Agent Con Mane in Doctor Ironhoof (Under Revision)

by Fairytail

Chapter 11: A Good Place to Rest

“It’s absolutely beautiful!” gasped Sea Swirl as the three ponies left the marsh and arrived at a clearing. A great waterfall towered above them. The gushing water poured over the smooth rock of the cliff face and into the clear, sparkling pool below. The spring was wide and deep and the water was appetizingly clean. Sea Swirl wasted no time in jumping into the water to rinse the film of filth from her body. As her body touched the water her horn shined once again. She dunked her head in an out of the water like a dolphin. The clearing was surrounded by very thick trees and the roaring of the waterfall kept their voices from travelling too far.

“This looks like a good spot to rest for a while.” Joe said.

Anavua sighed heavily and lied down on the cool dirt. “That is good, for my hooves ache and tire. We shall rest while I start the fire.”

“No!” Joe snapped. “No fire. It will only draw the Diamond Dogs in. We’ll have to make due without it.” Joe approached the spring and took off his white collared shirt and rinsed it in the sparkling water. He was considering washing himself off as well when he was doused with a spray of water from Sea Swirl who had jumped out of the pool and shook the water off of her coat like a dog. She smiled apologetically and sat down on the rocks next to Joe. Sea Swirl stretched her back like a cat and lied down with her head resting on her hooves.

“You seem awfully relaxed for somepony who just had her life threatened.” said Joe. “I’m sorry I got you into this, Sea Swirl.”

“It’s ok.” she replied. “I’m used to rummaging through the jungle. My father was a zoologist and he often took me on expeditions…” Sea Swirl sat in silence for a moment. Her eyes were listless and forlorn. “Tell me, are you going to arrest Doctor Ironhoof?”

“Well somepony’s got to stop him. We can’t have him killing everypony who comes onto the island now can we?”

“It wasn't the first time. I’m pretty sure he killed my father.” said Sea Swirl in a pathetic whimper. Her eyelids were closed in thought and the color of youth dissipated from her face. Joe went back to bathing his hooves in the spring but he remained fixated on the young filly in the corner of his eyes. Sea Swirl continued, “We came to the Ponibean to study sea shells. He went to collect samples at Cockatrice Key and never came back. The locals say he drowned but he was far too good a swimmer for that.”

“What about the rest of your family?” Joe asked as we wrung his shirt dry.

“It was only ever just my father and me. We traveled all over the world until my father died. And then I started making a living here by selling sea shells.”

Joe put his shirt back on and sat down next to Sea Swirl. “What about education? You never went to school while travelling around?”

Sea Swirl sat up alongside Joe. The cold mist of the waterfall tickled their backs and Sea Swirl rubbed her hoof against the mossy stone. “I never needed it.” she said. “I have an encyclopedia. When I was a little filly I started with ’A’ and I’m at ‘T’.” She gave Joe a cheeky smile with the devilish glint of an raccoon in her eye. “I bet I know a lot more things than you.”

Joe enjoyed seeing her more playful nature resurface. He felt it best to keep the conversation going, if only so he could keep enjoying that enticing grin of her’s a little longer. “Nopony in Janeighca helped you?”

“Well there was somepony else. Until he started to do bad things to me…” the cheekiness faded and her muscles tensed back up. Joe tried to put a hoof around her shoulder but she escaped his grasp with the reflexes of a fly avoiding the swatter. She instead looked into her reflection in the spring, broken and distorted from the waves. “So I put a Star Spider in his bed. A female and they’re the worst. It took him a whole week to die.”

Joe could not believe his ears. He recounted all the lives he had taken with his own hooves. His thoughts turned to the Diamond Dog body that currently floated in the milky white swamp. His mind became dizzy and clouded and for a moment he thought he had changed bodies with the innocent filly who had reacted in disgust to his earlier actions. The naive kitten before him now emanated the dangerous aura of a hungry lioness. Sea Swirl must have saw the look on Joe’s face as she quickly shrunk down like a cornered mouse.

“Did I do wrong?” She whimpered.

Joe shook his head, for his sake more than hers, and put on his most charming smile. “Well I wouldn't make a habit out of it.”

Sea Swirl smiled in relief and moved closer to Joe. She leaned in close until their muzzles almost touched. Her tail absentmindedly dipped into the spring water and her horn glowed slightly. The magenta light reflected onto her rose colored eyes which gave the impression of a vividly beautiful sunset.

“What about you?” she asked. “Do you have a very special somepony?”

She was so close that Joe could feel her breath commingling with his. Sweat began to drip from behind his ears. “Well I…”

“Captain, quick! come see this area of the mire!” Joe and Sea Swirl both jumped in shock as Anavua galloped towards the spring. “It has all been burned by fire!”

