Despite the threat of dying in less than a day’s time Zip had slept like a baby. He only wished Sgt. Amethyst Flare could’ve been afforded the luxury of sleep, but he needed her to try to reach Canterlot.
The next morning, around 07:00, he found Amethyst desperately trying to contact anypony. Sgt. Treasure Trove was dozing, the two having switched off and on. There was no getting through, and despite her best attempts, their signal wasn't reaching far. The mountains were likely to blame, but Amethyst suspected that their dear general was scrambling their long-range transmissions. Not only was this illegal, but it was dangerously irresponsible, considering their state. But good luck proving that to the highest echelon of the military.
Overcoming this was beyond her expertise… It was beyond anypony’s expertise. Amethyst knew this, knowing about everypony in the platoon, other than Pvt. Mercury Rise… and even he was no help in such matters. The sergeant's efforts in reaching out with her mind also weren't doing much good; nopony was answering near or far, and it might've been chalked up to her mental exhaustion. They could reach the division via crystal ball, but the larger body wouldn't answer, though it was clear they were receiving.
It was Frustrating.
He ordered her to sleep. She didn’t want to, but she did so anyway. Zip woke up the other sergeant, and he continued the work; other than Amethyst, he knew the most about communications.
The morning was eerily calm and a little chillier than usual, the usual being the last month; something was off in the air. Everypony was on pins and needles, though most of them still didn’t know why Zip had ordered them to do the things they’d done... or that he'd been marked for death. Nopony enjoyed morning chow; it just tasted like nothing to them.
Zip spent a short amount of time that morning sorting himself out. He and those in on what was possibly happening to him, if some ponies came down from division to grab him, had agreed to avoid contact; it would just make things harder. It took a little while, but Zip was able to, more or less, make peace with the fact he might hang in front of the entire division—minus his platoon, soon under new management—at 16:30 that very afternoon.
The weather front had appeared on the horizon just before 10:00. As Pvt. Blood Sapphire had predicted, the front rapidly moved over them, not an hour after they first saw it; it divided the sky. The wind picked up abruptly; it took little time to feel the chill coming off the sea and over the mountains some miles to the west.
Zip felt an incredible knot tie up his stomach as the icy blast rustled the bone-dry grass and scrub around them. The pines in the forest patch just north of them began to bend and sway slightly as the breeze caught them… That’s what it was… a breeze: a good healthy breeze… a steady one that would continue for some time.
Pulling a hoofful of grass, Zip noted the wind direction. He checked his compass.
At around 11:00, it became abundantly clear Zip wouldn’t die that day… at least not on the end of a rope. They saw the smoke first.
Zip pulled from his bag a spyglass he’d pinched when they raided the supply stores a final time. Extending it to its full length, he focused his view and peered to the west. Shifting to the north a little, he saw the flame; it wasn’t more than several miles off. He’d been praying to never see it, but there it was.
The centaurs were planning to trap the division with a wall of fire… but those in the path of the wall would cook. They’d waited until the right moment. Their patience with the weather paid off; its change to normalcy was inevitable.
“Oh, shit…” Zip's voice wavered.
Everypony else could now see the actual flame now without assistance; the fire grew by the second. In a moment, they’d be able to smell it. Rather than panic, most of them were scared stiff. Zip himself was close to soiling his uniform, but he swallowed the fear and ran for his gear.
Zip barked out orders, “Everypony! Listen carefully. Grab your bags and anything else you can easily carry. Inert demolition equipment—nothing that reacts to heat or fire, dry food, and medicine are priority! Only carry as much water as your kit permits; we can’t afford the extra weight! Everypony wrap your hooves! It’s gonna be hot for them! Hurry!”
The fact they’d packed their saddlebags and equipment so carefully paid off well; they’d prepared to drop the wagons if need be. About all they were leaving behind were a few crates of fruit; and they still crammed what they could into their bags.
Zip pulled Pvt. Linseed Oil to him, “Private… any idea how much time we have?”
He shook his head; he was afraid, but spoke with authority, “I can’t tell with much accuracy, sir, but where we’re standing will ashes in five minutes. The wind will carry the flame south quickly….”
Zip barked out to Pvt. Blood Sapphire, “Can we shelter in place?”
