The plan
Sombra and Twilight were camped several miles from the Crystal Empire but were well hidden. It had been a month and a half since the fight with the royal sisters and Twilight had learned a lot about black magic from her husband. During their time in hiding they had developed a plan and an army they made using the creation spell. The army was camped not far from the couples location. The lovers were observing the city under the night sky while going over the plan once more.
"Once you make your way through the city using the spell I used to become Forest Mist..." Sombra started.
"And I'll take the Crystal heart and hide it away so you and the army can march through the city." finished Twilight.
"Exactly, and when we come into the city, we will make our way toward the palace and force the Crystal princess and prince to surrender."
"Yeah... right." Twilight responded with a worried expression.
"Remember Twilight, they will never forgive you for what you did, helping me fight the princesses and what happened at Canterlot."
"Yeah. I know."
Sombra looked back at the camp and saw their army was getting for the upcoming battle. Then he turned his attention back to the city and watched the Crystal ponies who were going their lives like nothing was wrong. Would they be in for a surprise in tomorrow. He looked at Twilight who was now looking tired.
"How about we turn in for the night my dear?" Sombra said, wrapping his hoof around Twilight, pulling her close. "You are looking tired."
"That sound good to me my king. We got a big day tomorrow." Twilight replied. The two of them made their way back to their tent.
-----
Twilight and Sombra were lying in bed together. While Sombra had already gone to sleep, Twilight was awake and lost in thought. There had been something bothering her for a short while and she needed to tell Sombra. But Twilight thought that it would be better if she told him after the battle ahead so it doesn't bother him. This was a serious topic that she really needed to discus with Sombra. But Twilight wasn't sure how to explain it to him and was thinking about how to tell him.
"My love," she heard Sombra say. "What troubles you?"
"I thought you were asleep Sombra."
"I was awakened when I realized that you were not sleeping next to me."
"Sorry my love. I was just thinking."
"About what?"
"I'll tell you after the battle tomorrow."
"As you wish my dear. Now please get some sleep."
"Okay Sombra."
And with that, the couple went to sleep.
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what happens next lets watch and find out
NEED MORE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Other than that, this story is exceptionally well written, if a bit slow on updates.
Sincerely,
Bringer of Despair
NEED MOAR CHAPTERS. PLEASE HURRY UP WITH THEM.
A few paragraphs is not a chapter, it's ok to have something
short for the first chapter, but after that you have to work on making your chapters longer. In my opinion the minimum number of words a chapter should have after at least two chapters should be around 3000 words. Be in mind I'm not hating, I am just giving you some constructive criticism.
3955379
Thanks for the advise. I try to make them as quick as possible so the readers get their story as soon as possible. I'm trying my best here.
4089801 No don't do that, Quality is going to go so much farther than getting chapters out quickly. Yes some people can pull of quality and fast updates, but only really experienced authors can do that, and I am afraid that you are not one of them. Personally I would recommend re writing all your chapters and making them longer, much longer, because if you keep doing what you're doing your story is going to fall flat on its face. Once again I don't mean to hate, but I'm going to have to be honest with you, at its current state your story kinda sucks. You have good ideas, but the execution is poor. It's obvious that you are currently a novice, and that's ok, we were all novices at one point, but you should do some serious practicing, and make a lot of improvements to your writing before you start posting more content online. Remember once again this is constructive criticism, and I want you to succeed. I know what you're thinking right now 'This is my way of writing, and I like it this way', but if you want to be a better author then you're going to have to suck your pride up and listen to other more experienced people. If you want, you can message me if you have any questions, because I would be more than happy to help you.
I know I'm late for this story, but is this ever gonna continue?
Is there more?