3358718 How am I the heretic, eh?

3358736

Not enough fangs.

3358739 Humans have incisors, eh.

3358765

Hmmm...

Okay, I'll let it slide. Make sure to bite plenty of stuff with them, though.

3358777 Incisors are meant to grab onto the meat, and cut causing it your prey to bleed, eh.

Also, seeing how I'm a giant Human my incisors are huge, eh. My teeth are half your height, eh.

3358735 You are a heretic because you refuse to except the blessings of Father Nurgle and the holiness of the fang!

3358786 I am no heretic, because I serve The Emperor of Mankind!

3358798 I spent the first two centuries of my life in service to him, all we ever did was subjugate peaceful communities and exterminate aliens, and for what? A corrupt and dying Imperium that punishes it's citizens just as much as it's enemies. No more shall I serve the False Emperor, for without the light of Chaos, the universe would stagnate and collapse.

3358818 You're a heretic for turning away from The Emperor's Light!

3358829 My god is not a rotting slag of meat on a shiny throne, my god is the very essence of life and the very order of things.

On a thread related note, we need more bat ponies!!!!!!!!

3358858

--arcum42

3358873 Didn't your mother ever tell you it's rude to stare.

3358829

The light is heresy in this group! Besides, if you love the Emperor so much why did you kill his daughter?

3358858

I don't think I've done pinkie yet.

Pinkie is the most improved by batification IMHO.

That just leaves Twilight for the "Fang Five" as I like to call them.

3358858 YOU SPEAK OF HERESY YOU BLASPHEMER!

3359216 The light is not heresy! I did not kill his daughter, nor did I kill anyone, eh.

3359732

If the light isn't blasphemy then why does it burn the sensitive eyes of the poor bat ponies? Your light should be more considerate of the feelings of others.

3359740 Because bat ponies are heresy, eh. The light cares for all if they convert to be Human, IF that were to be possible, eh.

3359746

No, humans are heresy! You role around in the mud all day and build houses of mud and eat mud. Next to mud monsters and earth ponies that's about as filthy as you can get.

And let's not even get started on how dumb they are, 99% of humans can't read and 70% don't know any words with more than four syllables.

You should stick to farming and staring into the sun- the two things humans are good for.

3359764 You do know Humans are capable of more than doing just that, right?

Silly, disgusting xeno. *pets you head with my giant hand*

3359771

Moving this to here so it won't clutter up the fang thread.

3359798

3359216 I found bat Applejack, can I post?

3360959

You're allowed to post Applejack, see?

3361698 KK

3195431

3379430

And now to finish off our series, we have Twilight Sparkle the vampony Princess (AKA Batlight Sparkbat)

I know what you're thinking "But Flutterbat is one of the best bat ponies of all time!" Well let me ask you who created Flutterbat?

Who destroyed Flutterbat?

That's right. Twilight is the head vampony. Dracula, Lestat, Carmilla, Nosferatu... they ain't got nothing on Twilight.

3404564

That's right. Twilight is the head vampony. Dracula, Lestat, Carmilla, Nosferatu... they ain't got nothing on Twilight.

It all makes sense now.

All that power. Now the wings. The rage against the creature horning on her pony-consuming territory.

3404606

--arcum42

3404621
...Silver Spoon makes for an awesome vampire.

I wouldn't have guessed.

3404606

Then again, wasn't it Celestia who gave Twilight her wings?

Come to think of it, Celestia is immortal, hardly ever around and refers to everyone as "her" ponies. What if... Celestia is the head vampony?

I know what you're thinking: wouldn't a vampony not want to be around the sun so much? Well, what better reason is there to take control of the sun?

3404648
Pshaw. Twi totally won her wings legit, through satori.

But yes. Celestia is an ultra-intelligent chessmaster type. Taking control of the sun would be like her. Very crafty. Very much thinking outside the box, and even the chimney. And clearly she passes on her protection from it to her Faithful Student.

3404659

Little did anyone know that Celestia's school for gifted unicorns was actually a school for vamponies! Celestia wanted to ensure that all the most intelligent unicorns were within her coven, leaving the unwashed masses to be helplessly preyed upon by the ones they think are protecting them.

Yes, Celestia taught Twilight well. How to feed, how to survive sunlight, how to hide her true nature under a mask of benevolence, which ponies to pick off and which to turn.

3404688
Flutters was just the beginning.

She's definitely Celestia's prized charge. She clearly knows that nobody ever suspects the butterfly the Fluttershy. She was patient. And she chose wisely. She planned and set things up perfectly, when the chance presented itself with the Vampire Fruitbats (assuming it was even a coincidence!) And now nopony will even think twice if the untrained Fluttershy reveals herself. They'll just take her right back to Twilight to be fixed, without ever looking further.

Masterful.

...This would make a hilariously fun fic.

3404698

That would create a lot of interesting drama. Twilight always thought she would inherit Celestia's vast vampony kingdom, but now Celestia's begun grooming Fluttershy to take that role instead. Now Twilight is tasked with training Fluttershy- her own replacement. Fluttershy's vampire powers are beyond Twilight's, but she's inexperienced, leaving the two evenly matched for now. What does Twilight do now? Obey Celestia and be replaced? Or seize control for herself? And can anyone really control Fluttershy and her immense powers?

Do it Luminary! The world needs more vamponies.

3404734
Silly Epsy. Friendship is magic, vampire or not.

Twilight adores Celestia. But... would she turn against Fluttershy? Especially since there's nothing they wouldn't do for each other? And nothing can stop them when they're united?

3404771

That's... that's so beautiful!

I can see Twilight being worried about being replaced only to have Celestia come and assure her that Twilight could never be replaced in her heart. Every vampony is important and irreplaceable and Celestia loves all her little undead spawns equally.

3404784
And that's when Twilight and Fluttershy strike.

3404786

Oh no! There go my heartwarming feelings.

Cause of death was listed as "excessive cake". I'm sure the masses would buy that. And so begins the thousand year reign of friendship and terror.

"Thank you, Applejack, but I'm afraid I'll be needing all the apples."

Pshaw. 'Cause of death'.
As if Twilight could kill her role-model-slash-waifu-slash-creator.
She's just... changing the organization of the government a bit. Organization is Twilight's strong suit, after all.

3404808

You can't kill a vampony princess, Lumi. Twilight just releases a fake obituary to keep ponies from asking too many questions.

Celestia will be kept in a comfortable room in the castle of the two sisters where she will be used for... shall we say "entertainment".

3404815
This has suddenly become a very different fic.

...which is even more relevant to my interests.

3404816

Fun fact: Lesbianism is a side effect of being turned into a vampony. Dealing with her new sexuality is one of the first problems Twilight has to help Fluttershy with.

3404822
I suppose that explains why all female vampires are lesbians.

3405032

Well the most masculine vampire around these days is like, this guy:

So female vampires really don't have a lot of options, ya know. Half the time they don't even know they're dating another woman until it's too late.

3405050

Epsy...

3405073