He looked most uneasy; he’d been poking around the landscape, as was his wont, “No, Lieutenant. Until a couple years ago, they were pumping oil out of the ground… all over here. The only reason we’re not seeing the pump towers is they were dismantled to build part of the Sprawl when drilling stopped being profitable. There’s so much surface oil, the heat of that fire will have the stuff pluming; it’s not just the drought that has the plant life around here looking so sorry. Where we’re standing, the ground’s almost saturated with oil.”
Zip felt his jaw clench; he almost whispered, “We have to run…”
Private Blood Sapphire nodded grimly, “It’s the only way. It’ll take a few moments for the surface oil to catch fire, even with the heat. If we stay ahead of the southern edge as it spreads, we may have a chance.”
Linseed gulped, shaking his head, “Even at a full gallop, outpacing it will be impossible. It’ll catch us within 10 or 15 minutes! The wind’s gonna go wild with the heat! We can probably stay close enough to the front of the fire to avoid any pockets of oil catching, but we won’t possibly be safe until we hit rock!”
Zip hoofed his shoulder, “Then we know what we must do.”
Sitting down with the two privates, they quickly determined the direction of the rocky outcroppings at the edge of the Unicorn Range.
Trotting into full view of his ponies, Zip shouted, “All unicorns, capable of generating a working heat shield, raise hooves and keep them up!”
To Zip’s relief most of the unicorns, only making up a quarter of the platoon, did so. The flames were moments away; the smell had just hit them.
Zip trotted up to Pvt. Blood Sapphire, one of those to raise a hoof, “It’s not safe to stay in place! We have to run! It’s our only chance! No arguments! Everypony divide up and gather around a unicorn that raised a hoof! Squad and team leaders split up as best as possible; we can't put all our eggs in one basket! Every group needs a compass! Run towards 225° like Hell, and keep on course! Stay together! At all costs, stay together! Stay close! Keep pace!”
Having gathered around a capable unicorn, the platoon looked to their leader, a mixture of fear and trust in their eyes.
Zip turned to them, “Break into a slow trot on my mark. Once you’ve found pace with one another, run. Run for your lives, because your lives do depend on it! We can’t outrun the fire! Keep your shields up until we hit the mountains! All our lives depend on that! Does everypony understand me?!”
They answered with a resounding, “YESSIR!”
Zip turned forward, “TROT! And then run at will! The fire will be at your backs soon; then it will overtake us! DO NOT PANIC when it does! Stay close under the heat shields! Do not scatter! Unicorns! Activate and maintain your shields now! As expansive as is manageable for you! You’ll be able to concentrate better now and maintain later! Figure it out!”
The unicorns able to do so enveloped their mates in protective bubbles large enough to cover them all and give them enough space to grant a little freedom… and an air supply.
Sticking close to Pvt. Blood Sapphire, who looked frightened out of his wits, Zip tapped his shoulder and he broke into a trot. Everypony else followed suit. It took a moment, but they found a pace.
“1-2-1-2-1-2-1-2!” Zip called out.
Tapping on his private’s shoulder, they increased their pace. And then again. Zip wished to look around… see how the others were holding up, but he had to concentrate on those under his umbrella. He hadn’t even really bothered to see who was there with Pvt. Blood Sapphire and himself; he couldn’t afford to think about it. They had to run. And run they did.
Having broken into a gallop, Zip could hear the roar of the flames as they devoured the dry scrubland. Not minutes later, upon seeing a glow out of the corner of his eye, the fire began to surround them. The ground below them smoldered as they moved over it. Their hooves got hot and some smoke entered the shield, but it held and kept out the actual fire. They began to sweat; the heat was almost unbearable. Zip could hear somepony—he had no idea whom—crying behind him, and he couldn’t blame them; he was close himself.
They literally couldn’t see a thing in front of them other than flame; all they had was a compass to guide them. Zip prayed they not run into any obstacles; he slowed their pace just for that reason. Running into a rock or falling in a divot would be the end of them all.
The time they spent in the heat shield was the most terrifying ordeal Zip had been through in his life; it would be hard to top it. He’d never thought so strongly he was going to die. But he didn’t die. Nopony under the protection of Pvt. Blood Sapphire would die that day.
In the foothills of the edge of the Unicorn Range, they finally emerged from the flames; the rocky outcroppings were as welcome as anything in the world. Their lungs burned due to the heat, the toxic smoke, and the decreased oxygen level in their protective shroud. After a hundred yards of bare ground, Zip slowed down his group.
