Vampire Love (OC)

by StoryWriter

Prologue Finale - A whole new world!

Inside the carriage

Daisy sleeping at the top bed while Winter Steelbite asleep in the bottom one. The first to wake up is Winter

Winter yawned then he open his eyes, everything seem to shake left and right a little due to the carriage movements, it was dark too because the window is closed. He slowly get out of the bed "Hmm..." he slowly open the window letting the light slowly fill his still tired eyes and he see Ponyville in a distance, he yawns again, "Daisy wake up we're almost there"

Daisy open her eyes only to be met by a sharp burning pain all over her coat exposed by the sunbeam "Ah!" she quickly cover her head in her blankets to hide from the sunlight, "Winter could you please close the window its very bright!" she said, her voice is slightly muffled by the blanket

"Sorry about that.." he close the window after that he levitate his own hair comb out of his saddle and comb his hair making it tidy again then he combs his tail

Daisy slowly get down from the bed top using the ladder then she grab her own hair comb doing the same action like Winter does, A theory came into her mind "If that talisman doesn't hurt me because I spilled my blood on it or my blood somehow managed to get the talisman to know I'm a good pony, does it mean it can protect me from sunlight as well?" she then levitate the talisman out of the drawer,tied it around her neck then she made a little test,she slowly opens the window, the light hit her skin but doesn't hurt her, "huh my theory worked!"

Winter Steelbite who finished combing his mane and tail, glanced at her, "Why are you wearing a talisman?" he asked

Daisy "Well its... It belonged to me for almost two decades and I don't want to leave it.." she replied

They heard crowd of ponies outside talking

---

Meanwhile near Ponyville Town Hall

A crowd of ponies gathered near the road while...

"OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODANEWPONYARRIVINGINPONYVILLELET'STHROWAPARYASSOONASASITARRIVES"
Pinkie Pie shouted as she's jumping around with joy (Oh my god oh my god oh my god a new pony arriving in ponyville let's throw a party as soon as it arrives)

Applejack "Woah slow down there Pinkie Pie this ain' the best time"

Twillight Sparkle roll her eyes, "Well she's just been Pinkie Pie" she remarked

Rainbow Dash "Yeah Applejack, what's wrong with Pinkie Pie going hyperactive" she added

Applejack "Ah know Pinkie Pie jus' been Pinkie Pie, But throwin' a party in these streets full of crowds?"

Twillight "I guess you're right.." she look at Pinkie Pie

Pinkie "C'mon I mean C'mon! Let me throw a party!"

Twillight "Yes but not in this street Pinkie"

Pinkie "Awwww"

Twillight chuckle at her then turn her attention toward the carriage again

As the large carriages arrives near the town hall, a creaking sound can be heard as the carriage stops at it destination. Once it stopped the carriage made a big thud as the carriage slowly fall to one side of its edge although not enough to cause any damage or sudden instability inside

Everypony near the town hall soon begin muttering something about the carriage

As Daisy and Winter trot out of the carriage,they saw the crowd of ponies and felt a little uneasy about it

Then a pink pony with bright blue eyes greeted them suddenly "HI! I'm Pinkie Pie what's yours!" Smiling Brightly

Winter "Uh..." before he could speak he is been cut off by Pinkie Pie

"Welcome to Ponyville! Are you going to stay here? If you are then I'm gonna INVITE EVERYPONY TO A PARTY TO CELEBRATE! AND ITS GONNA BE A WELCOMING PARTY FOR TWO PONIES! Ohmygosh this is going to be so exciting! You are going to make lots and lots of friends...." she kept on talking about parties,welcome wagon and a lot of things about her friends until one blue pegasus flied near and stuck her hoof in her mouth

The flying blue pony with rainbow mane and tails "Ugh Pinkie" -She remove her hoof from Pinkie mouth- "haven't we told you not to run off like that again?" sounding annoyed

Pinkie Pie "Sorry!" wasn't sounding very sorry, her face is still smiling brightly and bouncing up and down

Then two ponies arrived near the scene, their is a purple unicorn and an orange earth pony

The orange pony stepped up to the couple with one of her hoof pressed against her chest, "We're a might sorry tha' our frie-" her sentence is then cut off by the purple unicorn

Purple unicorn, "Friends Interrupted you suddenly"

Daisy the one who quickly recovered from the confusion caused said, "Well its okay.. Mind if you say why there is a crowd of ponies near the road? We felt a bit uneasy about it.."

