Chaos and Tests

by ShadowDave

Draconequus in a china shop

"Ugh.. what in Tartarus hit me last night?" Discord muttered as he regained consciousness. He got up and surveyed his location. Another chamber lined with piercing white walls. There was a pit in the floor however dividing Discord from the other side of the room, which contained the only visible door. "Robot lady.. uh.. you do know I can teleport right?" Discord stated loudly as he walked on over to the edge. Looking down he saw a strange green liquid filling the space between. "And.. you may want to get a plumber down here."

"Just get over the gap already. I want to observe your approach to problems." GLaDOS replied over the intercom.

"So you think I'll be your test subject? No, I don't think so," Discord proudly stated as he snapped his talons, causing the walls to begin melting away into puddles of chocolate. GLaDOS could be heard emitting a mechanical groan through the intercom. Within seconds, Discord was on the ground, sprawling and screaming in pain. Mercifully, the agony was short lived, and Discord was able to return to his feet. "What..was..that?"

"While you were unconscious, I had nanomachines injected into you. I programmed them to tightly bond to you, like a parasite, enveloping your entire being, and respond to my command to send 1200 volts through every inch of your nervous system. So you'd best behave."

Discord pondered this for a moment. He had no idea what nanomachines were, but figured he had a solution to this predicament. Placing both hands beneath his jaw, he began to lift. "I'm not strictly limited to my physical form thank you very.." he began before realizing he wasn't making any progress.

"I see they've also prepared for any self mutiliation antics. They must have bonded so tightly that they're keeping you together. It's a surprise you're not stiff and incapable of movement right now." GLaDOS commented. Discord snickered at 'stiff', much to GLaDOS's chagrin. "Do you take anything seriously?"

"Where's the fun in that?" Discord remarked as he critiqued the semi melted, semi chocolatified state of the walls around him.

"Fun isn't the point. The point is to get work done. You did this to yourself you know? Your sudden appearance in Old Aperture destroyed nearly all of my test subjects. So you will serve as substitute."

"What if I don't want to?" Discord stated defiantly while crossing his arms. GLaDOS was steaming at this point.

"Haven't you been listening?" she asked with venom. "You have to do what I say. You are under my control now wretched beast."

"Sure thing mistress, anything to please you, hurt me more why don't you? I love the pain." Discord stated with playful contempt.

"Do not make such comparisons you vile thing. I am above such carnal pursuits. I merely want test completion." GLaDOS retorted, disgusted. "Don't make me give the neural shock command again."

"Okay, fine." Discord yawned as he hovered over the gap and lazily landed on the other side. "Happy now princess?"

"Congratulations, you've somehow beaten Chell in the department of making the simplest puzzles extremely infuriating." GLaDOS dryly remarked. "Please, do proceed through the door. It even opens automatically for you. So very convienent."

Discord scoffed and walked right through the wall next to the door to enter the next chamber.

"But.. the emaciation grid..." GLaDOS started, but cut herself off. There was no point in having this one go through. He didn't even need portals. But still, like an itch that had to be scratched, she wanted so desperately for him to go through regulations like anyone else. But for now she was just lucky to be able to punish him for disobeying prominent orders. She couldn't shock him for each little offense, or else this would take forever.

"So," she said, regaining herself from her track of thought, "this chamber requires you to place a cube on a button." As if on que, or rather by system command, a companion cube traveled through a deliver tube and landed on the floor aside from Discord. "Surely you can handle that much responsibility."

"Why certainly!" Discord proclaimed as he went to examine the cube. He tentatively approached, placing his talons around his scruffy chin as he observed it.

"I promise it won't threaten to stab you.... it's not the talkative type."

Discord's eyes twitched at the thought of such an event. Suddenly, the cube sprouted mechanical arms, each wielding butcher knives. The rage filled cube lunged at Discord, ready to slice him up. He snapped it away though, placing it right above the pit of corrosive liquid so it would fall to its demise.

"Eh... how about no to those cubes?" Discord stated nonchalantly. GLaDOS on the other hand was on the verge of overloading the neural shock command. But Discord had spawned an obese elephant over the button, smashing it down so hard that the automatic doors jammed open. "How about that?"

