A Blueblood for Everyone

by Macgyver644200

Blueblood the Steely - Rarity

"Are you alright?"

Prince Blueblood looked up at the two unicorns standing over him in the hospital corridor, a yellow mare and a grey stallion with glasses. Blueblood had a long gash running down his face that had just been stitched together and he had just stopped crying. "Do I look alright?" He didn't even bother with the accent.

Jet Set rubbed the area around his glasses. "Yes, that was a stupid question. Will you recover?"

Blueblood swallowed, then nodded. "Alley Cat, though... he was just moved to the CTD ward."

Upper Crust scowled. "And did one of the doctors actually use that term?"

Blueblood nodded. "She seemed rather sleep deprived, though."

Jet Set looked over at her. "Connective Tissue Disease?"

"Circling The Drain. I'm still going to have words with some of the doctors here. That sort of parlance in front of patients is just inexcusable." With that, she stormed down the hall, muttering about back-country doctor/veterinarians.

Jet Set turned back to Blueblood. "What were you doing?" Jet Set asked. "Don't just say that you were in an alleyway. How did you get to that alleyway? You've managed to avoid being mugged for a whole year so far; what changed now?"

Blueblood turned away from him, and his frown deepened. "Blueblood, please don't tell me that you gave that stallion money."

"He was an old friend and his home was about to be foreclosed on," Blueblood said. "I couldn't just let him be thrown out on the streets."

"Yes, and the sudden influx of money caught the attention of other poor ponies! You fed the fish, but you put blood in the water, too! And now the sharks have attacked."

Blueblood's mouth opened, but no words came out. For a long time, he worked at it, but he said nothing. Instead, his eyes started to water and he started to sniffle. At last, he put his head in his hooves and started sobbing. Jet Set frowned at him for a moment, but sat down next to Blueblood and put a leg around him. Blueblood leaned into him, causing tears to run down his friend's suit.

"She chose wrong," Blueblood sobbed. "I can't do this."

Jet Set patted him on the back, but said nothing.

<*>

Dear Prince Blueblood,
We would like thank you for your contribution. In spite of our recent legal trouble, you'll be thrilled to know that we are continuing our work with...

Blueblood crumpled up the letter with his hooves and threw it against the wall. Then he shivered. One day he'd have to fix that broken heater, just as soon as he could find enough wire. He threw a second frigid blanket over himself and tried to think warm thoughts. Given the freezing January rain just outside and the draft running through the house, he failed.

"Well, at least I have a roof over my head now," Blueblood hissed bitterly to himself.

CLANG-CLANG!

Blueblood's head rose at the sound of his doorbell. Then it rang again. And again and again and again. Blueblood growled. Some stupid child trying to yank the chain off of his doorbell, no doubt.

Or somepony who needs help.

Blueblood smacked himself on the head. "No," he whispered. "You're overreacting."

It could be somepony who needs a helping hoof. Maybe a house collapsed on top of somepony. Maybe they need a strong stallion to get somepony to a hospital. Maybe somepony's trying to kill them.

Blueblood stood, shaking the blankets off of himself, and sped out of the room. In the hallway, he effortlessly clambered across a wide plank covering a hole in the floor. Then he came to the stairs, nimbly stepping on the steps that hadn't rotted away. Finally, he stormed past the array of pots and pans in front of the sitting-room doorway and opened the door.

The door then slammed him into the wall.

"I am s-s-so t-t-terribly sorry to imp-p-p-pose upon you," he heard a slightly raspy mare saying as things were wheeled in, "b-b-but my money and t-t-train ticket were s-st-stolen by a p-p-pickpocket and y-y-you're the only d-d-door that opened. M-m-m-my magic was failing and if I d-didn't get these out of the r-r-rain soon, they'd r-r-run!" She spent several seconds coughing, sounding like a goose honking. After that, she spent several more seconds just breathing, then gasped. "...oh, C-C-Celestia! I'm s-so t-terribly sorry!"

The front door slammed shut and Blueblood fell to the floor. He groaned as he forced himself upright and shook himself. He turned to face the intruder. She was a unicorn; white, with a purple tail that hung damp behind her. She was all dressed up in a light dress, with a scarf covering her mouth and nose and stylish sunglasses. Obviously she'd been out on the streets for quite a while, since she was shivering and soaked to the bone. "Hello, P-P-P-Prince B-B-Blueblood," she stammered, attempting intimidation.