Twillight "Well they never seen such a big carriage like this so they are quite excited to see what is coming to ponyville." She said plainly, "By the way, My name is Twillight Sparkle personal student to Princess Celestia herself and this here is my friends" Both Daisy and Winter are surprised to hear this

The crowd soon loses their excitement as some of them begin to resume their usual daily everyday life routine

Applejack "I'm Applejack by the way Nice ta' meet ya"

Rainbow Dash "I'm Rainbow Dash the fastest flier in all of equestria!" she lands on the ground after doing a short loop in the air

Pinkie Pie "AND I'm Pinkie Pie! Oops silly me I did mentioned my name already!" Suddenly she gasped, "YOU HAVEN'T MENTION YOUR NAME!" she nearly shouted, staring at them with wide eyes

Twillight Sparkle "Right... So what is your name?"

Daisy "My name is Daisy and this stallion here is called Winter Steelbite"

Winter "Hi"

Twillight Sparkle "Welcome to Ponyville, I hope you and your Coltfriend will enjoy your stay here"

Daisy blushed while looking away embarrassingly, while Winter blushed with one of his hoof rubbing the back of his neck

Rainbow Dash "Anyway nice to meet both of you I uh.. Want to get back to my home and practice.." She fly toward her home probably wanting to read the Daring Do series, Twillight Sparkle roll her eyes

A light grayish amber pony trot out from the town hall,hearing news about a carriage came into town she came out to investigate. She glances around her town hall, seeing two new visitors including the unusually large carriage, she go and greets them, "Hello"

Daisy and Winter almost saying in Unison "Hello"

Twllight Sparkle "Hello Mayor" As the couple heard the word Mayor they immediately consider her as the town councillor

Mayor "And these new ponies are?"

Twillight "Daisy" she points at Daisy, "And this is Winter Steelbite" she points at Winter

Mayor "Nice to meet you two, and I hope you will enjoy your stay here in our village and if you have any question about this village don't be afraid to ask."

Winter "I have a question, Are there any house for rent?"

Mayor touches her chin while thinking, "...I don't think we have any house for rent.. But there is some abandoned house near Sweet Apple Acres I wouldn't mind giving it away for free"

Winter "How many bits does it cost to repair the building?"

As the Mayor was about to say the repair cost Applejack managed to blurted out, "Mah Family can help, we will ge' that building back up ta its hoof lickety split! Free of charge!"

Winter feeling rather surprised at the sudden offer, "Wow... Thanks for the offer, mind if you lead the way for me?"

Applejack "Sure thing sugarcube" she begin to lead the way as Winter starts to follow her but before they can however...

"OH OH ME PICK ME! PICK ME!" Pinkie Pie blurted out

Applejack "Fine.." "This is gonna be one noisy trip.."

Pinkie Pie "ALLLRIGHT!!" she almost shouted, "Winter!" bouncing up and down beside him

Winter "Um.. Yes?" with a confused look on his face

Pinkie Pie "What's your favourite food? We had lots and lots of food we had apple pie,cupcakes,chocolate,apples,carrots...."
she kept on talking, after Winter answered her question she begin to question about drinks, soon they gone out of Daisy earshot range

Mayor "Daisy do you have any question?"

Daisy "Um.. Yes, I am a magician but for that I might need your help Mayor"

Mayor "Well.. I guess it wouldn't hurt to see some amazing magic trick of yours!"

Twillight Sparkle "Then I hope you are better than that last magician that came into our town" she added

Daisy "And who may that magician maybe if I may ask?" sounding slightly curious

Twillight "Oh you don't want to know about it.." she smile sheepishly

Daisy "Right.. So Mayor I might need a stage... Is there any wide open fields?" she asked

Mayor stroke her chin, thinking up of a location for the magician to use, "Well.. There is a schoolhouse that has a large field which we could use to build your stage in"

Daisy "Okay schoolhouse it is then, Also I would like to perform my magic tricks at night time"

Mayor "Very well then, I have one question to ask. Are you performing today?"

