• Published 10th Oct 2018
  • 2,788 Views, 179 Comments

Üā Sūt Cktüis (How to be Dragon) - Rammy



After failing to teach Spike how to fly Twilight asks for Dragon Lord Ember help fill in her gaps of 'dragonish' knowledge. Whom Ember sends in response will send shock waves through Equestria and beyond...

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Chapter 22 Thoüavēts Zrēüsūtze (Overdue Confession)

The dragon is not the body but the spirit ~ Unknown


Twilight paced outside the hospital's isolation room muttering as she tried to think of another plan to get through the warding enchantments. She would normally be geeking out over how sturdy they were as this one was proving to be even better than the one she used in her lab, but she needed to get in before it was too late! Unfortunately, so far, all she had managed to do so was crack the wall a bit. Worse still, she could feel every attempt becoming increasingly more difficult as her exhaustion rose. If only she hadn't spent all night desperately scouring every inch of the Crystal Archives for anything that might give her a clue, a hint, anything to ending the threat that was Šizra, then, maybe, she might have enough energy to break through!

To add to her frustration, it wasn't like she could ask for one of the staff to give her the 'key' that would allow her to lower the enchantment as she had scared everypony away some time ago. She was going to be giving out a lot of Apologies after this... but getting into that room was more important right now!

The sound of hooves galloping caught her attention and she looked back to see Shining Armor, Cadance and Captain 'Lancer', the later of which she she now knew to be the changeling Pharynx coming down the hall. After all this was over, she was going to be having a very long talk with her brother, sister-in-law, and the two changeling brothers. At least she now had some help...

"Twilley what is going on?" Shining Armor asked as he scrambled to a stop, eyeing the cracked wall warily.

"Spike is trying to revive Šizra with a blood ritual!" Twilight cried out as she continued her pacing.

"What!?" All three cried out.

"Then what are we doing standing out here?!" Pharynx yelled.

"This is an mana isolation room." Shining Armor explained. "We need a 'key' from one of the staff to drop the enchantment so we can enter."

"Well that's just great!" Pharynx growled out. "With the amount of lingering fear I can sense..."

Twilight tried to not grit her teeth. If only she had not been as crazed maybe... Wait... She stopped as she felt mana flowing out from one of the cracks. It look like the crack was substantial enough to weaken the enchantment in that spot to allow mana to flow through. If she could somehow expand this crack maybe then... And just like that, she had an idea that just might work. "Shiny are you able to make a shield small enough to fit into this crack?"

Shining Armor looked at the wall, then Twilight, and finally back to the wall. She could see the gears spinning in his head as he did. "You want me to expand a shield inside the crack?"

"Exactly."

Shining Armor shrugged then walked up to the wall and started to examine it, muttering as he did. Twilight could hear snippets of spell formulas, some of which, to her surprise, if she heard right, even she would struggle through. But then again, most were related to precision and control and she always struggled with precision and control.

"Back up." Shinning suddenly ordered, his horn lighting up.

Twilight backed down the hall along with Cadance and Pharynx and watched as a several pink lines shot out of Shining's horn and into the wall. Moments passed with nothing to show other then an increasing straining Shining. She was about to tell him to stop when she heard the tell tale sounds of crystal cracking. She barely managed to pull up a shield around the three of them before the wall in front of Shining exploded.

When Twilight reopened her eyes, to her relief, Shining seemed to be unharmed if a bit dazed. She rushed over to see if he had succeeded and nearly cried out in triumph. There was a sizeable hole in the wall, big enough to easily fit through. She carefully stepped through the hole mindful of all the crystal shards that scattered the floor whicg could easily pierce the frog of her hooves.

"By the Eternal Hive..." Twilight glanced back to see that Pharynx had followed her in with Shining and Cadance close behind.

She didn't know exactly what the expression the disguised changeling had said exactly meant but she had to agree with the sentiment. The room was a terrifying sight to behold. The air tasted of iron and ozone, thick with the oppressive weight of mana and there, nearly the size of the entire room, was as, she had knew would be the case, a circle of blood with several other geometrical shapes along its inside edge.

