My Little Old Republic: The Smuggler and the Thief

by AidanMaxwell

Part 2

Lemon Drop awoke the following morning with a slight headache. He’d slept upright in his metal chair, letting the lady have the proper bed and opting not to share it with her. Even if he was a dirty, no-good, lowlife thief, he respected mares enough to not sleep with them. Just a courtesy. Besides, after today, his life was going to get much better; he might be able to afford his own bed and legally buy it. Maybe settle down with a mare of his own.

He stirred from his seat and looked toward the bed. Pinkie Pie was sprawled out across the bedsheets, her head thrown back onto the pillow. Her rear leg twitched every now and again, and she snored softly through her slightly agape mouth. On the bedpost, her hat, vest and belt hung together to form a clump of barely dry clothes. At the sound of him moving, her large blue eyes fluttered open and she licked her lips before looking at him groggily.

“Oh, hey Lemony,” she whispered. With a stretch and a yawn, she leaped out of the bed and touched her bundled clothes. A frown creeped onto her face and she furrowed her brow. “Aww, they’re still wet.”

“I do have clothes I could let you use,” he reminded her with a smile.

Pinkie turned to face the dresser and looked at the overflowing drawers. “Okie dokie! What do you have in my size?” She yanked the drawer completely out and sifted through the unfolded, wrinkled mess, looking for something suitable to wear. Clothes went flying as she digged, some nearly smacking Lemon in the face. He shielded himself from the onslaught of cloth by throwing his hooves up in front of his head, but as he did, the sound of digging stopped. When he looked again, Pinkie was dressed in a tight polyester t-shirt and athletic shorts that complimented her rear end just a little too much.

“Wow, Pinkie,” Lemon said with a blush, “don’t you think that’s... a bit... I don’t know...”

“Do you think it’s modest enough?” she asked, tilting her head. “I feel like it’s hugging me a little too tight, but I couldn’t find anything else in the dresser that fit me well—”

“It isn’t.”

Pinkie froze, her mouth still agape, trying to sound out the word on the tip of her tongue. Lemon looked away and blushed a little harder.

“Wait, it isn’t?” Pinkie echoed. “Is it bothering you?”

“A little.”

“Lemony, are you... like... gay?”

“What?!” Lemon jumped in place and turned back to Pinkie, his face an obvious, deep red. “N-no, no I’m not! I don’t have anything against ponies who are, but I’m definitely not.”

“Then what’s the problem?” Pinkie asked quietly, almost in a whisper. She trotted up to Lemon and rubbed her tail across his face seductively, to which he reacted by standing completely motionless and remaining silent. “Don’t you like what you see, big boy?”

“Too much so, milady.”

“What a gentlecolt!” she exclaimed, bumping him playfully with her rump. “You’re so funny, Mr. Lemon. Okie dokie, if you don’t want me to dress like this, I’ll find something more modest.”

“Why would you want to dress like that, though?” he asked with a pleading glance at her hind end as she walked by, mesmerised. “I mean, not that I, you know, don’t like it or anything—”

“Sometimes you go to extremes to get what you want,” she answered, giggling at how badly Lemon was stumbling over himself. “It’s part of the nature of my job. I once had to wear a dancer’s outfit for a Hutt, just so I could trick him into trusting me. Then, when he was sleeping, I snuck into his private chambers and planted some weapons for his guards, who were actually bounty hunters in disguise. I didn’t stick around for the bad part, but I can imagine how it went.”

By the time Lemon worked up the resolve to look away, Pinkie had changed into her wet clothes. She was making her way to the ladder when she took notice of Lemon, who was still absently staring at the wall. In an instant, she was by his side, poking him in the chest with her hoof.

“Hey, thanks for being honest, though. I do appreciate it.” When it didn’t rouse his attention, she bumped him with her rump again. After a brief pause, a smile broke across his face, and he returned the gesture playfully. “Hah! We’re gonna be good friends, you and I! I can feel it.”

The smile faded from Lemon’s face as Pinkie started for the ladder again. A pang of guilt seared through his soul, causing him to grit his teeth as his eyes twitched shut.

“Whatever you say, lady.”

-~-~-~-~-~

“So, lemme get this straight,” Rainbow Dash interrupted, “you’re saying he wanted to steal your ship and your money?”

“Yepperoonie! That’s exactly what I’m saying.” Pinkie stood up and walked over to the door of the cargo hold, reaching into the hallway with her hoof. A scream of shock sounded from somewhere else on the ship, then Pinkie pulled her hoof back. She had Lemon by the collar of his shirt, a soapy, wet sponge and a half-cleaned plate still in his hooves. He looked up at the two soldiers and nodded, as though this was only half unexpected. “Tell ‘em, Lemony!”

“Tell ‘em what?” he asked impatiently.