Daisy "The next day"

Mayor "Great now we just need to set up a stage and tell Foal Free Press about it"

Twillight "I will tell Cheerilee about it" She begin trotting toward the schoolhouse

Mayor "Thank you Twillight Sparkle"

Daisy suddenly felt bloodthristy, her vision changed from normal to red and black, "And I will go and explore the town and maybe get familiar with it.." she quickly turn around and trot toward her carriage

Mayor "Sure thing Daisy just take your time!" she then turn around, trotting back to her town hall

As soon as daisy got back into the carriage she slowly shut the doors and closes the windows slowly. Her iris looks completely black, "Blood.. Where is the blood bags!" she quickly open the drawers and levitated a blood bag from it, she bite off the lid and starts to drink it. After a few moments she finished drinking the blood bag entirely and slowly her eyes changes back to normal again,she heaved a heavy sigh of relieve as the blood frenzy evaporated, later she checked her blood supply, "Let's see.." she levitated all of her blood bags out the drawers, four empty blood bags with some bite marks on them and two full blood bags "I guess I really need more blood..."

Her conscience told her, "Look on the bright side its only take a week for you to get thirsty for blood!"

She thought out, "Well unless if you actually work really hard or getting too many injuries that could make you get thirsty quicker" she told her head back as she put her 'Food' back into the drawers

She trot out of her carriage, soon she came up with one thing, a magician costume for her stage performance. She look around only managed to see a sign that has a dress symbol on it which is the Carousel Boutique, she trot towards it and as soon as she came in..

the pony in white with purple mane said, "Welcome to Carousel Boutique, Where every garment is sheet,unique and magnifique"

(I don't even know what she said in her last word in episode 19 season 1 But I discovered rarity can actually speak in french a little cause she said magnifique instead of magnificent)

Daisy "Thanks, I would like to request a magician cape and a magician hat"

White pony "Oh dear.. I'm afraid I don't have it" she said in a slightly shocked manner

Daisy "Oh.. Well maybe I wil-"

White pony "Oh Nonono My dear, I may not have them but I can make them!" she happily said

Daisy "Well I don't want to-"

White pony "I insist I will make them for you and I will not take no for an answer!"

Daisy "Okay then.."

White pony "Great! Also I had a question or two for you"

Daisy "What is it then?"

White pony "What colour do you like and what kind of shape do you want them to be?"

Daisy "Um... A colour that is like the Night blue sky? And I just want them to be simple.." she felt unsure what she should said

Rarity "Now I got my work cut out for me!" She felt like something is missing then she remembered, "Oh yes I almost forgot what is your name? My name is Rarity"

Daisy "My name is Daisy"

Rarity "Nice to meet you Daisy, Your dress will be finished tomorrow so don't forget to come by and pick them up!" she then trot upstairs planning new designs that is churning in her head

Daisy "Don't worry I will!" she trot out of the shop then Pinkie Pie instantly appeared in front of her, she blinked twice feeling quite surprised at the sudden appearance but managed to recover from the shock quickly thanks to the vampiric powers she had

Pinkie Pie "Hi again! Here an Invitation!" she hand over an invitation card and just as Daisy levitate the invitation from her hoof, Pinkie Pie sped off sending invitation to other ponies

Daisy magically open the invitation card and levitate a paper that is inside it, she reads the paper "You are invited to Sugarcube Corner to Celebrate Two-New-Ponies-Arrived-In-Ponyville-Party?" she feel confused and felt like laughing but still she keeps on reading, without reading out loud, "Maybe I should go to the party.. And at night time?" as she finished reading the letter

Pinkie Pie came back near the Carousel Boutique door, "Oops I forgot to send an invitation to Rarity!" she slip the invitation card into the mail slot then she sped off again

Daisy giggled, "She's so eccentric" she look at the sky, seeing the sun is almost setting on the horizon, "Oh well better go to Sugarcube Corner... But where is it exactly?" she reads the invitation again looking for the address

CMC (Cutie Mark Crusader) scooted along the road

Scootaloo looking bored while driving her scooter, "Ugh why do we have to go to Sugarcube Corner this early?" she complained

Sweetie Belle "So we could attend the party! My big sister never let me go out at night"

Apple Bloom "Yeah! Or maybe those new ponies can help us ge' our cutie marks!" she happily said

Scootaloo turn her head around facing her friends, "NO! Not cutie mark story-telling again!"

