Locked and Unlocked

by Pony Professor

Twilight Sparkle

Twilight Sparkle breathed a heavy sigh. She and her friend Pinkie Pie had been locked in the Royal Canterlot Bank’s safety-deposit box vault for a good seven hours now. They had talked a lot, slept a little, and exhausted just about every board game in Pinkie’s safety-deposit box, of which there were a dozen or so. This morning, Twilight would have not questioned why Pinkie would place such seemingly insignificant objects in the most secure location in Equestria, but now that Pinkie had been unlocked, she knew all she had to do was ask to get an answer:

“If one day all the games in the world disappeared or got destroyed somehow, it’d be up to me to re-introduce them to all of ponykind!” Pinkie was a pony that planned ahead.

With little else to occupy them, Twilight decided she should try to figure a way out of the vault. Safe cracking was not her forte, much less cracking one from the inside, but she figured anything they could attempt was worth a shot. She took another deep breath and stood up, pointing her horn at the day gate.

“Stand back, Pinkie. I’m going to try to get us out of here,” Twilight said, scuffing her hoof against the ground.

“What are you going to do?” Pinkie asked.

“Something stupid, most likely.” That was enough information to make Pinkie duck under the table just as Twilight fired a magic blast at the day gate in an attempt to bypass the thaumaturgium and hit the magic-conductive locking mechanism.

It failed.

Twilight found herself scrambling to join her friend under the table as her own spell ricocheted wildly off the walls, ceiling, and floor. It caused books, scrolls, games and the other things to go flying around the room.

“Why would you try that!?” Pinkie yelled.

“I thought it might work!” Twilight panicked, covering her head with her hooves.

“You had me read an entire paragraph to you on exactly why it wouldn’t work!” The blast finally dissipated and the two ponies cautiously re-emerged from under the table.

“Remind me to never do that again,” Twilight sighed. Pinkie took Twilight’s face in her hooves,

“Never do that again.”

“Not now,” Twilight pushed Pinkie’s hooves away, “At least nothing we took out got damaged.” Twilight began organizing her various belongings. Pinkie, wanting to help out, started to pick up some of the books. She came across the fourth of Starswirl’s Eight Lost Tomes.

“Hey, Twilight,” she called, “What’s with these tomes, anyway? Why do you need them?”

“Oh, don’t worry about those. I’m just studying them for a… personal project.”

“Uh-oh.” Pinkie said.

“What’s ‘uh-oh’?” Twilight asked, suddenly worried.

“You’re uh-oh,” Pinkie pointed with her hoof, “You never hesitate to tell us what you’re studying something for, so those three seconds of silence are a big ol’ red flag.” Pinkie dove into her pile of stuff and returned a second later with a chaise lounge… somehow. She patted it and motioned for Twilight to sit down,

“Come on, Twi-twi. Tell your auntie Pinkie what’s really going on.” Twilight grimaced at what she was about to say, but knew that she had to say it, at least for Pinkie’s sake.

Twilight mumbled.

“Sorry? I didn’t quite hear that.” Pinkie flicked her ears.

More mumbling, only slightly more articulate this time.

“One more time, Twilight. I think Auntie Pinkie might be getting old,” she put a funnel to her ear.

“I can’t read them,” Twilight said, still barely audible.

“Like they’re in a secret code or something? Do you need a spell to unlock them?”

“No, Pinkie, I literally can’t read them. Like a foal that still has to learn. I know at least some of every language known to Equestrians, and I can’t read these books. I knew Starswirl the Bearded was brilliant, but this is just impossible. I wanted to take them out to see if I could finally crack some of his crazy writing, but I just can’t.”

“So? Lots of ponies can’t read stuff.”

“But I’m not ‘lots of ponies,’ Pinkie!” Twilight snapped, “I’m Twilight Sparkle: Princess of Friendship, Celestia’s star pupil, bookhorse and librarian extraordinaire!”

“That last part sounds made up—”

“There shouldn’t be anything I don’t know or at least can’t learn! Who am I if I’m not the smartest, huh? Who am I if nopony can rely on me for answers? Who am I supposed to be if I don’t even want to be a Princess!?” There was only a moment of silence.

“Well you’re Twilight Sparkle, silly!” Pinkie smiled warmly.

“What?” Twilight breathed, “Pinkie, I’m being serious!”

“So am I! No matter who you are or were or want to be, you’re still you!” Pinkie booped Twilight on the nose. “I may have needed help for someone else to see the real me, but it looks like you need help to see the real you.”

“I… that’s…” Twilight began,

“Was the rest of that sentence, ‘very insightful, Pinkie’? Because I know. Come on, Twilight, keep up! We just went through an entire chapter about me and knowing things!” Twilight sighed the ever so familiar you’re-not-making-any-sense-but-I’ll-dismiss-it sigh. Twilight continued,

“It’s just… so much of my life has been planned and organized. Becoming a Princess was a huge wrench in those plans that I just wasn’t ready for. Now that I’ve got to be one, I don’t know if I’m up to the task.”

