First I wanna say that I'm totally not ripping off this awesome idea from anywhere else I may or may not have seen it.

Anyways, this activity is called "Trivial Epics," and it's just what it says on the tin: we write trivial epics! Take the most trivial of tasks, which will be supplied by the poster above you, and create an inappropriately epic narration! Once you're done, post another trivial task for the next dude to make epic.

This activity is designed to help you... write epically. To stretch your narrative muscles. Just don't go out and actually write like this about trivial things. It's fun, but nobody wants a whole page on opening a door.

I'll get us started.

"Colgate brushes her teeth."

Colgate entered her bathroom, mouth set into a grim line. Eyes narrowed, she bared her teeth before that mighty servant of hers, the mirror, which had aided her so readily in the past. What she saw made her hooves tremble with terror.

There, yea, there upon her noble chompers was the fiend. A disgrace upon the world, undeserving of even the trivial significance bestowed upon it by her gaze. A dull green blemish upon her tooh; a great taint upon Equestria. Colgate refused to tolerate its existence, as she had refused to tolerate every of its degenerate ilk before it. No measly morsel of food would mar her teeth. No such spawn of Discord would ruin the perfection, the paradise that was her mouth. And so, she vowed destruction upon the beast.

Reaching out to grasp her beautiful and storied weapon, that most immaculate of brushes, designed by her own careful hooves during The First Great Purge for the very purpose of removing such filth with righteous fury, she steeled herself. No mistake could be allowed. Neigh, she dared not allow herself to falter, her hoof to slip, lest she be lost, cast out onto the unenlightened masses where she'd seen so many fall in campaigns past.

With the grim determination of an experienced warrior, Colgate raised the brush to her pearly whites. Her breathing slowed. Focus reined. She must be quick, like the vicious snake which strikes out at its foe with heart-stopping speed, and yet, also, she must be precise, as the panther which pounces, with its very life hanging in the balance, upon its prey. She felt her heart flutter. Even after all these years, some part of her wished to hold back.

But neigh! In one swift and measured movement, Colgate brought her toothbrush down upon the fiend, wiping its stain off the plate of existence. Without mercy, she dangled the brush beneath her sink. The beast did not cry out for mercy, but if it had it would not have received any at her seasoned hooves. Her horn glowed, and the water ran. She watched with silent condemnation as its being was washed away, and subjected to the cruel whims of oblivion.

Next up! "Twilight turns the page."

It was a tragic occurrence, really. Much like the ending of an empire, or the defeating of an army. Many ponies just didn't understand the weightiness of having a page end. Twilight frowned as she was once again confronted with this scenario. She briefly considered pausing respectfully for the end of this page, but another force compelled her.
The story.
For much like time marched on, ignorant of the rise and fall of tyrants, kingdoms, and cities, the story marched on, indiscriminately ending the usefulness of pages long and short. Twilight knew that each page's sacrifice would not be in vain, as long as the story was told. Therefore, with but little thought for the action she was about to take, she tapped into her magic and lit her horn. The corner of the defeated page began to glow with a purple light, and with barely a nod of her head, she turned the page, flipping over an entire sheet's worth of letters as if it were nothing. She began the new page, and knew that it was only a matter of time before this page would be turned as well.
For, all in all, are we not but pages as well? Pages, worthless sheets of paper with an arbitrary combination of but twenty six symbols served as the perfect metaphor for ponies everywhere, living their lives in peace and happiness only to be cast aside, turned, and ignored in favor of the story.
The story marches on.

Pinkie Pie frosts a cupcake.

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There Twilight sat, staring in full focus on the book before her. Her breathing grew shallow. A bead of sweat trickled down her cheek taunting her with thoughts of being unable to finish reading. But no, she must finish, and it must be now; the story was nearly to its end!

The ticking of the clock beside her yearned to be heard. The clock itself outright demanded to be seen. Twilight resisted temptation; she dare not gaze upon it for fear of the late hour it would undoubtedly proclaim. Soon sleep would overtake her and thwart her every effort to reach the last page. But she fought, she fought her drooping eyelids, she fought ever present tick-tock of the clock.

Finally, as her eyelids grew so heavy and her eyes felt drained of all liquid, she could see the her goal; the end of the page! All she needed to do was wade through the text-laden paper and she would be done.

