Order by Destruction

by All Art Is Quite Useless

Curious Minds Rarely Listen

Soooo, Rainbow chimed, her tone upbeat, only physically betrayed by the gaiety of her stride, Does this mean I'm a magician now?

Well, actually--

Think about it! Rainbow cut in, her eyes settled on a portrait depicting the distant Roque Mountain Range, a place inhabited by pony colonists, and a slew of other creatures. I bet I could have a really cool nickname, like 'The Great Illusionist, Rainbow Flash!

Luna rolled her eyes. You are not a magician by any means, Rainbow Dash. At least, not yet.

Rainbow's eyes widened as she turned to face Luna. "You mean I will be one?! Brutal! Oh please tell me I can make fireballs, that would be so freakin' cool!"

"Rainbow!" Luna barked, eyes shifting left and right, searching for a witness. "From this point forwards, please assume we are never alone, and speak sparsely of such things. If you must communicate out loud, do so quietly."

"Heh, sorry, princess," Rainbow quivered, averting her eyes, "I wasn't really thinking," she squeaked, voice cracking.

"We urge you to consider your words in future," Luna mouthed, before switching her means of communication. In answer to your question, yes, you are likely capable of conjuring a fireball, given enough practice.

Rainbow's face began shining with glee, with an extra spring in her step, she began to perform something between a trot and a skit down the corridor. Luna barely heard her squeal the words "So. Cool!"

But it shaln't be easy. Unicorns are born with a means to channel their innate magical talent, the other races are not.
Where, pray tell, has your enthusiasm for magic come from, we wonder? It does not seem fitting to you.

Rainbow's eyebrows were straight as a sword. Let's just say there's a certain loudmouth unicorn I'd love to settle a score with. I can already imagine the look on her face! All 'whoah, how the heck did you do that?' and stuff, it'd be priceless!

Luna only had to think for a moment to realise who Rainbow might have been referring to. Does the unicorn you refer to happen to go by 'The Great and Powerful Trixie', by any chance?

Rainbow blushed, and her legs briefly appeared to lock up. H-how did you know?

Believe us, Twilight Sparkle thought it necessary to speak of her at length during our sister's last soiree, as if the letters hadn't already told us enough. Luna suppressed a physical sigh.

Yeah, well, she's a piece of work. I'm not surprised Twilight had a lot to say about her.

Luna couldn't help but smirk at this. That isn't how it came across. Besides, if you despise her so, why have you taken such inspiration from her stage name?

Rainbow cocked her head, now floating beside Luna. I don't follow.

Luna chuckled, glancing at Rainbow. 'The Great Illusionist, Rainbow Flash'? How very original, forsooth.

Hey, thanks! Rainbow smiled.

Luna's eyes bulged as she pushed back a heartier laugh. That wasn't a compliment, Rainbow. There's literally a syllable's difference, and the first two words are identical. If we knew any better we'd think you were aspiring to be like Trixie.

Pfft, h-hell no! Rainbow glared, I-I just don't know many magician names, alright? And I was hardly gonna call myself 'Rainbow the Bearded', was I?

Luna retained a catlike grin, deciding to push a little further. As we've told you, you're hardly a magician yet. Even so, you wish to track this pony down, and then what, challenge her to a battle of spells?

Well, maybe, Rainbow hesitated, Uhh, I've not really thought it through much, I guess.

Really? Because it seemed to be the first thing to cross your mind when you found out you could possibly perform spells. Be honest, Rainbow, is it indeed a matter of wounded pride that gave you this idea, or a hidden desire?

Rainbow spluttered hard. "Pfblghttt! W-What? With Trixie? Are you nuts?! I don't freakin' like her! I think she's a total charlatan with a stick up her flank, and it's about time someone showed her up!"

"Relax, Rainbow Dash, we are not serious." Luna grinned wide, watching Rainbow's disbelieving twitches. "You thought the Princess of the Night incapable of humour, did you not?"

"Th-that wasn't funny!" Rainbow Dash all but yelled, hugging her forehooves to her chest as if she had been wounded, her tone petulant and sour.

"Then we will exercise more caution in future, forgive us."

"It's fine, no biggie. Anyways, you wanna know why I could never be like Trixie?"

"Please, we're all ears."

"Well," Rainbow grinned, "I don't think I could take myself seriously if I spoke in the third pony all the time. Like seriously, who does that?"

Luna snickered at this. "The third pony, hmm? Yes that does sound preposterous."

Rainbow looked about to laugh before she didn't. "Wait, what?"

"You sought offend us, did you not? We do not speak in the third pony, Rainbow, but the first. What you are bearing witness to is majestic pluralisation, it is used by those who speak for a nation, most commonly. Try harder next time."

"But, you're not speaking for a nation all the time, are you?" Rainbow mused, choosing to ignore Luna's last remark.

"We always have our subjects in mind," Luna rebutted.

"But don't ya ever say anything for yourself? Just for Luna, I mean?"

"Well, we suppose we do, ofttimes we engage in private discourse, and our opinions are our own. We have not thought of it in this way before."

"You sure there isn't more to it than that?" Rainbow eyed Luna as she spoke, noticing how taut her face had become.

"Most certainly, yes."

Although their pace had not changed at all, speaking aloud brought them to the end of the corridor swiftly, and they soon emerged into the royal gardens, their lavishness spanning as far as the eye could see.

