Requests

by CoastBrumby

News

Princess Twilight Sparkle sat by a window in a cosy sitting room in her Palace of Friendship. Her horn glowed as she used her magic to levitate a cup of tea to her mouth. She took a sip. “Spike! This is incredible. This is the best tea I have ever drank.” Twilight said.

“Really? You mean it?” Spike, Twilight’s baby dragon assistant, asked.

“Yes, if you keep making tea like this, my ten AM break will become my favourite part of the day. However, my decision stands. I’m hiring on more staff.” Twilight said.

“But Twilight, I can work harder.” Spike whined.

“I know you can, but I don’t want you to work harder. I want you to enjoy your life. You’re still a child. You need time to play. This isn’t a reflection on your skill at all. It’s just now that I have this castle there is so much more to clean, and being the Princess of Friendship has resulted in so much more mail to be sorted and answered. We can’t keep asking our friends for help. Sure this castle is partially theirs, but they are busy with their own lives. Plus, if they don’t have to clean the castle, I won’t feel so bad about the paltry wage supplement they receive for going on missions.” Twilight said.

A perky voice spoke behind Twilight. “Oh, don’t feel bad. We know the government gave you only half the budget you requested. But politics bore me. Have a hot cross bun.”

Twilight Sparkle spat the tea out of her mouth. “Pinkie Pie, do not sneak up on me like that. Not everypony has your ESP.” Twilight said.

“You said I could come and go from the castle as I pleased as I have a throne.” Pinkie Pie said.

“Yes, I said that, but I didn’t say you could scare me to death.” Twilight said. She levitated a bun out a box Pinkie was holding. She took a bight. “This is good. Did you come just to bring me some buns and join me for tea?” Twilight asked.

Pinkie sat down. Spike poured her a glass of tea. Pinkie took sip. “Wow! Spike, this is the most spectacularist tea I have ever slurped. What’s your secret?” Pinkie said.

“My secret is I spent years perfecting the perfect blend of leaves and brewing techniques. Why? You may ask. I did it for Twilight. You see Princess Celestia loves tea, and Twilight used to love having tea with her mentor when she was a filly, so I kept making the tea better and better, so the princess would come by more often.” Spike said.

“Oh Spike, sometimes I wonder what I did to deserve such a devoted assistant and friend.” Twilight said.

Spike shrugged. “I dunno. Got lucky I guess.” He turned to Pinkie Pie. “Yes, I am going to eat that bun. I saw you eyeing it.” Spike shot his tongue out. It wrapped around the bun and spike pulled it into his mouth.

“Oooo. That’s impressive.” Pinkie Pie said.

“That’s nothing. You should see him catch flies.” Twilight said.

“Twilight. You said you wouldn’t reveal my secret.” Spike said.

“You can lose a friend forever like that. Secrets must be kept.” Pinkie Pie said.

“It’s no secret Spike catches flies. Plenty of ponies have seen him, and it is nothing to be ashamed of. Flies are an ordinary part of a baby dragon’s diet.” Twilight said.

“Do you eat other insects?” Pinkie Pie asked.

“Yes.” Spike replied.

“Remember the Breezies? They had insectile wings. Did you want to gobble them up?” Pinkie asked.

“I’m a dragon. We’re an apex predator. Sometimes I feel like chowing down on all my pony friends.” Spike said.

Pinkie gasped, but she quickly recovered. “So, if you were to eat your friends, who would you start with, and who would you eat last? How would we be prepared? Would you use your fire breath to bake us to a crisp, or just to warm us up a bit? The mind boggles.” Pinkie Pie said.

Spike stepped back. “You know, Pinkie. I was joking. The Breezies did not look appetising, and the thought of eating a pony makes me ill.” He said.

“This topic has become very disturbing.” Twilight said. “Why did you visit today, Pinkie?” Twilight said.

“I think this topic is fun, and I think I should be saved for last as I am unquestionably the sweetest, and I would make an excellent dessert.” Pinkie said.

“You make a point.” Spike said. He stared at Pinkie and licked his lips.

“Pinkie, stop corrupting him. You came here for a reason, remember.” Twilight said.

“Oh, alright. I am here because I just received a letter from my, big sister, Maud. She tells me she will be in Ponyville in one week’s time, and she will be staying for a few days. Maud wanted me to ask you if you would have any time in your schedule to talk to her about something very important. She has a request to make of you?” Pinkie said.

“I think I can pencil in some time next week. What’s her request?” Twilight asked.

“She didn’t say in the letter. All she said was it was a personal request.” Pinkie replied.

“Can you give us a hint?” Spike asked.

“Nope. All I can say is that she wrote she had big news to tell me when she arrives. Oh, I am so excited. I’m hoping she’s discovered a super rock that can be used to make super rock candy.” Pinkie said.

“I think tanzanite gives it the best zing.” Spike said.

“Not all of us can digest gems, Spike.” Twilight replied.

“I’ve tried. Comes out the other end just the same as it went in.” Pinkie stated.

“As a scientist, I’m fascinated, but as a mare, I am grossed out by the thought of it.” Twilight said.

“I took notes on my experiments. Would you like to read them?” Pinkie said.

Twilight paused for a moment before nodding. “Yes, I would enjoy that.” She said.

“You just said you would enjoy reading about Pinkie Pie’s Poo.” Spike said with a snicker.

“Science is not always pretty. I’m impressed. I didn’t realize you had such an analytical mind, Pinkie.” Twilight said.

“Baking is just another form of applied chemistry.” Pinkie put her hooves on her head and spread them out. “Keep your mind open, Princess.” She said.

“It’s funny. Princess Celestia says the same thing to me. I like to think I am a very free thinker. But my free time is at end. I have a very busy schedule today. It is always good to see you, my joyful friend. Tell Maud: I would be happy to make time for her when she arrives, and I will hear her personal request with an open mind.” Twilight said.

“Okie doki Loki. I need to go start getting ready for Maud’s arrival. I should write back to her first, so she knows I definitely want her to visit. No time to chat. Busy busy busy. See you, Twilight.” Pinkie said. She ran off in a blur.

“She’s always fun. Now, Spike, the tea break is over. What was next on the schedule?” Twilight asked.

“You were going to compose a letter to the Flim Flam Brothers on why you cannot endorse their new brand of Unicorn horn wax.” Spike said. He pulled out a quill.

“Of course.” Twilight said. She cleared her throat. “Dear Flim and Flam, Thank you for the sample you sent. I enjoyed subjecting it to rigorous analysis. First, I would like to say the word vile is a term I do not apply to gifts easily, but I would apply it to your so called wax a thousand times over before I ever applied a single milligram of it to my horn.”

Spike laughed.

Twilight dictated several more paragraphs, and implored the brothers to dispose of all their unprocessed congealed used lard without delay.

Spike wrote on. He doubted the Flim Flam Brothers would head Twilight Sparkle’s words. They were a pair of Unicorns who were a bit too open minded in Spike’s opinion.