In the center the ritual circle was Spike and Šizra. Spike was looking at her, his eyes glowing white, his left paw grasping Šizra's muzzle. "Be at peace..." He spoke, his voice sounding as if thousands were speaking through him. "Young Twilight Spar..."

Twilight merely blinked as mid-word Spike's voice cut out and his suddenly slumped over like a puppet having its strings cut. The way Spike had sounded and acted, it almost seemed like he was possessed by someone or something... Of course, given the use of that kind of magic it was most likely an eldritch horror of some kind... but why would a creature like them tell her to be at peace?

Once again she found herself debating, unsure whether or not to approach the passed out dragon. She wanted to check on him but crossing a ritual circle held risks and it wasn't like she could just merely destroy it either. To begin with, it was not a ritual circle she was familiar with, and it had also been made with blood. There were just too many unknowns... The doctors, whom she hadn't noticed until now, however, seemed to have no such reservations and rushed in to check on the two. She bit her lip as she continued to debate for a few more seconds more before breathing out a puff of air deciding to go 'buck it' and join them.

Twilight quickly went about looking for signs of any dark mana corruption, lingering or otherwise on Spike, leaving Šizra to the doctors. But to her confusion, the more she examined him the more she found nothing. Even checking over Šizra, who seemed to be the same, minus the silvery mark that look suspiciously like Spike's left paw on his face she found no detectable traces. Even if they managed to stop the ritual before it was completed she should have found at least some amount of corruption.

"Twi...light?" Twilight suppressed a shiver as Spike suddenly whispered, his voice no longer sounding strange, merely tired.

"What have you done?!" She muttered, staring away at Šizra, unable to look Spike in the eyes. She didn't want to see the corruption that would surely be in his eyes.

"Whoa..." Spike whispered in awe as he reached down with his left claw and hesitantly touched the mark on Šizra's muzzle. "The CktüisLežothīzs mark... cool."

The what mark? 'Cool!?' Twilight thought as she finally looked at Spike fully. His green eyes were wide open in amazement. It was to her mild relief that she saw that his eyes appeared to be clear of dark magic, but she also knew that it didn't mean that the corruption wasn't there. "This is serious! You tried to revive Šizra using dark magic... necromancy! Do you have any idea of what that does?! Never mind that it's a crime that carries a mandatory life banishment to Tartarus!"

"That wasn't necromancy... at least, I don't think it was..." Spike shook his head as he rose. "Šihzra Vairozs' spirit was... shattered... the dragon and the pony were destroying each other... Or something like that... honestly it was all a bit of a blur... Maybe Šihzra will explain better when he awakens..."

"When!?" Twilight screeched looking at unconscious hybrid in horror.

"Well." Spike sighed sadly, "I suppose 'if' is still a possibility but I shall hope for when."

"Well I hope for never..." Twilight muttered bitterly under her breath. She really hoped that Spike's hope for Šizra's recovery would fail. It needed to... because this monster... but... sadly she had also personally witnessed Šizra with injuries that should have killed him several times over, and yet, despite everything known about medicine, had more then survived. A small part of her, that she would never admit to, could not help but acknowledge that this would likely turn out to be a repeat of the last time.

"You are just like him." Spike said looking at her, his head tilted to the side.

Twilight jaw dropped. She could not believe what her ears had just heard. "I am not like Šizra."

"No, not Šihzra Vairozs," Spike scoffed, rolling his eyes, "Spike."

"But, you are Sp-" Twilight started to say automatically.

"I am done with this bullshit." Spike roared, taking Twilight by the throat and throwing her into the far wall. She didn't even make it to the floor before Spike was looming over her, his swords unsheathed, crossed, and pressed against her neck. "The next time you fucking call me Spike will be the last fucking word you speak before you stand before The Voice for eternal judgement!"

Twilight breath hitched and she felt her heart nearly beat out of her chest as Spike stared down at her growling with the promise of murder in his eyes. Wisps of green flames leaked out of his mouth with every fang on full display. In that moment, she knew that she was going to die. And with that thought, her fraying psyche snapped and she fainted dead away.


