The Desert Pony

by thesilentpony

Train? Can I eat it?

“ROAD!” A pony said running, kissing it and prancing around. I looked around, they were all happy to see a road, I didn’t understand it.

“You guys really love your roads.” The boss pony came over to me smiling.

“No we’re just happy to see it, and no one died thanks to you and you’re eating habits. I guess.”

“It’s no problem.”

“How about you come with me? I’m going to Ponyville to turn in my findings to my boss, if you do, I'll give you all the water you can drink.”

“Ponyville.” I thought for a moment. “Never heard of it.”

“Near the Everfree forest.” The pony in tan clothes said.

“Oh that place, I go there to hunt sometimes. I find some of the best meals there, sure I'll come with you.”

“Great, um but you’ll need to give the details to my boss, about Smokey Mountain.”

“Sure.”

“So, why do you live in dangerous place?” The pony in tan clothes asked.

“Dangerous?” He chuckled. “Why do you say it’s dangerous? You ponies have acted so weird since I met you. Anyway if we follow this road it should lead us to Everfree Forest rather quickly.”

“We’re not walking there.” Boss pony said and I looked at him confused.

“Well I don’t have wings.”

“The train?”

“What’s a train?” They stared at me like I was stupid or something. “Well what is it? Is it some kind of beast?” I looked at them unsure. “Can we, eat it?”

“It’s made of metal.” Boss pony said.

“The question stands.” I said eyeing him.

“No, you cannot eat it.” He said laughing lightly.

“Oh.” I said sadly. I looked down digging with my hoof, whatever a train was, it sounded good. I wanted to try it. They started walking and I followed boss pony for a while.

“We never asked your name.” I looked at the pony in tan clothes.

“Roma.”

“I’m Cord.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“I’m Haggle.” Boss pony said.

“That’s a cool name.” I stopped at the city limits and every pony stopped as well. “I’ve never been in a city really, or at least not for a long time. I don’t even remember what Canterlot looks like any more.”

“It’s fine,” Cord said. “Nothing will hurt you here.”

“Oh I know that, I’ve just never been good around such weirdly unnatural things. I keep thinking they will fall over or something.” I hesitated stepping onto stone. I pressed it and it seemed sturdy enough.

“We should probably get you some shoes.” I looked at my hooves and then at the rest of them. They were wearing metal things on the bottom of their hooves.

“Why?”

“Your hooves will chip if you don’t,” Haggle said. “It’s painful.”

“Wait then why do you put your cities on hard stone then?”

“We don’t, we made these roads.” Cord said.

“How do you do that?”

“Later.” Haggle said and I walked onto the stone, it was weird feeling rock so flat under my hooves. I followed them looking around amazed. This city was simply wonderful, I had never seen so many ponies and such weird things. I zipped around looking at every store window scaring pony with my sudden appearance.

“Roma!” Cord said and I appeared in front of him.

“Yes?”

“Stop doing that, you’re scaring ponies.” I looked around and the ponies at the last shop were freaked out. “Also how do you move so fast? You’re not a unicorn. So you can’t possibly be teleporting.”

“Oh my armor, it enhances my abilities a thousand fold. Also I’ve never seen such things before.”

“Well calm down, we’re almost at the train station.” We went to the train station and I looked around seeing the weird tracks. I had come by them before, maybe the train was something that needed a road of some kind. They sure did love their roads.

“Here it comes.” I backed up hearing a rattle of something heavy. I looked down the tracks and Cord pulled me back. “Don’t do that, in fact don’t do anything.” I nodded and waited till a large metal thing came rolling down the tracks making me back up a little. It was odd, really odd I had never seen something like it before.

It slowed hissing at us and then blew hot air at me making me jump back, then forward kicking it rather hard, sending it flying though the air into a wall breaking through the wall easily.

“No one blows air at me monster!” I shouted at it and every pony backed away from me in fear.

“That was steam.” Cord said and I looked at him shocked seeing the train over fifty yards away on its side.

“Many monsters blow steam, I’m not about to let it spit scolding water on me.”

“It is a steam engine, it’s not alive and it isn’t a creature or monster, ponies made it out of metal.”

“Now you’re just making things up.”

