Pinkie Pie: Saint of Manehattan

by Thunder Chaser

Blood Manes Beginning

The package arrived at Pinkies Door in a fashionable white box with Raritys trademark signature on the lid. Pinkie had had some second thoughts about her idea, but they were swept away as she tried on the midnight black latex suit in front of the mirror. The latex was so black and shiny it was reflective and contrasted with Pinkies pink skin and newly Red Mane. Zippers lined the suit and Pinkie began loading some of her weapons, one stiletto knife, pepperspray, brass hooves and finally 9 ninja stars, into the multiple pockets on her body. Finally her plain deep red mask finished the look, making her a fierce looking crime fighting machine. She had to admit, she looked pretty tough and the latex allowed her curves to show through.

She said "I look good!" excitedly as she snuck out of her apartment through the fire escape and slinked as subtly as the wacky pony could to The Lamplight, a seedy bar on the southeast side of Manehattan. Once she was outside the establishment, nervousness filled her body as the winos left the bar. One pony, Lucky was trying to pick a fight with her when she simply said "Sorry I dont have the time" and kicked open the door of the bar. The crowd of drug addicts, dealers, loan sharks and other scum looked at the strange pony and stared in silence. She announced "Im here to find my freind Derpy Hooves. If you can give me any tips at all you might make it out of here without being carried home in a bucket!" One nasty smelling Stallion said "She came in a latex suit, I came in my shorts!" and began laughing horribly. Bloodmane stormed towards the chuckling perverted excuse for a Stallion and punched him square in the snout. "Ladies and Gentleponies, I have just broken this Stallions snout." she than held him up by his neck and yelled "Where is she!"
"I dont know, honestly!" she angrily slammed his body onto a table, breaking it in half. "We can go all night everyone!" she said

The night continued until the bartender said "Look here uuuuhh...Blood Mane. I heard some gossip from a few customers that she was bing held in the old Gem Warehouse, now will you please stop needlessly hurting my customers and get out of here!" Bloodmane dropped a wino onto the floor, and said "Alright weve made some progress, Ill leave you human cockroaches while I go out an actually positively help the community." Bloodmane said leaving the place in a huger mess than it was before. She felt mildly guilty for needlessly injuring seven men in the bar, but was more overcome by excitement by the new information. She quickly ran 4 blocks until she reached the warehouse. Four gangsters surrounded the front, walking around with baseball bats and 2x4s in a menacing fashion. Pinkie Pie began to feel weak but pulled a cupcake out of one of her zippers and began munching it down, feeling stronger much like Popeye eating a can of spinach. She stealthily climbed on top of a nearby fence, rousing noponies suspicions. One guard said to the other"Dude did you see the season 2 finale"

"Yeah dude it was frickin amazing!" he said filled with passion.
Dude whats that!" Pinkie Pie leaped down from the fence, Party cannon in tow stating "I never leave home without my party cannon!" She blasted it at the two guards, the pieces of confetti obtaining enough force from the blast to knock them back and puncture the skin causing horrific damage as the flaming pieces melted onto their fresh cuts. The other two guards rushed towards Bloodmane. The first attempted to strike Bloodmanes skull with a bat but she crawled between his legs before crazily leaping behind him and punching the back of his head with her brass hooves, knocking him out. The second struck her in the kneecaps when she was distracted, producing a sickening "Craaack" as she fell to the ground, the guard stomping on her skull with her boots, her mind fading out as the blood from her head began to mat her red mane. A voice in her head said "So this is how it ends huh Pinkie, you on your knees while your friend Derpy gets killed, huh some pony you are!"
"It wont end this way!" Bloodmane screeched as she bounded up, the pain in her knees soaring as she reached in one of her pockets for a stiletto knife, she galloped backwards, whipping her knife sideways through the air into the stomach, causing him to kneel over in both pain and fear for his life, He began sputtering blood and screaming "Please,Please dont kill me, ill change my ways, ill start going to church, Ill pay you, just please, please dont kill me!"
"Pathetic, you can beat me within an inch of my life but once your fate is closed you begin crying. You disgust me, I should feed you to my pet alligator!"
"Oh god no please, please, I am so sorry!" he said, his crying reaching a whole new level of embarassing. Apparently he didn't know that Bloodmanes pet gator was a baby and toothless.
"Look here, your going to tell me where their holding Derpy, and afterwards we will see how you fare." She picked him up off the ground and with her knife at his throat, he led the way inside the labyrinth of the warehouse. Curiously there were no guards throughout their walk. Suddenly she was led through a door marked "Danger Biohazard!" It led onto a large balcony above a floor which Derpy was seated upon, her trademark eyes looking more sad and confused than ever before. A huge Unicorn was punching Derpy in the face, screaming "Where is it!, you better talk or ill have to punish you the long, hard way again"
Bloodmane winced while Derpy said "Look here Muscles, im done delivering drugs for the Trixie Mob Family, im looking for a new job now. I have no idea what the source of steroid-900 is!"
"Well you were always the one who delivered my Juice, when a Unicorn loses his magic what choice does he have other than to start doing steroids and beating anyone who opposes you and your gang to hell!" he yelled with both anger and a tinge of sadness.

