Mystery Pony Theater 3000

by JusSonic

Chapter 4: Not the Final Sacrifice

Chapter 4: Not the Final Sacrifice

Unknown to the heroes, the villains are watching their progress. Dr. Erhardt said, "Well, gotta hand it to them, Clayton. They are determined."

"And stupid!" Pearl growls as she hit Bobo. "A statue?! Are you kidding me?!"

"Well, statues can move! Haven't you seen Night at the Museum?" Bobo ask the Lawgiver sheepishly.

"I don't watch movies unless it's using them to torture the group! Frank. What is the progress?"

"Well, they have to land right here." Frank explains as he summons a map, noting where the group will be landing. The sidekick points at the map as he explains, "Then, they have to go through this lake underwear to reach the other side of the mountain which cannot be passed by flying. Then, they have to go through the cave area..."

"Hmmm, I think it's time we give another distraction." Forrester said with an evil gleeful look.

Forrester snaps his fingers as some shark like figure appears in the water lake, giving an evil grin as he jumps into the water.

"Huh. I don't recognize that guy from any bad film that we send Joel, Mike and the robots." Frank said, blinking his eyes. This is a new one right here.

Forrester comment, "This may not be from any of the movies we've shown Joel, Mike and the Bots, but it IS a good diversion."

"Anyway, it happened in the previous area, why not here?" Dr. Erhardt ask with a smirk. "Oh, this is going to be fun!"

--------------

The group, as predicted, landed near a lake. Mitchell remarks, "We gotta go by foot. Those mountains can't be passed by flying."

"Equestria keeps changing every time!" Rainbow complains in frustration. "It's like we don't recognize it anymore."

"Oh dear. Are our memories of our world is changing?" Fluttershy ask in sadness. "Would we have to adapt to new memories?"

"Would Donald Trump be president?! Who knows or cares?!" Crow snaps at the ponies in annoyance. "We can stop either from happening!"

"We will have to swim." Twilight said, glancing at the lake nearby. "If we dive under the mountain area..."

"Wait, wait, wait; Swim in 'dat?" Applejack ask, giving a skeptic look at the water. "Won't we y'all drown?"

"I will just use the spell that I used to allow Hoofbeard to see his merpony love Jewel. We will do fine."

"Are we rust poof, Joel?" Gypsy ask her creator curiously, looking at the water as she ponders if she and the robots are rust proof or not.

"Yep. I thought of everything!" Joel explains proudly, making the robots glare at him. "Well, except making your arms work. What can I say? I didn't get much parts to work with!"

Twilight uses her spell to allow the ponies, robots and humans to swim underwater, then everyone jumps in. Everyone begins swimming in a big bubble as they move under the mountain area.

"Well, got to admit, haven't been this swimming in a long time." Mitchell said with a grunt.

"Not that we care, Mitchell, but...HOLY CRAP, WHAT'S THAT?!" Crow screams like a girl as something swim by fast.

"Looks like a big shark!" Applejack exclaims in surprise.

"But what kind of shark is in this lake?" Twilight ask in shock and confusion. "There are only sharks in oceans, not lakes!"

A huge shark appears near the gang, giving an evil grin as he reveals to have arms. The humans, robots and ponies, gasps and screams in terror.

"AHHHHH! IT'S FANG!!!!" Pinkie screams in terror, recognizing the shark mutant from "Total Drama: Revenge of the Island".

"Who?" The humans and robots ask confused.

"He appeared in JusSonic and Orange Ratchet's big hit "Total Drama Equestria". But this is an AU fic! It has nothing to do Total Drama!"

"Try telling him that!" Spike yelps in alarm.

Fang roars madly as he swims right at the group. Looks like dinner is being served!

---------------------------------------------

FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER...

The others were busy swimming as Pinkie was humming, carrying a huge can of Mutant Shark Repellent as Twilight sighed, "Holy Crazy Prepared, Pinkie Pie."

"Man, if the author hadn't got himself distracted with writing his other story on fanfiction dot net, we would have seen an epic battle between us and a mutant shark." Mike said.

"It was a really great battle..." Crow smiled. "Anyway, what exactly do you mean that this is an 'AU Fic'?"