Blueblood frowned at her. She looked familiar. The ponies who would know him were a surprisingly homogeneous group even if he had been paying attention to them. Her color scheme was in vogue at the moment and he didn't see too many cutie marks. "Hello," he said guardedly.

Are you just going to let her freeze on you?

"Look, whoever you are, you should probably get out of those clothes. You'll freeze to death if you don't." Blueblood walked to the bathroom and grabbed the only clean-ish towel left on the rack.

When he returned, the mare had pulled her top off and was trying to pull her skirt down when she noticed him. Then she glared at him again and motioned for him turn around. Blueblood rolled his eyes and turned around, levitating the towel into hooves reach. Finally, he felt her grab the towel out of his magic. "N-now you may t-turn around."

Blueblood did so. "Did I have to turn around in the first place?" he asked.

Despite her head and face now being covered by the towel and her sunglasses still being on, Blueblood could feel her glowering at him. "Y-yes," she spat. "It's called propriety. Then again, I shouldn't be surprised that your knowledge is lacking in that department. You demonstrated your ineptitude at that a long time ago, back at the Grand Galloping Gala. Come to think of it, you sound different. A little more brassy."

"Of course I sound different," he said. "This is my actual voice. Did you think I sounded like Roderick Ponce von Featherbottom all the time?" He waved his hoof at her. "Don't answer that; of course you did."

"Yes, because whenever I meet somepony, of course I suspect that they have a false voice, especially when it's so close to my ow-"

She was interrupted by a series of hacking coughs. Blueblood stared at her. "Are you alright?" he asked gently.

When she was finished coughing, she continued glaring at him. "I'm not going to die on your floor, if that's what you're asking. Neither are you going to catch it. I promise I'll be out of your mane as soon as the rain lets up."

Blueblood hesitated a moment before nodding. Then he frowned out a window. "If I ever find out who created this unauthorized rainfall," he growled, "I'm going to tan her hide. Not only is it idiotic, it's deadly."

"Deadly?" the mare asked.

Blueblood turned to her. "For the homeless ponies on the street, as well as anypony who just passes out." He sniffed. "You'd think that between four elements of harmony saving Equestria, more than one of them could spare some time for publicizing more mundane issues."

The mare gave him an odd look, but her irritation faded as she looked out the window. "Yes, it is awful. And to think I was worried about getting a hot bath."

Blueblood hmphed. "You'd have to find some hot water first. The water heater is broken."

The mare hmmed, then shivered. "No offense, but could I trouble you for a blanket?"

Blueblood pinched his lips together, but nodded and walked to the couch. "They're all cold, though, and the heater won't work until I can get some wire, so you'll want to use a Warming Charm once it's on." Blueblood retrieved the blanket and draped it over the mare. "If this goes into the night, you can have the couch," Blueblood said. "There aren't any holes in this room so you should be-"

The mare staggered on her hooves. Unbidden, Blueblood dashed to her side and propped her up. "Bad idea," she moaned. "Head hurts too much."

Blueblood frowned as his horn lit up. "Come on," he said while charming the blanket, "let's get you on the couch."

With his help, the mare staggered over to the couch and fell onto it. Then she slowly lifted her legs and tucked them under the blanket. She let out a groan as she rolled onto her back. "Thank you," she told Blueblood.

"Not at all," Blueblood said.

A loud growl sounded from the bowels of his guest. Blueblood swore he could see her blush through the towel. "I don't suppose you have anything to eat, do you?" she asked.

She needs a warm meal. She's been out in the cold and she's obviously ill. You can risk going hungry better than she can.

Blueblood gave her a good hard glare before he walked back into the kitchen. "Nothing fancy," he called out.

"That's alright," the mare called out before coughing again.

Blueblood looked through the pantry, but it was empty. Likewise with the refrigerator. It was only after sweeping his hoof through the cabinet under the sink that he found a can of pea soup. He kept looking through the kitchen, but he could find nothing else. Thus, he grabbed a saucepan, opened the can, and poured the soup into the pan. He then walked back into the sitting room and over to the fireplace, but stopped. The coal bucket was empty.

You're not going to make her eat it cold, are you?