Then the scooter tripped on a large rock sending all three fillies flying into the air as if they were catapulted, "AHHH!" the CMC shouted

Daisy lifts her heads up, seeing three fillies in the air she quickly reacts to it by trying to levitate them

As they begin plummeting toward the ground the three fillies braces themselves for impact but just as they are about to hit the ground the three of them stopped in midair, wrapped in a magical aura. The CMC sighed heavily with relief, Daisy approaches them

Daisy "Are you alright little fillies?"

As the CMC glances at her, they see that the aura they are wrapped in are hers as they saw the magical aura from her horn

Apple Bloom "Thanks to you we're okay!" she blurted

Sweetie Belle "Hey we never met her before"

Scootaloo "Are you the new pony that arrived to ponyville?"

Daisy "Yes" as she slowly put the fillies back to the ground

Apple Bloom "Let us introduce ourselves, My name is Apple Bloom! And these here are mah friends!"

Sweetie Belle "I'm Sweetie Belle!"

Scootaloo "And I'm Scootaloo!"

Apple Bloom "And together!"

CMC "WE'RE THE CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!" they shouted, the shouting also disturbed some ponies near them, especially Daisy whose ears is ringing

Daisy recovering from the loud shouting they made, "Um.. Okay, My name is Daisy"

Apple Bloom "Nice ta meet ya Daisy!"

Sweetie Belle "I hope you are enjoying yourself in our village"

Daisy "Well.. I am kind of enjoying myself, I've never been in a town that is this peaceful"

Scootaloo "Oh! We could also take you for a tour around ponyville if you want! With my Scooter"

The two of her friends glances around for her scooter, when they spotted it they saw that the scooter rollers is damaged

Sweetie Belle "Um.. Scootaloo?"

Scootaloo "What is it Sweetie Belle?"

Apple Bloom "Your scooter is broken.."

Scootaloo looking at her scooter, "Oh... That scooter is quite old actually, don't worry about it, it just need a pair of new *sigh* rollers.." her expression went gloomy, been unable to buy a new scooter or even pay for the repair cost

Daisy "Oh don't worry I will buy a new scooter for you Scootaloo"

Scootaloo "Really?" she brightens up

Daisy "Of course, If I earned enough bits that is"

Scootaloo smiles brightly

Daisy "By the way can you lead me to Sugarcube Corner?"

Sweetie Belle "Sure thing!"

Apple Bloom "Just a minute!" She bites the scooter by the neck, she lift the scooter up but due to the sheer weight she wobbled around slightly. As she continues to wobble she suddenly felt the scooter weight grows lighter allowing her to stand still, she saw that the scooter is wrapped in Daisy aura, she lets go of the scooter. Daisy levitates the scooter and put it down on the wagon

Apple Bloom "Thanks Daisy"

Daisy "No problem"

Apple Bloom bite the wagon handlebar at the front and pulls it, "I'm done!" she said, her voice is slightly muffled by the handlebar in her mouth

Scootaloo "C'mon girls let's go to Sugarcube Corner!" as she leads the way to Sugarcube Corner while the others followed

---

Meanwhile in Sugarcube Corner

Inside Sugarcube Corner everything is wonderfully decorated, Balloons of different colours tied to each top corners,tables decorated with a small vase filled with flowers and of course the chocolate pony statue that is near the counter with his hoof tied to a string of balloons including the other party decorations but the only thing missing is food

Winter sitting on a chair with a table apparently daydreaming about Daisy

Pinkie Pie "Winter I'm back from sending invitation!" almost shouting, it also startled Winter

Winter "AHH!" he then accidentally bang his head against a wall, "Ow.." "Man that was such a good daydream, until I was awaken from it.. urgh"

Pinkie Pie "Are you hurt?" with a slightly worried expression from her face

Winter "I'm fine.." as he rub his head

Pinkie Pie "Oh okay then!" she smile brightly again, "But I still don't understand why you want to have this party at night time.." she give out a confused look

Winter "Well.." he's thinking about Daisy again, he sighed, "She looked so beautiful that night.."

Pinkie Pie "Wha-who..?"