“Can you please put it back onto the tracks. It can’t move otherwise.”

“I knew it, it does need a special road to move.”

“Please.” I sighed and ran over to it going to the other side and kicking it perfectly, sending it flipping through the air and landing on the tracks rocking back and forth making me jump, stopping it from falling over on its side. I went back over to Cord and he looked at me a little scared.

“Happy?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“Um you need to come with us miss.” I turned to see two ponies in carbon armor with guns on arms on their sides. I had once fought ponies like them, plus a large blue dragon which tasted like the dead. They were responsible for killing a lot of my food from some kind of weird explosion years ago which I was young.

“Wait guys it was a misunderstanding.” Haggle said.

“She pretty well almost destroyed the train.” One of them said.

“What are you talking about that thing hissed at me.” They looked at me weird. “If anything I don’t know why you allow such monsters in your cities, you ponies confuse me to no end, I swear.”

“Is she alright in the head?” One of them asked.

“Listen it was an accident, this is the first time near a train,” Cord said. “And you really don’t want an earth pony that was just able to kick a train to be mad at you.” They looked at me for a few seconds.

“It doesn’t matter we will have to detain her till we can find out the cost of the damage and then have her pay for it.”

“Why would you repair a monster?”

“Does she even have gold? Or is some pony else going to have to pay for the repairs?” I looked at them confused.

“Why would I have gold? I don’t understand.”

“Listen we can repair it ourselves,” Haggle said. “Six members of my team are train operators and repairers. In fact they are already fixing it now with their magic.” I looked over at the train as ponies started to heal it.

“You must really love the beast to heal it like that.”

“IT’S A MACHINE!” Cord shouted at me and I frown stomping the ground making it shake.

“Don’t you dare raise your voice to me, little pony,” I growled and he backed away in fear of me. “If you ever do that again and I'll rip you to pieces.”

“Okay, okay.”

“Trains ready!” A pony shouted. I turned growling at the train making Cord go in front of me.

“Please don’t attack the train again, it’s nice we ride on its back.” I snorted. Whatever this train was I didn’t like it. “Come on, nice and calm, come onto it’s back with me.” Cord said leading me into a hallowed out back.

“Wow.” I said looking around. “How is it that I took off the head and it is still alive? And how did you capture it?”

“We made it and that is the engine, it moves all the carts with it by hooks, so it’s not really connected to the front.”

“I still don’t like it, but you have made the inside look very nice. No wonder you love riding on its back.”

“Yeah, um sir do you mind if I get her cleaned up?”

“No go ahead.” Haggle said. Cord pulled me along as we went to the back and to a rather weird stone room.

“This is a shower,” Cord said pressing a switch, clear water came out surprising me and backing up at the heat. “It cleans you.”

“You clean yourself in its, its piss?” I asked looking at him and he paused. “Wait is that what that water was?” He slapped himself in the face laughing a little.

“No this is water like any other, we have pipes made of metal to transport hot water so we can take showers and baths.”

“Don’t you just use rivers or something?”

“No, for goodness sake, get undressed.” He started getting undressed and I blushed.

“Why do you want me to get undressed?”

“Oh Princess Celestia help me.”

“Who?” He chuckled.

“Of course you wouldn’t know who that is, who in their right mind would think that you would know who raises the sun every morning.”

“Raises the sun, right, I'll believe that when I see it.”

“Get undressed.” I sighed.

“Fine, but if you do anything weird.” I pushed him to the floor pinning him to the ground a little hard. “I'll eat you.” He swallowed.

“I promise I won’t touch you in any bad way, please.” I sighed and got undressed. He stared at my dark green mane and coat. “You don’t have a cutie mark.” I looked at him. “How old are you?”

“I don’t know.”

“You’re a mare not a filly, so you would be around what fifteen?”

“I guess, why would that matter?”

“Well just wondering.” He went to pick up my armor and tried, but stopped. “How heavy is your armor?”

“A few hundred pounds, why were you trying to pick it up?”

“You are crazy and I’m insane.” He went through about twenty minutes of talking, of how being clean was a smart thing to do. I never got sick, but apparently others could, and it was just pleasant to do it. I cleaned my armor and he had my cloth washed before pushing me into the shower.