Blueblood rolled his eyes and magically knocked a section out of the floor. Then he broke the wood into pieces, placed it under the grate, and lit it with his magic, placing the saucepan on top. "Shouldn't take long," he said.

"Alright."

Blueblood turned around. "Ugh, why're you still wearing that towel?" he asked.

The mare's sunglasses grew wider. "Uh...uh..."

"Just take it off."

"NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!"

Blueblood put his hoof to his face. "You're going to have to take it off to eat, your highness; you might as well just get it over with."

"No I don't! I'll just... move a little bit around the mouth. I don't have to take it off!"

Blueblood grabbed the towel in his magic. "Just take it off!"

The mare held it down with her hooves. "NO!"

Blueblood and the mare wrestled with the towel. "What, do you have a pimple on your face?" Blueblood asked.

"No!"

"Is your makeup running?"

"No."

"Then why are you so attached to this towel?"

With one final hard yank, the towel and glasses came off, and Blueblood staggered back at what was revealed. The areas around the mare's eyes and nose were bright red, with huge dark bags under her bloodshot eyes. "Good grief!" Blueblood cried. "You look like Death warmed up!"

The mare glared at him. "Still as tactful as ever, I see."

Blueblood growled at her. "You're obviously too sick to go out, but you're still running around over..." temporarily mute, he motioned towards the rack of clothes, "...that?!"

"Those are important!"

"They're patterns of cloth sewn into fancy shapes! They're almost utterly useless! It would have been better if they'd been made into crash pads!"

CRASH!

Blueblood and the mare whipped their heads around. The ceiling had fallen in, and a plume of debris coated the air. Blueblood rolled his eyes, but the mare rushed to the wreckage. With a growl, Blueblood magically grabbed her. "Stop!" he hissed. "If the ceiling hasn't finished falling, then-"

The mare wasn't paying attention. She was staring at the wreckage, eyes starting to water. Then her head fell and she started to sniffle. Finally, she let out a loud wail.

"AUUUUUUGH, EVERYTHING'S RUIIIIIIIIIIIIIINED!"

The mare fell to the floor and bawled. As she continued to babble, Blueblood scowled, his eyes about to pop out of his head.

You can't say it. She's obviously crazy. If you say it, she's going to get crazier.

Blueblood's lips curled up, revealing his teeth. 'She has to hear it,' he thought. 'I'm doing her a favor.'

"Oh, pull yourself together, you high-class twit!" he snarled.

She stopped. "A bunch of useless junk got turned into more useless junk, big deal. It shouldn't even be yours; you should be at home in a fancy-pants, gold-leaf, bubble bath! But nooooo, that would interfere with shopping and fleecing some poor desperate stallion out of his money. I weep for the poor idiot who marries somepony like you! Maybe in three months, he'll be able to afford a pet rat for compa-"

SMACK!

Blueblood stumbled back, landing on his side. He rubbed at his chin then looked up. The glare he received made him shuffle backwards, bumping into the couch.

"How dare you." the mare hissed. "How dare you insult me like that! I'll have you know that Rarity, bearer of the Element of Generosity, is no leach! Any money to my name I earned fairly, by blood, sweat, and tears! Furthermore, based on your current quarters, you are the last pony to be lecturing me about how I spend my money! Where did yours go, bad weekend in Monacolt?" She put a hoof to her head. "No, don't answer that. Ugh, and to think I ever found you appealing." She turned. "I'm leaving before I-"

Her horn flickered out, dropping her sunglasses, as she started coughing again. As it continued, her knees started shaking before she collapsed. As she stopped coughing and started sucking down breath, Blueblood stared at her. He had seen her; not just at the Gala but a few months earlier, at the launch of the Navigator prototype...

<*>

"What am I doing here?" Blueblood asked.

Princess Cadance looked at Blueblood. "Rebuilding your relationships with high society so that you can resemble a functioning member of royalty." She poked him in the chest. "You're also talking to the sister you seem to have forgotten about, given that I haven't heard from you in a month."

Blueblood went a little pink at those words. "Ah," he said. "Sorry. I've been a little..."

Blueblood fell silent. "I heard," she said. "I'm not mad at you; I'm just concerned is all."

"I'm still sorry," Blueblood told her. "Princess Luna mentioned that Shining Armor proposed to you?"

