Pharynx: I’d do anything for Thorax.

Thorax: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a healthy sleep schedule.

Pharynx: Absolutely not.

Earlier today, I was searching around my apartment, and I found an intriguing message that I thought I should share. If I remember correctly, I originally found it on one of those daily calendars, you know, the ones where you tear off a page everyday and they all have a fact or quote or something.

It goes like this:

"Remember, anything you have published, whether fifty copies or a million, maintains for eternity the potential to impact the mind of man."

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This thought-provoking quote was brought to my attention this last Sunday at one of the LDS General Conference sessions, where it was quoted from a 2016 New York Times article on "Shame Culture." I'm sharing it because of its insightful look into why the current "shaming" trend doesn't work, and isn't a basis for a stable society.

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Yesterdays Answer: Mystic Knights

The key eludes me!

100 years later

The key ELUDES me!

300 years later

The key...ELUUUUUDES me!!

Excuse me? Tch! are you lookin' at me? Did you rub my lamp? Did you wake me up? Did you bring me here and now all of the sudden you're walkin' out on me?!? I don't think so, not right now! You're getting your wishes SO SIT DOWN!!!

So then what is an enemy? Is there such a thing as an absolute timeless enemy? There is no such thing and never has been. - The Boss

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Oh I forgot to tell you. I QUIT!! I resign! If it's perfectly in your ear, I am PRFOUNDLY outta here! And this isn't about money, I ain't even complaining about my dry cleaning bill but hang around with elephants all day and try to keep your clothes clean!

*crowd laughs*

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These are your...

Children.

These are your children?

Yes.

And you're?

Peter-!

You're Peter?

Yes.

You're Peter?

Yes.

No!

Yes.

You're peter?!?

Yes. Is there an echo in here?

"Bless me father for I have-"

"Sinned yes, I know! You're very good at that!"

Hint: This was a thanksgiving episode

Begone pests and give me the bird!

We'd love to really but the fox censors won't allow it.

I've already missed tea mister Albatross. Now don't force me to take drastic measures, you must relax.

Relax? I have never been more relaxed in my life! IF I WERE ANY MORE RELAXED I'D BE DEAD!!!

....I'm not convinced.

La la la la la la sing a happy song!

La la la la la la...this is so wrong!

You'll go as a wallet, you'll go as a belt and our dear Frank-.

No no no! I don't wanna hear it!

FRANK WILL GO AS~!

I can't hear you! La la Matilda! *sings in jibberish before removing his hands*

Ahoy-hoy, everypony!

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Silverstream: I desire moisture.

Ocellus: Why can’t you say “I want water” like a normal person?

I never wanted to smooch that dragon again! "smooch"? why would-!

*WHACK!!*

SEE! See that dragon again!

If your teeth come down, my sword goes up right into your brain!!

If your sword goes up, my teeth come down!!

(Later that night)

*removes a boney hand from between the teeth* oh good lord! Sir Eglamore...

I also plan to squeeze this in with my Warcraft fic.

Wallflower: When I was twelve I got banned from yahoo answers and when I emailed support to be like “what did I do?” I got a really vague answer that just said “you know what you did” and it still haunts me to this day.

“I'm a Catholic whore, currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black Jewish boyfriend who works at a military abortion clinic. So hail Satan, and have a lovely afternoon, madam.” - Harry Hart, Kingsman

Since it's all public knowledge anyway, I might as well save you the trouble of searching for skeletons in my closet.

*showers you with skeletons

You aren't going to hurt Bad Dragon's feelings by lashing out at him. To hurt him, you'd probably have to kill his mother....that guy's skin is thicker than lead.

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