“What now?” He closed the door and turned on the hot water.

“Don’t buck!” He ordered and I didn’t as hot water hit me making me whimper. He seemed to like the heat, and after a few minutes it felt nice. I had never had a hot water bath before, and this was really nice, burned sure, but good.

“Wow.” I said and I paused as he started to wash my coat making me shake a little as he really cleaned me. I pushed him back as he nearly reached somewhere he shouldn’t. “Where do you think those hooves are going?” I asked pushing him against the wall.

“Even without your armor your frightening strong.”

“I asked you a question.”

“I need to clean everything.” I blushed. “Everywhere.” I stepped back. “Please it needs to be done.” I swallowed.

“You ponies are weird, most of you wear nothing, you have no shame, but, I suppose if I must to, to.”

“Please, you’ll like how you smell. Without your armor you stink. I mean you do keep your coat nice and all, but you really need to wash more.”

“Fine, but, you, have to be gentile. I fell onto some sharp rocks not long ago, and my belly is still in pain.”

“I will be as gentile as possible.” I closed my eyes and his hoof was warmer than I thought it would, feeling rather nice. I had never let anything touch me before, but he had a way that made me feel rather odd. He stopped after a while.

“Why did you stop?” I asked looking at him.

“You’re clean.” I paused.

“Oh, I suppose some more cleaning wouldn’t hurt.”

“You’ve never, mated before have you?” I looked away.

“No.”

“Well you’re still young, it’s not odd for you not to. Anyway we’re done.” We got out and he dried us off with a towel. I got dressed back into my now shiny armor putting on clean dry cloth. “Feels nice.” I looked at him.

“Yes, I does.” I blushed a little. “I’m just not used to it, though I can’t say I will get used to it, wasting water like that is beyond me.”

“Being clean is never beyond any pony, you should do it more often. I think you’ll enjoy the freshness.”

“Maybe I will.” I smiled hiding it behind my scarf. Maybe ponies were more than just the last choice of a long list of meals. I followed him to Haggle and he looked up from a paper of some kind.

“Ah you both look better.”

“She’s presentable. Looks a lot better without her armor on, but I don’t think we could get her to walk around without it.”

“That’s fine, now Roma come here.” I went around sitting next to him. The comfort of these ponies was unheard of to me. I looked at a map of Smokey Mountain. “Now I know you probably don’t want to go into detail, but will you outline on this map all the deposits of materials?”

“Sure.” He handed me a quill and I started writing details about the mountain explaining the dangerous areas, and other things which would cause them to lose life or limb. He smiled once I finished.

“Well my employer will love these maps, though I can imagine he won’t be happy that a lot of this is protected by dragons and other creatures.” I yawned. “Have you slept lately? I don’t know if I saw you sleep at all, the whole trip back.”

“I sleep once a full moon, I can’t afford more sleep than that.”

“Well no pony will hurt you here.”

“Oh I have no fear that you could even scratch me, even in my slumber, but I simply don’t go to sleep, but once a full moon. It’s in four days.”

“You seem tired.”

“Yes I do get tired from time to time, especially when it’s hot, that shower water was quite warm so I’m a little tired. I'll be fine for a while though.”

“That’s good, also food.” I turned to a pony pulling a cart. She smiled as she set plates of weird things on the table. I looked at her.

“Don’t mind if I do.” I got up and Cord pushed me down.

“Not her!” He scolded me and her eyes went wide realizing what he meant.

“I'll be on my way.” She hurried to another thing of the train’s back.

“What?” I asked looking at him.

“No eating ponies! This is food.” He pointed at the things on the plates. “We have sweets, and other things that are good for you, grass root, cooked carrots, celery, apples, then some apple cider and other drinks. Here eat.” He gave me a carrot and I took it eyeing him as if he was joking.

“Your joking, I’ve never seen this weird stuff before in my life, you expect me to believe that you’re telling me that this is food, and eating ponies is wrong?”

“Yes.”

“You ponies are so weird.”

“Have you met anyone else besides us?” I paused.

“No.”

“Then what can that make you assume?”

“You have no sense of taste.” He chuckled.