Winter face gone red "I mean! I love to see the star and moon and that! I'm an astronomer!" he quickly lied

Pinkie Pie stare at him with serious looks making Winter felt a bit uncomfortable at her gaze, after a few moments, "Okie Dokie Lokie!"

Winter sighed with relief

Applejack trots through the doorway, "Winter we fixed your home"

Winter "Thanks Applejack"

Applejack "If ya need anything just ask me or mah friends"

Winter "I will remember that.." he replied plainly

Pinkie Pie "Applejack let's bake cupcakes together! This party is going to be so much FUN!" she bounce into the kitchen while still having the 'Invitation Basket' on her head

"Hehehe Slow down Pinkie Pie!" Applejack said as she trot into the kitchen in a cheerful manner

Daisy trots through the doorway "Is this Sugarcube Corner?"

Apple Bloom "Yup!" as she trot in with her friends

Winter seeing Daisy trotting through the doorway made his heart racing a little.When Daisy saw him he felt very anxious but at the same time excited as well

Winter "She's looking at me! She's looking at me! What should I do!?"

Daisy "Hi Winter" as she trot toward the table, then she sits down on one of the chairs

Winter "Hi.." he said shyly

There are a few moment of silences between them as Pinkie Pie bounces out of the kitchen with freshly baked cupcakes on her head, she puts it near a table, she then sped into the kitchen and came out with desert, repeating with different type of desserts everytime

Daisy "So your house.. is it nice there?"

Winter "Oh its very nice and it is in good condition thanks to Applejack" he said quickly

When Pinkie Pie finished bringing all kinds of food and drinks she then go and wait by the doorway to greet anypony that is about to come through the doorway

Daisy "Hmm... Maybe next tuesday I will come by to your house to see how your new house look like then"

Winter frozen a little when he hears what she just said, "Oookay... On Tuesday then!"

The CMC secretly hiding under a table overheard their conversations

Sweetie Belle "I think that stallion had a crush on her!" she whispered

Meanwhile near the doorway Pinkie Pie is greeting all the ponies that came to her party, the atmosphere soon begins to be filled with chatting noises

Apple Bloom,Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle looks at each other expectingly

Apple Bloom "You know what we should do?"

Scootaloo "Do what now?" she isn't expecting this, she expected somepony to say 'let's go out and tell her about it!'

Apple Bloom "We should help them get along with each other that's what!"

Sweetie Belle "That sounds like a great idea!" she saw a newspaper with a name Daisy on it, she go out and grab it then she go back under the table

Sweetie Belle "I had a plan here what we should do..."

The three of them begin to whisper to each other discussing the plans Sweetie Belle had made, once they all agreed to each other each of them slowly get out of their table, getting into their positions then...

Apple Bloom "Hey Daisy!"

Daisy surprised slightly by them, "Oh hey Apple Bloom,Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo"

Apple Bloom "We heard you are going to do some magic trick the next day at night!"

Scootaloo holding a newspaper "Yeah! Look at this newspaper!" she opens the newspaper to a page where the article about Daisy is located

Sweetie Belle "I can't wait to see some amazing magic trick of yours!"

Scootaloo put the newspaper on the table

Daisy "Let see what they wrote about me.."

Daisy levitate the newspaper and begin reading an article about her

Sweetie Belle "Scootaloo, Apple Bloom Now!.." she whispered

Scootaloo quickly trot off and grabbed a couple of her own favourite cupcakes off the table and then she trot back handing it over the table,while Apple Bloom grabbed a bottle of wine and two wine glasses, she slowly put them down on the table, Just as Winter about to say something Sweetie Belle told him to be quiet by raising her hoof to her mouth

Daisy been a vampire and all, have enhanced hearing and smell overheard them under the table as well but instead she decide to play along "Should have been better if I didn't expect this to happen..." as soon as she finishing reading the article she put the newspaper down and saw the cupcakes and a bottle of wine

Winter "I uh.." he look at Sweetie Belle, she smile brightly at him, "Brought this for you.."

Daisy despite knowing what would happen she still blushed a little, "Well how about we split them in half?"

Winter "No I'm not hungry.. You can take them whole.." his stomach rumbled, "Ehhehe" he blushed

Daisy levitate one of the cupcake near her and one toward Winter, "Let's enjoy this together, its not good to starve yourself you know.."

