Hi everypo--! *cough**hack* I mean, hello there my little ponies.

I'm sorry I haven't been around for awhile. For the last few weeks I've literally been swamped by all my new princess duties. You know, meeting with dignitaries, holding court for my fellow ponies, signing motions into law . . .

But Twilight, all you did was lock yourself in the Canterlot Archives and refuse to let anyone else in! Something about needing to read every book on Princess'ing ever written "before they could drag you onto the throne" . . .

Heh, heh, heh . . . SHUT UP, SPIKE! *ahem* What he means is that I've been diligently devoted to increasing my knowledge on all of the procedures, protocol, and customs of being a Princess of Equestria. After all, I only want to be the very best princess that I can be for my little ponies; so what if I took a little time away from everything to make sure that I am absolutely, positively, unquestionably ready to have absolute dominion over all that I see? Heh, heh . . .

. . . and when they finally broke the doors down, you had turned the entire archives into a full-scale, fully-functional Book Fort! I mean, with bastions and parapets and ravelins around the central stockade . . . it even had working cannons! How'd you even manage that?! Working cannons . . . made from books?!

SPIKE!! Hush!!

A-a-anyway, please feel free to ask me whatever questions you might have. And I can assure you that your questions will be answered promptly, thoroughly, and without any interruptions.
. . .
. . .
. . .
I promise nothing.

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2203048 Should I go make a taco? Sorry, I've got nothing better right now.

So you get used to the wings yet? you too spike.

2203048 How would you feel/react if Spike told you he was gay?

2203072
Um . . . if you want to, sure, I guess?

You might want to ask Rainbow Dash. She has more experience with tacos and knowing the best times for eating them than I do. Speaking of which . . . *walks off to read The Art of the Taco*

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2203048 How do you feel when people write things that force you into a relationship with somepony you're not attracted to?

2203048
If there are two trains heading to Canterlot, and one makes half as many stops but at 2/4 speed of the other, what day is it?

2203129
No offense to any pegasi out there, but UGH!! Why would anypony want these silly things?! They put me off balance when I'm walking, they catch on the littlest things, they make a mess when I moult, and they stick out and make uncomfortable all the time!! I can't even get them to work in tandem, much less make me fly straight!

*sigh* I guess it's not all bad though. Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and I have all gotten a lot closer as friends these last few months. They've been really helpful in teaching me the practicalities of proper wing maintenance, exercises to develop wing strength, and basic flight theory.. I had, of course, already read up on all of that, but it was nice of both of them to actually show me how to do all of those things firsthand.

As a matter of fact, I've gotten a lot of offers for help with my wings; preening, in particular. There's Fluttershy, Rainbow, Fluttershy and Rainbow, Rarity and Fluttershy and AJ and Pinkie and Rainbow, my Mother, Prin-, I mean, Celestia, Trixie, and even the mailmare Ditzy Doo! I guess I should be grateful to have so many wonderful ponies that want to give me a helping hoof, but . . . it can get a little uncomfortable sometimes.

Not sure what you're looking for from me, bro--I haven't grown any wings yet. Though, if I had them, I sure wouldn't be making so much of a fuss about them like Twilight. I mean, come on, they're just wings. You just, I don't know, use them. Like your legs and hooves (or claws). Or Twilight's teleport spell. They're just another thing that helps you get from A to B.

In any case, I hope that answers your question!

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2203131
*hmph*

First off, that's a very sensitive question to many ponies and shouldn't be thrown out so brazenly. After all, you could seriously hurt a friendship or even deeper relationship if you drop a question like that without first considering the impact it could have. I'm certainly not saying you shouldn't ask that, I'm just stressing you should be more careful when you do.

*removes glasses* That being said, in answer to your question, I would have absolutely no problem if Spike were to tell me he was into stallions or male dragons. I love my Number One Assistant with all my heart, and nothing he could ever say or do would ever make me feel otherwise.

Oh, Twilight . . .

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2203956 I meant no offense. I mean, I'm gay and had a less than perfect time telling my family about it, so I was just wondering. Thanks Twilight! :)

2203048 A book fort? Friendship is Witchcraft, anypony? But anyway, has Celestia ever trolled you?

2204017
No offense taken, my little pony!

And . . . I'm sorry too. I guess I got a little defensive for both Spike and myself because your question caught me off guard, but that's no excuse for reacting the way that I did, particularly when there was no just cause and you were simply asking a question that held personal meaning for you. I'm also very sorry that you had a difficult time with your own family when it came to being true to yourself. Love and Tolerance are great ideals, but I've learned these last few seasons that sometimes we don't always keep those words in our hearts, even towards the ponies we absolutely should.

Heh, I guess that even though my title says I'm the Princess of Friendship, there are still many things for me to learn. Thank you very much for that friendship lesson, BloodyLastWords!

