The Gumdrop Files

by MintCakeWrites

Card Sharks

It was a good week for trouble. Dark days, storms brewed on the horizon. Local pegasi were real riled up over a cider shortage. Made sure everypony else suffered for it. Left folks in a real bad mood. Most would keep it to themselves. Other ponies preferred to lash out. Arguments over spilled milk.

Heard rumours on the streets. Whispers of something big happening. It’s a sad world when I know that’s good for business. When folk are whispering, it means trouble. Trouble means somepony is willing to pay to get out of it. Wasn’t too long before I had a knock on my door.

It had been some time since my last case. Real messy work. Took a week to get the sap out of my tail, but it was worth it. The pay fixed my empty sweet cupboard, now full of goodies. Winter was approaching, snack times were wearing thin. A colt would be lucky to get an extra turn on the slide for just a cookie, ponies had to start saving up. Figured the job would be a simple one.

I called for my late-night visitor to come in. Enter a young filly. Coat like bubblegum and hair of raspberry ripple ice-cream. Just had her birthday. Good food, good time. Wasn’t invited. I’m used to it. Most don’t want me around unless I’m needed.

And I may have lost the invitation. Bookbags are portals to other worlds. Check the documents, I wrote the essays myself.

“I hear you’re the kind of pony that helps,” she moved closer, horn’s glow removing her hat. Had that ‘I know what I want’ look about her. I know a good few colts who’d get into a pie fight over somepony like her.

“Depends on the help.”

She slid a picture, “I need to find this. It was taken from me.”

I gave it a look over. Standard affair. New craze had swept the lower levels of the playground. Big players had their footballs to play with, the brainiacs had found a card game. Came from a distant land, creatures battling one another. Took a smart pony to crunch the numbers, smarter one to understand the rules.

I’d seen the way ponies were acting over just opening new packs. Like a foal chasing a new sugar high. Makes me quake thinking about what it was doing to their minds. I stayed away from that side of things. Just another thing for ponies to spend their hard-earned pocket-bits on.

This colt doesn’t need another vice.

My dad already has one in the workshop.

Picture was of a card. Could see why somepony would want this, all shiny and cool looking. Knew a few colts who’d want their hooves all over it. Remember thinking how’d a sweet thing like this end up with one of these?

“Doesn’t look like the sort of thing a filly like you should have. Coltfriend lost it?”

“I don’t have one. It’s mine,” cold reply. She was hurting. Sentimental value, not about the bits.

I offered a seat, and pulled open a new carton. She declined a glass, so I helped myself. Should stop drinking juice that late, but that’s not important.

“Where did you last see it?”

“I was at the school park. Some colt came up and asked if he could have a look at my collection. I let him and when my head was turned, he was gone.”

“Along with the card. This is going to be tough, market’s perfect for something like this,” I sipped at the amber. Nothing like an ice-cold apple taste to wake the mind.

A pink hoof smacked into the desk, “I don’t care if a dragon has it! I need it back.”

I nodded. She meant business, and I couldn’t say no to a filly like this. Also, that desk couldn’t take a lot of punishment

“Like I said, tough. Not impossible. Standard fee, half up front.”

The unicorn hesitated, like she didn’t expect me to take the case so readily. She placed the payment on the desk. I gave it a sniff. Raisin. Nice.

“I’ll get in touch when I know more. Expect results by the weekend. What should I call you?” A name is always good, but some prefer to stay anonymous. I never questioned, so long as the pay was fresh.

The hat had found its way back on her head, “Whip, Strawberry Whip.”

Like that, she was gone. I took a moment, finishing the glass. I glanced to the carton, could easily go for another. Later.

Case first. There were plenty of ponies who could know where something like this could have gone. I should start by hitting the normal sources. Spike was a potential fence, and he owed a favour after the missing gem case a few weeks back. Sugarcube was a good spot for a stakeout, plus Pinkie might have seen something. Sweet treats make warm seats, and who doesn’t want to gossip a little.

I looked at the pony in the mirror. Set that up to make sure the hat fit OK a few weeks back. Hadn’t quite hit the hard-bitten detective look I was aiming for yet. Lacked the 5 o’clock shadow. Stood outside at 5 everyday trying to catch that shadow, still nothing. Just a fine orange coat and a yellow mane, like one of those adult mixed drinks. Had a taste of one once. Tasted nothing like punch.

Phone started to ring. String making that wonderful clatter. I brought the can up to an ear. When the can rang, it was rarely good news. It wasn’t.

The case would have to wait. Something far bigger came up that night. Should have guessed, nothing good happens on a Thursday.