Well trimmed hedges broke to allow entrance to one of the garden's many sections, a small metal door-less gate sat overhead between the gap, its gaps colonised by entwining vines and dark petals. To the left, a cobblestone path led to countless other displays of the garden's opulence, and beyond the small entrance, which appeared to sit in harmony with nature, a veritable sea of colour exploded in vibrant and fantastic hues which might have made Rainbow's mane look usual in comparison.

While Luna was sure that Rainbow had seen small areas of the garden before, during the gala, this was likely her first time witnessing one of its central facets in the light of day. Her amazement was unprecedented for both of them, accompanied with a small gasp on Rainbow's part, and it warmed Luna's heart.

Luna outwardly considered that the brash speedster enjoying nature's gifts was an unusual sight, and a surprising revelation, but rather than chide Luna for having such a thought, Rainbow indulged her. Flittering her wings and taking to the air, she dipped and dived along the surfaces of the familiar landscape, her eyes alight.

It was only when Rainbow began sniffing a patch of flowers, her back arched, her hooves lightly shifting her weight back and forth and her tail swishing, that Luna could no longer contain her laughter.

Rainbow froze as she retracted her muzzle from the bed of flowers, feeling Luna's eyes trained on her, and in her alarm, feel straight on her haunches. "Uhh, heheheh... Ahem, I happen to like flowers, 'kay?"

"We were saying nothing on it, dear Rainbow. Our gardens are quite magnificent, are they not?"

"Yeahhhh, they're something alright," Rainbow hovered above, taking in her surroundings, "Honestly, last time I was here, I was spending so much time trying to impress the Wonderbolts that I didn't really get a chance to take this place in," she snapped out of it, "I mean, not that I would have rather been here, the Wonderbolts are way more rad than some garden."

Luna raised an eyebrow. "Rad? We haven't heard this one."

"W-What?" Rainbow gawked, "You know, rad! Cool, extreme, killer, sick, badass, awesome!"

Luna nodded, speaking in a serious tone. "Ah, of course, rad, how could we not have guessed? However, if these Wonderbolts are in fact so rad, why should Equestria's fastest flyer have to compete for their attention?"

Rainbow pensively rubbed a pair of hooves together. "When you put it like that, it does sound weird, I guess."

"Our sister informed us just this morning that you in fact saved three member's lives whilst performing your signature sonic rainboom? Surely this is an achievement worthy of attention and gratitude, why should you need to impress them further?"

Rainbow flashed a wide grin as soon as Luna mentioned her heroics, one that turned to a grimace by the end of her sentence. "I don't think it's that simple, really," Rainbow angled her head so she was looking directly down at Luna. "You ever heard of nepotism?"

Luna scoffed, gazing up at Rainbow, her tail billowing like a flag in the wind, with incredulity. "You us asking me, a being many thousands of years your elder, if we have heard of nepotism? We were alive when the word was coined."

"Hey, you didn't know what 'rad' meant, I had to be sure!"

"Rad is different," Luna pouted.

"Anyways, if you know what I mean then surely you know my problem. Me publicly saving Spitfire's life like that kinda works to my detriment. I mean sure, she's gonna be grateful and all, but she probably can't be seen to be playing favourites by instantly accepting my applications, which is probably why I've yet to hear anything from them." Rainbow's voice sounded weaker as she spoke, with half the lilt and twice the squeak.

Luna nodded, then did a double take. "You mean to say that you've sent multiple applications? Our sister claimed you to be the fastest flier in Equestria, and I trust her judgment. If these mooncalves cannot see that, they are misguided."

"Well," Rainbow said in a small voice, "Fastest doesn't always mean best. I mean, I know I'm clumsy sometimes and stuff, and--"

"Rainbow, stop. We have heard tales of your feats, and we have faith in you, as does our sister. Are you telling us that we are wrong to trust her judgment? Besides, we have been told that you exude confidence, live up to those words."

Rainbow's tail twitched as her voice regained its usual strength, bolstered by Luna's words. "I guess you're right, princess. But still, if you really trust Celestia's judgment so much, why haven't you talked to her about the--"

Do not speak of it here! Luna bellowed, an ethereal echo bounding across Rainbow's mind.

"Augahh!" Rainbow flew back in fright, almost landing in a nearby rosebush. Shaking, she flapped her wings hard to gain height, causing the nearby foliage to blow around tremulously, as if it was barely attached to the earth below.

Luna sighed, before beckoning Rainbow over with a hoof.

Rainbow eyed Luna apprehensively before looking away, pretending not to see her summons.

"Rainbow, land before us."

"Uhh, I-I will in a sec, p-princess!" Rainbow's best attempt at a chipper tone was unconvincing. "Just getting my balance back!"

"Rainbow Dash, Land. You are bleeding."

Comments

[Grey Goat Gal]

Bleeding is not a good sign.

[Crack-Fic Casey]

That last line sounds really ominous. Was that intentional?

[All Art Is Quite Useless]

8282553
It typically isn't!
8283178
It does, doesn't it? Everything's intentional, my friend! Hope you're enjoying so far.

AAIQU

[Ice Star]

This is odd. Surreal. But those are the kind of things I like, and I like the characterization of Luna and Rainbow in this story, and how they play off one another. This is probably my favorite story by you thus far, and I really hope you continue it.