He breathed to Pvt. Blood Sapphire, “Good work. Drop it.”
With a cough and a gasp, the unicorn let down the shield and dropped to his haunches, panting. The rest collapsed, wheezing.
Zip looked around. They were the second group to make it out. Other than Pvt. Blood Sapphire, his shield had contained Cpl. Little Song, Spc. Cocoa Butter, and Pvt. Caramel Crunch. Their hooves were singed, and they coughed their lungs out, but they were all alive.
They were preceded by Spc. Silver Duster’s group; among that group was SSgt. Jacinta Petals. Zip couldn’t help himself, and he ran to hug his love. Jacinta let out a sob as they connected.
He lost his thoughts a moment as he held her. Silver approached them, looking dazed and teary.
“Everypony with us made it, sir.”
Zip grabbed her and pulled her into the hug, “Us too… Oh, I’m so glad you’re okay.”
Silver sniffled, “Back at you, sir…”
They weren’t the only ponies hugging; most of them did so.
After another moment, Amethyst showed up. And then Cpl. Lily Hawk, followed by Cpl. Aster Yellows. Sgt. Treasure Trove emerged a seconds later, looking worse for the wear, but still among the living. More arrived yet, with Cpl. Stardust Painter coming last. Along with Cpl. Stardust Painter was Linseed; Silver stunned everypony by running up, tackling the skeevy stallion in an embrace, and kissing him full on the mouth.
Everypony had made it… all 54 of them. They’d stuck together and left nopony behind. Friends reunited, sobbing, carrying on, or just laughing at their “good” fortune. They treated their minor burns and gratefully downed what water they had. The insides of the shields, protected or not, had been hot as the hinges of Hell.
A feeling of elation hit Zip, but it mingled with horror as he looked to the northeast. The scrubby prairie, erupting flames as high as any building in Port City not a moment before, sat smoldering, save the oil deposits at the surface. The spots rich in the stuff weren’t hard to pick out; there were a few flaming spouts visible, but mostly they saw intense concentrations of fire spewing out inky, black smoke. The smell coming off the prairie was difficult to describe.
Private Blood Sapphire was right: if they’d sheltered in place, they would’ve died. There was no safe place north of them.
The pine forest that had separated them from the rest of the division closer to the gorge was another matter entirely. With the wind moving the smoke off the prairie, the forest was easy to see.
The understanding of what they saw was lost on nopony: flames several hundred feet high devoured everything. From east of Port City, to where they knew the gorge to be, the land was consumed in fire. All the material in the forest would keep the fire burning for some time, especially with the wind fanning it. Nighttime would see the fire die down, but that wouldn’t save the division from the centaur army. There was no passing through that deathtrap. And once the winds picked up the next day, the fire would just intensify again.
Zip blinked hard, keeping himself in check, “Everypony! We can’t rest here. We move into the foothills until we can assess the situation!”
They painfully stood up. Sore, exhausted, sick from the smoke, walking on singed hooves, they crossed the rocky outcroppings to reach shelter.
The wind dropped to nothing as evening fell upon them, allowing the smoke to settle. It was dark to begin with, it being 17:00. The smoke obscured everything; the sunset wasn’t visible… The night would be a dark one… there would be no moon for 3rd Platoon… no stars… They couldn’t even make out the forest fire 20-some miles north of them.
Zip had directed there be no fires. Unicorn horns would light their night and nothing else. In the foothills, they’d have a clear view of the land north of them… once the wind picked up the next day.
They sat, huddled together among the rocks, eating some of the perishable food they’d held onto. Zip had ordered they stay together by teams. Zip himself met with his squad leaders and Jacinta. By Amethyst’s horn, the six of them discussed matters.
None of them voiced it aloud, but all of them thought about whatever unfortunates that had been sent south, through the forest paths, to retrieve Zip; they would’ve been right in the middle of the forest when the fire hit.
They were all feeling pretty down.
“Private Sapphire really saved us today,” Sgt. Sweet Clover murmured to Zip. “I’m glad you trusted him, sir… and I’m glad we trusted you. Seeing that prairie fire behind us… Wow.”
Zip took a bite of an apple; it tasted like ashes in his mouth, though it was unburnt, “Yes… Putting everypony under one shield crossed my mind, but… if one unicorn failed, the whole thing might’ve collapsed. I saw no other way.”