Her hoof graced the lining of the book as it made its way in preparation. It would not be long now; she could practically count down the number of words as she read. Forty... Thirty... Twenty... Ten... She was so close now! With a strained gulp and a long blink of her eyelids she counted down the final words. Finally her hoof could do its job and turn the page to end the story!

A relieved sigh escaped her throat. With only a short paragraph left, she was done. 'The End.' As the book gently closed, she lay her head down and let sleep finally take over.

That was fun. Next, Pinkie ties her shoes!

1442203 Sweat trickled down pinkies face. Her gaze never shifted off the baked good as her hooves adjusted the frosting filled bag over her right shoulder. Hesitantly, she brought the tip to the edge of the cupcake. Pulling her hooves together, she ever so slightly squeezed the bag. Her eyes located the sugar delicacy spilling out, and moved the tip around the sides of the cupcake. Her breaths where shallow, her hooves where shaking, her heart was beating out of her chest. The snow white frosting found its way back to where it started, but made its way around the ball of sugar. Now completed with one loop, the party pony was one step closer to handing the treat to her best friend Rainbow Dash. The corners of her mouth lifted as the bag swirled around, halfway done with the second circle. Squeezing more, the bag twirled and began another loop. bringing her hooves around once more, she aimed the frosting right into the middle. Once the tip was in place, she brought her gaze down, till her eyes and the bottom of the bag met. Aiming left, she pulled it up, leaving a perfectly frosted cupcake. Pinkie was about to cheer in joy, until her gaze looked at what was left of the cupcake. A bowl of sprinkles.

up next,
Applejack bucks a tree!

Before her stood her enemy; silent, still, its menace seeping through the ground, to be felt by Applejack's hooves as she faced it down. Her face set in a scowl, she slowly approached the tree, each hoofstep thudding as if a million hammers were falling, each step closing the gap between her and her mortal enemy.

As she surveyed the battleground, looking for terrain details that might improve her already slim chances, she noticed a small patch of planate ground, smooth and ready for her assault. Looking into the branches of the mighty hellion before her, Applejack could sense that it was likewise searching for advantages it might have against her, preparing itself for an attack that could lay her low.

Arriving at her destination, that patch of earth that was a perfect combination of smooth and level, she grimly planted her hooves, determination written upon her features as she prepared to take down the filthy miscreation once and for all. Slowly, inexorably, she turned, sweat trickling past her cheek as she tensed her muscles for what could be the last act of her yet young life.

Raising her hooves, she straightened them suddenly against the tree, fueling her buck with the magic imbued in her hooves, and with a thunderous crack, hit the tree with such force, as each and every piece of delectable fruit upon its boughs alighting in the baskets set round about.

Applejack wishes every day was this epic!

Next: Spike eats a gem!

Spike had only one option: Eat the gem. For if he didn't destroy this dammed object, all of equestrian would fall. As he rose the gem to his mouth, he wishes that he never brought that gem from the mountain.
As he swallowed the gem, his eye sight got blurry and he fell to the ground. "I don't want to die" he said as he felt a knot in his throat. Then a letter from Celestia came from the emerald green fire. Spike picked up the letter:
Dear Spike,
That gem you have is just a normal gem. It won't destroy equestrian. Now stop trying to make meals excited.
"Aw man." said Spike as he tossed the letter aside. And in front of him was that same gem.

Next: Big Mac eats an apple .

"That's it," she thought. "That's the last cloud to do."

She could just kick it away like normally, but no. She wanted to do it the good way. The awesome way.

She has already performed many tricks, but they were all spectacular on their own. This, this could be beyond even her range. Can she do it? Can she make a mundane, everyday thing so awesome, the entire universe will shatter in tiny bits?! She has done it several times, and has gained incredible experience and technique.

She has straightened and moved her legs to prevent any injury that came with bad angle.
Then she gave the clare to the white thing. The thing made of water molecules. She started to concectrate...
If she were to succeed, nobody would ever again deny her awesomeness. If she were to fail, she would likely be injured for the rest of her life, denying her any further tricks.

One foreleg raised.... second foreleg raised... then she takes aim... WHAM! A huge thunderous crack.

So piercing, she made herself deaf for a while. So loud, it could be heard in Manehattan.
So awesome, everything stopped in awe. So mind-shattering, nearby fabric of the Universe went away in a poof, just like that.