“Try it please. We can get more if you like it, or, I’m sure we can find you something with meat if we must. Fish or something.”

“Oh I love fish.” He looked around at other ponies unsteady. He shoved the carrot into my mouth and I studied the taste. It wasn’t, bad but it was no scorpion beetle. That was for sure, and it was cold, which was odd.

“How do you like it?”

“I could survive on these I guess, but I can barely stand the taste, how do you eat these and stay alive?” He sighed and had me try everything. I could even swallow what he called a cake, it was crazy too sweet and sickening.

“You know I could do this all day just to see you queasy.” Cord said and I sneered at him making him chuckle.

“Bring me fish, I can’t stand your food.”

“I'll go speak to the chef.” I sighed as he left, and I looked out the window. I paused realizing that we were moving! And fast, I looked around and I hadn’t noticed.

“We’re moving.” I looked at Haggle and he looked out the window.

“Yeah, you didn’t know?”

“No, I thought that it would be rough, but I don’t know now. How is it that it moves without legs?”

“The wheels.” I opened the window looking out feeling the wind blowing on my face, smells brushing my nose, and the feeling of fresh air going into my lungs made me smile. A tug made me come back inside.

“Can you believe how fast this beast goes?”

“Yeah, pretty fast, anyway, I need a few more details.” He closed the window.

“What?”

“Do you know of any other mining sites, maybe safer?”

“Well there are tons of other places which are much easier to get to, if that’s what you mean.” He pulled out a map and I marked areas, in the badlands, Haysead Swamps, a few places on mountains, a ton of places in the crystal mountains.

“Whoa, you really have a knack for finding ore.”

“What, oh no, I only find it because I am on a hunting trip, if I don’t balance out where I hunt then I wipe out local food and start to starve. I only did that once, now I move around enough that I never need to worry about it.” We talked a while longer.

“Here you go.” I looked at dead white fish and then at Cord.

“What is this?”

“Fish.” I looked at him confused. “It’s gutted and cooked.”

“Why would you mutilate a fish in such a way?” He sighed.

“This is a popular way to eat fish, the chef says it tastes good.” I eyed it touching it.

“I don’t like dead meat.”

“Try it, and then if you don’t like it you can tell the chef that.” I picked it up eating it, and the taste was wonderful! I couldn’t describe the flavor, but it was a hundred times better than living fish. Though I did like the way the living fish wiggled around in my belly.

“This is great!” Every pony around me was truly disgusted for some reason, and it was starting to make me mad. “I don’t know what’s wrong with you ponies, but I’m really getting pissed off by your weird looks!” I said to them sternly making them look away. “Can I get more of it?”

“I'll talk to the chef.” He went away and I sat quietly till a while later he came back sitting down and I looked up at a griffin.

“BIRDIE!” I shouted and his eyes went wide as he started to run.

“NOT AGAIN NOT AGAIN!” He squawked as I jumped on him flipping in front of him smiling showing my sharp teeth.

“Oh I wondered when I would find you again, with your high flying and tasty wings ready to be eaten.”

“ROMA!” Cord shouted and birdie backed away scared.

“Not you again, don’t eat me!”

“Stop, he’s the chef.” I went up to him.

“You made the delicious fish?” He nodded scared. I licked him across his face. “I love you then, the fish making birdie. I won’t eat you this time.” He tried to back away and I pinned him to the ground with my hoof. “I never let my pray go, you’re lucky you can make me something better to eat than you, or I would feast this day.” He swallowed scared. “And I really love birdie flavor.”

“You won’t eat me?” He asked scared.

“Nope.” I let him get up.

“You two know each other?” Haggle asked.

“I was passing over San Palomino Desert with a group several months ago, we were flying at the time tired, and then out of nowhere my group started to disappear. There wasn’t even a sound, and we were very high in the air so we thought nothing from the ground could be doing it. We were so wrong, she had been jumping into the air, snapping our necks and falling to the ground like she was playing fetch.”

“By Princess Celestia.” A pony said.

“I managed to escape her when she didn’t snap my neck on the way down. I got away while she was feasting on others, I couldn’t save them. Why would you bring a monster onto this train?” He looked at them.