"I don't think we're supposed to figure that out yet until later..." Tom said. "MUCH later! How much farther?"

"Not too far..." Joel said as they looked up. "In fact, I think we just found some people near the lake!"

"Wait..." Gypsy paused as she looked around. "I think we're missing somebody! Where's Mitchell?"

Crow blinked. "Oh yeah! He died!"

Twilight gasped. "Oh right! He charged right through the shark and then got eaten!"

"Oh well..." Rainbow sighed. "He's helped us as far as we can get. We may as well get new help while we are here."

"Agreed!" Applejack sighed as they continued to swim up. "Come on..."

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Meanwhile, back at Castle Canterlot, Celestia sighed as she put the Element of Loyalty next to the Element of Magic, "I think they should be safe here for now..."

Little did Celestia know was that as soon as she turned her back, another portal opened up as a human hand GRABBED the Element of Loyalty and replaced it with a similar look alike. An unusual evil little kid female like chuckle was heard as the portal closed up.

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Up on the water's surface, an old man with a big beard was drinking from a bottle of scotch as he looked up to the sky. "Well, kid, looks like we're lost again..."

"Hey, Zapp! What's that in the distance," A teenage kid said, pointing towards some mysterious figures rising up in the water...

The man, known as Zapp Rowsdower, squinted a bit as he said, "Seems to be a colorful cast of characters. Better get my gun, kid. This could be messy..."

-----------

"Ugh!" Crow groans as everyone got out of the water. "I felt like the Creature from the John Agar film!"

"Yuck!" Rarity remarks, spitting out some water. "I sure hope we don't do that again."

"Rainbow? Blow dry, now." Twilight orders.

"Roger, Egghead!" Rainbow exclaims, saluting her princess.

Rainbow shakes herself dry before flying upward. She zooms around quickly before blowing all the water right off the gang. As Rainbow finishes, she smirks and laughs. The humans and ponies' hair/manes are even funnier than when she did Twilight's the first time!

"Great, now I feel like singing something from the 70s." Joel said embarrassingly.

Rarity sighs as she got to work on fixing everyone's hair. Spike smiles as he comments, "As usual, Rarity, you're a dream."

"Thank you, Spike, darling." Rarity said as she finishes up on Applejack...who got a fancy perm, much to her annoyance. "You look amazing, Applejack."

"Don't yew think it," Applejack scowls as she fixes her own mane. "Frou-frou is yer department, not ours."

"Wait a minute." Pinkie said, frowning a bit. "Someone is watching us!"

Pinkie took out her Party Cannon and opens fire. A familiar man came out, yelping, "Hey, what the hell?!"

"Hey, we come in speech!" A familiar boy exclaims as he came out, waving his hands like an idiot (which he looks like).

"Oh, just a bearded guy and a kid." Pinkie said with a shrug, putting the cannon away.

"No, worst. It's Zapp Rowsdower and that kid whose name I don't know or care about." Crow sighs in annoyance.

"My name is Troy McGreggor." The boy said in concern.

"And we care why?"

"Great, we're on our way to the lost city and got blasted by some pink pony." Zapp said in irritation, getting the group's notice.

"Say, you're going to the lost city?" Mike ask the duo curiously. "What a coincidence. We are over there ourselves."

"Yeah, can you give us a ride?" Fluttershy ask Zapp with a hopeful smile. "Our last driver is...well..."

"He got eaten by a shark." Rainbow said with a shrug, getting to the point. "How about a ride, Mr. Zapp Blower?"

"Rowsdower, and I don't pick up hitchhikers!" Zapp snaps in irritation to the group.

"You pick me up." Troy points out to Zapp, reminding his friend as to how he's helping him out.

Most of the group looks a bit awkward before groaning, "Eeeeew."

"Not like that!"

"You mean "not like that, eh?" Mike jokes, getting a laugh from Crow.

"Come on, pleeeease." Fluttershy said, batting her eyelashes at Zapp, making him yelp. She is so cute...

"I...ugh...no...I..." Zapp said, groaning. He is trying to resist but the mare's cuteness is breaking down his defenses.

"Pleeeeeease?"

"Oooooh. Okay."