In truth, Joe had completely forgotten about Anavua. With the swiftness of a wild coyote rummaging a litter bin, Sea Swirl hopped off the rocks. Joe could tell she was trying to avoid looking at him. He cleared his throat and went to join the manic Zebra. Anavua led Joe to the edge of the clearing and moved some shrubbery to the side. The lush green jungle turned dead and grey. All that remained of the small plants was a blanket of ash that covered dirt and stone. A once proud tree had been reduced to a larger equivalent to a used matchstick. Joe moved in closer to inspect the damage and stumbled at a sudden loss of hoofing. He looked down to see what he tripped on. It was an imprint of a large claw, about the size of a pony. He looked down the road and saw similar tracks heading down a clearly marked trail bordered by the remains of forcefully rooted trees.

“Those are Dragon tracks.” said Sea Swirl with dread. Joe snorted and dusted himself off. He had about all he could stand hearing about this foolish Dragon nonsense.

“Dragons don’t live on islands!” He retorted while emphasizing his confident reassurance.

“How do you know?” she asked. “Have you ever seen the Chimeras of the Flame Geyser Swamp? Or the Tatzlwurm that lives at the edge of Equestria?”

Joe recalled his studies of monstrology at Canterlot. He knew from his first in habitation that although such oddities were not unheard of, stranger things had been recorded. Of course, Joe had no intentions admitting the possibility, least of all to a filly who hasn't learned anything beyond the letter ‘T’. “I can’t say that I have.” was all he had to say. With the conversation having fallen awkwardly to the wayside, Joe silently turned and followed the tracks up the path of destruction with Sea Swirl and Anavua following cautiously behind.

The can’t miss claw marks continued up the mountainside towards the rocky hills. The smoldering and broken remains of a once tranquil forest framed a clear path which Joe and the others followed for about forty five minutes. As the trail climbed higher the stones became blacker. The trees and grass grew deader and the birdsong diminished until they found themselves in a quarry surrounded by nothing but rocks and dirt. Rusted wheelbarrows and broken pickaxes littered the abandoned quarry. The occasional sparkling gemstone protruded from the dull grey rocks. Several stones of every color spilled out of an old tipped over cart that rested beside the remains of a rail track. The tracks, which had mostly eroded away with time, disappeared into a pitch black cavern carved into the side of the mountain. Throughout the dead earth, litter among the chips of gemstone and twisted metal, were more claw-like imprints.

“They’re heading into that cave.” Sea Swirl felt the need to point out. The mouth of the cave was wide. Far wider, in fact, than any gemstone mine had any business being. The sides and roof of the tunnel were not supported by beams or rigging of any kind. The walls were as hard and smooth as glass and reflected a myriad of light in the dying sun. Joe realized that twilight had sneaked up on them and felt the weight of borrowed time billowing out from the tunnel and pressing down upon him. “Whatever this ‘Dragon’ is,” Sea Swirl continued, “it must be guarding something. Like its hoard.”

Joe saw it clearly in his mind: a Dragon so matured with greed that even a single talon towered over any pony foolish enough to approach the mountain of gold and gems on which it slept. Each gemstone collected made the Dragon even more ravenous for material possession. This natural lust for treasure was a simple fact of Dragon biology. Joe had encountered such beasts before. He recalled a particular mission where he had to wake such a titan who had fallen asleep among his wealth and nearly blanketed Equestria in darkness with his smoking snore. So then why, he thought to himself, am I finding this scenario so impossible to believe?

This unshakable feeling that he was missing something drove him to approach the mouth of the tunnel. His hooves crunched against the shards of gems that intermingled with the sand. Further back, Sea Swirl and Anavua huddled in fear. As Joe’s hooffalls just barely began to echo into the cave walls, he could quite clearly hear something echoing back out. The grumbling was low but steady and constant much unlike a breath. He could smell sulfur but something else as well. It was a familiar scent that reminded him of a train yard. A screeching grind rang out from the darkness and halted Joe’s progress. The sound stuttered and wretched and popped. Joe’s sight had failed him by this point. The sun nearly set and light from the cave entrance behind him had left him stranded in the darkness. Instinctively, Joe reached out a hoof. A sizzling pain shot through Joe’s foreleg. Joe let out a profanity fueled by pain that echoed through the cavern for what felt like minutes.

Joe blew on his burning hoof. Whatever he had touched radiated a nasty heat. Joe looked at his hoof and thankfully it wasn't hurt too badly aside from some discoloration. Joe the gulped loudly as he came to the realization that he could see. Joe stared forward and found himself in the gaze of two glowing, yellow eyes.

Comments

[TheWraithWriter]

A James Bond homage/parody starring ponies? Oh yes please.

I'll be taking a proper look at this in November on account of the literacy hell that One-Shotober is like to be.

(Puns!)

[Fairytail]

5040590 Great. Hope you enjoy it. This story and probably the next one will be done by then.