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Startling Start2,433 words
Shipping!!!1,925 words
Squidsday Preppers1,604 words
Diabolus Ex Machina2,952 words
How Sky Got His Groove Back1,717 words
Untamable!1,679 words
Friendship is Butter3,322 words
Epilogue1,415 words

How Sky Got His Groove Back

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sky plopped down onto his rear and rested his forehead on his hand. "This is just fan-tucking-fastic!" He moaned. "We just got our asses handed to us by squids!"

"Flying squids," Bodil corrected.

"You're not helpful!" Sky barked.

"Plus they got the Twilight and her friends. Now we can't use the Elements of Harmony they were talking about," said Jason.

"And we have no idea where we are," Deadlox added.

"Elements of Harmony?" Sky repeated. "What the hell is that?"

"Sky, have you been paying attention to anything?" Asked Jason.

"I feel like that's a loaded question," said Sky.

"And I feel like you're ass-retarded," said Kuledud3. "The Elements of Harmony are only the most super stupendous, extra spectacular and legally sexual, spank my ass and call me Chad Bono, mega, super duper thing in all of existence!"

"Wh... What do they do?" Deadlox asked.

"I was about to tell you before you interrupted me you nut-f**king sack of shit!" Kuledud3 replied in an oddly pleasant tone. "Each of Twilights friends represents one of The Elements of Harmony, Laughter, Loyalty, Generosity, Kindness, Honesty, and Magic. When they're together and they have the Elements with them, they have the power to vanquish any foe. The power they have when they're together is so unbelievably amazing. It's basically like being rubbed in the nuts by Jesus Christ."

"I'm going to ignore that last sentence," Jason said.

Antvenom asked Kuledud3, "Do you know if those elements can be used without them?"

"F**k, I don't know," said Kuledud3.

"Well, looks like we lose," Sky said with a shrug. "We don't know where we are, and squids can now fly. As long as their king has the power of budder, there's really nothing we can do," said Sky.

"They also captured six girls who are ten times better at this than we are," Kuledud3 added.

"Yeah, and that too," Sky said.

Antvenom watched the spark of determination leave his friends. They were ready to give up, but they couldn't give up! Not yet. He pulled a butter apple out of his inventory and tossed it at Sky. The apple hit Sky on the head and bounced off so that Sky could catch it in his blocky hands. "The hell is this, Ant?" Sky asked. He knew what it was, of course, but he was compelled to ask anyway.

"That's butter Sky," said Ant, "That's what butter looks like. It comes in all sorts of shapes. In this case, an apple."

"Does this have a point?" Sky questioned. Taking his eyes off the apple and onto Ant."

"It doesn't come in squid shape, Sky. What that squid king guy did was unnatural. He may be using butter, but he doesn't have the power of butter. That's something that no squid can ever have!" Antvenom spoke passionately to lift the others' spirits. "That squid doesn't deserve butter, and if you're going to give up now, you don't deserve it either!" He paused and lowered his tone. "But I know you too well to think you're going to give up now." The other stood up, even Sky. They were letting themselves feel confident. "Those squids can't make the Sky army give up! And if they thing they can, then... Uh... F**k those guys!"

"YEAH!" Adam, Ty, and Jason shouted as they raised their right fists.

A second passed after the three gave their cheer. "YEA-, oh damn it," Bodil said when he realized he said it much later than his friends.

Kuledud3 rushed over to Antvenom and stood so uncomfortably close to him that their noses would be touching if they had them. He took in a long, awkward whiff of Antvenom's beard, then said, "I could f**k you right now!"

Antvenom stepped back slowly until he felt like he was at a safe distance from Kuledud3. "Okay... Anyway, we need to come up with a plan on what to do next."

"If you need TNT, I have three stacks," said Deadlox.

"How!?" Bodil exclaimed. "How did you get nearly two hundred blocks of TNT?"

"Don't worry about it."

"Where are we supposed to go?" Jason asked. "We still have no idea where we are."

"Wow, Jason, way to be a real downer," said Deadlox.

