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Chapter 2

Applejack cringed as she walked down the quiet hallway after Pinkie Pie, cursing her boots – while useful for any and all circumstances around the farm, they weren’t exactly meant for sneaking.

“Where are we going, anyway?” Rainbow Dash whispered loudly from her side.

Applejack’s eyes cut to the shorter girl. Rainbow was having to take three steps for every two of Applejack’s strides, but sported a cocky grin, unfazed by the rapid pace.

“How am I supposed to know?” she growled, gesturing towards Pinkie Pie, who was still bouncing down the hall in front. “Ask her.”

Rainbow shrugged. “You’re the one following her.”

“I was following you following her. Why are you following her?”

“What the hell else am I gonna do? Sit around in the library?” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Pshyeah, not likely.”

Behind them, Rarity had fallen back to walk alongside Fluttershy. Fluttershy had her eyes downcast, but when she looked up, she saw Rarity, head tilted and staring at her. She jerked her head down again to stare at the floor.

“Hmm,” Rarity said. “Fluttershy, was it?” She didn’t get a response from the girl next to her, but Rarity pursed her lips and continued regardless. “You really must tell me who does your hair.”

Fluttershy’s didn't respond, only cringing as she pulled into herself and veered away from the other girl slightly.

Undeterred, Rarity moved even closer. “Your hair, dear. It’s simply marvelous! Where do you get it cut? What sort of conditioner do you use to get it so flowy? Mine has a horrible tendency to curl precisely the wrong way in the mornings.”

Fluttershy swallowed, her face starting to turn pink as Rarity's eyes lingered, studying her. Her mouth opened, then closed, then opened again.

"Have you ever considered modeling? You have an excellent figure. I suspect I could put together something lovely. Perhaps a mutually beneficial arrangement? In fact, if—"

“We’re heeeeere!” Pinkie called out, Fluttershy breathing out a sigh of relief at being rescued as Rarity turned away.

Pinkie had stopped right in front of a locker that stood out from the rest, its front covered in a messy collage of brightly-colored construction paper. She stepped up and spun the lock back and forth until a loud click signaled its opening. With exaggerated caution, she edged the locker open the slightest crack, leaning to peek inside. “Um. I’m going to need a little help though.”

Applejack stepped forward, brow furrowed as she tried to see inside. “With what?”

Pinkie eased the door open further with a grim look of determination. As soon as she did, things started tumbling out, and her hands moved in a flash to catch them. Before she could say a word, Applejack found her arms loaded with junk. A single blue tennis shoe, then a handful of kazoos, then a portable air pump, then a messily-folded apron, and finally, at the top of the pile, a bright yellow rubber chicken.

“What in tarnation?” Applejack muttered.

“Found it!” Pinkie cried out in triumph, pulling something out of the locker as she bounced lightly on her tiptoes.

“And what would that be?” Rarity asked, craning her head to try and catch a glimpse of Pinkie’s goal.

“Nuh-uh,” she said. “It’s a secret! ...For now.”

“Pinkie…” Dash said, her voice betraying exasperation.

Pinkie slipped the object, something in a plastic container, into her voluminous hair. “Don’t worry! I’ll tell you as soon as—” She stopped, going from bouncing to complete stillness, with the exception of her nose. Her nose wiggled like it had a life of its own.

“Are you okay?”

“Sssssh!” Pinkie whispered. “Everyone freeze. Now!”

Her eyes darted to twenty feet back, where a second hallway crossed theirs, and the others found themselves naturally turning to look. That’s when they heard the heavy footsteps echoing from around the corner, and Pinkie didn’t need to say a single word more.

The girls watched, still standing frozen in the hallway, as Assistant Vice-Principal Iron Will came into view, slowly but deliberately strutting down the hall. He grunted and grumbled in a litany of subvocal noises as he stared straight ahead, lost in thought.

He was only halfway past them in the hall when Applejack noticed the rubber chicken slipping from its position on the top of the pile of junk in her arms. Her heart pounded as she shifted, trying to balance the stupid thing, but it was an overreaction. The chicken ever-so-slowly slid off the top, falling out of her arms and towards the floor…

But the artificial poultry found itself interrupted mid-fall by Rainbow Dash. She stood on one leg, having moved in a flash to lean forward and catch it with one hand, her other leg flung out behind her to maintain her balance.

They remained in that ridiculous tableau, Applejack still managing to balance tower of junk and Rainbow Dash looking like some sort of ballet dancer in her pose. A few tense seconds took an eternity, but then Iron Will moved out of sight, having passed all of them by without even glancing to the side.

Rarity breathed out a sigh of relief, as Rainbow Dash suddenly lost her balance and began windmilling her arms. She was just about to faceplant when an arm caught her.

“That… that was too close,” Rainbow said in a low voice, eyes still trained on the crossing hall. She looked over to see that Fluttershy had been the one to help, and she blinked. “Thanks.”

