OK, I'm just reading the first few paragraphs of the story but I have to say it. Your OC donut steel, Strong Heart, makes me sick with his generic as fuck goody two shoes backstory and personality. A fanfic should never start by singing praises of the OC protagonist, It's too Mary Sueish.
Halfway into the second month, and Strong Heart decided to give her half his meals every day. In return, she didn’t throw her bad food at him. Instead, she would toss it at the wall, where the occasional rat or two would come out from the window to feast. They still didn’t talk to each other, neither one believed that they even liked the other, but they came to an understanding. It was a small step, but a step nonetheless.
when i first read this i didnt read the entire paragraph. so in my mind i imagined him looking at the rat and and it talking to him
Sounds like it could be interesting. Added to read later pile.
Hunter C. Creed
Interesting let's see how it will roll on
Lookin' good ,continue
I had a break during work to read this. As I said I was interested. Starting off I quickly got into it. By the end I was cheesed because there is only one chapter. It was only like fifteen - twenty minutes of reading. But I ate it up, so I ask you;
static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2011/8/24/1314207708786/oliver-twist-007.jpg
Please sir, can I have some more?
Hunter C. Creed
948368 More will come tomorrow.
948375 As long as its ready so I can put it on my phone to read during my break tomorrow you are my hero.
Keep it up.
Hunter C. Creed
948368
MOOOOOOOOOOORE!?!? NOPONY ASKS FOR MORE!!!!1
OK, I'm just reading the first few paragraphs of the story but I have to say it. Your OC donut steel, Strong Heart, makes me sick with his generic as fuck goody two shoes backstory and personality. A fanfic should never start by singing praises of the OC protagonist, It's too Mary Sueish.
when i first read this i didnt read the entire paragraph. so in my mind i imagined him looking at the rat and and it talking to him
E