Cadance nodded. "He did."

Blueblood squinted at his sister's horn. "He did remember to give you a ring, didn't he?"

Cadance winced. "He did. It's a very nice ring, but I heard about the hospital going under and..."

Blueblood frowned. "I don't do that anymore. Besides, I'm not mad at you; I'm mad at the high-class fribbles who withdrew their support." He sighed. "It's weird: the only rich ponies who actually care about charity are the very richest."

Cadance smiled. "Well, there's one more," she said. "I can't stay, I've got a meeting, but another reason you're here is because I want to introduce you to someone who might lift your spirits a little. The Element of Generosity is getting the rich to help the community."

Blueblood stared at her for a moment before he shrugged. "About time," he mused, no malice in his voice. "Who is she?"

"Her name is Rarity. She's a unicorn with white fur and an indigo coiffure. She's a fashion designer. She should just be milling around, I don't think the host has anything planned for her."

"Alright." Blueblood smiled. "I think I'll go find her."

Cadance beamed at him. "You go do that."

Blueblood turned around and set off into the crowd. It wasn't long before he spotted someone. "Good afternoon, Miss Rarity," he said.

Cadance winced. "Please don't use the voice," she moaned.

The earth mare turned around. "I beg your pardon?" she asked.

<*>

Seven trend-followers later, Blueblood gave up and just milled around the crowd, saying nothing. Eventually he got called up on the podium due to his princeliness, although no-one made any attempt to talk to him. Then another mare was called up to actually launch the ship. A name wasn't given, since everyone apparently knew it and Blueblood didn't care enough any more to ask. Then months went by and Blueblood forgot all about her. And now here she was coughing on his living room floor.

Blueblood lifted the blanket and magically tucked it around her. "Please take it easy," he told her.

Rarity glared at him. "I'm sorry about how I've been treating you," he said. "You're a friend of my sister's and if I had known who you were-"

"If you let me tell you at the Gala," Rarity rasped.

Blueblood winced. "I'm sorry."

Rarity turned away from him, but then started coughing again. She shuddered all over and Blueblood could see tears coming out of her eyes. Eventually, the fit ended, and Rarity pointedly faced away from Blueblood. Blueblood frowned, but then his ears perked up. Unbidden, he walked over to his closet, quickly pulling on his white and slightly stain-spotted coat, shirt, and trousers. He checked his coat pocket and pulled out a small bag. He checked through it, then walked into the living room and laid down to look under the furniture. He spotted a coin and levitated it into the bag. "I'll be right back," he told Rarity. Ignoring the roll of her eyes, Blueblood walked to the front door and stepped out into the rain.

Seven minutes later, Blueblood returned, sopping wet. Rarity was on the couch. He threw his coat and trousers on the floor, shook off some excess water, and retrieved a bottle of cough syrup from a coat pocket. "Here," he said, pouring some of the liquid into the provided cup and levitating it in front of her, "this should help."

Rarity looked at him, surprisingly gently, but then another coughing fit racked her body. She grabbed the cup and chugged the medicine. Then she took a few gentle breaths as Blueblood retrieved the cup. Rarity turned back to him. "Thank you," she said.

"You're welcome." Blueblood screwed the cap back on the bottle and set it on a nearby table. He pointed at the clothing under the rubble. "I assume you made those?"

Rarity nodded curtly. "Yes. I spent a whole month working on them, the last three days with the flu."

"Then why are you out here?" Blueblood asked her. "Based on how horrible your cough is, you should be home resting. You can afford to miss one fashion show: you're friends with four princesses."

Rarity glared at him. "So if I missed one, ponies wouldn't start muttering about how I'm really a country bumpkin who only got this far by kissing up to a princess?"

"...yes, I see your point." Blueblood looked over at the saucepan. "I think the soup's probably overdone."

Blueblood levitated the pan off of the fire and onto the hearth. "Hold on, I'll find you a bowl." He walked into the kitchen, picked out the least-chipped bowl he could find, and walked back into the living room. He laid the bowl down in front of Rarity and tipped the saucepan's contents into it. "There you go."

Rarity pushed the bowl towards him. "I'm sorry," she said, "I'm being needy enough."

Blueblood pushed it back over to her. "You're sick. You need something to eat."

Rarity pushed it towards Blueblood again. "I can't take the last of your food. I'll go without tonight."