Winter "I guess you are right..." he overtake the cupcake that is in front of him with his magic

The CMC stared at them with awe just like they did before when seeing Big MacIntosh and Cheerilee drinking the 'love poison'

Suddenly Scootaloo remarked, "I bet you two are gonna be the be the best couples ever!" both Daisy and Winter blushed intensively and frozen,both of the cupcakes fall to the table as both of them stopped levitating it. The atmosphere around them also quieted down a little with some ponies staring at them

The three fillies stare at them with fake smiles hiding their horrified expressions

Apple Bloom "I'm leaving you two alone now!"

Scootaloo "Me too!"

Sweetie Belle "Me three!"

they sped off toward the kitchen one by one

Daisy "Did they just said... couples?"

CMC hiding behind the kitchen looking at the couples hoping their plan succeeded

Sweetie Belle "I can't believe you said that Scootaloo!" she complained

Scootaloo "Well.." feeling embarrassed, "It just popped into my head?" she looked at her friends shyly

Apple Bloom "Shhh look they are making a move!" her friends direct their attention to the couples again

(Soft Love Piano Instrumental But still if you don't want music then forget about it)

Winter "Should we go somewhere else?" both of them still blushing

Daisy "Yeah.. Sure.."

Both of them slowly stand up then trot out of Sugarcube Corner

Scootaloo "Quick let see where they are going!" she whispered

the CMC trot toward the doorway and look outside

Winter feeling a bit more bolder, he slowly said "Hey.. Instead of sleeping in your Carriage how about you sleep at my new home?"

Daisy "Well I don't know..." her love for him conquered her, "Okay I will sleep at your home then as long as we're not in the same bed.."

Winter blushed at that comment, "Hah don't be so silly I mean I never sleep with a mare out of privacy..."

Daisy "You're not a really chivalrous stallion are you Winter? Kind of like my little brother... except that the way he display chivalry is childish" she giggled a little to herself

CMC "Success!" they whispered but they also attracted some attention

Pinkie Pie seen them that she bounces toward them, "Hey!" she startled the CMC

Before Pinkie Pie can talk the CMC pull her down and closes her mouth

Sweetie Belle "Shhhh" as she is on top of her

The CMC look out the doorway again, Pinkie Pie head pop out at the highest height of the doorway

Daisy "You're like my little brother you know that.."

Winter "And you're like my big sister too..."

There are a few moment of silence as they trot down the street

Daisy "You know, my little brother he always asked me to read a storybook for him every time he sleeps.."

Winter "Really? tell me more about him then"

Daisy "Well he always value my privacy sometimes.. when a storm came by he doesn't come in.. he just stay in his room, until one day I heard him yelled. At first I was very worried but when I came to his room I see him covering himself in blankets.." giggling while remembering his little brother childhood, "That's when I invited him to sleep with me.. After that he always came to my room every time a storm comes by.."

Winter "That's very nice of you.."

Daisy "Why thank you.."

Winter "You know.. My big sister right, she a magician too and she is quite famous for her talent to make things disappear and reappear somewhere else without magic including her other unique magic tricks.. And there is this one time that she make a doll...."

They soon gone out of Sugarcube Corner district

Pinkie Pie "Awww they're sooo in love... Have to tell my friends about it!"

Apple Bloom "Tell-A-What now?"

The CMC have a slightly worried expression on their faces

---

Nearing Winter Steelbite New Home

The house is big, the style are pretty much like all the other buildings in Ponyville except it is a two storey house,it has a big yard in front of the entrance walled off with fence and a mail box near the fence gate

Winter "Well here we are"

Winter opens the fence gate and the door with his magic while Daisy examines his new house

Daisy "Your house looks beautiful" she complimented

Winter "I... Am glad that you said that.." he smile slightly, "And uh.. Come on in.." he light up his horn for light

They trot trough the fence gate then through the door

The first room they trot into are the living room filled with two small sofas,one loveseats, a wooden rocking chair as well as a small wooden table in front of the sofas,there is a doorway that lead to the kitchen while beside the doorway to the right is a staircase leading upstairs

They trot upstairs. As they gone upstairs Daisy saw two rooms "Guess I'm sleeping in one of these rooms then"

When they arrived near the first door, Winter opened the door

Winter "Um.. Here it is.."