“That you wanted to steal my ship!”

“Yeah, that’s right. I followed Pinkie in the hopes that I could start a new life with her ship and her winnings from that night.”

“Well, did you?” Dash asked, also impatient.

“Obviously not, Sergeant,” Twilight interjected. “They wouldn’t be together if he had.”

“Together?” Dash echoed. He turned to Lemon and Pinkie. “Wait, are you two together?”

Both ponies blushed and looked away from each other, answering “No!” in unison.

Twilight slammed her hoof against her face. “I meant, together as partners in crime, Dash, not partners in romance.”

“Well, what happened, then?!” Dash yelled, throwing her hooves up in exasperation.

-~-~-~-~-~

The Coruscant sun beat down on Pinkie Pie as she crawled from the abandoned storm drain, instantly feeling its heat start to dry her still-damp clothes. Ponies of all colors and types were busily walking, trotting, and running up the nearby promenade, ignoring her completely as they made their way toward their destinations. Even though the majority of the traffic was pedestrian, every so often a speeder would zip by, and every time one did, Pinkie ducked to try and avoid being seen.

Lemon emerged behind her a short time after, holding a briefcase in his teeth. “Youf forgot shomefing,” he spat through the handle.

“Oh, my case!” Pinkie reached out for it gingerly, but retracted her hooves with a scrunched face. “Umm, can you carry it for me? That way, if I get caught, at least they don’t get my winnings too.”

“Shure fing,” he replied all too happily, slinging the case onto his back. Of course he could carry the briefcase with the money in it. Without revealing his glee, he looked back at Pinkie and gave her an even glare. “So, where to, lady?”

“Stop calling me lady,” Pinkie snapped. “It makes me feel old, or something.”

“You can’t be younger than me,” Lemon said with a shrug. “I thought it was just a courtesy to call mares older than you something... respectful.”

“I...” Pinkie bit her lip, then reached over to Lemon’s face and pulled him close. She whispered something in his ear, which caused his eyes to widen.

“Seriously? You’re not much younger than me...” His cheeks turned red again. “That’s... embarrassing. I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay! It’s okay! Just, no more of the ‘lady’ thing, okay? We’re friends!”

“Right... So, Pinkie, where are we headed?”

“Ummmmmmmm...” She scanned her surroundings to see if the hangar she’d landed in was nearby, but she didn’t recognize where she was at all. “I don't know where I am... but I'm parked in the Old Galactic Market.”

“Oh, we're not that far from there,” Lemon said as he started for the promenade. “A short speeder ride, maybe five minutes—”

“A speeder?” Pinkie echoed. “Where will we get a speeder?”

Lemon pointed to himself with a hoof. “Thief, remember?”

“Oh, yeah!” She bounced after him as Lemon led the way down the path, weaving between the ponies in the crowd that both moved with and against them. Skyscrapers and bright neon signs occupied that district of Coruscant, giving it a true cityscape feel that wasn't as obvious down in the Undercity. It was in that moment that Pinkie realized she had swam up to the upper ring of the city, where daytime was the more active time of day. “I don't see the true city all that often. It's beautiful...”

“Don't come here often, I take it?” Lemon asked as he weaved into an alley just off the promenade. It led to a small parking lot where a few speeders were parked, some of which had their owners still sitting inside them.

“No, not really,” Pinkie replied as she jumped aside to dodge a pedestrian on her way to the lot. “I don't live on Coruscant, and when I do come here, I usually go straight to the undercity.”

“It's real nice up here. A little rich for my blood, perhaps.” Lemon touched his hoof against an unoccupied speeder and, when an intruder alarm didn't sound, jumped into the driver's seat. “Cover me while I hotwire this.”

“Okie dokie lokie!”

The sound of a plate being ripped off the front of the speeder's steering mechanism meant Lemon was working, which Pinkie tried to make look less conspicuous by leaning against the side of the craft and looking around absently, like she was waiting for somepony. “So, while we're not busy—”

“Excuse me?”

“—I was wondering, why did you think I was older than you?”

“I didn't want to believe somepony so young and pretty was doing something as seedy as smuggling for a living. I mean, you could do anything in the galaxy with your skillset.”

“Why is that so hard to believe?” Pinkie leaned over the side of the speeder and glared down at Lemon curiously. “Am I weak? Is that what you’re saying?”

Lemon looked up at her to reply and stopped short, letting his mouth hang open. Her luminously large, blue eyes seemed to gaze into his very soul. Her puffy pink mane eclipsed the sun and brightened her face to a point that she seemed to glow like an angel. Awestruck, Lemon just stared at her.

She tried to wave a hoof in front of his eyes, but it didn’t yield any results. “Uh, Lemon?”

He snapped back to reality and shook his head, blushing slightly. “Huh? What was I saying?”

“You were saying I was weak...”

