Crashland: Equestria

by computerneek

Reading

It takes Twilight three days to read her book-letter. Not only does it have around ten times as many pages as any book its thickness has a right to have with parchment far cleaner than any she’s seen before, but the writing is far smaller than the finest hoofwriting she’s ever seen- yet still perfectly legible. She’d spent almost two hours marvelling at the pages and the text, until she got to reading the first page- and realizing the book itself is discussed in section eighteen.

Of course, Celestia had been informed. Both the older Princesses had been surprised to find that not only had that brown mare understood Twilight’s hornwriting, but she had also been able to write this entire book in response to Twilight’s letter in under a day!

Then, of course, Twilight has realized why sixteen of the forty-two sections are missing from that initial table of contents. The first of these, as section three, had rambled on for three pages about why she had used the term ‘sections’ instead of ‘chapters’. The second, section six, had rambled for six pages on what makes a good quill. Even Twilight had been bored by that.

The last, as section forty-one, had bumbled away almost a hundred pages about the importance of a concise message, as opposed to the eighty-three pages of rambling Twilight had originally sent. She’d almost fallen asleep by the time she finished. Twilight found the final section, forty-two, to be the most important one. It was also quite wordy, but the message contained was clear.

Firstly, that brown mare- ‘Aria’- would like a party. However, while she’s been able to figure out the written language from Twilight’s letter- a fact that raises Twilight’s eyebrows- she still knows next to nothing of the spoken language. Supposedly, that problem should be solved- completely and permanently- within a few minutes of the start of the party.

Second, the use of the gate to return to her ‘ship’- Twilight’s not so sure that description fits- is completely off-limits. Apparently, she’s the only pony that can safely pass through those gates; for all others, it’s very dangerous. She does note- across two pages- exactly how lucky Twilight is to have survived the gate at all, let alone long enough to take the cure.

Third, Aria isn’t from this world- and, as a result, Equestrian magic is new to her. She’s interested to know exactly how it might interact with her whenever she wanders beyond her ship’s protective barriers without an auxiliary… which she says her ‘brown mare form’ is. Apparently, this ‘auxiliary’ is just a body, with no soul- rather, the life is projected into it from elsewhere. This does not make it a zombie, though, as the life- and conscience- controlling it is a real, live entity. By the description, this ‘auxiliary’ lets her be in two places at once without time travel. So magic can’t be channeled through the auxiliary- so what? It had taken Twilight a few hours to drag her mind back down from the clouds. Magic or not, if she had one of those ‘auxiliary’ forms, she could study twice as hard- or, study just as hard all day long and also spend the day having fun- or going on adventures- with her friends.

To her surprise, Princess Celestia expressed an interest in that kind of ability as well- though, only if the second form could also use magic, even if only by channelling her normal power. Celestia and Luna had both declined to answer why they’re interested.

So, Twilight had started on her response. She’d set herself a one-page limit for this one, after that incredibly long-winded reply; clearly, she’d met somepony that could out-ramble her… And let on absolutely nothing in the process. So, if she keeps her next letter concise, perhaps she won’t get quite so ramble-y of a response?

It’s not going very well- the stack of discarded single-page drafts next to her is already taller than her throne.

---

She snaps the book shut, letting out a hearty laugh as she does so, before taking a sip of her… cold chocolate. A momentary swirl, with the tap of her pinkie finger, fixes that, before she checks the control panel next to her.

The weather’s nice out today- so she’s stationed atop the Observation Deck once again. She’s spent much of her time through this last week reading her own response to that Twilight Sparkle’s letter. It had taken her close to four hours to read the translated letter; much of it had turned out to be rambling nonsense, but she’d ordered it saved anyways; no telling what info her ship’s powerful computers might be able to pull out of it, especially when correlated with future streams of rambling. Writing the response had taken hardly fifteen minutes; she had only to jot down a few notes on what she wanted it to contain and what general pattern she wanted, then those same computers became the Rambler Supreme for her. Honestly, she never knew one could talk so long on why magic is called magic without repeating themselves- or saying anything at all!