"Yeah, that surely was awesome," she said, though she didn't hear herself saying that.

Next: Twilight goes sleeping

The light from the moon bursted into the serene calmness of twilights bedroom. It had been a hard days work, first she had to send mail to shining armor about important things cadence should know and running the library was a bust. Her day was over all great but over anything, she was tired. Before she climbed into her cocoon of warmth, she ate a small cookie and drank a glass of warm milk. She trudged up the stairs making sure not to wake up the baby dragon on the upper floor. She settled down into her nest and turned out the lights. Without warning, her eyes shut and she was fast asleep, dreaming about her next adventure with her friends.

Next: angel bunny is really upset

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"angel bunny is really upset" isnt really a trival task...

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Oh... Uh how about rarity sews a dress? Sorry I'm not good with that kind of thing

Rarity sewing a dress in anything but trivial...

Their faces were emotionless as they stared into the void. Soullessly they stood around the room in eternal imprisonment. They had paid the ultimate price and had to endure a fate worse than death. Sentient but empty they would wear their own souls around their bodies which had been deformed to mannequins. Trapped forever and unable to stop others from joining their ranks.

The next candidate already stood in the center of the Carousel Boutique. Caught in a state of rapture while she watched the demigoddess prepare the dress which would consume her soul. No pony could escape the ritual ring of puppets after the process had begun. Like dominoes each second fell into the next and counted down the end of this condemned filly. Unable to move at the pure divinity she was seeing. Her fate had been sealed.

Rarity worked on the materials that been given supernatural attributes at the cost of but a few hundred souls. Once she had broken open the earth to retrieve it’s most worthful innards. Now she knew how to do the same with kin. No price was too much to pay for beauty.

“Your alabaster soul will blend wonderfully with the rest of the ensemble.”

Rarity walked around the soul in question and stroked her hoof through the filly’s mane.

“Innocence produces such a wonderful color darling, I shall not waste it. I’m being quite generous in taking it actually. Fashion may be mortal, but beauty is divine. It would be a waste to not take it and deny the world true beauty.”

She went back to her sewing machine and continued to work on the dress. Two souls had already been weaved into the materials. The third should not go to waste. Rarity worked through the night to complete what would turn out to be nothing less than perfect. Just like all the other dresses in Rarity’s Boutique it would now adorn a soulless mannequin. All at the small cost of Ponyville’s cutest trio.

I kinda missed the assignment I think. At least it was fun!

Next: Fluttershy cuddles a bunny.

An alarming cough, from a small critter, caught Fluttershy's attention. She sprinted over to see a bunny barely a few weeks old huddled under a briar.
"Oh goodness, are you okay?" The bunny looked up at Fluttershy, and immediately reached out for her. She carefully picked him up, and cradled him in her arms. Fluttershy gently placed her hoof on the bunny's forehead, checking to see if he had a fever.
"Oh my, you're burning up!" Fluttershy looked around for any signs of the bunny's parents. She came to realize after looking around for a while that the baby rabbit had been abandoned.
"Don't worry little one, I'll nurse you back to health." She said, as she held the bunny close to her. She flew back to her cottage, still holding the small infant in her arms. When they arrived, she looked around for the warmest blanket she owned. When she found it, Fluttershy wrapped the cozy blanket around the bunny. With one arm still holding the baby rabbit, she went over to the kitchen to prepare him a warm bottle of carrot milk. When the bottle was ready , she went to go sit in her rocking chair. As Fluttershy began feeding the bunny his milk, she started humming a little melody. When she was just a little filly, her mother would always hum the same tune to her when she wasn't feeling well. It always made her feel better, and she knew that it would help the ailing hare too. The baby rabbit let out a loud burp after he was finished. Fluttershy giggled. She gave the bunny a quick kiss on the cheek, and began to cuddle him. It took only a few minutes for the snow white hare to fall asleep, and the last thing he heard before he dozed off was a soft whisper that made him smile,
"Sweet dreams, my little angel bunny."

Next: Trixie casts a spell

"I still can't get over the fact that you came to my library, Trixie." Twilight said. "Why did you want to borrow the Conditions that affect magical abilities, anyway?"

"Trixie has her reasons. Now, if you would be so kind and just leave the book on the table. Trixie shall then levitate the book to her vardo, where Trixie shall study it. After that, Trixie shall find it in her to return the book to your humble library."

