The Journal Of Lyra

by RainbowKnight

"I can do it!"

Hello everyone! My name’s Lyra, and I am obsessed with humans. Of course, they are so fascinating. I mean, have you seen the way they walk? Neither have I, but I heard they walk on two legs. It seems like everyone else thinks I’m weird or something but I don’t let that bother me much. I am very grateful to have a friend like Bon Bon who will accept my interests in anthropology.

That’s enough of my backstory, the reason I am writing in this journal is because that I am trying something crazy. Wait for it…I am going to find a way to become a human! Yup, it is true. I am tired of living life as a pony. I want to be able to stand on two legs without feeling awkward; I want to have fingers; I want to be human.
Unfortunately, Bon Bon doesn’t like my idea. But who needs her anyways? I think I have an idea, but it is going to be complicated. You see, earlier today I bumped into Twilight. Soon, we got into a conversation about humans and other things. Of course, Twilight wanted to give me a lot of books to borrow (geez, she is such a bookworm.) but one book in particular caught my attention. I thanked Twilight and ran home. When I got there, I immediately got sucked into the book. But soon I got bored and threw it in the pile of other borrowed books I had (most people want me to borrow books about dealing with mental breakdowns. I wonder why?).

I eventually started to just bang my head on a wall. I had no ideas about becoming human. I mean, really! Hasn’t anyone ever thought of trying to become a human besides me?
I remember later at night, I was looking through one of Twilight’s history books when I found a portion of it talking about a mirror that is the gate to an alternate dimension. Could this be the portal to the human world? If it is, how will I be able to get to it? I read it was locked away up at the Crystal Empire. There has to be one way to get to it, there has to be. Days later I started to plan how I was going to do it. This is a list of ideas I put together:

1. Ask Pinkie Pie to help me.
2. Learn an Invisibility Spell (Rejected because I’m not good at magic).
3. Create a way of communicating to other ponies and find out secrets on how to get in. (I’ll call it the internet!)
4. CRUSH, KILL, DESTROY, SWAG!
5. Forget the idea above.
6. Ask Princess Cadence permission to sneak around the castle.

I know, none of these ideas will work. But you have to give me an A for effort, right? Anyways, I ditched the idea after realizing that the castle is heavily guarded (why didn’t I think of that earlier?). Oh well, maybe lightning or something will strike me and mutate my body into a human or something. Geez, maybe I should read those mental breakdown books.
Well, after writing some ideas down, I heard a knock on my door. Guess who it was; It was Bon Bon. Yup, she had come to visit me. When I asked why, she said that I had been stuck inside my house for three days. Three days; that must be an academy record! So I went outside and got a breath of fresh air. For a while, Bon Bon and I were sitting at our favorite bench, talking about Ponyville gossip. After a while, she asked why I found humans so interesting. Well, well, well, it looks like she does think I’m weird. I simply told her that she was being a hater and stormed off. As I trotted away, I heard her yelling back something to me. As if I care! I simply went to a restaurant, paid for a drink, and went home. Some ponies may think I’m barricading myself in my house, but if only they knew the things I am doing in there…Heh, nevermind, no one would ever think of walking into my house. Everyone already thinks I’m a freak who is obsessed with “mythological” creatures. I’ll show them, someday I will. When I entered my house, I trotted to my table and grabbed my notebook and started to write down ideas.

Eventually, my drink became empty. Sluggishly, I grabbed it and went to the trash can. As I threw my drink away, I heard breathing behind me that made me realize that I wasn’t alone. I quickly turned around to see Pinkie Pie standing three feet away from me. (Remember what I said about any sane pony not going in my house. To clarify this, Pinkie is not sane.) She opened her mouth and started to sing about life on a rock farm and how everything always ends in a disaster. After singing the lyrics of her song, she hopped out of my house and started screaming something about a “Hub logo”. What was that supposed to be? Oh well, everyone in this town is crazy. I shrugged it off and simply went down to my table and started to write ideas in my notebook.

I’ve officially come up with a new idea. What if I ask Twilight to turn me to a human! Of course, how could I be so ignorant! I went up to Twilight’s doorstep faster than you can say “banana” (Please don’t). After knocking on the door like a maniac, she opened the door and glared at me. You know what she said? She said “I never knew a pony could be so desperate as to nearly break down the door”. Ha! If only she could understand the situation I was in. I asked her if she could turn me human, and her response was an unamused look in her eyes followed by the door slammed in my face. You know, I’ve noticed all the ponies here are starting to act like real jerks now. Oh well, I will have to come up with a better solution.

See ya,

Lyra

Comments

[Lightning Haze]

I'm loving this already.

I don't why it fits her to be nearly psychotic but it does. I'm looking forward to more