"Yeah, Jason, what the hell is wrong with you?" Asked Sky.

"You know what, Jason? You really need to stop being such a depressing sack of shit," Kuledud3 said.

Jason shook his head and sighed.

"We should just follow the road," Bodil suggested. "It only goes one way..."

Kuledud3 jumped onto the road and started running without any warning and said, "Come everyone! Follow the pink string of fate tied to my love!"

"What the hell is he talking about?" Jason asked. He, Antvenom and Bodil started following after him. Sky was going to join them too, but Deadlox stopped him by grabbing his shoulder.

"Sky," Deadlox said. "In case we don't make it, I want you to know... I... I love you."

Adam stared at Ty for a few seconds then just said, "...No," and followed after his friends.

___________________________________________________

The city of Canterlot looked like it had been abandoned of all of its pony inhabitants. In truth, they were all hiding behind locked doors. The skies were filled with flying Minecraft squids. They had come out of nowhere. The princesses were not able to protect the city when it needed it the most.

The throne room in Canterlot Castle was under new management. King Squid, who was able to breath on land thanks to his many new powers, sat, or rather, lay on the throne. A large tank of water had been added to the castle against the Throne Room's left wall. Twelve squids were able to swim freely. Three of the squids were Chad, Steve and Melissa, who had been assigned to watch the tanks other occupants. Three other squids were the two Princesses and Discord; and the last six were seemingly normal squids. However, these other squids each had a marking on their backs, the cutie marks of the mane six.

"What's going on?" Twilight asked. "Why is everything all... wet?"

"Just do what I do and blame Celestia," Discord said. Twilight looked above her and saw a squid with Discord's eyes and voice.

Twilight stammered, "Di... Discord? You're a.. a..."

"A squid," Discord finished. "Yes, and you are too."

Twilight lifted her tentacles in front of her eyes and promptly lowered them, as if she was pretending they didn't exist. She looked at the rest of the tank and realized who all was with her, the princesses, her friends, all squids. "This cannot be happening!" She shouted.

"I like to think of it as a learning experience," said Pinkie Pie.

"How? How is this a learning experience?" Applejack questioned.

"Well duh! How else are we supposed to know what being a squid is like?"

The squid king was listening to them. He said, "Okay, I've thought of perfect names for all of you! I've got: Squidity, Squidie Pie, Applesquid, Rainbow Squid, Squidlight, Fluttersquid, Squidcord, Squilestia, and... Um... Squoona."

"Eh, eight for nine," said Chad.

"I thought I did pretty good," said the king.

"How did you know our real names in the first place?" Rainbow Dash asked.

The squid king held out his smart phone and said, "It says it all right here in this Wikipedia article."

"Well, if its on the Internet, it must be true," said Chad.

Steve said, "Sir, we should consider the possibility that Sky and his friends may return."

"Wow, way to kill the moment Steve," said the king.

"Yeah, man, he just conquered this place and you have to be a dick about it," said Chad.

"I was just..."

"No. You shut up!" The king interrupted. "I'm sick and tired of your excuses! Do you know how much time you just wasted? It was about thirty seconds. Thirty seconds of my life wasted! Do you know how many things I could have done in that time? You know what? I'm gonna go draw a picture of everything I could have done in those thirty seconds that you wasted. Thirty seconds of my life DOWN THE DRAIN!"

___________________________________________________

Sky and his group were considerably lucky that the road to Canterlot was a straight path. For little more than an hour they walked along side the road. Surprisingly, they came across no other travelers on the way. When they were about a mile away, the magnificent city came into view stretched out over the cliff face, Kuledud3 didn't need to tell them that they had found where they were looking for. Even from the distance they were at, they could see the squids patrolling the sky. There were only a few dozen flying squids that they could see, but there what they couldn't see was that every source of water in Canterlot was now filled with as many aquatic squids as they could hold.

"Well guys, it looks like its time to finish this little adventure," said Antvenom.

"We do dis!" Deadlox said.

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