Zenex looked around, pointing the pistol every which way. He sighed and continued walking, passing by a few cages. One of the prisoners tried grab him, but Zen’s pistol put a bullet through his skull. “S-Shit...” Zenex muttered. He didn’t even bother with clean language.

He continued to walk until he found something. It was a suit or armor. Zenex blinked. He took the suit and slipped into it. Perfect fit.

“W-Woah...”

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Zenex awoke a few hours later. He looked around feeling the stone ground at his hooves. “Ugh...” he groaned, standing up. He wobbled a bit. “E-Eclipse! Where are you buddy?!”

He continued to walk until he found what appeared to be a box. Out of curiosity, he opened it. Inside was...

A thing.

Zenex had read about weapons like these in a book about the human world. What was this 'L' shaped weapon called again? Piston? Pisto?

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Zenex smiled at Eclipse. The tiny kitten was curled up, sleeping. He chuckled and looked at his book. As he read, a group of nymphs ran in a snatched the kitten away.

“H-Hey! Get back here!” Zenex ran after them. He followed them to the nursery, where they’d drawn a circle with a star in the middle. Also in the middle, was a certain snow white kitten with blue and yellow eyes. “Hey! Let him go!”

The nymphs looked over. “What? Are you gonna tell Hivey—”

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Zenex:

Pharynx, Mitchell, Hive, and Zenex over look a large building.

Pharynx looked at the others. “Okay, so, that’s where the Blade soldiers are?”

Zenex nodded. “Mhm. And there are a lot of them,” he informed as they moved up towards the building.

“Okay, so how do we handle this?” Mitchell asked as they stopped at the door.

Zenex smirked a bit. “Leave it to me.” With that, he trotted inside.

Hive blinked. “How is he gonna—”

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...how would you guys react to a more Doom Slayer/B.J. Blazkowicz aka, a first person shooter where the main character is basically unkillable, is able to use just about every weapon, and is hella more violent, style Zenex?

Basically, how would you react if Zenex could/would do this?:

Or this?:

Pharynx looked at his soldier, who was holding a crossbow. “Okay, now aim down the sights.”

The changeling did so, aiming at a training dummy.

“Good. Now, turn the safety off.”

The changeling did that.

“Good, good. Now... shoot the dummy.”

The changeling fired, but missed.

Pharynx sighed. “The dummy.”

He fired again, but missed. He began unloading the entire magazine, missing each shot until...

“I said shoot the—”

Stab!

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I’ll be at Fang Gang Short #100...

Holy shite...

Zenex looked at his sidehoof crossbows. As he cleaned it, a changeling walked over. “Hey, you!”

Zen looked over. “Hm?”

“You’re that doll-eyed nymph that purple miss pigtails hangs with!”

“Um... yes...?” Zenex said, trying not to run away to Hive.

The female changeling glared. “That nymph beat the hell outta me!”

Zenex blinked. “Um... if she did, then you probably deserved it.”

The changeling growled, then a sheet of paper fell from her bags. Zenex examined them.

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Broken ran up to Dagger, who was throwing out empty boxes. “Hey Dag?”

“Hm?” Dagger put one of the boxes down.

“I need help.”

“With what?”

Broken blushed. “Well, I wanna surprise Rose with something, but I don’t know what to give her.”

“Hm... I have an idea.” Dagger picked a box. “Just follow these steps, one: cut a hole in a box, two, put ya junk in that box, three, make her open the box, and that’s the way you do it, it’s my dick in a box!”

“Dagger... you are messed up...”

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Broken looked at Dagger, then at his playing card. “Okay, so your task is to blow a job interview in like the first thirty seconds, how do you do it?”

Dagger thought for a bit, then asked, “how strict is the sexual harassment policy?”

Broken blinked. “Hol’up.”

Zenex looked at Hive. “Hey Hivey?”

Hive looked over from his book. “Yes?”

“Well, do you ever imagine that there’s some kinda...” Zenex thought for a bit. “Alternate universe where we all die as outlaws?”

Hive thought for a bit. “Mm... nope.” He went back to his book.

The Fangs in this universe hadn’t stopped being outlaws, and by now, they had bounties on their head.

Unfortunately, after a failed bank robbery, Mantis had been captured. After weeks of torture and interrogation, he was hanged.

Then, they tried hiding in the Frozen North, but Dagger and Stinger passed away.

Now, they’re in a Canterlot bank. They were surrounded. Broken looked out of a window, holding a revolver crossbow. “Come on, let us go!”

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Young Blue sighed, looking at the flowers grasped in his hooves. “Stupid guard... stupid flowers... stupid me...”

“'Not stupid me', you mean.”

Blue’s ears perked up and he turned around. “Ah! P-Princess Kydra!” He immediately bowed.

Kydra giggled and sat down beside him. “Oh, enough with the princess stuff.”

Blue’s eyes widened. “But won’t Chrysalis get mad?”

“Mm-mm.” Kydra smiled and looked at the flowers. Blue blushed and she giggled. “Aww, for me?”

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I’m fresh out.

*Zenex snuck into an alleyway in Ponyville. He looked around. It was the dead of night. He stepped into a hidden trap door in a building*

“Master Pie?”

*Looks at him* “Hehe! Come forth, Apprentice Zenex.”

*Steps forward and bows* “I have perfected the Art of Randomness.”

*Smirks* Good. Now...” *reaches for something* “It’s time to par-tay!”

*Smiles* “Yay!”

Stinger walked down the road, muttering to himself. “I can’t believe it... they just don’t understand...” he looked around. Then, he passed by a house with an open window. He didn’t think too much of it until...

“Heh, nice job,” a male voice chuckled.

“Thanks. I swindled that bucker like a con-pony,” a familiar sounding female voice said.

Stinger blinked and peered in. His eyes widened.

Silver was sitting on a bed, holding bits and checks, and a stallion was right beside her.

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Stinger and Hive walked down a hall. Stinger looked over. “I think... I think I’m gonna propose to her...” he muttered.

Hive looked over with wide eyes.

“I uh... I bought a ring.”

Hive blinked. “Sting... I need to talk to you about Silver...” Stinger looked over and Hive sighed. “I... I don’t like her.”

“W-What? Why?”

“I just... she’s hitting and robbing you!” Hive looked down. “Your moral compass is pointing in the right direction but your brain isn’t.”

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Blue, Dagger, Mantis, and Stinger walked off of the stage or their next show.

“That was awesome!” Dagger chirped.

Stinger nodded. “I know!” He smiled and looked over to see Silver looking over. He smiled and ran over. “Hey Silver! The show was amazing! Did you—”

“Yeah, yeah, where’s the check?” she asked.

“Oh... here it is.” He held his cut out. “I was thinking we could split it even—”

She snatched it. “Thaaank you.”

“B-But...”

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Mitchell laid one bed, looking at Midnight’s picture, a small tear left his eye. He set the picture down and wiping his eyes. Then, he heard hoofsteps. “Go away, I’m mourning...”

“Heh, sorry Nighty, I didn’t mean to make you.”

Mitchell immediately shot up. “M-Midnight?!”

The pink changeling walked over. “Heh, hey Nighty.”

“M-Mid... b-but I thought...”

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