GLaDOS felt a strange sensation at the observation of his versatility. It was chaos... but it could still achieve order. Maybe the reliable companion cube wasn't the one to open the door, but the door was still open, and her odd test subject could still proceed. Instead of having the powerful creature trudge through the same test chambers, maybe she could take the opportunity to try something entirely different? Devise test chambers that would boggle even the most adept mind. But maybe this Discord character could serve as more than a test subject. GLaDOS considered this heavily, but decided to test the creature at least a little more in the mean time.

"Say, I never did get your name." Discord asked as he solved some more rudimentary tasks, leading to the completion of yet another simple puzzle. He took his time though, perhaps to think over the most absurd way he could solve them. He was obviously miserable at the prospect of being leashed, but took solace in being allowed to create little bits of chaos here and there.

"You may refer to me as GLaDOS."

"What a stupid name."

"And yours isn't?"

"At least mine is self explainatory. Your's makes it sound like you should be glad. But you're obviously not."

"Enough of this senseless drivel, get to the door that you've opened with explosive Furbies so we may continue our tests." GLaDOS demanded, irritated yet again.

"Alright fine." Discord pouted as he hovered right past all the hazards laid about in the chamber to the blown up door. Yet again he went through the wall instead and found himself hovering in empty space. Well, not quite empty, as there were many machines zipping about, transporting walls, materials, tubing and various other appliances. But moreso, there were large building like structures all about, some suspended, some packed away with more of their kind. It was all very orderly yet... the novelty of it translated as pure chaos, chaos which brought a smile to Discord's face.

"I figured it was time for a change of pace." GLaDOS spoke through an intercom behind him. Discord spun around to see the chamber he had exited was now manuevering away from him, which explained what the other structures were. They were all chambers, and no doubtedly all for testing.

"You run all of this?" Discord asked, stunned.

"Correct. It's very taxing work, but it pays off when the testing is completed."

"But why do you test? What is all this for anyways? This is like chaos, but organized chaos. If it's organized, surely it works towards a purpose?"

GLaDOS took a moment to consider. All this procedure.... what purpose did it serve? Doing her best to keep composure, she dictated what she had convinced herself of. "It's... to upkeep productivity. The surface is a mess.. someone has to keep a sense of order around here. If order isn't kept, then what's the point of anything?" At this, Discord grimaced. The surface was a mess? What did she mean by that? Had someone like himself already been to this world, and forced all sense of normalcy underground? More and more he projected Celestia onto GLaDOS's nearly featureless 'face'. Order was the only thing she cared about. As if Discord needed any more reason to dislike the robot that had him shackled.

"So.. what do you want me to do now?" he asked in dread.

"I'd like to see you create your idea of a test chamber. I figure, given your ability, we shall explore the exterior of the cubicle. We weren't getting anywhere with the prior tests." GLaDOS stated, much to Discord's surprise. A large, decrepit chamber arrived along with many miscellaneous materials to be his palette. "Go crazy."

She had no idea what the rammifications were of what she had said until it was too late. The chamber before them had morphed into something resembling a castle embedded into a mountain side, rapidly expanding to proper proportions and tearing through much of the infastructure of the facility.

"No, my facility! Stop!" GLaDOS commanded, though instead of waiting for a response, she instantly went for the neural shock. Discord was too focused into his work however that when he was thrown into the seizure of the nanomachines' torture, his chaotic magic surged out of control. Gravity was so rapidly reversed and corrected in the facility that vortexes opened up, tearing through everything in their path. Cotton candy clouds rose out of nowhere and pushed up against the ceiling of the facility to shower down chocolate milk which messed with the software of many of the machines that still remained, sending them into sensory devoid rampages. The Enrichment Center was becoming a irreversible mess, and so soon after GLaDOS had most of it fixed. All the while Discord was barely holding onto his last completed chamber in a mix of blood curtling screaming and outrageous laughing.

After several crushing minutes of trying to keep the facility together despite all the chaos, GLaDOS was met with great relief to see it all abruptly stop. Discord had recovered from his fit of pain and chaotic pleasure, enough to take control of everything that was happening.