"Well, you better not damage it." Twilight sighed, dropping the book on the table and then taking her leave.

Trixie charged her horn, launching out her channels and spreading them toward the book. Committing her inner flow toward her horn, she fueled and lengthened summoned channels with magical energies. As the channels connected with the book's cover, she proceeded to form focal points on it's surface. A bright aura illuminated around the book, as the kinetic shield enveloped it. She started converting magical flow into kinetic energy, while forcing it on the bottom side of the magical bubble she had formed. The book was heavy, so she had to use extra reserves of mana to overcharge her channels. Her body tensed as she increased her mental focus on the task at hoof.

She shook her head cutting of the channels and dimming her horn light. "Buck this shit!" She bowed down her head and picked up the book in her mouth.

Next: Celestia takes a bite of a banana

Bumping this, because its one of my favorite activities.
Read the OP and take a shot! The current activity is: Celestia takes a bite of a banana.

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Princess Celestia--Sol Invictus, Keeper of the heavens, and Solar Diarch of the Celestial throne--approached the fruit bowl with all the cunning and majesty of a lion stalking it's prey. She is the sun, and all that it's light touches is her domain--so too it was with the fruit. Ever so casually, the immortal sun goddess sized up the pack, searching for a weakness to exploit. Quick as a cobra and with the ferocity of a pack of timberwolves she struck! So quick was she that the fruit did not even react, seemingly oblivious to her prize! And what a prize it was, for in her golden magic Celestia now held a glorious banana, the color of the dawn and with the radiance of the sun itself, it was truly a prize fit for a Princess!

'Twas not to last, however, for its beauty was soon marred beyond recognition as it's seal was brutally torn asunder by the sun giver. Celestia's smile was turned into a wicked grin as she slowly brought the doomed fruit to meet her mouth, providing ample view of the teeth that would soon bring about the banana's demise. Millions of tiny banana cells raised their voices in utter terror as the merciless guillotine that was Celestia's jaw came crashing down. They begged for her mercy, begged that she stop this madness, but alas, 'twas already too late and Celestia paid them no heed. Their miniscule voices all came to an abrupt end as Celestia chewed, and but for that a crushing silence overtook the scene.

It was then that Luna, Keeper of the moon, guardian of the night, mistress of dreams, and Lunar Diarch of the Celestial throne, saw fit to interject, "Tia... what art thou doing? Should I call thy royal physicians?"

Glass shattered, stone shook, foals cried and even Discord shuddered within his stone prison at the epic volume of "Tia's" reply, "Neigh, sister, today we rejoice! For a glorious victory has been won! Today is the day equine has finally conquered the ever elusive banana!"

And it shall be recorded in the book of ages that there was only one word left to be said by the grand Mistress of the night: "What?"

Up next: Vinyl drops the bass!

The mist of fog machines belched out from the emitters into the darkened room of the nightclub. All had gone quiet in dread anticipation for the event of the night. The tension in the room was palpable as energy built up in the crowd while they inwardly begged for the main event.

Lips were bit.

Muscles tensed.

Sweat dropped from pony’s faces in anticipation.

Vinyl was feeling every bit of the pressure plummeting downward onto her shoulders as the chosen one for tonight’s entertainment. Yet she felt no anxiety. The energy was rising like a dam about to burst. It was being channeled into her soul. She lived for every moment of it. She needed it for her existence to mean something.

Her eyes were closed as she painted a picture in the canvas of her mind. These ponies were in for the show of the century. Vinyl always planned for it to be so. For music to be worthy of her attention it had to be perfect. Anything less would be disposed of like excrement from the bottom of a hoof. She wanted to bring out songs worthy of the goddess of house music that she was.

Vinyl slowly bobbed her head as beats conjured themselves into her reality. Every sound pierced its way into her world, becoming personified and pleading for release. They needed to prove themselves to her. It was their rite of passage. She was their judge, high on her throne, ready to decide their fate. The right notes and beats were flowing, lost in the chaos of unorganized sound, Vinyl was as their savior.

She visualized her audience ready to receive her gift. They were going to dance in a frenzied soiree until they had her consent to cease. They were going to be entranced in her spell that craftily infiltrated their core. The crowd was hers and she was going to captivate them.