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2203170
P-p-ponies are doing that?!?I

Though I suppose I . . . understand? After all, free speech is a fundamental right of all ponies here in Equestria, and as a Princess, and more importantly, as a Librarian it is my responsibility to not condemn anypony's words simply because I disagree with them.

Besides, it's not like I haven't tried my own hoof at that kind of writing every once and a while . . .

Just out of, um, curiosity . . . who have ponies written me as being . . . "involved" with? I'm only asking so that I can do . . . statistical analysis, I assure you.

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2203863
*removes book from shelf* Well, if we consult Jane's Equestrian Railways and Historical Scheduling Reports, it turns out that the only train line that meets those parameters is the Vanhoover line, due to the distance it has traverse across the Unicorn Range. When we compare its previous schedules to those of all of the other train lines across time, we find that the concurrence of two trains travelling to Canterlot at the specified comparative speeds only happens once every thirty moons, when the long arm of Sagittarius is eight days from reaching its cusp with Capricorn.

So, Tuesday.

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2203048 Now that you're a princess (and a princess of friendship, no less), do you think Celestia will be sending you on diplomatic missions with other species such as griffons, minotaurs, and dragons? I know that last one seems unlikely given your experience with full-grown and teenage dragons, but they earned the respect of the buffalo, so maybe there's something about them you ponies are missing.

2204233
Friendship is, what? Witchcraft? Huh?! I . . . I've never heard of anything so buY SOME APPLES ridiculous . . .

And, really? I could never believe that my dear mentor, Princess Celestia would ever . . . "troll" me. I mean, heh, sure she can be a little mischievous sometimes. And sometimes maybe she leaves out heh, heheh, a little critical, need-to-know information about potentially deadly situations. But that's okay! Really, heheh, heheheh really, it is! Because I know, in the bottom of my heart, that Princess Celestia is the kindest, wisest, most benevolent ruler and teacher that I could ask for! After all, she only has my best interests at heart, right? Sure, hehehehe she's been guiding me with a firm and hehe steady hoof since I was small, but it's not she was secretlymastermindingmydestinysinceIwasafillysothatIwouldmakefriendsbecometheBeareroftheElementofMagicandascend toanalicornprincessallinthespaceofafewseasonspassings!!! I mean, re-hehehehehehe-ally, who would believe something like that?!

Hey Twilight, what's the name of that river that runs through Egryph? You know, the run that basically helped found the ancient Egryphian civilization?

Whuh? What?! Spike, come on, you know this! It's The Nile!!

That's the one. Goodnight, everypony! I'll be here all week! *waddles off*
. . .
. . .
. . .
I really don't understand that dragon sometimes.

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2204862
That's a great question! And the answer is . . . Yes!!

Hehe . . . truthfully, I have been studying a great deal about diplomacy and the nuances of interspecies politics as part of my overall princess studies. *sigh* Sadly, a lot of it still doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. I'd prefer to just mingle with the various nobles and diplomats and just speak my mind, but most of the royal advisers Prin-, I mean Celestia, provided to help teach me say that's a big No-No. Something about potentially causing an international incident that could result in global war due to terms of multiple geopolitical alliances and pacts, or . . . something.

Still, one good thing about all this training is that I've actually gotten to spend a lot more time with Rarity.

Lucky.
Nopony likes a sourpuss, Spike.

Anyway, Rarity has always been a lot more knowledgeable than me about how to talk and interact with various ponies, and she generously offered to give me some pointers and practice various situations with me. She . . . can be a little scary sometimes, particularly when she really gets into playing whatever part she's created for me to react to, but true to her element, she's just as generous with her praise when I get something right as she is to critique me when I screw up *ahem* "Yet again, darling."

So between my own studies, lessons with the advisers and other Princesses, and practices with Rarity, I've actually gotten to the point where I've been formally been introduced to some of the other ambassadors! There were . . . one or two or five stumbles here and there, but at the end of the day they were all very nice and even said I was half-way impressive as a pony princess! A few more months, or years, or decades of diligent study and practice. and I'll actually be ready to say more than just "Good evening" as I greet everypony at the door!

As for the dragons, well . . .

Um, mind if I take this one, Twilight?

Aww . . . *magics Spike over* sure, my Number One Assistant! That's so helpful of you!

*blushes* Aw geez, Twi, com'on. Cut it out!

Hehe . . .

What I was going to say was, diplomatic missions to speak with dragons usually don't happen because there actually isn't any formal Dragon Nation. As a group, dragons are pretty nomadic, and typically keep to themselves except when it benefits them to group together to meet a common goal, like survival or *ugh* mating.

As a result, ponies usually have to deal with only a single dragon at a time, and traditional Equestrian diplomacy typically doesn't work because dragons tend to be more interested in meeting basic needs first and "pony matters" much, much later on. There's rumors about a Council of Elders that acts as sort of ruling body for the various dragon colonies and hoards, but even that is shrouded in more myth than anything else. Not even Princess Celestia has any clear information about it.

