The Magical Adventures of Travis the Troll: Episode 3 The Trials of Sir Dango XIV

by The Angry Dango of Doom

OH NO THE MUNCHIES!

Author's Note:

I already know that grammar isn't my strongest, nor is my punctuation. Mind helpin a brotha out, n telling me what I need to fix up?

Travis admired his hard work, the vents in the ceiling spewed fresh smoke, the windows perfectly sealed to not allow any of it to leave the room, and most of all his entire Kingdom sheltered the world's largest pot fields. The amount he exported to surrounding kingdoms quickly made Travis the most wealthy Troll in Equestria.

He remembered the day. Travis had set up his own room in Twilight's castle in the same fashion as the throne he now sat in. Twilight however was not fond of his recreation, she constantly forced him to take down his marvelous contraption, as its imperfections made smoke bellow from the room and castle causing the entirety of Ponyville smell of the green substance Travis was so attached to. Twilight planned to have a meeting with Princesses Celestia, Luna, and Cadence. They had all come to an agreement to kick out Travis. But his Previous actions had earned him quite the title, His deeds have earned him worthy of his own kingdom. The four Princesses came to a second agreement, create another kingdom to the west. They had told him to create a farm country, though it wasn't said for which item to be grown. With a satchel of seeds waiting to be grown in his pouches he set off to the fertile lands and the his Kingdom. In a half day's journey on Carlos' back Travis Arrived at his Kingdom, it was roughly the same size as Twilight's but had large farmland set up already. The current inhabitants awaited the Arrival of their new leader and new cash crop.

After setting himself up in the new kingdom, Travis had consulted with the head of the farms. At first they were skeptical of Travis's plan to grow the seeds. But after the first haul they clearly saw the demand for said product, and in five months the entire kingdom had profited so immensely that it had rocketed to the second most wealthy kingdom; and in a short few months was more wealthy than the top three kingdoms combined.

After recollecting his memories he peered through the haze in his throne room 'Damn 'mon I'm hungry' the munchies were kicking in.

Gathering himself, he wobbled through the hallways, being so stoned that his balance was off to the point his royal guards were not to be inside any of the rooms. He continued swaying through the halls and finally made his way to the great kitchen and to the great food cupboard then grabbed a box of Four Cheese Cheez-its, tried pouring a handful out. But only dust came out!

'Damn 'mon I need to get some more'

he made his way to the cellar where he kept a whole stock of them. When he arrived though, the entire stash was empty! He slightly panicked and checked the Cheeto stock. and it too was depleted! His mind raced 'Oh no 'mon I've bought all the Cheetos and Cheez-its in Equestria!'

Travis rushed to his study where he quickly wrote a letter to the Princess of Friendship.

"Purple horse! You need to come down to my castle immediately! Tragedy has struck my kingdom!" He quickly rolled the letter up and with a magic lighter set it ablaze to send it to the Purple Dragon.

Travis paced awaiting the Purple Alicorn to arrive and save him from his predicament. An hour passed and the Princess burst though the main doors searching for Travis.

"There's so much smoke! Travis! Is there a fire?!?" She panicked

"No 'mon, Dat be normal. I told you 'mon my kingdom be a hotbox"

"And I'm standing right in the middle of it all" She rolled her eyes

"Isn't it great 'mon?" Travis Admired his work again

"Ugh, I hate this feeling" She shook her head "What did you call me for? What's going on?!?"

"Oh, right 'mon. We've run out of munchies and we have no more stock 'mon! And dat was all of the munchies in Equestria!"

Twilight quickly grew and annoyed look on her face " You called me here for THAT! UGH you are so stupid sometimes! I have my own duties you know! I can't just up and leave Ponyville whenever I please! I have to get somepony to fill in for me!"

"But what am I going to do 'mon!"