"Yeah, alright!" Most of the group cheers on with Fluttershy smiling in triumph.

"How did you do that?" Gypsy ask Fluttershy in amazement.

"Well, I am cute, it helps." Fluttershy said, giving out a happy squee.

"Thanks for giving them a ride, Zapp." Troy said to his friend who sighs as he prepares to head off to his truck.

"Mind you, we got little room in the truck, so the animals and the robots will have to sit in the back." Zapp said sternly to the new riders, then groans. "Damn it, I am getting soft..."

"Uh, he said "sit", right?" Spike ask the others in concern, hoping that the Dragon himself heard right.

-----------

"Glad you're helping us out, Rowsdower." Joel said as he and Mike sat in the backseat. "We appreciate all you're doing for us."

"Yeah, tell me: how long have you been truckin', Rowsdower?" Mike ask Zapp with a chuckle.

"Look, the sooner we get there, the sooner we don't heard that damn song!" Zapp groans as he is hearing the ponies singing from the back of the truck.

"One more time!" Gypsy calls out. Zapp groans as the ponies, Dragon and robots sang.

Group: Triple dent gum,
will make you smile.
Triple dent gum,
It lasts a while.
Triple dent gum,
will help you Mister,
to punch bad breath right in the kisser.
Triple Dent Gum!

-------------

"Hey, that is a great song." Frank said with a smile as he, Erhardt and Professor Bobo watches the show, then they begin to sing.

Trio: Triple dent gum
will make you smile.

"The only song we will be singing is your funeral march if you keep that up!" Pearl exclaims angrily at the trio, shutting them up.

"Anyway, Fang blows it big time. Time we go for the backup plan." Forrester said sternly. "Send in the big guy."

"No, not the big guy, not the big guy!" Professor Bobo cries, whimpering like a little child. "Just one question."

"Who is the big guy?" The head boys asks a bit irritated at the same time as Bobo.

"Well, lucky for us, before Brain Guy went on his little mission, he brought him into existence." Pearl remarks with a cruel laughter. "Oh yes, if Manos was bad enough, this one is worst."

-----------------

To Zapp's relief, the ones in the back finally got tired of the song and begins playing a game.

"So if you want any mares in the world, who would it be?" Tom Servo ask with a smile to Twilight.

Twilight blushes, insisting, "I'm straight. I don't need a mare."

"Come on! I've heard Congress is going to make gay marriage legal. At least give us info."

"Do it, do it, do it!" The robots, Pinkie and Rainbow exclaims anxiously.

"Well, okay...it's Celestia." Twilight said as she squees a bit.

The mares screeches in delight. Rarity remarks, "Oh, well, that's oblivious. The way you wanted to please her, you acted like a filly fooler."

"I do not!"

"Come on, sugah cube, admit it." Applejack said to Twilight, causing the mare to blush some more.

"Well, to be honest, uh..." Twilight said with a blushing look. Suddenly Pinkie's tail begins to twitch. "Uh oh, twitchy tail. That means..."

"MOVE THE TRUCK!" Pinkie screams out.

Zapp yelps as he swerves in time to dodge a falling boulder. The truck came to a stop as everyone got out, a bit shocked. That was a close one!

"What was that?!" Troy ask in shock.

"It's...the Rock." Mike said, speaking in a voice that Sean Connery can be proud of.

"I know that! Where did it come from?"

"Wow, no wonder you're annoying." Rainbow said to Troy dryly.

"Hey, I think I see someone on the cliff above us." Gypsy said as she looks upward.

The gang looks up to see a tough cave man like person growling at them.

"Eegah." Joel said, recognizing the cave man from another movie that the group had saw. Eegah roars as he grabs another boulder. "Look out!"

"He's a dumb looking cave man!" Zapp exclaims, rolling his eyes in annoyance. "What harm can he do?"

Zapp yelps as Eegah threw another rock down, forcing him to dodge in time. Looks like his question got answered the hard way!

All of a sudden, Eegah was shot down as he fell right off the platform.

Everyone else blinked as they looked at each other before blinking. Joel then said, "Uh... who did tha-"

"I did, you motherfuckers."

Everyone yelped... all but Mike, Joel and Twilight, who were just annoyed as Tricia Leonard came around.