“What did you want to be before?” Pinkie asked.

“Now that you ask that, I’m not really sure,” Twilight responded, her eyes to one corner in thought, “I guess I sort of thought that I’d be studying magic and academics my entire life. I’ve imagined just kicking the bucket in the middle of a book—and that was all right with me.” Twilight fluffed her wings.

“Ever since I got these, though, I don’t know if I’ll ever kick the bucket. Not even Celestia and Luna know if immortality comes with alicorn territory. What if I decide not to rule anything? What will I do with thousands of years of life?” During Twilight’s existential questions, Pinkie had sidled herself up next to the alicorn on the chaise lounge, startling her a little bit.

“Wow, all that and you can’t read these books,” Pinkie said, holding Starswirl’s Second Lost Tome above her.

“Yeah, there’s a lot going on,” Twilight nodded. There was another moment of silence.

“Hey! Are you reading that?” Twilight gasped.

“Yup!” Pinkie chirped.

“And you were reading it earlier, too!”

“Uh-huh!”

“But how?”

“Believe it or not, it looks like me and ol’ Swirlybeard—”

“Starswirl the Bearded.”

“Whatever. Anywho, it looks like we think in a pretty similar fashion. Remember those recipe scrolls? Take a look at one of them.” Twilight followed Pinkie’s instructions and levitated a scroll marked with Pinkie’s Cutie mark over. She unfurled it and was amazed to find that, just like Starswirl’s Lost Tomes, the recipes were in a startlingly similar near-indecipherable language.

“Incredible!” Twilight exclaimed, “But why would you—either of you—write like this? Don’t you want anypony else to use this information?”

“Well, sure, but if Beardystar—”

“Starswirl.”

“Starbeard is anything like me, only the ponies dedicated enough to figure it out deserve to know it,” Pinkie explained. Twilight frowned,

“Am I not dedicated enough?” Pinkie shook her head,

“I think you’re plenty dedicated. Starswirl’s just a jerk. Take a close look at this tome again.” Pinkie shoved the book in Twilight’s face. She squinted, then widened her eyes,

“Oh my gosh, it’s different than before! That’s why I could never get anywhere!” Twilight said.

“Yep! Looks like that old unicorn put a spell on them to change the arrangement of the words every time someone opened the book on top of using our weirdly cryptic language,” Pinkie explained.

“That’s why the tomes are called ‘Lost’! Not because they had been physically missing, but because anypony reading them would get ‘lost’ every time they decided to take a break!” Incidentally, such a spell was something Twilight was familiar with, having used it to keep Shining Armor out of her diary when she was younger. She adjusted it for the magic algorithms more common for Starswirl’s time, pointed her horn at the book, and fired a counter-spell. Pinkie picked the book up and looked through a few pages,

“All in order! It’s not changing anymore!”

“Great! Now let’s get the other ones!” Twilight ordered. One by one, Pinkie tossed the Lost Tomes in the air for Twilight to shoot with the scrambling counter-spell.

“Nice shooting, Twi!” Pinkie cheered. Twilight blew the magic smoke off her horn and smirked.

“Now, if you don’t mind, Pinkie, could you tell me a little about what these books are even about?” Twilight asked.

“Can do!” Pinkie saluted, then buzzed through each of the books in record time, giggling occasionally.

“What’s so funny?” Twilight tilted her head.

“Haha! Seven of these books are just journals! This guy had a lot of marefriends!” Pinkie laughed.

“What about the eighth one?”

“You’re not gonna believe this: It’s all about the properties of thaumaturgium!”

Author's Note:

Quality may suffer, but I'm gonna bring this one to a quick close. Next time, Twilight and Pinkie finally escape!

Comments

[TheManFromMars]

Holy shit, not a SINGLE dislike in a matter of 12 weeks! Good job m8!

EDIT: why do i say things

[PonyDragon]

: “Uh-oh.”

: “What’s ‘uh-oh’?”

: “You’re uh-oh,”

Okay...

“I’m Twilight Sparkle: Princess of Friendship, Celestia’s star pupil, bookhorse and librarian extraordinaire!”

: "Don't forget "Egghead!"

Incidentally, such a spell was something Twilight was familiar with, having used it to keep Shining Armor out of her diary when she was younger.

Did it work?

---

Nice chapter!

But it's good Twilight became a princess: If she breaks (=destroys) the vault door, the bank would likely want a refund. (And a completely new one, since this door isn't unbreakable anymore)

Edit: It's in the feature-box.

[reader238]

Wait until the story is finished to invite trolls to the party

[Scorch215]

Finnaly an update! I've been waiting for this to update for some.time.and I am.not disappointed. Looking forward to the next chapter god sir

[Eclipse_filer]

Wow, so they had every thing they needed to leave.

[RoyalBardofCanterlot]

Quite amusing and insighful.