Bloodmane said, "I dont want you to try spoiling my plan now so im going to put you into this here freezer until I finish up."
He nodded fearfully as she threw the bleeding stallion into a tall meat freezer,to sit among-st the cow heads. Bloodmane put the silencer on her pistol and shot out the hanging light.
"Hey who turned out the lights?!" Muscles asked into the air stupidly.
A voice emanated seemingly from nowhere "This is your singing telegram, I hope I find you well, because im beating you straight to hell!"
Muscles turned around in fear to see Bloodmanes evilly smiling face, before her brass hooves rocked both his right jaw, dislocating it immediately and knocking out some teeth. He lunged back saying "Mmmm,mmm,mmm do you smell what im cooking" bursting into a rather fast sprint for his size, seizing her by her arms and whipping her through the air,slamming her into a support beam. Excruciating pain filled her chest and head as her ears rang from the impact. She quickly got up, running away from Muscles for a little bit as she walked off the pain. She leaped onto a nearby crate full of meat products and bounced onto the light fixture.
"Come on down from there you freak!" Muscles screamed

Bloodmane tossed tow of her stars at Muscles, The first missed, the second found its place in his arm.
"Ouch!" he yelled as he ripped the star out of his arm before placing it in his mouth and biting it. He picked up a near by sledge hammer and with eagle eyed precision, knocked her off of the fixture, the hammer cracking her ribs before she fell face first onto the meat crate, breaking the whole crate, leaving a mess of timber and splattered meat. She slowly tried to recover only to have Muscles pick her up off the ground over his head, preparing the slam her onto the ground, as she was held tight in his arms he began saying "How dare you come onto MUSCLESES turf, kill MUSCLESES men and try to kill MUSCLES without getting destroyed? I run everything here on the Lower East Manehattan and soon ill run it all. Your just another tallymark on my board!!!!!!!" he yelled, feeling so awesome he forgot how close he was to where Derpy was tied up. With every ounce of strength Derpy kicked Muscles straight into the crotch, forcing him to drop Bloodmane onto the ground as he turned away and slapped Derpy in the face in his stupid, impassioned fashion giving Bloodmane the time to reach for her pistol and shoot Muscles's knee caps, forcing him to fall to the floor, biting his lower lip.

"This is what happens when you hurt my freinds!!!" she yelled forcing her her knife through his crotch, eliciting another scream before slitting his jugular with a ninja star, the blood splattering onto her face. She cut Derpys ropes free and said "Come on!" racing out of the building. The two finally got out and Derpy turned to Bloodmane.
"Thank you" Derpy said, her voice filled with joy
"Its my duty, now stop delivering drugs for the mob and get a better job" Bloodmane said authoritatively
"I know its just, I moved here with no money it seeded like the only way. But after this im going on the straight and narrow, im going to apply for a job in the Manehattan Postal Service. I did a great job back in Ponyville!"
Bloodmane hugged Derpy and said "Now let me take you home."
The two ponies walked together in silence, both stunned by the surreal night and wanting little more that to be at home in their safe beds, away from the scum of Manehattan. Yes Manehattan was a nasty, gritty, Dirty city but that night it was a little safer and a little cleaner.

Comments

[Neon Czolgosz]

This looks like a Rob Liefeld story...

[Thunder Chaser]

Thanks, I think...