Jacinta patted his shoulder, “You did good, sir… It worked, at least. Thanks to everypony holding together, we did it… at least for the moment…”
There wasn’t much to say about it; if they’d sheltered in place, there would’ve been no saving them. Hundreds and hundreds of square miles of the prairie were reduced to a smoldering mess.
Zip was at a loss for the moment; the bleakness of their situation was difficult to overstate. The rest of the division, if they lived, were trapped north of the forest fire with their backs to the Galloping Gorge. Nopony had been lost prior to that day but that would no longer be the case, certainly.
There’d been no precise measurement of the Centauri army’s numbers… but it was estimated their numbers to be anywhere from 35,000 to 60,000. It beggared the imagination they’d be able to feed an army that size, even on the lesser end of that estimate. Those things could probably eat as much in a day as a squad of ponies might. Any supplies salvageable from the “scorched Earth” demolition of the city would be few and whatever provisions they could capture wouldn’t last long. And they’d only be able to carry so much in their ships.
But one thing they all knew about centaurs—one of the most chilling facts—was those big monkey carcasses, stuck where a horse’s head should be, were omnivorous. The division might suffer a fate worse than just death. The six platoon leaders tried to shut out the thought.
To cast aside such thoughts, Zip moved on, “Still no luck reaching on the crystal balls… Canterlot?”
They all shook their heads; they’d been trying to reach anypony for hours, as they had been since the day before. It was concluded they were being scrambled.
Sergeant Treasure Trove said, “Our signal's not reaching far, but based on the amount of interference… how busy it seems to be… there must still be some ponies alive up north. But we can’t get through… I’ve set it up for us to keep trying every 10 minutes… We’re coding the message so only a unicorn’s magic can unlock it.”
“Good… Just keep at it. I’m sure we’ll get through to somepony, one way or another. Let me know when that happens,” Zip answered.
“Yessir.”
“Anything else?” Zip figured there wasn’t a whole lot else to say.
Sergeant Sweet Clover stated, “Morale’s middling… I think everypony’s just shocked. No way to tell how they’ll react to this for a couple days.”
“We might not have a couple days. We’ve given no thought to where things go from here,” Zip uttered. “The Centauri Army might not even wait to finish off the division before moving south; a fraction of their numbers could do them in.”
Zip hated saying this, but it was far from untrue. As soon as the fried prairie was cool enough for travel, they could expect the centaurs to march.
Sergeant Razor Wire piped up, “There’s something else. Along with the wind, Pvts. Oil and Sapphire ‘feel’ the storm coming on. It’s a big one… really big. We should talk to them later…”
“Lovely…” Zip murmured; he knew they were in for a little moisture, but a dump wasn’t any better than the brief drought. “And we’re exposed…”
“They figure it might start raining tomorrow… There are caves nearby; we can search for them tomorrow at first light.”
Amethyst looked up, “The weather might be on our side, then… the Centauri Army can’t very well move across the prairie if it’s waterlogged. The lack of vegetation… it’ll be a mud bowl. Might give us some time.”
Zip knew she was right, and it brought slight relief, “Okay… until tomorrow or we can figure things out or reach somepony on the crystal balls, about all we can do is sit. Sergeants: keep your teams together. Razor… once we’re done here, I want you to assign your squad watch duty. I trust you on this… stay close, and use your judgement. We can’t see much, but we need to stay sharp.”
Razor nodded, “Will do, Lieutenant.”
Zip was leading this outfit, but he was more than ready to sit back and listen to somepony that knew more than he did. What’s more, he thought it was time to lay all their cards on the table. There were a few things to reveal, and he saw no point in holding them back anymore.
He let them know, “This is uncharted territory for me, everypony. Nothing in my life’s prepared me for such a thing. But together, I think we can be better prepared for whatever happens. I have no idea what’s waiting for us… I need all of you… Don’t hesitate to say anything… Let your ponies know the same. We need to lead them, but we can’t put aside anypony’s experience. As most of you have figured out by now… our little ‘dumping ground’ of a platoon has seen some interesting talent fall in; we have quite the assortment to work with. Listen to them.”
All of them understood this well; it showed in their faces.
Zip felt reassured; it was time to drop a few bombs, “Amethyst… I think it’s time everypony knew.”