"That's right! I'm back, and I'm sticking with my guns! You always leave me behind, but not this-" Tricia started.

"Okay, I'm sorry, can we please stop here,” Joel frowned.

"Huh?" Everyone blinked.

"Yeah, yeah, just... just stop, okay?" Joel sighed. "I want to clear the elephant in the room..."

Joel and Mike turned as Mike took a deep breath before saying, "First of all... Tricia... who the hell are you? What the hell happened?"

"What?" Tricia blinked. "What do you mean, what happened to what?"

"Your personality. What the hell happened to it?" Joel frowned.

"Yeah... back in the very first chapter of this story, the prologue I believe, you had this personality that went like 'Oh my Gosh, I can't believe you stole the ship, when he obviously didn't, and I went accusing people of it, also I'm smart and I'm a genki girl and I like robots, they're so cute!', and now you have this... 'God, you motherfuckers, you left me behind, I like shooting things!'-schtick." Mike frowned.

"I-is this a new schtick we're doing, because oh my God, this is getting ridiculous!" Twilight glared.

"What is ridiculous about shooting-" Tricia started.

"No, no, no, let me, Mike and Twilight talk..." Joel frowned. "Because we'll answer your question."

Twilight nodded as she took a deep breath. "...Yes, Tricia, we have left you behind on purpose. We are being written like awful dicks. We will not deny that. But we have a good reason for that. We don't like you. None of us do."

"Now, let me ask YOU a question, Tricia Leonard!" Mike glared. "Does us admitting we leave you behind on purpose REALLY surprise you? Do you even REACT to the things around you? The magic ponies, the robots... in fact, I don't think I've seen you react to ANYTHING except with anger since the first chapter! Your primary role as of late seems to boil down to random profanities and vowing revenge on us, like... 'Motherfuckers, you left me behind', 'Motherfuckers, I'm going to kill all of you for leaving me behind', 'Motherfuckers, I'm going to punch people in the face!'!"

"REALLY, TRICIA!" Joel yelled. "You're angry all the time for leaving you behind! Why? Why is that, Tricia? Me, Tom, Crow, Gypsy, Cambot, Mike, the Mane Six and Spike have established ourselves as important characters! The trailer seemed to play you up as an important character, yet so far, you have done nothing. NOTHING!"

"I-I don't know, I just thought we had a running gag-like thing going..." Tricia stuttered. "All of you enter a door and I get left behind..."

"And that is ALL you ever fucking do these days, isn't it?!" Twilight yelled. "And I'm sorry for breaking the fourth wall here, but I want to bring up a character in another universe! There was once a pony that was so threatening he would be willing to kill ANY human or anyone ASSOCIATED WITH HUMANS! Nobody liked him, not even Princess Celestia or Princess Luna! His name is Tuerto! He was threatening, he was a villain, he may have had one goal... but he had something going for him! He had a motivation! The people that read about him in 'Total Drama Equestria'? They would at least put a comment towards him near the end! And even JusSonic, who had NO FUCKING RIGHT TO FEEL BAD FOR HIM, felt bad for him anyway! JusSonic whined and complained, but it showed that Tuerto AT LEAST gained SOME emotion from somebody! You, Tricia? Who comments about you?"

"Nobody!" Joel frowned. "And you want to know why?"

"Because you are boring!" Mike glared. "Nobody loves you! This is why your little 'leave you behind' schtick is getting old!"

"This is why nobody likes you, Tricia!" Twilight yelled. "THIS is why they will never invest interest in you, like they invested interest in Tuerto!"

"GET A GODDAMN FUCKING PERSONALITY, FOR GOD'S SAKE,” Joel, Mike and Twilight yelled.

Tricia just stood there, staring blankly with wide eyes as the rest of the Mane Six, Spike, Zapp and Troy just stared in shock.

"Man..." Applejack blinked. "That was... pretty long..."

"Indeed..." Rainbow Dash said.

"Well... you got something to say?" Mike asked.

Tricia just stared blankly.

"...Hello?" Crow blinked as Joel, Mike and Twilight just looked at each other in concern.

"D-don't you have something to say in retaliation?" Tom Servo asked.