“She knows a lot.” Haggle said chuckling nervously.

“Yes and birdie eluded me for almost six hours, had I not been nervous to enter the city I would have caught birdie.”

“My name is Max you.” I pinned him to the ground and licked his neck. Tears went down his face.

“Birdie is birdie, you have no name, you are my pet so you can make me delicious fish to eat. Or I will eat you.”

“Okay, okay I'll make you fish.”

“And if birdie escapes me I'll hunt birdie no matter where he goes, I know dragons which are faster than birdie in flying. You will not get away from me again birdie.”

“I-I won’t try.” I licked him and grinned.

“Good.” I rubbed my snout into his chest smelling him getting his scent. He was really tasty, other than dragon, bird was the greatest tasting creature I knew. It was hard to let him up, but he had made the wonderful fish, too much to pass up. If I could capture a creature like him and have him make me it, then I was golden.

“I-I have your fish.” I sat down and he put a stack of all kinds of fish in front of me, all shapes and styles, it wasn’t just cooked, it was diced, skewed and many other things.

“Birdie is my pet, you will feed me the fish.” I smiled toying with him. I loved playing with my food sometimes. He fed me the fish shaking a little bit. “Sit down next to me, you will be my pillow.” He sat down after he finished feeding me and I nuzzled him. “Oh and since you’ve been good.” I set a diamond into his claw and his eyes went wide. “You get a pretty cut clear gem.”

“It’s so big.” He said with a wispy voice looking at Cord and Haggle, both of their jaws dropped shocked.

“Where did you find that?” Haggle asked.

“The gem balls, I saved a few if I got hungry. The rarer ones taste best, that one I’m sure birdie will enjoy a lot, I do.”

“Thank you.” He said with a sad smile. I laid down on his lap and closed my eyes resting my head. He pet my back a little and I stretched at the good feeling.

“I thought you didn’t sleep till the full moon?” Haggle asked.

“I’m not asleep, I’m laying down, I may not have my eyes open, but that doesn’t mean I can’t smell, hear, feel and about twenty other senses. I can hunt in perfect dark, I don’t need my eyes to know you moved closer to me and have your hoof above my pocket.” He moved it back away from me.

“I just wanted to see what other gems you have.”

“I have a few other diamonds, the one birdie has is the smallest one on me.” I pulled out a clear gem the size of a heart in the shape of a fake heart. I put it away. “I only give these to my pets when they are good.” Unlike other gems clear ones were by far the rarest in the world, I knew they had great value, but I only learned that because they tasted the best.

“Okay.” Max said.

“Well it’ll take us a day or two to get to Ponyville.” Haggle said.

“Oh yeah, why are you having me come?”

“Well you know of a lot of deposits, and I think my boss will want you to help us go collect the deposits. Your strong and I’m sure you could help us a lot.” I sighed. “Plus I’m sure we can have fish for your new pet to cook. If you won’t accept gold we can get fish.” Max grunted a little.

“Did you think that I was simply going to let you go?” He looked down at me and I narrowed my eyes making him sweat a little.

“No.” I got up and he got up as I pushed him a little.

“Go make more fish or something, I need to go take out a rotted lung or two.” They stared at me. “You ponies are so weird, where is a privet place?” Cord got up and lead me to a toilet room and I went inside opening my front armor, then turning my hoof guard around pointing the knife down.

“Okay I got to know.” Cord opened the door. “If you were kidding.” He paused seeing me with a pointy end to my chest cutting a little. He closed the door. “Your serious.” He walked away and I blinked for a moment and chuckled a little.

I cut inside my stomach and pulled out a black shriveled lung and then pulled out a second lung looking at it, it had another few months left before I would have to throw it away. I had been cut, beaten, eaten and ripped into so many times I lost count as a filly. So I ended up replacing many parts, the more compatible the longer it would last. My armor healed me to such a degree that I could live without a heart for weeks if I had to.

I put it back inside and I coughed up a little bit of blood having three lungs left which would last me a year or two longer. My wound healed as my lung hooked up. I washed up using a sink and drinking a bit of water, before going back.

Comments

[Vibrant lies]

That is plain freaky! Yet so intresting...