Giving him a somber look in the dark, she closed her eyes and nodded, “I agree.”
Jacinta perked up, “What’s going on?”
Everypony waited for Amethyst’s words. Zip and Amethyst had almost agreed on something else but decided to wait to reveal Pvt. Mercury Rise’s secret… at least until the initial shock of Amethyst’s secret wore off.
Looking uncomfortable, Amethyst exhaled, “This may come as a shock, but I’m not just some mare from Canterlot with a few psychic powers… I was… a warrant officer with Equestrian Intelligence… Level 4.”
Jacinta’s and the other three squad leaders’ jaws dropped.
Zip knew there was plenty else to share, but it was a start; he knew he’d be addressing his platoon as a whole the next day… to tell them what he was able… what they knew… and what was possibly going to happen to them all.
Zip walked among his platoon that night; he had little to say to them and merely tried to give them reassuring nods. Many eyes reflected dread. Things were bad… and the next day would only lead them further into the unknown. Still unable to get through to anypony by crystal ball, things appeared dark for them all.
The young lieutenant was afraid. He was afraid he’d let down his platoon… afraid he didn’t have what it took to see them through whatever lay ahead… afraid nopony on Earth would be able to do either of the previous things. But he still had something going for him. It was something nopony could hoof over to him, like a rank or some trinket telling the world of his valor or an outfit of soldiers; it was something he’d gained for himself over the last months… and gained markedly in the last day. It was something so very few could ever hope to achieve, and he’d done it by just being himself.
It didn’t occur to Zip until much later in life, but escaping the fire would’ve been a very easy thing for him. He often forgot about the wings on his back, spending most of his time on the ground with his beloved, flightless platoon. But nopony else forgot he could fly. It shamed them to admit it, but some of them gave into hopelessness, seeing the flames rise; they were sure Zip would F.O. and leave them to die. He could have just flown away… many would have if the power of flight was theirs.
Zip had given no thought whatsoever to taking off when faced with that terrifying situation.
His platoon had already been with him just about all the way… but seeing Zip not only keep them from despair… but braving that scorching desolation alongside them without a second thought… and seeing them all alive through it… it would be safe to say they’d all of them live, die, fight, kill, turn the world upside down, and even journey through Hell for their lieutenant.
They’d wind up doing plenty of all those things before the end.
I think someone set the fan to “let’s have a typhoon with fire and water” and for good measure, mixed some oil in it and an army of quadruped, omnivore giants happy to eat what that nice little fire roasted for them.
Huh and now it looked easy to saly a dragon eh?
Though I think with the massive stormfront the platoon will have much more trouble with the water than with the fire, esp if they don’t find suitable shelter.
At first I wondered why Zip didn’t prepare trenches to cut the fire off for certain parts, given it most likely would’ve engulfed them anyway at one point.. but with that oil? Yeah no wonder he didn’t bother...
Now le’ts see when our little hero to be remembers he has wings...
Thank you for the new chapter and your hard work!
Get your Baumkuchen, cake, tee and coffee here. and don’T forget, we serve rum, mead and beer... maybe, if I didn’T drink it.
9028176
It's certainly going to be a mess for the little platoon. I was thinking about making the surface oil coal seams instead, but oil sounded nastier... more reactive. I've worked in oil drilling and once got to see a plume fire with oil under pressure.
There are coal seams in my part of the United States that were accidentally set on fire and have been slowly burning for decades; you can see smoke coming out of cracks in the ground. They don't plug up as easily as oil fires, which only need an implosion to stop them.
9028205
I think the our platoon would’ve liked the coal much more....Ah well, they got oranges, so it’s fine, right?Wait, most of those are gone...
I’d rather not work near any of both. I prefer easyer work, like baking or working in the woods/ at a monastery. there I ‘just’ have to take care we have enough wood to cook and heat and sometimes take care of a few animals.(not that I’m really good at that... but well, one has to do it when he wants to drink fresh milk and eat meat right? After all, you have to know your food.)
And now on to a new chapter on your other great story. Well inbetween the breaks from RP that is...
A very interesting fic. My main problem with it is the tone gets wrecked in the first several chapters by way too many ponies being dead/comatose and mentions of hanging that are treated very casually, which takes the punch out of things like Basket Weaver's arc.