Bath time.

---

The day was grey outside. Cleared up when Ditzy moved out the way, but the cloud remained. Despite the easier light, I was still grumpy from the events of that morning so far.

A grilling from the land-pony before I went out. Could see where she was coming from, but getting that ball back involved tussling with the Apple’s pigs. Can’t blame me for getting the kitchen muddy when I got back. Something else about toys being left out. Tried explaining it was vital evidence from another case, but that didn’t slide.

Then came the punishment. Milk. Unless it’s chocolate flavoured, it can go back to the cows.

Hat on, notepad ready. Investigation time. First stop, Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie Pie knows everypony in town. Rumour had it she kept a file on their party likes and dislikes. First step to a party is preparation. If something was going down, she’d be the one to know.

The smell of cinnamon was heavy in the air, chased by fresh baked goods. I took a rough look around. Quiet for a day like today. Guess the weather was keeping folks inside. Smart. Raincoats are silly, and my umbrella went missing weeks ago.

The town’s favourite pink pony had finished serving when she caught my eye. Silent nod. Serious mode engaged. She placed her guard gator on the counter and took me to one side. Smart mare, knew how to interrogate. Learned that skill from her last summer. All about lamp positioning, simple.

“I’m looking for something, might have passed through here,” I flashed the picture.

Pinkie nodded, “Worth a lot.”

“More than you know.”

“Who’s the poor pony who’s been preyed upon?”

“Young filly, Strawberry Whip.”

“Sister to Liquorice Whip,” a dossier on the older Whip thumped on the table. Stallion, candy yellow coat. Set of weird shaped dice as a cutie mark.

“What have you got?”

“Likes games of all kinds, especially card games. Three time Sorcery: The Get-Together Ponyville champion. He’d be interested in the big game today, too.”

“Big game?”

“Monster Mash. Playing for marbles at the big tables.”

“Big tables?”

Pinkie nodded, “All ages welcome.”

“How do the kids get up there?”

“Stools.”

“Makes sense.”

“There’s no money involved, just marbles.”

“Got it, makes no sense.”

Pinkie offered a cookie. Can’t say no to the candy queen. It was sweet: chocolate and hazelnut. I wrote a few notes in my pad. As well as a kick-flank drawing of me fighting ninjas. Pinkie approved.

“You need more belts. If you want in on the game, you’ll need a good deck,” Pinkie gestured to her own prize deck, “Buy-in is your best three marbles, winner takes all.”

I frowned, “That’s a big risk. Surely they’re not playing for keeps.”

Pinkie nodded. Pieces started falling, this was trouble.

“You can’t be serious!”

“I’m not, I’m Pinkie Pie, but this is a super-duper big deal,” she grabbed my cheeks, “SUPER-DUPER! You better be careful, Gum!”

“Pinkie!” a voice called her away and back to work, leaving me some time to think it over. The case had jumped considerably. Went from a simple recovery to a high stakes game. Best bet was to investigate this tournament and see what my options were.

I left Sugarcube Corner, after snacks of course. Next person to interview, one resident known across Equestria. You might ask yourself how somepony like me ends up knowing him. I’ll let you wonder about that.

Spike is a good guy, helped me out on a few cases and I’ve kept his O&O habits under wraps. A reputation could take a nasty knock with information like that. It’s not a pleasant thing to do, keeping secrets hidden. It’s gotten me in trouble a few times, but sometimes you got to have a leg up on things.

I explained the basics of the case, he agreed to help however he could. Turned out, he had a Monster Mash deck on him at all times. He talked me through the basics of the game, gushed about his carefully customised dragon deck.

“So you take these cards, then turn these to activate your power crystals. Next, you can play this card from your hoof which triggers this effect. Still with me?”

I stared at the sheer number of cards on the table.

“I think this whole thing might go better with you playing,” Spike’s a good guy, but this kind of thing wasn’t my slice of cake. Most complicated game I had played was Go Fish.

“Come on! You’ve got it. You just need to make sure you get Ultra Metallic Dragon Queen out and BAM! You’ve won!” Not sure where this confidence was coming from, maybe it was a play. Still had a small suspicion that the dragon was in on the whole play.

“This is really hard for a kid’s game. How do you know this so well?”

“Oh, um, you know… played with kids. Only because they asked me to, you know. Because it’s a kid’s game really, I just like the pictures,” Nervous look, eyes darted side to side.

“Spike, do older ponies play this at all?”

“OK, I gotta go do the thing. In the place. Good luck Gumdrop!”

