Body Armor and Black Suburbans

by totallynotabrony

Chapter 1

It was game night. The girls had gathered at Twilight’s place, all of them looking forward to the evening ahead. There were snacks on the table, but more important was the game itself.

“What is it tonight?” Pinkie asked, actually ignoring the cupcakes to take a closer look at the box that contained the game paraphernalia.

“Sunset Shimmer’s visiting,” Spike replied. “She brought this game over. I hear she’s doing really well making games based on ideas from the other world.”

“Didn’t you used to get games from that store in Canterlot?” Applejack asked.

Spike shook his head. “After that magic comic book, I decided I should go somewhere else to get stuff like this. I’m all for tabletop role playing games, but we go on enough quests for real.”

“What is this?” Rarity asked, as Pinkie removed her eyeballs from a close examination of the box.

“It’s called Body Armor and Black Suburbans,” said Sunset, coming in from the other room. “It’s an action game set in what you might consider a dystopian alien world. Spike wanted something sci-fi with lots of action.”

“Well, you can hardly blame me. Fluttershy was game master last time,” said Spike. “Besides, it’s not really dystopia, just a grittier version of the world on the other side of the mirror.”

“I suppose we’ll see,” said Twilight, who had entered with Sunset, bringing more snacks from the kitchen.

“I’ve given Spike a rundown on the mechanics,” said Sunset. “It’s based around a twenty-sided die. The rules are pretty simple. I’m afraid I can’t stay very long tonight, but Spike should be able to run things.”

“An action game sounds like my kind of night,” said Rainbow Dash, plopping down at the table and opening the box.

Applejack took a look at the rulebook, which was labeled American Action edition. “I’m not sure about this sci-fi, though.”

“It’ll be a challenge,” said Sunset. “There’s no magic. Easier rules to remember.”

The others sat down around the table and Spike passed out the character sheets. Applejack glanced at the rulebook and decided, “I suppose I’ll make my character a member of the Delta Force class. Good enough as any, I suppose.”

“I’m totally going for Air Force STS,” said Rainbow. “I’ll take the Rescue perk.” She passed the rulebook on.

“Why do they call it an Air Force?” Pinkie asked, looking at the rulebook. “The description doesn’t say anything about flying.”

“I guess the human characters themselves are a little boring,” said Spike. “It’s the stuff you can do with them that’s the cool part.”

“Like perks?” Applejack asked.

“Right, extra skills,” confirmed Spike.

Applejack smirked at Rainbow and said, “In that case, my perk is Airborne.”

“I like the idea of Marine Corps,” Pinkie decided. Her lips popped on the P sound. “The Heavy Weapons perk sounds good!”

“I don’t think ‘Corps’ is pronounced that way,” said Twilight as Pinkie passed her the rulebook. She read a few of the descriptions. “Oh, Intelligence! I think this CIA character is right for me. I’ll take the Sneaky Spook perk.”

Rarity took a long time with the rulebook. “I just don’t think any of these really feel right. Do you have anything else, Spike?”

“Well, I don’t know if you’re really supposed to use parts from other editions, but maybe I could make an exception, Rarity. I picked up this British Forces expansion.” Spike showed her another rulebook.

Rarity quickly focused on a character. “SAS sounds lovely. Oh, and it comes with a Teatime perk.”

“How do we explain a character from a different nationality being on our team?” Twilight asked.

“What does it matter?” asked Rainbow.

“You can’t just have a role playing game and not play your role,” Twilight admonished. “Twilight Sparkle, CIA, would never let tiny details slip past.”

“Oh! I would-er, I mean, Pinkie Pie, USMC, would.” Pinkie’s statement didn’t really surprise anyone.

“Perhaps the two governments are on good terms and my character came as part of an exchange program,” offered Rarity. She passed the rulebook to Fluttershy.

“Oh, this looks good,” said Fluttershy. “A Navy SEAL. Oh, wait...”

“What’s wrong?” asked Spike as her face fell.

“It’s not an actual seal.”

“You can have a nice Corpsman perk and be the team healer,” offered Spike.

“That sounds nice,” Fluttershy agreed. She turned to Sunset. “Are you creating a character?”

“Not this time. Like I said, I can’t stay for the whole game,” Sunset reminded. “Since Spike’s also game master, his character will be taking a more reserved role. The two of us put together a pretty good scenario for this game.”

“Is everypony ready?” asked Spike. “All right. We’ll get to character descriptions as we go. Let’s get started.

“You find yourselves in the basement of an anonymous building in a bureaucratic mire known as Washington, D.C…”

---

The six women had introduced themselves, but otherwise had kept conversation to a minimum. They all knew how these things went, and knew to keep their mouths shut.

The room was small, containing only a circular table and chairs. None of them had sat with their backs to the door, though the one named Pinkie Pie was closest. She seemed at ease, her constant fidgeting more a part of her personality than any signs of nervousness. Applejack, the tall blonde, sat relaxed but not limp. Beside her, the lithe Rainbow Dash was another notch up on the readiness scale. Fluttershy’s build was hard to determine beneath her clothes. She clutched her bag close and alternated between looking at the others and looking at the door. Rarity’s clothes were at the opposite end of the spectrum: stylish, fitting, and sophisticated. Of them all, Twilight Sparkle looked the most at home in the tiny room, but also the most interested in their purpose.