Jacinta's setup and the Hoop incident really pound it in. Because of this, the story actually manages to get lighter in tone (more what I'd expect of ponies at war) when the Centaurs arrive.
The other big problem I have with it is that Zip's whole knollwing/beserker setup seems unnecessary; the guy already won a heroic gamble against a dragon, so giving him superpowers just crushes the possibility of suspense. Amethyst has a similar problem of just being too individually powerful.
Ultimately, the fic works pretty well after about chapter 8 or so, as the characterization and tone hit their strides. The humor is also pretty good thruout (especially the poop stuff that seems to follow Zip around to lighten up the darkest situations, altho it feels odd that so much is poop instead of the other bodily functions).
9029252
I admit I took a lot of inspiration from Heinlein's Starship Troopers... the book, not the movie. It is very militaristic in nature and treats even the worst situations, including corporal and capital punishment and other manner of death, injury, and disease, as casual or business as usual.
The power thing as far as a few of the characters... I can definitely see the flaws. But Zip never knew he was anything special until his life was literally on the edge (he wasn't in control of his situation when Lt. Hoop was ready to kill him). Amethyst is aging, having honed her skills, body, and mind to the very edge while dealing with all manner of horror, and is declining. Jacinta... I know I made her too powerful. A little mare that can mop the floor with the equivalent of a special forces soldier, seemingly with a certain lack of conscious, and yet still be what she developed into... whoops.
And all the stuff about the ponies soiling themselves... I can't think of many better ways to describe real fear. You know you're good and scared when you void yourself.
Thanks very much for the comment and for reading the story. I hope you like it enough to stick with it, as they've now entered the mountains with winter now bearing down on them.
9029789
Ah, that explains it. It seems like the story lost that influence over time, which I think is a good thing since what really drew me in here was being able to sympathize with the characters, rather than the revulsion that comes with that sort of setting.
Oh yeah, I'd forgotten in my last comment that Jacinta's introduction made her way too powerful and mean. She's so much better later on it's like they're not even the same character.
Pissing in fear certainly is more moderate, but would make more sense for something like the audience's reaction to the Hoop scene.
As for farting, I'm certainly biased from my fetishes, but I find the lack of it, especially in their humor, very odd considering that they're: 1) Herbivores, and therefore must have some special guts to ferment plant matter (generating a ton of gas). 2) Mostly male, thus less likely to bother with appearances. 3) Of varying social class, thus likely to have disagreements on said bothering. 4) In very close quarters for extended periods of time. 5) Probably eating a metric ton of fiber to stay regular and healthy, as is standard for armies.
Maybe I forgot/missed something, but I only remember that "cat cut a fart" in a song. That aside, the interpretation that actually makes the most sense with the story so far is that they have some weird culture where farts are completely non-humorous and something you subconsciously ignore, no matter how obvious. Very silly attempt to rationalize, but I guess would be itself a meta fart joke if this were ever made into a video or audio format!
Stepping back from silly overanalysis a moment, I don't remember a single sneeze or hiccup, and am sure there was at least one belch, but not many, in the story. The lack of these things can make a setting feel less real, and it should be noted that FiM actually does a great job with peppering in sneezes, an okay one with adding belches that establish character, and a passable one with similarly character-establishing whoopie cushion instances.
I definitely plan to keep reading, it's better than most war stories I've looked into.
9029976
I try to go for casual dadaism in my writing. If you haven't looked at another of my stories, Princess Essenta, it's about a crude princess with a possible drinking problem. She and her friends get up to all sorts of nasty hi-jinks when the mood calls for it. My sequels to Larkspur Blossom, my first story, will receive a "Mature" tag and the dadaism will hopefully jump up a few levels.
If you're looking for a book with a lot of casual profane actions and situations that's really funny, look up J. Christian Miller's The Real Animal House. Chris Miller was one of the writers for the movie Animal House. The book his his memoir of his sophomore year at Dartmouth College, 1960-1961. Not only is it hilarious, it's very well written and descriptive. I recommend it to anyone up for a laugh or that wants to see what descriptive writing can be when really applied well. I was in an "animal house" myself my first run at college, before pony was even a thing, and I was "privileged" to take part in or at least witness many of the stupid things recounted in the book. Camera phones really ruined fun.
9030006
Could you elaborate on the concept? My understanding of Dada is its origin (art deliberately going against what people look for in art, in order to be a statement that we do not deserve art), not necessarily what it is now.