"I insis-" Blueblood stopped, then scowled. "Were you snooping around?"

Rarity averted her eyes. "Uhh..."

Blueblood opened his mouth, but could say nothing. He turned on his hooves and stormed away. "I'm sorry," Rarity said. "I just..." Rarity tapered off.

"You wanted to know why a prince is living in a rat hole, is that it?"

"I-if you don't mind," Rarity said timidly.

Blueblood stomped off up the stairs. He grabbed the letter and stormed back down to the living room. "Here." He tossed the letter at Rarity's hooves. "This is why."

Rarity uncrumpled the ball of paper and smoothed it out. After a moment she stopped. "Ah. I got burned by these ponies, too." Then she looked up at Blueblood. "Wait, how would this-"

"Keep reading," Blueblood told her.

Rarity turned back to the letter. When she got to the end, she recoiled. "Mon Celestia!" She looked back up at Blueblood. "Is this... did you give away-"

"Almost my entire stipend, yes."

Rarity blinked. "But, why?"

Blueblood exhaled through his teeth. "Because I don't want it. This house-" he motioned around him, "this is what I grew up in. After having spent the first twelve years of my life in a hovel like this, near the bottom of the bottom, this is where I feel the most right. When Celestia noticed my skills with language, I was forced to live with her by my father so that my life could mean something. My old friends either left me or started begging me for money. Any new friends I tried to make wanted nothing to do with the street rat Celestia picked up in an alleyway. That left three people who'd associate with me: my legal guardian, my sister, and my little brother."

Blueblood sat. "I was eventually named Equestria's Supreme Ambassador-at-Large. That's how I came to be called a prince. I spend eleven months a year in foreign hostels, the only place where I feel like I'm not costing anypony too much money. Occasionally I get called back back when either 'Aunt' Celestia or Cadance decide I need to mingle with the inbreeds again." He sighed. "And I tried helping the poor. I built a hospital and helped forgive a few debts. But then the hospital closed after 'too many thefts' and a friend of mine..."

Blueblood tapered off. Before Rarity could say anything, he cleared his throat. "I still can't stop thinking about the issue. Since I've proven I can't handle money, I give it all away to some group that can. I don't really care to who. I've lived like this before; I can do it again." He sighed. "And, here I am: cold, hungry, and still not at peace."

Blueblood lay down, frowning into the fire. He said nothing, just sat miserably.

"You don't have to be cold."

Blueblood turned to his guest. "You said you needed wire for your heater?" Rarity asked. "If you can get it out from under the rubble, several of my dresses have wire in them."

Blueblood turned his gaze to the ceiling above the pile. He couldn't see any signs of another collapse. "You spent a lot of time on those dresses," he said to Rarity.

"They're useless now," she told him. "You might as well take them apart."

<*>

Blueblood closed up the panel. "IS IT WORKING?" he called down.

"YES!" Rarity called back up.

Blueblood crawled down the attic ladder and back onto the second floor. "Thanks for the wire."

"You're welcome." There was a pause. "You're surprisingly handy," she continued. "You sort of cook, and you know how to do maintenance. What else can you do?"

Blueblood descended the staircase. "I can speak five languages, nothing fancy, I can start a fire in almost any condition, and I know first aid." He laid down. "Not a whole lot of high-class stuff like wine appreciation or jousting." He sipped his half of the soup and smiled at Rarity. "I'm not the prince you were looking for, am I? All patents of nobility and old money and all."

"I wasn't really looking for money," Rarity said, "although that wouldn't have been a bad thing. Mostly I was just looking for a gentleman: somepony who'd treat me like a princess, who'd lavish me with affection every day and remind me of how he's lucky I came into his life. Who'd let me take dote on him when I could and who'd grow wrinkled and grey with me." Rarity blushed. "It was a little silly in hindsight. I do owe you an apology for making presumptions about you without getting to know you first. And for barging in on you tonight. I promise I'll repay you for everything I've taken."

Do you really need it?

Blueblood made a noise as if to speak, but nothing came out. Rarity frowned for a moment, but then her eyes widened. "I can pay to have your home repaired, if that would help." Rarity proposed. "Do you know anypony who could use the work and would appreciate fair wages for services rendered?"