“Wait is there anything… else… I need to know,” By the time I finished the question, he was halfway down the street. Ran like the reaper pony himself was after him. I just added it to Spike’s file.

I took out the photo again, comparing it to the other cards. Made sense that somepony stole the card to use in the tournament. Somepony who needed it to win, and bad. Question was, who had taken it. I figured the best way to find out was to play every pony until I saw it, then raise the stakes in the game. Big risk with Spike’s cards, but the client comes first.

I made myself scarce, had to collect my marbles. I had a tournament to win. I managed to get back to the office, only to find the client was waiting for me inside. Offered her another juice, but I ended up drinking it myself.

“How’s the investigation going?” Strawberry asked. She looked worried, stressed. Like a mother when you’re in new clothes.

“It’s going places. Reckon your card has been taken for the tournament today.”

Strawberry swallowed, now she was nervous, “O-oh. What’s your plan?”

I rattled around for my secret stash, finding the jar and offering one to the pink filly. She declined, smarter pony than me. These things will kill me one day, but it’s a big job. I took off the wrapper and popped it in, white stick poking out. Cherry flavour.

“Need to find out who’s taken your card. Gonna enter the tournament myself. Reckon he took it to use it.”

“What?!” hooves, again, crashed on my desk, “You can’t! you don’t know the first thing about the game!”

I winced at the marks on the furniture, “Spike taught me the basics and I-“

“What’s the best crystal to creature ratio? Best way to counter a three tier Bass Cannon set up? How many creatures can you inverse summon on your third main phase?!”

“… inverse what?”

Strawberry groaned, throwing her hooves up, “I’m never going to get it back!”

My chair made a satisfying crash as it hit the ground. Strawberry saw through the accidental noise, so I paused for dramatic effect, “Get a hold of yourself mare! I might not know how to play, but together we can win this thing!”

I imagined I looked especially heroic there, and let the moment hold. Strawberry eventually pulled me back to the room.

“I guess… but I don’t know anything about this tournament!” She looked to me.

I searched behind my desk, pulling out the Jar. I told her what I knew so far as I dug out my best three marbles. A professional needs to keep a promise.

“You paid for a job, I’m gonna see it through to the end. You came to me for a card, I’m getting you that card.”

The can rang. I glanced to Strawberry before answering it. A short conversation.

“First, have you had lunch? Mum's made hayburgers.”

---

We arrived at the tournament just in time for registration. The set up seemed easy enough. Ten matches, scoring points for wins and draws. Whoever scored the most, takes the marbles. Colts in charge of the tournament didn’t care that we entered as a pair. So long as we had the marbles to cover it, and only used the one deck, it was ideal for them. It wasn’t easy letting so many marbles go, but I had faith in Strawberry Whip and Spike’s eye for good cards.

We scanned the crowd to check out the competition. They seemed to be the normal cluster of ponies to enjoy this sort of thing until Strawberry pulled at my leg.

“There! That colt!” she pointed at somepony I knew well enough. We strode up to him as he lazily flicked through his cards, wearing a small smirk.

“Well well, gumshoe Gumdrop. What a surprise to see you here,” a deep purple coat with a matching black cape. Add a permanent sneer and a set of diabolical wings, you’ve got yourself one slice of bad pie.

My arch nemesis, “Treacle, what are you doing here?”

“Him!” Strawberry pointed at the pegasus, “He asked to look through my deck! When I checked later, the card was gone!”

Treacle had a face of pure innocence, pulling at his perfectly styled mane, “Me? Why, I would never steal another pony’s special card.”

I snorted, “Not likely, I remember the time with the pies!”

“They were a special gift.”

“The apple crates!”

“The Apple family said they were going bad, I needed to dispose of them. Hardly my fault if there was a picnic happening.”

“The bees!!”

Treacle paused at that one, “With the bees I will admit some hoof in the matter, but come now. We’ve discussed this with Miss Cheerilee. I’ve done nothing wrong.”

Strawberry glowered, “Gum, if anypony has it, it’s him. It’s got to be!”

“Alright, Treacle! I have a wager!”

The spawn of clouds and sprouts raised an eyebrow, “Go on.”

“We challenge you to a match in the tournament! If we win, you give back Strawberry her card!” I stomped for dramatic effect. A few colts who had formed an audience gave a little applause and a few woops.

“Very well!” Treacle stood dramatically on his hind hooves, one on the table. “And if I win, then you must…”

The dramatic pause hung for moment too long. Treacle looked around nervously.

“Er, anypony have any ideas?”