Not-Spike panted hard as he attempted to get his anger under control. Why couldn't Twilight just let it go!? But then again, between the way Šihzra went about 'explaining' who he was and his own muddled mind he couldn't fully blame her either. Maybe with his mind finally feeling like it was beginning to feel clear...

His thoughts were derailed when Pharynx, if Not-Spike remembered correctly, in a single telekinetic motion lifted his swords away from Twilight's neck while simultaneously spinning him away from her and slamming him into one of the intact walls. He would have been impressed even if he hadn't bared witness to Šihzra Vairozs sparing against Index. Pharynx had some skill, but he was no where near the level as Šihzra.

"I may look like one, but I am no soft hearted, peace loving pony. I will not hesitate to use lethal force." Hissed Pharynx, pressing one of Not-Spike's own swords against his throat lightly. "So, threaten a pony again, I dare you..."

Not-Spike sighed sadly looking away from the angry guard. This day had gone from a clusterfuck to a triumph only to be twisted back into a clusterfuck. If only he had just sat down and really explain exactly who he was, but his mind had been in such a jumble from not only the Pull but all those flashes of memories from Spike. And then, of course, (because it always had to be 'of course') the one time, the one time, it had cleared up enough to be able to put his thoughts in order so he could explain everything got derailed by a glowing magic butt tattoo.

Not-Spike resisted the urge to gulp as the pressure from his sword upon his neck increased. Apparently his turbulent emotions in response to the disguised changeling's threat had only angered him even more. He could speak the recall command that Šihzra enchanted into the sword to teleport it back into its scabbard, but he also knew that it was highly likely Pharynx would end his life before he could finish a single syllable. "I don't know what kind of game are you and Šihzra up to but rest assured..."

"What did you mean earlier when you claimed that 'Spike' sacrificed himself so you could live?'" Both Not-Spike and Pharynx blinked before turning their gazes over to Cadance. Pharynx had shifted his head only slightly just enough to make sure that Cadance could his see hardening glare while still keeping a sharp eye on the dragon.

Not-Spike took advantage of the slight distraction and whispered under his breath the recall phrase startling Pharynx who backed away when his sword suddenly disappeared from his neck only to appear back in its scabbard on his back. With the immediate threat gone he lifted a single claw to let Cadance know he needed a moment before answering. He then licked a claw before slowly leaning down and sticking it into to one Twilight's ears before twisting it. As expected the sudden cold wetness on a sensitive part of the body was enough to surge Twilight back from unconsciousness with a yelp and a flurry of limps as she simultaneously scrambled to get up on to her hooves before trying to clean her suddenly slimy ear with a hoof.

"I hated you... I hated Spike." He began, not giving Twilight anytime to protest the rude waking, "And Spike hated me. Despised me like I was some sort of monster! He did everything possible to buried me, to smash me down, to kill me if-"

"WHAT!?" Twilight yelled in protest, her hoof dropping away from her ear in her shock. "Spike would never-"

"Shut. Up." Not-Spike hissed, glaring at Twilight, daring her to faint again. But when she did not he snorted before continuing as if Twilight hadn't interrupted him. "See, this is what I mean by you are just like Spike: a defiant sanctimonious, self righteous, know-it-all, proudful hypocrite! Perfectly willing to let innocent thinking sentient creature suffer and die an excruciating death because you were too proud to admit you don't know fuck."

"But... I... I..."

"Do you recall the of day of Spike's birthday induced greed growth?"

"Yes... but what-"

"My first coherent moment was you waving, what you claimed to be, an incredible broom in front of me." Not-Spike gave a fake smile as he reminisced before letting it fall as he added, "...It was a pretty shitty broom."

"But can't you see that could only mean..." Twilight began, gesturing wildly.

"Not Spike!" Not-Spike snapped then sighed, "I get that I look and sound like the Great and Honorable Spike the Brave and Glorious, gah that is a mouthful, but I am not him... I never was..."

"Then who..." Cadance began to ask while putting a placating hoof on Twilight who had devolved back to stammering single syllables every few seconds.

