The Escapades of Lord Corn Wall

by Megatron

The Drill

Autumn had come to Equestria and with it, the working spirit of its denizens. Summer was over and the monsoon had gone with it leaving only the occasional shower in its wake. The young returned to their studies as farmers prepared for harvest, everypony was gearing up for Noble houses to the end of the monsoon season. The end of the rain meant that the unofficial armistice between the nobles was ended and that all the plots and schemes created during the long wait would be unleashed in a violent wave of rivalry and desperate ruthlessness. Whoever was beaten here would be at an advantage until the next monsoon season came and that was seen as the most important thing in the long run. This meant that there were only two strategies, aim for a rival and hope to cripple them or wait for somepony else to come for you so that you may foil their plot and counter attack. Corn Wall preferred the latter while his mortal nemesis Steel Heart preferred the former.

Celestia knew that this opening week of hostilities between the nobles would be the most brutal and thus, the most entertaining. Above all others though, it would be amazing to watch Steel Heart attempt to cripple Corn Wall due to the fact that it was like the meeting of an unstoppable force and an immovable object, Neither one would give up until the other lie utterly ruined. That would never happen due to the cruelly keen instinct that one develops by being one of the top nobles. Regardless, the two continued to develop more and more elaborate plans with the goal of total victory and both became better at countering as well. Steel Heart’s plan was simplistic yet epic in scale and amazing in practice. She had spent her time after the failed rebellion wisely and had her engineers develop one of the most horrific tools of industry ever seen. It was a terrifying bore device with many blades and drills created simply to go through the abandoned mines beneath Corn Wall’s manor and weaken the foundations so that the whole structure to collapse, meaning that one way or another Corn Wall would be removed from the great contest this year. This plan was doomed from the start.

Corn Wall had changed the competition forever by finally introducing a new factor, the air. Camera technology had improved greatly and it was the scion of the great Corn Lord who first saw that quick photography combined with a Pegasus’ ability to fly meant that nowhere was safe from his prying eyes and anything could be seen. This would eventually be countered but for now Corn Wall had a massive advantage. One of these flights provided pictures of the drill as it was being moved to the caves and let Corn Wall know what he was dealing with. His course of action was clear, destroy the drill at any cost.

“What’s the plan my lord?” said a very eager Fire Star.
“Simple we go through the mine and place this electro disrupter that Zap Watt made on the drill!” Lord Corn Wall responded, placing a pack on his back.
The bodyguard smiled at the simplicity of the plan and acknowledged, “Yes my lord.”

The way to the mines was rough and difficult, requiring one to pass through large numbers of rocks and steep hills to reach the old entrance. The two nearly slipped several times and were both relieved when they found the cobwebbed gates of the cave sprawled out before them. The evidence was clear that some one had been there ahead of them and couldn’t be more than an hour ahead. The chase had begun and the balance of power stood in the balance. Whoever one this would be at an incredible advantage.

The caves were huge and beautiful, filled with amazing gem stones but ruled by an empire of ambient noise. It quickly became clear that finding the drill through sound was pointless and that sight was the only resource that could be relied upon. All was calm until the party had lost the tracks of the device and paused, to ponder their next move. All seemed lost until a ragged looking mare that had apparently come in between either group approached them.

The stranger approached with a slight grin asking, “who are you?”
“I am Lord Corn Wall, noble of Canterlot, seeking a great drill that would have been brought here by outsiders nearly an hour ago, have you seen it?” responded the noble.
“I have seen this device and I will be more than happy to bring you to it!” the stranger chimed.
“Then let’s go!” And with those words the two followed the cave dweller down an alien labyrinth.
“Don’t you think this may be some sort of trap set up by Steel Heart my lord?” Fire Star asked nervously.
“No” replied Corn Wall “Why would she waste the resources on that?”
Fire Star starred blankly at the noble before responding, “Because it would work.”
“How do you know that?”
“Because we’re following a stranger right now aren’t we?”
“Yeah, but this stranger must just live here.”
“She lives in an abandoned mine?”
“Lots of people live in a mine!”

Suddenly the guide stopped and turned to the pair with an unnervingly large smile.
“Here’s your stop,” She said.
“What are you talking about, I don’t see a drill!” Barked Corn Wall.
“I never saw a drill.”
“But you said that you did!”
“I lied.” With that word the Pony reveled it’d true form, as a changeling. This changeling was cutoff from the swarm after the royal wedding and fled into the mines to lick it’s wounds and wait for more ponies to take advantage of. The changeling leapt at the noble, seeking to drain him off his positive feelings only to be knocked back in an instant, for nobles have no love or compassion, simply hate and contempt. This pure cocktail of negativity would leave the changeling in a comatose state for weeks, before it found the strength to get up and leave the mines.

The changeling did do one thing however, set the pair on the right path again. When they looked down they saw the tracks of the drill and quickly pursued to the source. Unfortunately Steel Heart did remember to bring henchmen with her and the moment the two were near the drill, they were captured by burly stallions who brought them before Steel Heart.

“I was wondering when you’d show up.” Steel Heart deadpanned.
“You’ll never get away with this you fiend!” Shouted Corn Wall
“I already have!” Steel Heart screamed while pressing a button connected to the drill.

When the drill began boring into the earth, everypony in Canterlot could hear its effects. The device emitted a loud metallic grind that seemed as if it came not from the ground but from the sky. This phenomenon was documented and to this day, the vast population has been unable to determine it’s true cause. Corn Wall could feel his life’s work being ruined and knew there was only one chance to prevail. He would drop the electro disrupter on the ground and kick it with one of his free legs. If this device worked like everything else Zap Watt built he would only need to get it near the drill for it to start sending electric bolts flying in all directions and crush the great machine. He did exactly that but found that instead of simply shutting down the drill the disrupter did something else entirely, cause the drill to explode.

What followed next was pure chaos as everypony ran for the exit to avoid falling boulders. Enemy helped enemy as all simply wanted out of the cave, seeing it as a place of death. In reality only a few good sized rocks and Gems had fallen from the ceiling but the loud noise combined with the lack of knowledge on what a cave in actually looked like fooled the lot of them into running home as quickly as possible. Regardless the day was over and Corn Wall was still standing.

Both nobles rested, preparing for the inevitable counter attack that was soon to follow. Celestia retired to her chambers and reviewed all that had passed. This new season had begun magnificently with a number of exploits headed by the explosion in the mines; all of these brought her great joy. What had taken place must be remembered for not only would it lead to the next set of counter schemes but it was all in all, a great day. And it was days like this that made all the boredom of royal life more than worth it.

Author's Note:

The inspiration for the story was simple, I was starting my Junior Year of high school. Early on, I was considering only doing this story for that one summer when I started writing it, but obviously, plans change. I did mainly stick to writing whenever I had a break, but sometimes (like with this story) I wrote away from holidays. Honestly, that Semester was the only fun one that I've ever had at school (especially considering my miserable time in College), so writing something that fit in with it is actually pretty fitting in retrospect.

I was also inspired by the reports of strange sounds coming from the ground at the time and, as an avid fan of the supernatural at the time, I couldn't resist. There were also bits of inspiration from the Lego themes Rock Raiders and Power Miners both of which I still adore to this day.

In the story, I also wanted to hint that something big was approaching (which would act as the end of the story), but I also wanted it to seem not too out of the ordinary, so that the characters would be caught off guard when things started getting intense later.

-Lost_One, 8/7/19