Sounds interesting, but sadly, the internet ruined me for books. I do certainly enjoy stories with a more realistic approach in general; take a pee instead of a soliloquy.
9030023
It's the casual absurdism aspect of dadaism I'm going for, describing otherwise "realistic" situations in a grossly or morbidly cynical fashion. It's as old as the dada movement itself and was visible in literature as well as art. There's only so much I can do with a "Teen" rating, despite my belief that anything ever done or said or shown in any movie PG-13 or its equivalents, and below, are totally fair game for a "Teen" story on the site.
Saying "he had bad breath" just doesn't have the same punch as "his breath stunk, as if he'd just eaten a bowl of maggots". It's that kind of casual sickness I'm going for. That line is paraphrased from Iceberg Slim's memoir Pimp.
I still recommend Miller's memoir. I doubt you'd not enjoy it.
9030124
Ah. I like to do a bit like that with dialog from Applejack in my stories (colorful and absurd, if not generally morbid and cynical, metaphors).
This story seems a bit tame other than a few spots as far as Teen, actually, but I'm unsure where things really cross over into mature for violence, as it's not like every story is correctly rated.
9071777
Well it’s only long when you are not used to chapters of that size. Wich I am a hughe fan of.
9071805
It doesn’t count when you only need secs. You’re an artist!
Though now that I thnk back, we didn’t do much of those back in 04, well that’s the Bundeswehr for you. At least we had good food on the weekends. Not to mention having fun with the so called MG3... ok maaaaybe one of them wasn’t exactly converted and still had it’s original parts... but who cares? (And I cann tell you nothing is more fun when handling guns than an MG3! Except your loyal throwing weapon the P1.. well at least I managed to hit sometimes... not that I was that much better with the P8... Though I was quite decent with the G36.)
back to the important stuff:
Hope you’re not burning away over there!
Now, have some cold drinks, a bit Baumkuchen and maybe a nice BBQ!
9071852
Weather's pretty cool in my part of the USA right now; it's been quite pleasant being able to air out the house. And I may cook up some BBQ over the weekend if I can find some pork on sale.
9071858
Well that sounds good.
We have nice 32°C (89,6°F) here. And I already know that there will be a BBQ next week.
9071875
I didn't know you served. You mentioned the G36. I'm what some call a "gun nut" on this side of the world. I've used a G36 but am more partial to the G30; it has a little more to hold onto and holds more ammunition. I imagine you've seen a G25 or G28; domestic sales of these models aren't allowed in the USA, but they're essentially the G19 and G26 in .380 ACP. Glocks are great; I'm just a Beretta man, myself.
9072458
Yeah I served, at least until I got injured a bit. Nothing too big.
But I think we have a little misunderstanding here. I meant the HK G36A1 Never held a Glock in my life. Though I of course am trained on the Walther P1 (civi name P38) and HK P8.
And well, it’s not exactly easy getting a permit in germany... Gotta love Switzerland for that. You served?Hey, why don’t you take your rifle with you, just in case something happens!....
9072796
I never served in the military myself. The world's become a very different place in the last two decades and I had sugarbeets to deal with.
Walther makes some fine firearms.
9072802
Well I wasn’t that shure myself if I should do it, but after a few hour long talks with my great grandfather and, some less than good things happening, I just thought why not try doing at least something.
Then, I don’t really think one must serve. After all, there are many other important things to do right?
Oh the discussions I had back then about serving and not serving, being called a murderer....
fun times, you know?
9071805
He can take an orphanage, promise them new shoes; but take them to a factory, turn them into glue
9073499
He can take a bunny, give it a good squeeze; mix what comes out with batter, chocolate chip cookies!
9073538
😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
9073545
Booooooo. Boo Wendy Testaburger
9073558
Yes, I'm a genius... Not really; if I had brains I'd not be playing with sugarbeets.
9073573
He can take a bike. and take off the seat. put your sister on it. roll it down a bumpy street.
9077296
I know you didn't make that one up; it's a verse often listed on any site that shows cadences.
9077312
I know it is not mine. I though it was funny.
9077318
Well stop it. Be nice to my cougar waifu.
9077351
Relax, dude. It's just a story. Try to enjoy it.
Updating soon?
9089943
Soon... The canoe trip I took still has me catching up on things. I hope to have something in a few days.