Hi. I wrote a sad story this week. I'm not sure how well it turned out, and I'd love to get some feedback on it before I submit it to the site.

I'd really, really appreciate it if anyone would be willing to read it and comment on it! Here's the doc.

445457 Nice idea. Wouldn't read again, but 4.5/5 Pinkies.

Structurally sound, for the most part. A few typos, misused words. Good characterization. Kept me reading all the way through, which is rare.

Would have liked to feel more of Red Sky's sense of isolation, or alternatively, Shining Armor's grief at having to bear the burden alone. Showing, rather than telling, of course.

Has potential, just need to amp up the Sad.