal inkwell?”

“Yep. Inspired by those pens I kept seeing on Earth.” Twilight nodded, a hint of pride in her voice. “They really are useful, but mine’s better.”

“How?”

“One word. Refillable.”

“Ah.”

Crimson raised a hand. “Uh, question. What’s Earth?”

The two mares flung up their wings, and he caught the dull murmurs of whispered words coming from behind the feathery appendages, before they popped back up.

“We’ll explain later. For now, onto the studying?”

“But-”

“STUDYING!” Twilight crowed, happily trotting in place. “Alright, Static, take note!”

“Aye aye, captain!”

Twilight started popping in different bits and pieces of measuring equipment, some as simple as a long stick of wood marked in units of length, (most notably inches and hands, funnily enough) to a hoofheld machine which seemed to be growing an entire bush made of wires from the top, and, while intact, seemed to have no idea what the word “neat” referred to.

Thus began a three hour long session of Twilight measuring the lengths and ratios of his body, mapping out proportions and getting an accurate depiction of his anatomy...except for certain areas where not even her science driven brain dared venture, which made Static grin at her and waggle her eyebrows knowingly. This action of course annoyed the purple alicorn to no end, since if Static was busy making fun of her sense of privacy and her prudish tendencies, then the pegasus was most certainly not keeping up with the note-taking.

Twilight took over the note-taking, her temporary assistant finding it difficult to do so after being teleported over Sweet Apple Acres pond for her jibes.

Static trotted past them on the way to the front gate, smiling sweetly at Twilight- a look which informed the mare that she had basically just started a war with the pegasus.

When Twilight was done, the Apples had gone and had dinner already, so Twilight offered to take him back to the castle for a meal that wasn’t almost entirely centered on apples.

The walk to Ponyville town wasn’t one that Crimson had made much yet, though he was already finding some more open and accepting reactions.

“So, which house is yours, Twilight?” Crimson asked.

“House?” Twilight stopped for a moment, looking up at the Architect, momentarily befuddled, before she realized something. “Oh, uh….you see, I don’t live in a normal house….”

Crimson frowned, tilting his head slightly. “Do you live in that place that looks like it was made of baked goods?”

“Oh, no. That’s Sugarcube Corner, the local bakery. The Cakes, and my friend Pinkie live their.”

“Oh, your ‘exciteble’ friend. So...you live in that place?”

“Nope. That’s Rarity’s shop, the Carousel Boutique.” Twilight said with a chuckle.

“I should thank her properly for the clothes. She must have worked hard on them.” Crimson scratched his head, looking around. “So, where do you live then?”

Twilight smiled, and reached up with a hoof to turn his head so he was looking right at it. “There. That’s where I live.”

Crimson’s mouth fell open at the sight of the massive, crystal structure. “You live there?!”

“Uh huh. I had problems adjusting back when I first got it, but now that more people are starting to visit, it’s starting to feel a lot more like a home than a castle.” Twilight grinned.

It was then that Crimson recalled a certain bit of information that had slipped from his mind since he had first learned of it. “You’re an Alicorn.”

“Yes. I am.” Twilight said, sounding confused as to where this train of thought was going.

“Alicorn’s are Princesses.”

Twilight nodded, gravely. “Yes.”

“You’re THAT Twilight?!” Crimson’s face was trying to play catch up with his emotions, bewilderment and shock flashing across his face. “I thought you were just a- oh…..I need a moment….”

“Crimson? If it helps, I don’t want you to act like I’m someone special. I hate all the ‘Your Highnesses’ and ‘Thank you Princess’-ing that everyone does.” Twilight moved to stand in front of him, and offered him her hoof. “Please. Just think of me as your friend.”

Crimson looked down at the Alicorn before him, with her hoof outstretched to him, stared into her deep, purple eyes, and saw a vulnerability, a strange sort of, underlying, despair.

“I don’t have many ponies- or any other creatures for that matter- who still treat me the same as I used to be before I was a Princess.” She looked sadly down. “Not even my closest friends can say they didn’t at least start to do it, when I first earned my wings. They’ve gotten better now...but it’s still not quite the same….The only ones who didn’t treat me differently, even for a little while, after they learned I was a Princess are my brother Shining, my Sister-in-Law Cadence and Static. Although, Static’s only ever known me as a Princess and usually just says it to annoy me, but at least she doesn’t care that much about it an-”

Twilight stopped, and looked down at her hoof, and the fingers wrapped around it in a mangled, yet well meaning attempt at a hoof shake.

“Stop talking Twilight.” Crimson said with a smile. “You’ll just get yourself all worked up and freak out.”

Twilight’s eyes went wide, before she threw herself at Crimson in a hug that wrapped all her limbs around his legs. “Oh, thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!!! You have no idea how much that means to me!!” Realizing what she was doing, and seeing the surprised and embarrassed blush on Crimson’s face, Twilight quickly hopped back, waving her hoof at her face and failing miserably at not overreacting to her silly behaviour. “I’m so sorry, I don’t- uh, usually do that, and- uh, we should, probably go get some food- or something.”

Crimson chuckled, amused at the bookworm’s rapid-fire, broken sentences. “You had me at food, Twilight. I’m starving.”

“Oh, great! Let’s get on over to my castle and get something right now! Before I freak out again!” Twilight said, nearly manic, as she started dragging him along with her magic.

Crimson watched her as she trotted ahead for a while, before he shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets and letting her drag him along, leaving two furrows in the dirt where his feet ran through the dirt road. He started chuckling again when Twilight slammed the doors on him by accident, leaving him outside for a few seconds before the doors opened again and she sheepishly asked him to come inside.

Rolling his eyes, the Architect just rolled with it. Hey, never turn down free food, right?

****************************************************

Author's Note:

“You said it!!”
“Gah! Pinkie! Get out of my room!”
“This is your room? Ooops, sooooorrrrryyyyy!!! Carry on!”
“Okay, now back to- HEY, GIMME BACK MY KEYBOARD!!”
“But I wanna press all the buttons!!”
“No, Pinkie, bad! Bad Pinkie! Bad party horse!”
“Oh, is this a toy of me? That’s so funny, my flank is covered in balloons!”
“PINKIE!!!”
“Well at least I-DSFFDIF,GJFKffkgckytektdeGCFKYTJ,F-------”

Comments

[Gargon94]

I like how Static tunts Twilight playfully. It's very amusing.