Tricia Leonard still stood there in shock.

"Tricia?" Fluttershy asked.

Tricia still stood there in shock.

"Come on, you have to talk about something!" Applejack begged.

"Yeah, like..." Rainbow turned and saw Brain Guy waving on the top of the temple, holding an Element. "Ha! How about Brain Guy on the top of the steps! He's holding an element, and he's planning a surprise attack if we go up? Huh?"

Everyone (but Tricia) looked up to see Brain Guy as Twilight smiled nervously. "Yeah! Just look at him. The minute we go up the stairs, he'll summon another one of their world's monsters from the films!"

"You got to comment on SOMETHING like that!" Rarity said.

Tricia Leonard just stood there, saying nothing.

"She's scaring me..." Spike said.

"Right... well..." Mike said. "We're just going to go up the stairs to talk with Brian Guy. We're just going to get the Element. You just... stand there."

Tricia Leonard was still standing in shock.

"Right..." Twilight nodded. "Zapp, Troy, you coming?"

The two nodded as the Mane Six, Spike, Mike, Joel and the bots, and Zapp and Troy started walking up the stairs... but not before Spike turned back to see Tricia, just standing in shock. Spike decided to just keep going as they continued up the steps.

1 HOUR LATER...

The group breathes in and out, getting tired as they reach the top of the stairs.

"Wow...stairs...and I thought...phew...." Tom Servo groans as he collapses.

"Everyone, okay?" Applejack ask the others, breathing in and out.

"Yeah..." Mike said, breathing in. "I guess we should've taken the elevator."

"THERE'S AN ELEVATOR?!" The ponies yells out in shock and alarm. They turn and there it is: an elevator which was nearby the whole time!

"Yeah, ironic, huh?"

"Good one, Mike!" Crow groans as most of the ponies collapse on the ground.

"Ugh, someone let me know when the bad guys come up." Zapp said, slapping his forehead. "I feel like hitting someone."

"You can hit Troy and see what happens." Tom Servo said with a smile, making Troy yelp a bit.

"Nah, I ain't that desperate."

"Does anyone feel bad about Tricia at this point?" Rainbow ask with a groan. "Because I kinda do...."

"Newsflash: she was turning into a pointless cameo which we started this." Joel said to Rainbow with a sigh. "Kinda like Tuerto whom..."

"Newsflash: Jus came to his senses." Pinkie interrupts Joel happily. "He hates his guts now."

"THANK GOD/CELESTIA!" Most of everyone exclaims, relieved that one of the authors of this fic came to his senses.

"Tuerto? Jus, what?" Troy ask a bit confused. "You ponies are weird."

"That's just us." Pinkie said to Troy happily.

"Ahem." Brain Guy said patiently as he stood nearby the Element of Generosity. "If you're done..."

"Oh yes." Twilight said clearing her throat. "Brain Guy! Hands over the element. We are willing to fight if you refuse!"

Some of the heroes who aren't exhausted or fallen prepared or try to fight anyway...then...nothing...happen?

"Uh, shouldn't a bad guy appear by Brain Guy by now?" Gypsy ask, blinking her only eye. "Hey, what gives Brain Guy?"

"I'm doing things differently! Each time you all confronted a bad guy of the day or something recently, the bad guy gets taken out way too easily." Brain Guy explains bored. "Like Fang, Eegah, Manos, need I go on?"

"So what are you going to do, Brain Guy?" Joel ask Brain Guy, being precautious.

"Simple! I issue you a challenge: beat it and you will be able to get the element. That way, we get something interesting."

"Okay, so what are you planning on doing?" Rarity ask anxiously yet in precaution.

"This." Brain Guy said with a devilish smirk as he uses his brain powers...to make a bomb with a sparkling fuse appear. "TRY TO GET RID OF THIS!"

"A BOMB!!!!!" Most of everyone screams in terror and horror.

"Well, obviously since we have been dealing with movie bombs lately." Mike remarks bitterly.

Twilight levitates as she fly off in hopes to get the bomb out of range. The mare calls out to the obvious bad guy cult members below, "Run away; get the buck out of here!!!"