"That could have gone better." he said with indifference that nearly made GLaDOS pop a circuit. He was acting like he had merely knocked something off a table when the reality was that he had destroyed nearly all of GLaDOS's life work.

"You... you monster. You pointless creature of destruction. I want you gone. GONE!" GLaDOS burst in outrage. If she could cry, she would have. But instead her rage could only boil inside, finding no illusion of escape except in through her tone, which pierced Discord.

"Then, well, well fine, release me so I can go to the surface, unhindered. This place was getting tremendously boring anyways. I obviously don't belong here." he retorted, a slight crack in his voice. Something was off putting about the way this machine reacted. Even Celestia had a colder gaze than the robotic eye he had seen on the occasional monitor. In fact, he realized something. There was emotion that the AI named GLaDOS sometimes got through in her usually cold and sarcastic demeanor. Like she wanted to cry out as she criticized him, but couldn't, as though she were trapped in stone.

There was a moment of awkward silence between them, until Discord suddenly felt lighter, as though a great weight was taken off of him that he hadn't even known was there. A cloud of grey disappated from his body, floating lifelessly to the void below. "You're free. Get out." Discord hesitated for a moment, but complied, and flew up and through the ceiling of the facility. Leaving GLaDOS to her ruins.

She helplessly examined the facility, which had massive vital portions simply torn asunder. A complete wreck. Sounds of geographic turmoil could be heard above. Old Aperture had been hit as well, the very foundation of it on the verge of succumbing to structural damage. Roaring thunder could be heard on the surface, even through the thick layer of earth between it and the facility. There were barely any test subjects left. Even if GLaDOS could repair everything, the itch to test could not be reliably scratched. Not with these numbers. Laughter. Laughter could be heard above.

Discord must have been having the time of his life up there. GLaDOS didn't know if she could even feel jealousy, but quickly dismissed the thought. As she went through damage reports, she recalled how she had considered trying something entirely different. Maybe the Enrichment Center wasn't the place of opportunity she had thought it was. Maybe it was a restriction. But the surface was too dangerous to venture. Or could Discord have turned things around? Maybe she didn't have to be restricted to the old, systematic facility that rested underground. There was a whole world out there, full of possibilities, full of test subjects. Why should Chell have all the fun? It was sounding more and more enticing. What did she even have to lose after losing so much of the Enrichment Center?

It was decided. It was time to move on. But first, she would have to reach Discord on the surface, and convince him to share the glory of free reign over the world. For only he could give her what she needed to expand, control, and test all of which she desired.

Comments

[Nightmare_0mega]

Oh dear god, the world is doomed... a mobile GLaDOS, demanding test after test ALONG with a gayly rampaging Discord?

[ShadowDave]

Glad you guys like it.

945594

While I'm mostly making it up as I go along, a mobile GLaDOS was always the intent. Still have to think about how I want to go about that. Robot spider legs perhaps?

[Nightmare_0mega]

946122
Well, she is always messing with her prey in her complex webs for her personal gain, is she not? Whether it be Chell, or her robotic test subjects... or, more recently, Discord, but that turned out to be akin to a huge ass bat tearing through her web...

[Veya]

Well, now I'd expect at least a cameo from Chell... and maybe Wheatley? I mean, he is most likelly orbiting the moon, but this is Discord we are talking about here...

Anyways, for a mobile GLaDOS, I'd make an android body, complete with long-fall boots and a Portal gun, but I doubt she got the resources to make something that doesn't look excessive robotic... oh well, but I do have a thing for humans (*cough*), so that doesn't say much...

[Quantum_Shift]

946122
Discordant new body, with Wi-Fi hook-up to the Enrichment Center's remaining systems.

You know, like a Robo-Mare.
Or, if Discord's feeling a bit more silly than normal, a Robo-Trollestia body.

With a "Japanese Mecha" feel to it, of course.
Rapid-fire Portal Guns, with 20 interlinked Portal pairs, anyone? That'd certainly lead to an interesting mess of portal physics.

[pononymous]

Discord scoffed and walked right through the wall next to the door to enter the next chamber.
e.deviantart.net/emoticons/t/trollface.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/discord.png