The DJ’s eyes opened, symbolizing the advent of the night’s fury. Fire and passion leaked from her grinning visage while she walked from backstage and onto the platform that was to signal to the crowd that their goddess had arrived. Celestia raised the sun, Luna brought the moon, and Vinyl dropped the bass.

Lasers pierced the mists and sliced through the air. The opus began, yet the crowd wisely kept silent. Vinyl stepped onto her platform hidden behind the stage. She placed a hoof on her sunglasses and lowered them with the confidence to shatter eternity. Her head continued to bob in regular rhythms to the pulsing sound, preparing to deliver the punch. As the music escalated in intensity, so too did Vinyl Scratch rise to the beat. Her silhouette captured the light behind her, refusing to let it go.

The crowd echoed a diluted cheer. The notes came forth through them while Vinyl’s hooves moved over the records with the care and confidence of a longtime lover. She steadied her breathing, waiting for the precise moment when the energy she stored could find release.

The regular notes stopped. Beats increased in tempo. The crowd began to wind up like a spring trap.

“Begin!”

Boom!

Vinyl’s face instantly displayed an ear-to- ear smile at the vocal cue when she dropped the bass. All the energy was released as her worshipers exploded into mayhem. Waves like the ocean cascaded through the club to the music and glory that was Vinyl Scratch.

Up next: Dr. Whooves turns an hourglass.

As Dr. Hooves enetered his laboratory, he placed a hoof on his desk. He had been out all day with Derpy, doing the silliest of activities. The Doctor didn't want to be rude, but blowing bubbles was not his go-to idea of 'Fun'.

His idea of an enjoyable time was something more, sophisticated, something much more time-worthy. Something that only the finest of ponest could ever fined enjoyable. That, was the art of hourglassing. What is hourglassing?, many simple ponies may ask. Hourglassing was only the fine art of the hourglass arts.

Turning over a hourglass, the Doctor squealed. Yep, this was the life.

Up Next: Pinkie shows her friend's what happens when she's angry! :)

(who cares, im still going to post in this old thread )

Pinkie Pie was up in a FLASH! It was morning, and she was happier than usual. She had even woken up earlier than her usual time!: 4:30. Pinkie bounced happily over to her bathroom, thinking of all the GREAT things she could do with her friends today. As she finished brushing her teeth, Pinkie had the most absolute BEST idea ever. SHE COULD SCHEDULE A PARTY!
Pinkie bounced excitedly at the door of her friend's tree-house, knocking the door without end. Twilight's pet dragon, Spike, answered the door with a groggy face, looking up. Pinkie spewed words out of her mouth excitedly, "HEY-CAN-YOU-AND-TWILIGHT-COME-TO-THIS-SUPER-FUN-PARTY-AT-MY-HOUSE-TODAY-AT 6:00?!?!"
"Party? At 6:00? I don't know Pinkie. Me and Twilight have things planned today. Look, i'll ask Twilight. Come inside, i guess"
"Thanks, Spike!"
Pinkie bounced into the house, almost bumping her head on the doorway. She danced on the tips of her hooves as she waited for Spike and Twilight to come and tell her, yes!.
Moments later, Spike came down with an even MORE groggy Twilight. She didn't seem so happy, now that Pinkie thought of it.
"Pinkie... Spike told me that you invited me to a party...? Ah, i'm very sorry Pinkie. Spike and me have plans. Go have a party by yourself, for all i care."

"B-But... well, ok! I will just ask the rest of our friends!"
Pinkie trotted out of the house, her mane deflated. Twilight stared at her from the doorway, Pinkie not knowing how much she didn't mean it.

This happened with each of her friends, except with them not having a Spike (except for Fluttershy), and closing their doors in her face. At this point, Pinkie was for once angry. She walked around town, her mind flying with angry thoughts. they could have ATLEAST been nice about it! And i was looking forward to it so much! . Pinkie didn't cry. She had to show them, she wasn't just some party-giver.

As Pinkie went into an alley, she was no longer Pinkie. She was her alternate personality, Pinkamena. She had already determined her plan. She set out to her house, from the dark shortcut she had never used.

Pinkamena already knew the recipe. All was set.

Next Up: Twilight gets tired of filly fans. (you know the episode, right? )

and yes, its cupcakes. It just happened