The bad guys just ignore her as they try to fire arrows in hope to shoot her down. The heroes, taking the elevator this time, knock down the bad guys. Zapp calls out, "Get that bomb the hell out of here!"

"Yeah, hurry!" Troy exclaims as he dodges a bad guy's sword.

Twilight flew off to a town, which is somehow nearby. The mare prepares to get rid of it, but run into a carriage full of nuns, making her yelp and run the other direction. No need to endanger anyone!

Twilight flew off quickly, dodging some orphans as well as a marching band. The mare rushes over to a pond to get rid of the bomb...but saw cute ducklings down below, much to her dismay. She can't hurt any animals. Fluttershy will be pissed if she did that!

Twilight moves around the area like mad, but run into the carriage again, more orphans, the same banding bands...and a few couples with baby carriages. The Alicorn flew over to another part of the pond...with more cute ducklings.

Twilight mutter, "Some days, you just can't get rid of a bomb."

Spike reminds her, "Why do you NEED to? You can conjure up a force field around the bomb (JUST the bomb) strong enough to contain the blast."

"Wait, Spike? How did you get there?"

"My flying Flame Step move, duh! Now stop staring and get rid of that bucking bomb!!! Use the force field, remember?!"

Twilight face-hoof herself at failing to think of that herself and then produce the force-field Spike mentioned, which is, indeed, strong enough to contain the blast. One blowout later...and the danger is obtained.

"Thank Celestia." Twilight said with a smile. "Now let's get that element!"

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Meanwhile, back up in the temple, Brain Guy sighed as he tapped his foot, sighing as he watched the bomb explode around a force field.

Little did he realize that a portal opened up next to him as the Element of Generosity was randomly switched by a hand as the Element of Generosity he was holding was replaced with a look alike...

"Curses..." Brain Guy frowned as the others came back. "Okay, you passed my test, here's the Element, now if you'll excuse me; I'm going back to Pearl... probably going to punish me..."

Brain Guy then did his brain thing to teleport as Twilight smiled. "Element of Harmony, get! Let's teleport this back to the base!"

Twilight smiled as she used her horn to teleport the Element of Generosity right into the castle. "That should be safe for now..."

All of a sudden, Cambot started to ring as Twilight sighed, pushing the button. "Okay, let's see what the Forrester family wants..."

Cambot then showed an image of Pearl and Clayton, frowning as Pearl said, "So Brain Guy didn't quite get you down... disappointing..."

"But..." Clayton smirked. "Good news. We have found two MORE elements... in the same place! Can you believe it? We left Frank and Erdhart to guard them... the Element of Honesty AND the Element of Kindness!"

"And where are they?" Mike asked.

"Both are located within the Greek Times... the times of Hercules!" Pearl smiled... then blinked. "I... probably shouldn't have said that..."

"Afraid that's all we have to say... Frank? Oh, right, he's with Erdhart." Clayton frowned as he pushed the button, causing the screen to go off...

"All right!" Crow said. "The Hercules movies, seems simple enough..."

"So... by Hercules, they don't mean the... Disney Movie, right?" Twilight asked.

"Oh, THIS Hercules is way different!" Mike said. "Zapp, Troy, think you can drive us?"

"We'll try our best." Troy said.

"Great!" Joel said. "Come along, Tricia!"

Everyone blinked as they noticed Tricia Leonard was not here.

"Tricia?" Twilight asked.

"Are you asking about the scientist girl?" Troy asked. "She's over there at the corner of the tree?"

Pinkie blinked as she squinted to see Tricia Leonard holding something to her head. "What is she holding?"

"It looks like a gun..." Rainbow Dash paused... before everybody gasped.

"OH SHI-" Everyone started to panic.

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ONE INTERVENTION LATER...

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Twilight, Joel and Mike were looking at a traumatized Tricia as Mike looked down, "Uh, sorry about that. I didn't know you had suicidal thoughts."

"Yeah..." Twilight looked down "...sorry, I guess?"

Tricia sighed as she looked down.

"Are you... feeling better?" Joel asked.

"...I'm crying on the inside..." Tricia said in a monotone voice.

"WONDERFUL!" Joel smiled as he, Mike and Twilight nodded. "Let's go to the next world! Troy, Zapp, ride us away!"