“He could give you all his snacks next month?” an unhelpful voice suggested.

“Aha! Yes! If you lose, I get all of your snacks!” Treacle cackled as perfectly time thunder rolled.

“You fiend! As much as those cookies mean, the job comes first! You’re on!” I stuck my hoof out at him, as if it were a fully loaded slingshot.

A bell rang. S bored teenaged unicorn stood up, announcing the beginning of the tournament. The match against Treacle would have to wait. Strawberry and I took our seats, shuffling Spike’s deck.

The first three matches were simple enough. After the second, I had a better understanding of the rules and the terms. Still felt out of place sat in such a large gathering of eggheads, but Strawberry didn’t seem to mind. Almost like she was in her element, surrounded like a lighthouse of hope in a sea of nerd.

Felt weird that we were playing against colts that were far too old to be playing a foal’s card game, but I put that to one side. It didn’t help that half of them were supplying the wooshing and magic noises in their attacks.

Land-pony once said that some ponies don’t grow up, just older. She said it wasn’t a bad thing, but I got the feeling it was directed at somepony in particular. It isn’t dad’s fault he still makes model airplanes. Planes are cool, especially when you run around making the shooting noises.

Fourth match it was getting tricky. Stallion by the name of Pencil Pusher was our opponent, used what Strawberry called a ‘mill’ deck. Didn’t see anything to do with flour, so I figured it was a gaming phrase. We took him down with a lucky draw and a good deal of imagination.

I imagined a dragon eating his griffons.

We lost out on our fifth match, but I had noticed a few odd things. A lot of these older ponies had cards that were as shiny and cool as Strawberry’s missing one. By the sixth, I figured it was time to do a little more digging.

“There’s one thing I don’t understand,” I began over a break of vegetable crisps, “Some of these ponies have bought their cards. Why don’t you just buy a new one?”

Strawberry shot a sad look, backstory time.

“It isn’t really my card, it was a gift. I was young, in love. He taught me how to play, taught me about things that no colt had ever taught me before. Risk, Discord’s Chess, Ponyfinder, a whole new world! Now he’s gone!” She sat, trembling a little.

I paused for a moment, “Sorry for your loss.”

“He said he’d come back after summer camp, and gave me the card to look after! I can’t lose it!” Her eyes brimmed with tears. I’m no good with this sort of thing, so I followed my tried and trusted technique. A cookie, a smile, and a line pulled from a movie.

“Don’t worry, Gum’s on it sweet cheeks. I’m gonna make this right, but I can’t do it alone. You in?” Finished off the line with a badass pose, despite the grumbling from the others at the table.

“You’re taking this a little too seriously, dude,” one colt mumbled into his snacks.

I didn’t care, there was a filly who needed cheering up. It paid off, Strawberry wiped at her eyes and smiled.

“Alright, let’s do this!” she joined me, standing on the table. “Wait, did you just call me sweet cheeks?”

Next games were close. We took one loss and a draw, but came out decently on the other side. We were just one more match from taking on Treacle. Rumour had spread though, our dynamic duo taking the tournament by storm. A new comer with a deck like no other, and a filly with more skill this side of Neighpon.

Then came our moment. We took our place opposite Treacle, who sent a smarmy smile our way. The referee looked down at both sides.

“Alright, this is the last match. Ready?”

I glanced to Strawberry and returned the nod, “Ready.”

“Ready,” Treacle yawned, mockingly waving a hoof near his face.

“BEGIN!”

First few turns were nothing special, set up and a few probes on our defences. The real challenge came on Treacle’s fifth turn, as Strawberry leapt to her hooves.

“That’s the third wonderbolt you’ve played! This is an anti-dragon deck!”

Treacle oozed a smirk, “Well done. Dragon fighters versus dragons, let’s see how grandmaster Spike’s deck matches up against its toughest foe yet!”

The smile turned to near maniacal laughter at my reaction, “Oh yes, Gumshoe! I know that it isn’t your deck! And I will humiliate you, your filly and that two-bit dragon for even pretending to play this game!”

His attack was unstoppable, turn after turn of pegasi came at our dragons. I could see the war in my mind, the battlefield streaked with groaning dragons as the crack team took them head on. Treacle himself flying among them besides Captain Spitfire.

Soon, we were down to our last crystal before game over. Strawberry grabbed at her as she racked her head for a counter to these attacks. The look in her eyes told me all I needed to know.

I placed a hoof on the deck, “One more turn. We can do this.”

A nod.

I added the card to our hoof.

Treacle’s grin faltered at my growing smile.