Not-Spike interrupted with a raised palm and a shake of his head. "First of all, to know my name is to know me. All of me... Down to the very ends of my being. So please, do not ask for my name again."

"Okay..." Cadance softly spoke. "What do you like to be called then?"

"Eh, I figured that if the Crystal Ponies loved to ham it up with Spike I figured, why not?!" Not-Spike shrugged, smirking a bit.
"And so, Guardian Dragon of the Crystal Ponies! Guardian for short as guardian is what I am."

"'Guardian." Pharynx sneered. "Your name is literally 'Guardian!?'"

"No," Guardian grumbled as he pinched his brow. He had just said that he wasn't going to give them his name, name! Why would... "Guardian is not my name, it's more of a... title."

Guardian sighed as he rubbed both his hands up and down his face. He knew it was going to be difficult but not this difficult! He was going to have such a headache after this...

"Wait, wait..." Shining spoke for the first time since he first stepped into the isolation room. "If you're not Spike how was it that your first coherent memory was during Spike's... uh... birthday? I read the reports and there were no other dragons anywhere near the area of Ponyville on that day."

"I guess you could say I was the sleeping dragon within..." Guardian answered, rolling his eyes at Twilight mouthing a silent 'see!' "Oh for the love of The Voice Twilight! Spike and I were two different beings! We influenced each other but we had different emotions, thoughts, and memories!"

"When I awoke that day all I knew was that there were certain things were important and precious. Things that needed, had to be, protected. I didn't know exactly what it was but for my troubles I was assailed both physically and verbally and then kept having what I thought was my treasures stolen. All I wanted was to protect! I didn't know... I didn't know it was the wrong way to hoard, to protect, to guard... how could I? I was just..."

"You were merely a child..." Guardian nodded, letting a bit of a smile break through at Cadance's realization even though it wasn't exactly correct.

"But instead of understanding that and teaching me I was labeled a beast... A MONSTER!!" Guardian roared angrily.

"Spike's only thoughts of me was was fear and hatred." He continued with a low growl. "He hated anything about being a dragon because every exposure to something that was uniquely dragon it was negative and then reinforced by the culture he was raised under that saw dragons as these greedy fire breathing beasts that burn down whatever they can't steal and then would rather kill and eat you then have a civilized conversation! So he felt he had to do anything and everything to suppress the part of him that was screaming out in need to hoard to protect what he treasures less he was became what he wrongly feared... And those feelings became so strong that he managed to tap into the innate magic of dragons... the pain..."

"Ever had a child?" Guardian glanced at the two mares in turn, noting that only Cadance nodded. "The pain I felt was worse. Ever been dared to hold your breath to the point of passing out? Imagine that moment just before passing out the burning of your lungs, the darkness slowly closing in but being stretched out..." He felt no satisfaction as the horror slowly appeared on their faces. Even though in the end he and Spike came to an understanding he couldn't help but still be bitter about the suffering he went through. "I continuously felt myself slowing slipping, slowly dying and could do nothing... It was tortuous."

The drake looked away unable to continue. He knew that Spike didn't understand then what he truly was doing but the memories of those days were still so raw.

"No, no, no..." Twilight screeched out, shaking her head fiercely. "No! I refuse to believe... No, you are lying or something... Šizra made you say that! It has to be I-"

"And here is that fucking denial again." Guardian ground out through a tightly clinched jaw. "Yes, Spike tried to kill 'me.' But he didn't know what he was doing. He, too, after a manner of speaking, was a child. A child scared out of his mind who just wanted what was scaring him to go away..."

"What he didn't know, what no one knew but Šihzra Vairozs, was that if I died, so would he... but the thing is... the thing is..." Guardian chocked up, his throat seemingly closing up. Now that it was time to reveal Spike's fate to those that loved him, he found himself able to find the words explain to them that Spike was gone, gone, that he didn't even exist anymore...

"It's okay Guardian." Cadance soothed. "Deep breaths... deep breaths..."