“I never said that!” he replied indignantly. “I used the word ‘young,’ I believe.”

“But what does my age have to do with my work?”

“It just seems dangerous, is all! You’re alone in the galaxy, doing very risky jobs.”

“Well, yeah,” Pinkie replied, nodding slowly, “but it’s good money.”

“I do like good money,” Lemon said with a laugh. “I’m not sure if I could ever smuggle or play cards for good money, though. Seems like too much risk. As though your current situation isn’t an indicator of that.”

“You’re young, too. And my work is no less dangerous than being a thief, Mr. Lemon.”

“Touché.” At that moment, the speeder roared to life as Lemon bypassed the security systems and started it up. He sat up in the driver’s seat and patted the passenger side with his hoof indicatively. “One taxi to the Old Galactic Market.”

-~-~-~-~-~

Pinkie’s face lit up like a light. Overjoyed to be on her way back to her ship, she leaped over the side of the speeder and plopped down into the seat beside Lemon. The leather upholstery hugged her damp clothes warmly, heated by exposure to the morning sun. It was a comfortable warmth, like being hugged by a close friend.

As the speeder lifted off and sped into traffic, the rush of wind against her body gave Pinkie chills. With the heated seat juxtaposing the brisk air, she felt an odd sensation of both calming warmth and exhilarating cold. She wrapped her hooves together and huddled down to use the windshield as a wind shield. The irony caused her to giggle, eliciting a confused look from her driver.

“Thanks for the ride, by the way,” Pinkie said cheerfully.

“Don’t thank me yet,” Lemon said slowly, looking around as he flew. “There’s still a bounty on you, so there’s a good chance your ship has not gone unnoticed.”

“I’ll think of something,” she replied. “It’s my ship, after all. I’m not letting somepony have it without a fight.”

Lemon shuddered. “Yes, well, we still need to get there, so let’s focus on flying and—”

Two black speeder bikes zipped into the traffic lane just ahead of them. In the seats of both bikes sat a pair of armored ponies, one of whom was driving while the other held a long rifle over the side, aiming at the incoming hijacked speeder. Lemon swerved to the left and dove down, out of the traffic, just as two bolts loosed into the air and missed. The shots nearly grazing Pinkie’s mane as they dropped down, scorching the tailgate of the speeder. Grasping her hat, she looked frantically at Lemon, who had his eyes firmly locked on the space ahead of them.

“Lemon!” she cried as the speeder dipped toward the undercity. “What about my ship?”

“Do you wanna die before we get there?” he yelled.

“No, not really!”

“Then shut up and let me drive!”

Out of the corner of her eye, Pinkie saw the two bikes dip down to pursue them. The ponies on the back, still pointing their weapons at her, fired a volley of shots onto the fleeing speeder. As the shots poured down on them, Pinkie reached to her belt and whipped out her own pair of guns, returning fire as best as she could. Lemon wasn’t helping her aim, however, as he jerked the speeder into evasive maneuvers that forced her to hold onto her seat belt.

A sudden banked turn put Lemon and Pinkie’s speeder into an access tunnel, where oncoming traffic dived and swerved to get out of their way. One bike followed them in while the other zipped by.

“Lemon?!” Pinkie cried again, firing a shot over the seat at the pursuing bike. “They’re gonna try and race us to the end!”

“How good a shot are you?”

“Pretty good, I think.”

“Then worry about the ones behind us and stop worrying about the ones you can’t shoot!”

Pinkie stuck her tongue out at him and took aim, grimacing. “Geez, just trying to help.” She loosed a pair of bolts at the enemy bike. Lemon took a dive right then to dodge an incoming taxi speeder. The lurching movement caused Pinkie Pie to miss both shots and forced her down into her seat. In the maneuver, her hat almost flew off her head. She took a moment to set it down under her legs, to hold it in place so she didn’t lose it, and also holstered one of her pistols. Then, with only one gun, she took much more careful aim, waited for the speeder to level out again, and fired a single shot.

It rang true, smacking against the helmet of the bike’s driver. The pony flipped backwards in the chair and hauled the bike’s steering handles back with him, sending it into a skyward climb. When it collided with the roof of the tunnel, a fireball erupted from the bike as the contents of the fuel tank spilled into the ignition. All that remained was two charred bounty hunters and some crumpled chunks of a speeder bike.

“Good shot,” Lemon said, looking back to check on the pursuit.

“Lemon!” Pinkie cried once more, pointing ahead. He turned to see the end of the tunnel looming closer, and sitting in the center was an identical black speeder with two more gunponies riding it. Before he could check to see if they had been spotted among the traffic, three shots barreled down the tunnel and smacked against the windshield. One pierced the glass and grazed Lemon’s shoulder. He screamed in pain and reached for his injured limb instinctively, sending the speeder into an unintentional barrel roll.