“You said it,” Applejack agreed. “Pinkie, can you put all this stuff back already?”

Pinkie started haphazardly shoving the assortment of objects from Applejack back into her locker, finally closing it by shoving her whole shoulder against the door to force it to click closed.

Applejack stared off at the hall that Iron Will had vanished down. “Girls. I think we may be in a heap of trouble here." She swallowed. "He was going back to the library."

“Then we’ll just—” Rarity bit her lip. “That’s the way we came, wasn’t it?”

Fluttershy hesitantly nodded.

“We are so screwed,” Rainbow said.

“Not yet we ain’t.” Applejack reached up to the hat on her head. “We just have to beat him back. Find another way through the school.”

“We could go through the cafeteria,” Pinkie said. “There’s a door in the back that’ll get us into the hall behind the theater and that wraps around. As long as we hurry!”

“Then we don’t have any time to waste.” Rainbow Dash took off, looking back to make sure the others followed. Applejack and Pinkie Pie were at her heels. Rarity grabbed Fluttershy by the hand and drug her along.

“You have got to be kidding me!”

When Fluttershy and Rarity rounded the corner, Rainbow Dash was already futilely cursing at the metal screen that was lowered across the wide entrance to the cafeteria. They could see through the slats to the door they needed, but there was no possible way any of them could fit through.

Rainbow slammed her fist into the metal, wincing slightly at the contact. “So damn close.”

Applejack sighed and slumped against the screen as Fluttershy bent down to look at where it was very securely padlocked to the floor. “Looks like we’re up the creek now,” Applejack said.

Rarity walked forward, her mouth twisted in indecision. She closed her eyes and drew a calm breath. “Not if I have anything to say about it.”

“What?” Applejack said.

Rarity nodded to herself. “Okay. Yes, simple enough. I’ll go find Iron Will and… and… distract him somehow, and the rest of you can sneak in while he’s busy.”

“What?” Rainbow said, an edge of annoyance in her voice.

“I’ve got a rather clean record, all things considered. I might get another week of detention, but it’s better than all of us getting caught.”

Applejack frowned and opened her mouth, but Rainbow beat her to the punch.

“Like hell you are.” Her thumb jerked at her chest. “Don’t think you get to play the big hero, Princess. That’s my job. I’ll go distract him.”

Rarity’s lips pressed together in a thin line. “Really. I’m trying to help you here. You know if you’re the one to get in trouble, he’s really going to lose it.”

“So? I can handle him.”

Rarity sighed. “Oh, get over yourself.”

“Hah!” Rainbow Dash grinned. “That’s a laugh, coming from you.”

“Girls?” Pinkie said. The two ignored her.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Rarity snapped. She moved forward, standing in front of Rainbow Dash with both hands planted on her hips.

Rainbow didn’t flinch. “I mean you’re only angry because you don’t get to be the center of attention.”

“Girls!” Pinkie tried again.

“That’s not what this is about!” Rarity ground her teeth together, glaring at Rainbow Dash. “You know what? Fine! Go provoke him, and enjoy your detention too. You obviously deserve it!”

Rainbow Dash smirked. “Oh, so you’re backing out now?”

“If you want to self-destruct, far be it for me to stand in your way," Rarity fired back.

"Oh yeah?" Rainbow Dash barked out, leaning forward.

"Yeah!" Rarity snapped, moving forward herself until their faces were only inches apart as they stared each other down.

“Shut up you two!” Applejack yelled, earning a moment of silence. She gestured over to Fluttershy, who held the screen up about two feet from the floor. Pinkie Pie waved, already standing on the opposite side.

Rainbow Dash blinked. “How did—”

“She picked the lock,” Pinkie said cheerfully. Fluttershy’s eyes remained fastened to the floor as the girls stared at her.

“C’mon,” Applejack said. “Don’t just stand around.”

The girls quickly ducked under, and Fluttershy carefully locked the screen back down to the floor with the padlock. She slipped a pair of pins back into her hair.

“And… how exactly do you know how to pick locks?” Rarity asked.

Fluttershy leaned forward so her hair covered her bright-red face.

“We’ll discuss it later,” Applejack said. “Now it’s time to get.” She took off in a loping gait, and the others followed, even as Rarity snuck another glance back at Fluttershy, her eyebrows furrowed.

By the time they made it back to the library, Rainbow Dash had pulled ahead of Applejack. Applejack grimaced, certain that the other girl was just making it a point to get back first, and the arrogant look of triumph that Rainbow flashed right before ducking inside confirmed her suspicion.

Applejack hung back at the door, waiting as Rarity brushed past, and then Fluttershy. Pinkie was right behind them, and Applejack let out a quiet sigh of relief as she turned and—

And Pinkie went the opposite way, darting into the administration office. She twirled to slide around to the other side of the desk and grabbed a pen and a pad of post-it notes, scribbling away furiously.