Guardian nodded and did as he was told and then the words finally came out of his mouth. "A flame needs a spark to start, to live. Dragons are of fire and flame. I flame, Spike spark. In order for me to truly live, Spike had to spark me into life. But a spark is a momentary thing and is doomed appear for a flash and then to cease existing. Such is the nature of the spark that ignites a flame. And such is the nature of all dragons..."

"Are you saying that Spike..." Cadance whispered out, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

Guardian almost could not look at the gathered ponies (and changeling). He could see the dam of grief especially on Twilight, who had been looking more and more frazzled as time had gone on, was about to burst. "All that remains of Spike are scattered fragments of fading memories... and the name he chose deeply etched into my spirit..."

And with that admission the ponies, minus Twilight over the edge into full on grief. The disguised changeling himself merely closed his eyes and looked away. Guardian looked at the only pony that was defiant, Twilight and sighed. He didn't know what he could say to her as he was out of words at the moment. But then suddenly a memory bubbled up to the forefront of his mind.

"Funny thing is... Šihzra Vairozs never actually told Spike anything..." Guardian humph once in mild amusement. "Not a single thing about dragons the entire time he was... held. Except, that I needed a name... and he never told him the true consequences... But... Well, the thing is... in the end... I almost think Spike knew... knew what it really meant to give me a name... It was just something in his final words to me that... well, actually, his finals words weren't for me but for you, Twilight Sparkle-"


"Do you know why dragons roar?"

Not-Spike grumbled in response to Hermit Sage's question. They both damn well knew that he didn't know, so why did the Hermit Sage even ask? Never mind it was he that first asked a question! The Hermit Sage was always doing this! Answering a question with a question of his own that never seemed to be related to the question first asked. And worst of all, he knew it, unlike all his other questions, was a question that Index would be of zero help. That meant he had no choice but to play along with the smug bastard and admit. "No, Hermit Sage, I do not."


Guardian quickly reached out and gently but firmly took a hold of Twilight's horn, which was now spewing out massive amounts of mana. He grunted as his paw quickly grew very warm from massive amount of raw mana that was continually pouring out from it. With his other arm, and some help of his wings, he gently but firmly wrapped himself around the now squirming pony. He was finding himself very thankful to having spent several weeks with Lord Spinster learning to how capture the monstrously massive snakes that lived in the deep jungles north of the Nether Wastes to milk them for their venom that he knew how to safely hold a squirming body with ease. 'Though given that Twilight possessed four legs and two wings she was proving to be slightly more difficult.

"I'm sorry it took so long to remember..." Guardian whispered, gently stoking Twilight's head with his chin, his words barely heard over the wails of the grieving alicorn, who in turn only wailed louder before becoming muffled as she buried her head into the crook of his arm.

In the corner of his eye, just barely visible, he could make out a dim flashing light down near Twilight's flank. Looking down he could see Twilight's cutie mark flashing rhythmically just like it had back in that crystal tree house. He wasn't completely sure of the meaning, vague flashes from Spike's now nearly faded away memories, but irregardless he had a strong feeling that things were beginning to turn around for the grieving alicorn still held tightly in his grasp.


"Harlothisüa Lruthithieüs?"

The newly named dragon spirit looked down to see Spike, his form difficult to see within an inferno of green flame.

"Think you do me one last favor?" Spike said, rubbing the back of his head. "Twilight can be a bit neurotic... okay, completely neurotic... The thing is... If I know Twilight, and I do, she is going to blame herself... that she failed me somehow... she never did... I don't envy future you, but please help her understand... I know I am asking a lot, but she... She needs to know..."

Harlothisüa Lruthithieüs blinked when Spike stopped speaking, wondering if too much of Spike had burned away but then he heard Spike's voice softly start to speak again. "Harlothisüa Lruthithieüs, tell my sister that I love her with all my heart always..."

Whatever the rest of what Spike said (if he said anything else) was lost as the heat and light from Spike's spirit burning away completely overwhelmed Harlothisüa Lruthithieüs. The next thing he was saw was a shattered cloudless sky, pink crystal leaves gently swaying in a non-existent breeze.

Author's Note:

And I swear if I misplaced a Spike, Not-Spike, Guardian, Šihzra, or Šizra I am going to scream bloody murder!

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