"How about you stop being a stoner and be a Prince for once and figure your own problems out!" She left with an explosive sigh

Travis stood in shock for a moment "What a bitch 'mon"

Soon after Travis was back to thinking. He sent his top scientists to discover new ways to create munchies for his kingdom. But he was inpatient. He sought to find quick magic ways to to replenish his stash. He looked throughout his entire library of magic beings and stumbled upon one being of unknown name, it was said it live in the darkest reaches of the Badlands. Travis then planned the whole search out. He would search every cave and crevasse to locate this being and use its magic to create a never ending munchie plant that could be grown to save the kingdom. First he had to make Celestia aware of the journey he was about to embark on.

He quickly made a letter to Celestia

Dear Sun horse 'mon

It Seems as though I gotta be travelin' to the Badlands 'mon. There be this one guy there that might save my kingdom's munchie shortage.

Travis

Not long after setting it ablaze with his magic lighter. A response letter had arrived,

Dear Prince Travis

I understand you must go for your Kingdom, But shit man that place is crazy! I'mma send Luna n' Twilight with ya'll again to make sure ya get back in one piece ya dig?

Celestia

Travis Packed some goods within his old trusty sacks from his adventuring days. The Essentials Food, Water, Camp Supplies, and not to forget five pounds of high quality Pot. He grabbed the Saddle of his companion and friend Carlos and made his way to the raptor stables. The Stables had a hotbox ventilation system in it as well, and after hitting it big, Travis acquired top notch raptor bitches for Carlos.

"Ay, Carlos! We got a problem 'mon! There are no more munchies 'mon! We gotta down to da Badlands n' get some more!"

Carlos got up and shot a look at Travis as if he was saying 'how the hell we run out man!'

Travis had long known his raptor brother, and recently had grown a spiritual connection with him, almost knowing exactly what he would say if he could.

The troll quickly strapped his ally in the saddle to prepare them for the long journey.

Just as he finished two chariots arrived carrying royalty.

Luna stepped down from her's saying "Greetings Travis, It has been a while, unfortunately on such dire terms"

"Tanks' for comin 'mon" Travis lead his stead brother

The purple one Stepped down from her chariot and growled at the troll "I swear to Celestia that this will be the last time I help you!

"Twilight!" Luna was astonished " You must have some compassion for Travis! His kingdom is in dire need!"

"Well MAYBE if he were to grow actual food instead of this stupid marijuana, he wouldn't be in this situation!"

"Ay come on Twilight, dis stuff made me rich as all hell 'mon!"

Luna stepped in "He does have a point Twilight"

"Excuse me Princess, But just because it gave him the riches he has today, doesn't exactly mean it was completely ethical. I mean come on, the whole production in rural areas has gone down because of it!"

"Not my fault 'mon" Travis crossed his arms

"Equestria didn't even have marijuana before you came!"

Luna cut in again "Excuse me, but we must be heading out soon. The Badlands are far away and they are quite large."

"Yeah, Moon horse." Travis lead the group to the Chariot hangar within his own castle

The Chariot that was stationed in his hangar was odd looking, it had wheels and was red, though it didnt have a place for any pegasi to pull it, which was really odd. The front was really long and had a Picture of this one guy named Bob Marley with a sword in the shape of a marijuana leaf, and he was riding a tiger with dreads instead of a normal mane, and in both their mouths was a two foot long joint.

"What kind of chariot is this?" Luna inspected the machine

"Dat be no chariot, Moon Horse. Dat be Francesca. She be my baby 'mon. A Ferrari." Travis opened the door and sat in the driver seat "You can take da back 'mon, She seats four at once. Carlos gets shotgun though."

"Whom will be pulling such a vehicle?" Luna made herself comfortable beside Twilight in the back seats

"Francesca works under her own power 'mon" He twisted the key shooting out a loud roar and rocketing off on the dirt paths

Comments

[Dash The Stampede]

I would light up to this, but I have to pass a test >.>

After though, we'll puff outta Travis the Troll's trippy new bowl as we search for our souls on the munchie plains of gold. xD

Yyyeah, good stuff.