Her check of the control panel comes up empty- no response has come up yet. Now that she’s read her own letter, the main message- that rambling is boring- is way obvious. Maybe she did it too much…? It’s also possible the ponies are taking their time reading it. They clearly hadn’t realized one thing- that ribbon that tied it shut, made of woven steel, had carried her entire letter, in concise form, in some fancy cursive Equestrian. In terms of readability, it’s pretty good- though one has to look closely to realize it’s not a decorative pattern but actually words. It had taken only six sentences, on that- and much of that was spent clarifying what in Equestria an ‘auxiliary’ is.

She is looking forward to, whenever the reply comes, meeting this ‘Pinkie Pie’ mare. Though, Twilight had mentioned her gate had been detected; something about a ‘thaumic flow’, too hyper-controlled to be anything except top-level spellwork. Makes sense- with the way her ship tunes rift energy, it is extremely destructive, if not contained. As such, in its systems, containment- and safety- are of paramount importance. That attention to containment could easily have been mistaken for an expert spellcaster.

So, she contemplates- what next? A couple taps on that tablet activates another auxiliary form. She’s now got a few dozen of them, waiting in their stasis tubes, all to match her initial ‘brown mare’ appearance. This one, she trots down to one of the main bays, hopping into a small stealth aircraft. The invisibility it demonstrates is imperfect; much like many game ‘cloak’ effects, if one looks closely, they can still see the ripple as it moves- and, even, the shape. When it crosses between someone and what they’re looking at, they may notice the loss of focus. Nevermind that this optical projection camouflage tends to break down with too many viewpoints, and is useless against viewers it can’t see. It should be enough to get her down near Ponyville, outside the prying eye, without that betraying thaumic emission. An alert pony- or party of ponies- would likely still see it; however, with good routing…

While the vehicle blasts its way out the open bay, crossing the barriers into Equestria without a care in the world, her chocolate mug earns itself a refill. Perhaps she should try testing her magic compatability before she hears back from Twilight? It’s not like she would- or, really, could- suggest anything different.

Comments

[LostArchivist]

and conscience-

I see that one a lot. You mean consciousness. Conscience refers instead to the sense of right and wrong.

To her surprise, Princess Celestia expressed an interest in that kind of ability as well- though, only if the second form couldalsouse magic, even if only by channelling her normal power. Celestia and Luna had both declined to answerwhythey’re interested.

Well, either they are liches in this world, or "Sunny Skies" wants more options when disguised. Wonder which it is...

I question her ability to write in Equestrian after one letter, though, no matter how verbose it is. Ignoring it for sake of not having a three month interlude on languages. :D

The ribbon was a nice touch. Purplesmart may be annoyed when she finds out. I wonder if Discord will say anything...

[computerneek]

8825457
No, they're not liches- but imagine if you were Celestia, and you suddenly could be in two places at once- in the throne room, dealing with business as usual, and on a beach someplace, relaxing. Yes, not quite as relaxing as if she's in only one place, on that beach... But it sure beats being only in the throne room. Luna's probably going for something similar- though that might relate to taking care of two nightmares at once. She's got an entire country's worth each night- no doubt she doesn't have time for them all!

As for her ability to write in Equestrian... Eighty-three pages is plenty for a supercomputer to figure something out. As for writing in Equestrian... While she has downloaded the written language into her mind, so far she's only printed it.

Yes, I imagine Purplesmart is going to be very annoyed when she finds out. Speaking of Discord... He might play a part in that, as well...

[LostArchivist]

8825791
The lich thing was a joke, since there's been speculation as to how they are immortal, and it DOES fit well with the remote-meat-car-piloting idea.

Another idea for one of your stories: Introduce Pinkie Pie to coffee (Turkish, if you REALLY want to be evil).
https://theartrix.deviantart.com/art/Today-on-Mythbusters-ponies-200939257