They trot into a large bedroom where there are two comfy beds with a nightstand beside them, there is a window and a curtain too. Daisy is quite surprised that she has to sleep here with him

Daisy "Guess I might need to sleep in here instead of the other room then? Why you big pervert.." she teased him while she is blushing a little

Winter blushed at that teasing, "Well uh.. I'm not familiar with it and I don't want to be alone in someplace new..."

Daisy "So that's why you invite me for a sleepover then?"

Winter blushed further "Well... Yes..."

Daisy "You are so cute when you do that"

Winter "Uh.. That is your bed.." he points his hoof to the bed on the right

Daisy "Thanks.."

When they tried to trot to their beds they bump into each other, Both of them blushed

Winter "...You first?" he said, in a slightly gentle but slow manner

Daisy trot toward her bed silently with her face still blushing

Winter then started to trot toward his bed on the left glancing at her, Daisy glances back to him as well but in a slightly feminine manner, she smiled at him

Daisy "..Good Night Winter."

Winter "...Good Night to you as well.." he shyly said

Both of them get into their beds, Winter slowly closes his eyes drifting to sleep but Daisy on the other hand stayed awake and stared at the moon outside the window with her talisman on having flashback of her little brother

Daisy "I really wish I can see you again..."

The End Of Prologue Finale - Whole New World

---

Sneak Peek

Next on Chapter One - A Sparkling Instinct

In Twillight Sparkle Home

Applejack "So uh.. what kind of problem are Twillight having actually?"

Pinkie Pie "Well she said she thinks Daisy is a Vampire.."

Fluttershy remembered the incident "..Oh really I never thought of that.. But-" her sentence is interrupted by Rainbow Dash

Rainbow Dash "Vampires? HA! Just wait and see we will be kicking their butt in no time!' She bluffed, "Wait did you said vampires?"

Applejack "I wouldn't be so confident about it.."

Rarity "Oh please I won't believe something as horrible as that. And I don't believe in vampires either"

Pinkie Pie "I know right!? I mean Vampire doesn't exist at all and Daisy is just too nice to be actually a vampire!" She goes off screen then came back in a Sherlock Holmes costume "And I wonder what makes Twillight think she's a vampire..." she smoked the bubble pipe

Rainbow Dash "And I wondered where you get all of those costume from.."

Pinkie Pie "Well I stashed costume all around Ponyville incase of costume emergency!" she smiled

Rainbow Dash "Rrrrriiiighhhhttttt..."

Author's Note:

If people dislike my story why they aren't giving any complaints about it! Just talk it out if you disliked my story would ya? and just make sure the comment doesn't hurt alot

I'm taking the update slow and steadily so it might take a month

Comments

[Dr Gluefoot]

1329567
I haven't read this yet and it's not really my thing, but I'm having a check through and I'll give you a couple of things I've noticed so far.
I know how much it sucks to get off to a bad start due to spelling and grammar (I had a foal talking at the start of mine, so the spelling and grammar had to be off).

You should have every whole number under and including ten written in full (although fractions should be written out such as four and a half, six and a quarter, two and a third). Decimals and numbers higher than ten should be in digits (11, 4.3, etc).
You should also reword it into a consistant tense and show the scenery instead of telling it. I'll give you an example below in italics.

Inside a room decorated like the night sky with a matching bed, a white unicorn with a beautiful blue mane and even more beautiful, sky blue eyes sat as she read to a little colt by the light of his bedside lamp. As she read, her cutie mark constantly shifted it's shape.

"And that's how Celestia saved us from Nightmare Moon. The End," said the mare as she stood up, magically closing the book cover before opening a draw to put it away

"Big sis," the colt asked with a yawn, "Do you think our friendship will last forever?"

Also, you should remove the o'clock after 7:24.

As long as you fix the tense and show the setting instead of telling it, you should do well.

You really don't want to rush these things. I took a month to write my first two chapters before getting into a good rhythm.

[StoryWriter]

1390521

Thanks for the feedback i guess i did get a bad start then hahaha guess i had a lot of learn about rhythm then and as well as editing the rest of my chapters