“Pinkie!” Applejack whispered. “Get over here!”

Her blue eyes looked up, sparkling with mischief, and she raised a finger. “One sec!”

“There’s no time, he’ll—”

She heard footsteps. Coming from right around the corner and down the hall.

Applejack scooted back into the library, staying near the door to still peek across the hall. She could make out Pinkie fiddling with something at the desk.

“He’s coming!” she whispered, as loud as she dared, even as the footsteps drew nearer. She glanced back and forth for some means of cover that’d still let her see out into the hallway. The closest she got was a fake plant, and she crouched down behind it, still pretty much in plain sight but crossing her fingers that Iron Will wouldn’t choose to come directly into the library.

...Though if he didn’t come into the library, he’d go into the office, and that was just as bad. Her fingers tightened on the brim of her stetson as she waited.

Iron Will didn’t even spare the library a first glance, and she saw his broad back disappear into the office. She held her breath in anticipation.

Any minute now.

Aaaaaany minute now.

Pinkie Pie appeared, hurriedly crawling on hands and knees out of the office and across the hall.

“How did you—”

Applejack didn’t get anything else out. She and Pinkie almost collided, before Pinkie spun around gracefully and grabbed her by the collar to drag towards the tables. “Gogogogo!” she said.

“Wh—”

“What is the meaning of this?” a thundering voice roared.

Applejack didn’t waste any more time and the two of them scrambled across the room to dive into their chairs. They quickly affected expressions of innocent nonchalance. Applejack forced herself to breathe slowly and evenly, just in time to see Iron Will stomp into the library.

“Who did this?” he shouted. He waved something wildly in his meaty hand, and Applejack recognized the plastic box as the thing Pinkie had earlier retrieved.

“Did what, sir?” Rainbow said.

“Don’t play smart with me!” He slammed one fist against the closest table and Applejack flinched, certain she had heard the wood crack. He set down the object, and the girls peered at it.

It was a cupcake, extra-large with chocolate frosting. A yellow post-it note adorned the side of the plastic container, with a message written in large, loopy handwriting:

If you’re feeling kinda grumpy
Cause your morning’s going bumpy
You don’t need to yell and fight
Go ahead and take a bite
Cupcakes!

Next to the message, there was a doodle of a cartoonish pony, rearing back with a huge smile on its face.

Applejack felt her eyes magnetically drawn to Pinkie Pie, but she forced them to snap back to Iron Will.

“I wouldn’t know, sir,” Rarity said calmly. “We’ve been here the whole time.”

“Yep,” Rainbow said.

Iron Will bared his teeth. “Then who left this on my desk?”

“Could have been anyone.” Rainbow shrugged. “Maybe the janitor wanted to be nice.”

“Mm-hmm,” Pinkie chirped.

Even Fluttershy managed a nod, if not actual words.

Iron Will sternly glared at each in turn before his eyes fell on Applejack. “Is that correct? You were here the whole time?”

Applejack felt beads of sweat break out on her forehead. All the other girls were looking at her, she could feel it. And Iron Will himself was even worse, glaring so hard she was afraid he could see right through her.

“I…” she croaked out, her mouth suddenly dry. She tried again. “We’ve all been together this whole time. Honest.”

Iron Will’s eyes narrowed. “You think you can trick me. You think you can make a fool out of Iron Will?”

Rainbow shook her head. “Of course not, sir. It wasn’t any of us. And unless you can prove it…?”

Iron Will growled to himself, but didn’t say anything further. After one final sweep across the five girls, looking for some sign of weakness or guilt, his eyes dropped down to the box. He picked the post-it note off of the plastic and slowly, deliberately tore it into tiny pieces, letting them flutter to the ground.

“For the record,” he said. “I hate cupcakes.”

He grabbed the cupcake and turned, pausing only to fling it down into the trashcan by the door with a thunk. He didn’t look back as he stormed across the hall to his office.

The five of them let out a collective sigh of relief.

“Thanks,” Pinkie murmured.

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Like we would have snitched on you to a creep like him.”

Pinkie stared down, still looking subdued.

“What’s wrong?” Rarity asked.

“Who doesn’t like cupcakes?” Pinkie looked up, her face stricken. “That’s… that’s horrible.”

“Forget about it,” Applejack said. “He’s just a jerk.”

“Well,” Pinkie said. “At least now I don’t feel so bad.”

“For sneaking out of the library?” Rarity asked.

“No, for spiking his coffee.”

The library was silent.

“W-with what?” Rarity choked out.

Pinkie slouched down in her chair and waved a hand. “You know. Sedatives.”

Rainbow Dash stared at her for a long moment. Then she stood up and walked over to the doorway to look out across at the office. She saw Assistant Vice-Principal Iron Will with his head pressed against his desk, snoring. The coffee cup next to him was half-empty.

She turned back to the other four.

“Pinkie Pie, I think you might be my new favorite person.”

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