Blueblood looked into Rarity's eyes, but only saw sincerity. Then he put a hoof to his chin, pondering the question. However, after a few moments, Blueblood could find nothing. He broke into a relieved smile. "I can think of a few names. However, I think I'll tell you in the morning."

Rarity smiled. "Very well. I should probably be retiring, too." She pulled the blanket over her. "Good night, your highness."

Blueblood bowed his head. "Good night, Miss Rarity." He walked for the stairs, but quickly stopped. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome."

Author's Note:

I wanted to make Blueblood sound like Cary Elwes; I'm not sure I succeeded. Curse my grasp of human languages. In any case, a chapter has been released for this month, I await your comments, compliments, and criticisms. And I get the sinking feeling that Applejack may have been overhyped... In any case, next month, Rainbow Dash!

(I hope.)

Comments

[Dart Gryphon]

First

[The Great Derpsby]

Hmmm. So, this Blueblood would be a bastard? His story seems to imply that.

[Macgyver644200]

6250270 Well, yes he can be, when he puts his mind to it.

Regarding the other interpretation of the word, however, I didn't consciously imply it. I'm not dismissing the idea. but how did I imply it?

[Macgyver644200]

6250217 You know, you're the first person who's done posted that to me on any of my stories?

[RadicalDishonesty]

You have a consistent problem in your paragraph construction:

"Oh, pull yourself together, you high-class twit!" he snarled.

She stopped. "A bunch of useless junk got turned into more useless junk, big deal. It shouldn't even be yours; you should be at home in a fancy-pants, gold-leaf, bubble bath! But nooooo, that would interfere with shopping and fleecing some poor desperate stallion out of his money. I weep for the poor idiot who marries somepony like you! Maybe in three months, he'll be able to afford a pet rat for compa-"

The problem here, is the second paragraph. In it, you start with narration for Rarity, then immediately move to Blueblood talking. I had to read this section three to be certain of who was talking. And this happens often. This is just the most egregious example because there are no dialogue tags during Blueblood's rant.

You need to treat action tags like they are dialogue tags if they are right next to dialogue, because typically they imply that the person in the action is the one who is now talking.

[Dart Gryphon]

6250633 Now I do, but do You know that this was the first time I actual had the opportunity to do this? (Hope the grammar is right )

[The Great Derpsby]

6250629
I misread one line. I thought his father already was a member of Celestia's court and that he asked the princess to have his (illegitimate) son join him there. I also suspected Cadenza and Blueblood shared a father but not a mother, thereby being siblings, albeit half-siblings.

[Macgyver644200]

6251696 Ah. Thanks for pointing that out.

[Macgyver644200]

6252304 The 'You' shouldn't be capitalized and the 'actual' should be an 'actually', but otherwise right.

[Macgyver644200]

6252795 Ah, OK. I'll actually be getting into Blueblood's father in the next Rarity chapter.

[Shigawan]

Hey, congrats on getting a new chapter out.

I don't have a ton to say about this one. A RarityxBB pairing feels pretty common, and this interpretation didn't do too much to break any molds or approach new territory. It had BB as misunderstood and apologetic towards Rarity and made excuses for his behavior at the Gala. Personally I think Rarity would never have brought it up with him from embarrassment and some level of social grace. Sure she would have given him a hard time and would probably hint at what was bothering her, but her pride would stand between her and closure.

BB, on the other hand, has a bit of a novel personality with his generous to a fault ways. I think that is interesting, and I would like to see more of his selfish and rough side too. The more Rarity has trouble pining him down, the more interesting, me thinks.

I'm looking forward to your next chapter! Don't worry about over promising on the Applejack arc. Just take it slow and release it when you think it's ready.

[Frankie2]

I'm confused. Does this chapter have any continuity to the last chapter? I could see the prior chapter having some type of continuity but this one seems out of whack with the others.

[Macgyver644200]

6261840 Nyet. There is no continuity between chapters unless they share a mare's name.

[Frankie2]

6262226 So, these are all different takes on Blueblood, not a story outlining him. Fair Enough.

[Macgyver644200]

6261587 Thanks for the review!

Yeah, pairing Blueblood and Rarity up is something of a standard, hence why I was trying to think of something more novel to at least spice it up a bit. Thanks for the assurance! I'll be busy the next few months, hopefully they'll be kind to my inspiration.