The door opened and a young man with a folder in his hand entered. “Good morning, my name is Spike. I’m an organizer with the CIA.” He gestured to Twilight. “You too, huh? I knew I’d seen you somewhere before.”

Spike shuffled some paperwork and veered back to topic. “I need to get some personal information from you all before we begin.”

“We gave you all of that already,” Applejack said.

“It could have changed,” put in Pinkie. “Maybe a spooky spook like Twilight scared some of it out of the files.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s just a nickname for the CIA,” said Twilight.

Spike opened the folder and reviewed some basic identifying information, mostly regarding appearance. The more personal topics the questions touched on regarded tattoos.

“I’ve got my Airborne wings tattooed on my chest,” Applejack contributed.

Rainbow snickered. “Really?”

“I consider it an important step on the way to Delta,” Applejack replied.

“As STS, I’ve got way more time airborne than you,” Rainbow replied.

Applejack shrugged. “Air Force? Why would I want my head in the clouds?”

“Well, at least I got my wings tattooed on my-” Rainbow abruptly stopped speaking.

“I bet I know where,” giggled Pinkie. “I’ve got my MARSOC tattoos. EGA’s for days. Scars, too. I really should get my money back from that discount place.”

“You shouldn’t pick at them when they’re healing,” Fluttershy said.

“Anything else?” Spike asked. “Rarity?”

She smiled. “No tattoos. Just a very...particular birthmark.”

Spike blushed. “With preliminaries out of the way, let’s get down to business. When picking members for a secret mission, it’s customary to give one last chance to back out before revealing the terms of the mission. If anyone wants to leave now, you can.”

No one did. Fluttershy may have been about to say something when Pinkie interupted with, “We’re ready for anything!”

“Very well,” said Spike. “The leader of the CIA, Director Celes-uh, Celeste has called you all here to undertake an important task. I’m glad you’re enthusiastic, because this will not be a standard mission.”

“So are we going to do what the CIA does best: infiltrate some third world place and topple their regime?” asked Pinkie.

“Not exactly,” said Spike. “I’ve got the intel right here. There’s this bad guy who’s been trying to incite government overthrow.”

“Ooh, that sounds like just the job for us,” said Twilight.

“Yeah, we’ll protect America!” contributed Applejack.

“Well, that’s the thing,” said Spike as he read from the folder. “The American political system is too complicated for your average miscreant to penetrate. For that, you need a politician. This bad guy is working in another region of the world and we have to go stop him. It’s a place called the Middle East.”

“So why do we care about some other place?” asked Rainbow.

“Well, no government means no stability and that happening on the other side of the world could lead to a domino effect that-” Spike frowned “-the page is smudged. Something, something, freedom.”

“Sounds good to me!” cheered Pinkie.

“What was this bad guy’s name again?” Rarity asked.

Spike fumbled for a moment. “How about...Sombr-uh, Sombrero. Yeah, Sombrero the evil bad guy attacking the Middle East. Our mission is to track him down.”

“A worthy quest,” said Twilight. “Alright, girls, let’s do this!”

---

“We’ll need to travel to the quest location and set up the starting conditions,” said Spike. He pulled out a twenty-sided die and gave it a roll. “Twelve. Okay, we...get coach tickets on an airplane. We arrive within one day, but are jet lagged and cranky. That means we can go straight into the quest, but we’ll all have to start with a fatigue penalty.”

“Where are we, exactly?” asked Rarity.

Spike raised his claws, gesturing for effect. “Welcome to the glittering city of Dubai. As the airplane lands, you can see the tall towers in the distance. It’s a desert oasis bordering the sea, a city created from sand and powered by money.”

“It sounds big. What should we do first?” wondered Fluttershy.

“I think we should find a hotel and get rid of our fatigue,” suggested Twilight.

“No way!” said Rainbow. “We’ve got to hit the town. There’s got to be some seedy bar where we can learn about Sombrero. Everypony knows you always go to the tavern for information.”

“You think so small,” commented Rarity. “Surely there’s a casino in a place like this?”

“We can solve this with a roll of the dice.” Spike picked up the d20. “Does anypony else have an idea before I roll?”

Comments

[Randomizer77]

Hmm... I think they should start at a casino, like Rarity suggested. I think it's a good place to start attempting to find intel on a seedy politician.

[Ultimate Bromaeda]

A good place to go would be the slums, If sombrero is trying to overthrow the place, He probably has the support of the common folk.
Or shoot everybody until you hit the right guy, Valiant may be dead, but he lives on in or homicidal actions.

[buckweiser]

>rolls a 1
>Taxi driver attempts to extort them. Hillarity ensues.

[Jlargent]

Okay this reminds me of the Knights of the Dinner Table comics.

[Lithl]

"Freedom fighters" bomb the airport before the group has a chance to get to whatever they were planning. They attempt to take hostages, but the attackers didn't realize they were dealing with PCs!

[General Grant]

“So are we going to do what the CIA does best: infiltrate some third world place and topple their regime?” asked Pinkie.

Well, I forgot completely who's writing this.
Find a newspaper or TV broadcast and get the lay of the land, and since this is Dubai, make a list of local oil sheiks, financing revolution isn't easy

[D48]

Identifying and learning about the likely backers is the first step with the port being the best option for gathering information. The crews and especially the captains will know what is moving where and who is financing it to help figure out who is funding Sombrero and possibly more about his goals and methods.