"You know, we've been in a Canada movie, and not once have we done any Canada bashing..." Tom said.

"Guess we were all distracted..." Crow smiled. "Now, why don't we sing a cheerful song to bashing Canada!"

"No way!" Twilight frowned. "We're not bashing a country! They made Total Drama!"

"They also made Johnny Test. What's your point?" Crow frowned.

"Enough!" Pinkie said as she came out in a Mountie outfit. "Let us sing, shall we?"

"Oh, here we go again." Mike sighs a bit as he has seen this before.

"Let's sing!" Pinkie exclaims as a song cue came from out of nowhere. The mare begins to sing.

Pinkie: Oh, I wish I was back in old Canada,
A land which I never shall lampoon!
How I pine for the ice covering Lake Manitoba,
And the beauty that is Saskatoon!

"Allow me." Mike said as he sings next.

Mike: Oh, I wish I was stuck in the hills of Alberta,
Drinking beer with some big dumb guy trapping fur!
As he scraped and chiseled all the moose dung off his boots,
I would learn that he's the Prime Minister!

"Oh, stop that!" Twilight exclaims in annoyance, only for Crow to sing.

Crow: Oh, I wish I was in the land that gave us Peter Jennings,
Alanis Morissette, Mike Myers, too!

"Yeah!" Rainbow exclaims, thinking that Crow has seen the light, sort of.

No, I take that back, I wouldn't go there even if you paid me,
Oh, Canada, you are a place I must eschew!

"Hey, come on, stop that." Fluttershy exclaims with a frown. "That is no Canadian spirit!"

"Oh, come on, give in! I mean, after all, they gave us Ed the Sock, and Rush!" Mike points out to the ponies with a chuckle.

"Yeah, what are you defending? They're such feebs!' Crow said with a shrug.

"Okay, I'll try!" Twilight sighs, deciding to give the song poking fun a try.

"All right! Good mare!" Joel exclaims as Twilight sings next.

Twilight: (sadly) Oh, I wish I was blowing up Prince Edward Island,
And going on to bomb Ontario, heh heh!
(Harshly) The destruction of Canada and all of its culture,
Is by far my fav-o-rite scenario!

"Okay, well 'dat's a little strong...." Applejack said in concern. Even Troy and Zapp are getting freaked out by this.

"No, no, Mike and his pals were right, this is much more fun!" Twilight exclaims maniacally as she sings some more. This is fun!

Just where the hell does Canada get off sharing a border
With countries far superior to it?

"Yikes!" Troy exclaims in fright.

Why, you lousy, stinking, francophonic, bacon-loving bastards,
Your country's just a giant piece of sh-

"Whoa! Okay! Whoa!" Most of the gang exclaims quickly, stopping Twilight before she goes too far in the song.

"Calm down, stop!" Pinkie exclaims worried. Twilight sobs as she breaks down. The song has made her a big disgrace, big time.

"Oh, I'm sorry! I have no sense of tolerance! I'm a disgrace to heroes everywhere!" Twilight sobs a bit, feeling disgusted with her for going too far in the Canadian bashing.

"Reminds me of me!" Tom Servo sobs some more. "Oh, I'm a disgrace to my uniform!"

"That's ok. Calm down. Mustn't hate, mustn't hate..." Joel said, patting Tom Servo, trying to comfort him.

"At least so overtly." Crow said with a sigh of concern.

"Exactly. Must disguise our hate." Mike said as the group continues their best to comfort the hurt and freaked out duo.

Author's Note:

Wow, that was...intense, right? Anyway, next chapter involves Hercules films so stay tuned. Read, review and suggest!

Fang of course is from the fourth and fifth seasons of the Total Drama franchise.

There are references to the Adam West franchise of "Batman: The Movie".

The Triple Dent Gum is from the new Pixar film "Inside Out".

Twilight's referenced to Tuerto referenced how I used to feel sorry for the villain of "Total Drama Equestria"...until I came to my senses and say to hell with him already.

As for the reason why the elements were switched...that plot will be explained later.

The song at the end (as well as Twilight and Tom Servo breaking down) came from the Final Sacrifice episode of MST3K.