Pinkie clung to the side of the speeder as her companion continued to cry out, clutching his shoulder. The force of the spin was too great for her to reach for the steering bar with her front legs. Using every ounce of willpower, she instead pushed a kick with her hind leg through the gravity force and righted the bar, taking the speeder out of its death spin. More shots poured down the tunnel at her speeder, but she ignored them. All that was on her mind now was driving.

Jumping from her seat belt, Pinkie reached across Lemon and grabbed the steering bar. She put the speeder into a nosedive, dodging another flurry of bolts, then snaked back up again into a climb. At the speed she was going, a few seconds later, they were only a few meters from the bike. Realizing this, Pinkie shielded her face with a hoof and braced herself against her agonized driver for impact.

The speeder jerked hard as the nose connected with the side of the bike, sending the two occupants into the air. They emerged from the tunnel and plummeted the three mile drop to the lower city while the speeder, smoking, dented, and covered in blaster marks, zipped back towards the traffic lanes and disappeared into the Old Galactic Market district.

Somehow, Pinkie managed to land the speeder on a rooftop just outside the primary hangar. The first thing she did was jump out and pull Lemon from his seat, still clutching his wound like a stubborn leech. Pinkie lifted his hoof away, with great difficulty and the occasional grunt, to see that it was cauterizing around a patch of dry blood. The bolt had broken the skin, but the heat generated from the shot was actually closing the wound.

“You got very lucky, Lemony,” she whispered gently, rubbing his hoof in a therapeutic manner. “It’s gonna be okay, okie dokie?”

“Aaaaagh, it burns sooooo bad,” he moaned, his eyes forced shut in pain.

“Shhhh, it’s alright. You’re not bleeding, and it’s not serious.” Pinkie put a hoof on his good shoulder and tugged gently, as if urging him to sit up. When he tried, he let out a scream that made her blood curdle, but she didn’t let go of his back. Instead, she pulled him closer and hugged him, carefully, to avoid irritating his wound. “You’re alive...”

“Well, yeah, but I don’t wanna be,” he said through his gritted teeth. “This suuuuuucks...”

“I’m so happy...” came the gentle reply. Lemon turned his head to look at Pinkie with one eye still forced shut. She had her cheek resting on his good shoulder and she was frowning back at him. “The way you'd been screaming... I thought you'd been hurt. I got scared.”

“Nah, I'm gonna be okay.” He made a hissing noise from between his teeth. “Give me a few minutes, and after the throbbing stops, we'll walk down there, mm'kay?”

She nodded, rubbing her cheek against his shoulder.

“You alright?” he asked quietly into her ear.

“Mmhmm,” she mumbled. “I'd be dead right now without you...”

“I would be as well, Pinkie, but you saved me,” Lemon replied with a toothy smile. He hissed in pain, shutting his eyes. His hoof squeezed against his wound tighter. “I probably would've crashed that speeder if you hadn't taken over when you did.”

She didn't say anything. Instead of talking, she lifted her head and pushed gently on his good shoulder, lying him on the ground. Lemon seethed in pain as his shoulder came to rest on the rooftop shortly after his head. Pinkie then poked around his wound, eliciting a seething grunt from Lemon. Her touch was gentle, however, and when she was sure he was okay, she flicked his mane playfully while he laid there. Every time he looked up at her, she stared into his eyes intently, and giggled at him when he looked away.

“It's not fair...” Lemon whispered after a couple minutes. “You're so nice and caring, and I haven't done anything to deserve this kindness. I barely even know you.”

“You offered to help me, and you saved my life,” Pinkie replied with a giggle. “You're my friend, Lemony. I take care of my friends.”

“I'm in your debt, Ms. Pinkie Pie,” Lemon said with a grunt as he lifted himself to his hooves and stood up. He began to shudder, but Pinkie put a hoof out to stabilize him. He accepted it with a smile. “Thank you.”

“Ready to go get my ship back?”

“I'm right behind you.”

Pinkie winked at him before trotting toward the rooftop stair access. Lemon turned toward the smoldering speeder and reached inside, grabbing a briefcase with his teeth before galloping after her.

Comments

[Crimson Dawn]

Lemon and Pinkie are so cute. This story works even outside of Star Wars since in many ways the Star Wars fluff is relatively lite. I am enjoying this and hope to see more soon.

[Crimy]

Looking forward to part 3

[AidanMaxwell]

1327886
Part 3 will be the last part, unfortunately, with a very short cliffhanger epilogue. This was meant to be a very short project, just to add some flavor to my little universe with MLOR. The real juicy part happens very soon, when I introduce Rarity and AJ. The first chapter of that is already in revision, and it's a throwdown from the get-go~

[Crimy]

Oh yeah, I went ape-shit when I saw that pic by DerpiiHooves.