“We play The Fair Princess, which activates our commander’s second effect: Coronation!” I stood beside our newly crowned Dragon Queen.

“And that’s not all!” Strawberry cried, “We then use our spell tome: Deus Ex Machine! This makes our Dragon Queen take on her final form.”

The battlefield quaked as we rose in the air, Treacle’s jaw dropping. I gave Strawberry a final nod before we shouted in unison.

“COME FORTH, ULTRA METALLIC DRAGON QUEEN! TAKE HIS POWER CRYSTALS!”

The sound roaring of our dragon was unlike anything I had heard before. The scream sent pegasi and clouds soaring away, leaving on Treacle standing alone. He let out a cry of help before he was eaten in one gulp.

“We did it!” Strawberry cried, leaping as high as she could. I flashed a smile, revelling in the victory.

Then another player asked us to keep it down and to get off Treacle. I spat out his cloak, letting him get to his hooves with a flap. Treacle gave me an evil glare before fleeing the scene, deck left scattered on the floor.

“Ah jeez, hey little dude! Come back!” the organiser gathered the cards in his magic, “Aww, if he tells his mom about this the game will end up banned. Alright ponies, pack it up. Come get your marbles, we better go.”

A bittersweet victory.

---

The next day, I finished off writing my notes on the case. Got the idea from the Pinkie. She told me about her friends keeping a diary or writing letters about their adventures. Seemed like a smart move, gave me something to do on the quiet days.

The door squeaked open, and a familiar filly trotted in. She dug around inside her bag for a moment, before taking out a cookie. Strawberry sighed as she passed the remainder of the payment. This one was chocolate chip. Her ears flicked as I passed it back.

“Didn’t find your card, can’t take payment for a job not done.”

Strawberry pushed it fowards, “B-b-but you helped me get something more! Look!”

She turned to one side, showing off the fresh cutie mark. Deck of cards mid-shuffle, perfect for her.

“I got it when we won. Card or no card, I have to repay you for this!”

I tapped a hoof against my chin, before ducking under the desk. I took out the special lollipops, the ones for celebrations. Peppermint swirl, perfect. I passed one over to Strawberry, helping her unwrap it.

“It’s strong for a first timer,” I smiled a little as she winced at the flavour. “I’m a professional, Miss Whip. I didn’t get you the card, I don’t take the payment.”

I waitied for the disheartened look on her face, “But I’m looking to expand. Last few cases were tricky ones, and I'd like somepony to watch my back. It’s hard work, but I could use a partner. What do you say?”

My desk made a womph when it finally collapsed, this time from a filly jumping over it. I returned the hug awkwardly, hoping that the sweets inside had survived.

“Thank you, Gum! I’ll help in anyway I can! I feel like we can take on the whole world, right every wrong! Justice to Equestria!”

“… we’re still in school.”

“Yes, well, still. Thank you,” she stood up a little straighter, fixed her hat and nodded. “See you around, Gumshoe.”

And with that, she walked out my office. As I watched her walk away, I couldn’t help but smile. Sure, I didn’t get the case. Treacle was still loose, and I now had to explain to Spike why his cards were now slightly muddy. I stared at my poor desk, then let out a sigh. It came with a smile. For all that went wrong, I now had a partner. More than that, a friend.

I cracked open a new carton, Sweet Apple Acres 100% fresh. The cool liquid hit the tumbler with a plop-clink. I took a moment to savour the smell of those sweet apples before tilting the glass.

The can rang. I gave it a glare after setting the tumbler to one side. The can arrived at my ear as I worked on the desk.

“Hello?”

“Gumdrop, Spike just came over. He left something for you.” The Landpony.

I half listened as I tried to rescue the cookies from certain crumby doom, “Uh-huh.”

“He said that Cheerilee gave him a card from some game. She found it in the cloakroom last Wednesday. He asked me to give it to you, so you can get it to your filly friend. Any idea what it is?”

I stopped, and let a smile appear. Sometimes fate works in weird ways. Sometimes, it all works out fine.

“Also, what’s this I hear about you getting in another fight with Treacle? And why is the kitchen caked in mud again? We’re going to have serious talkings when you get out of that den, mister!”

I did say sometimes.

Comments

[Skywriter]

I love your banter.

[Thought Prism]

This was made for me. The noir style narration contrasts hilariously with the actual content, and I appreciate all the coy TCG references. I will definitely devour any future chapters.

[Scholarly-Cimmerian]

This was glorious. XD I loved it!

[Dorath]

This colt doesn’t need another vice.

My dad already has one in the workshop.