The Secret Diary of Princess Celestia

by The Isapie

The Change

Twilight did not sleep that night.
She stayed awake, translating the entries with spells.
She did not hear her leaking tap, or the awkward sounds that Spike and Rarity were making next door.
She read all the guilty little secrets of her mentor. She read about her and Luna's mother, Aeterna, who had a warm smile and tickled her daughters and dressed like a ninja. She read about their father, Sol, whose golden mane got in the way and had taught her to speak in the Royal We. She read about Celestia's secret crush, the seapony prince Triton, who made a tiny passageway between their rooms. She read about the time Celestia had let go of her grip on the sun a little too early and it had dropped back down, scaring the s*** out of a lot of southern Equestrians. She read about all the times Celestia had tried to tell Triton she loved him. She even read about the strange Halloween she and Luna had toilet-papered the entire castle and caused a national crisis.
They'd gotten grounded for two months. Grounded meant no cake and no cookies for Celestia. No cake meant bad day for Celestia.
Eventually, she hit an entry in broken Standard Equuish. She tried to remove any spells on it but only came up with a hot chocolate spill.
Carefully, Twilight read the entry.
Entry 107
Dear Diary,
This is soooo exciting! I can finally write an entire entry in New Equuish! I really didn't think I'd be able to do this, but it only took a few months!
I'm twelve now, Diary, so you are officially 11 years younger than me... or so.
A lot has changed since I last wrote in you. I can now fluently speak and write in New Equuish, and my vocabulary is getting wider and wider by the day.
Of course, at home, I still use Standard Equuish and only Standard Equuish.
The best thing is, Triton is still here. He says he's staying here until he can get a PhD (a Pony Horsey Degree, according to Triton), but he says it will take years and years. This is good for our relationship. I think we will get into a steady relationship in a few years.
From now on, diary, I will only write in New Equuish, to practice for the day I must rule Equestria. Lulu is learning New Equuish as well, and she can speak a bit, but her written word is horrifying.
I'm sorry for this sudden change, Diary, but it's nice because you can learn New Equuish too.
Night night!
Tia Solar

Author's Note:

Sorry about the language. I don't really approve of bad language, but s*** is something I say all the time now. I just don't really think we should be saying it to people online because they may take it in a bad way, instead of the joking way you may have meant.
If your friend takes it badly, then they might get depressed. If they get depressed, they might commit suicide! And that means their blood is on your hands.
Sorry about the lecture. I promise I'll try to upload a new chapter asap, but I can't upload it for sure this week.
Sent from the Isapie

Comments

[The Isapie]

5051416 Thank you!
Sent from the Isapie

[Snowdrifter]

Scared the stars out of them maybe?