Spike! Spike! Tell them what she told you! Tell them what she told you!

Alright, alright, I was just getting to that, Twi. Yeesh.

Anyhoo, though it's been the status quo in Equestria to have relatively few dealings with dragons unless absolutely necessary, Princess Celestia doesn't feel like it should always be that way. So, the other day she . . . well, she asked me if I want to be the first official Equestrian Ambassador to Dragons when I grow up.

*squee* Eeeehehehehehehehehehehehe . . .

Twiiiiiiiiillllllliiiiiiight . . .

I can't help it! I'm just so, so proud of you, Spike!! *glomps Spike*

T-T-Twilight!! Not while everypony is watching! Let me go!!

NEVER!!

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2208763 Oh, hoho, Twilight. I do think you know what FiW is. I shall now grill you! What do you think of it? Do you think it's strange? Do you not like how you married Shining Armor in #8? TELL ME!

2210282
I, I, I . . . ahhh, th-that is . . . um, you see, ah, heheheh . . .

WAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! IT'S TRUE!! I admit it! I confess, so put away the soft cushions and comfy chair!! I love Friendship is Witchcraft! I can't stop watching it! I check my notifications every day to see if a new episode has come out. WHY WON'T THEY RELEASE ANY MORE EPISODES!!!

*takes multiple calming breaths* That's better . . . I'm actually a little ashamed to admit how much I like Friendship is Witchcraft. I . . . I don't know what the other girls, much less Celestia or Luna or oh, Faust CADENCE would do if they found out I actually enjoy that kind of sociopathic humor, particularly since it involves some really exaggerated parody characterizations of all of them. Spike . . . he wouldn't talk to me for three whole days after I showed it to him. Sure, he got over it after I apologized left and right, and bribed him by setting up a "date" with Rarity and providing a month's worth of gems, but . . . I don't want to take the chance of alienating anypony else. I . . . I don't think I could handle that.

Still . . . I really do admire how well the show reflects the girls and my adventures, if in a slanted and hilariously twisted way. I don't even mind the way the creators choose to portray me as a selfish, vain, diabolical mastermind who ruins everypony's lives around her in order to sate her own ego. I know that's not how I really am, so I can laugh at the outlandish, wrongness of everything that happens in this dark, funhouse-mirror version of Equestria. I also know I shouldn't like it or be enjoying what the characters say or do so much, but it's that feeling of . . . naughtiness that's part of what makes it so addictive.

Besides, Sweetie Bot is adorable, maybe even more so than the real Sweetie Belle.

Oh, dear . . . I hope Sweetie doesn't find out I said that. That poor filly has enough self-confidence issues as it is . . .
. . .
. . .
. . .
"SET PHASERS TO HUG!" eehehehe . . .

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2211362 Oh gosh, I hope they don't alicornify the FiW Twlight like they did you. The whole world would explode. You don't have to respond to this, I'm just finishing a thought. Thanks!

has a stallion ever tried to get you to be his special somepony and if so- what did you say?

2258390
Uhh . . . heh, heh, heh . . .

This is so embarrassing. Please, please don't tell any of the other girls, but I've . . . never, actually, been asked to be someone’s special somepony. Well, not by any stallions, anyway. There was this one colt I met when I was a filly attending Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. Bluebird, maybe? Bluebell?

Anyway, he was a really sweet foal from what I remember, but at the time I was still more interested in my books and studies than getting to know anypony, much less being a special somepony. I think I let him down gently? I honestly don’t remember things from back then too well—it’s all kind of a blur.

Maybe I should find out what happened to that colt . . . *walks out to find old yearbooks*
. . .
. . .
. . .
Is she gone? *phew* That’s good. Now I can burn all these marriage proposals those snooty, stuck-up Canterlot scumbags have been sending her.

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2286815 hey don't worry I got the same problem (of course I'm a guy so it really doesn't work that way), well the point is don't worry your secret is safe with me Twilight.

2289754
Thank you so much! I'm sure we'll both find special someponies someday. After all, I never thought I'd have such a great group of friends (or any at all, actually), and look how wrong I was!

*reads end of previous entry* SPIKE!!!

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

lol, alright see ya twi

2203048

Should I exterminate the Griffons?

Yours Truly,

The Supreme Dalek.

2491686
Ex-ex-exterminate?! But why would--? How could--? In what kind of--? Bwuht?!?!

H-how could you actually th-think of doing something like that?!?! I mean, yes, the Griffonian Empire and Equestria haven't seen eye-to-eye for a long time, but I'd never want to see any griffons hurt just because we don't get along, much less have them ex-exterminated! I wouldn't even wish that on Rainbow Dash's old friend Gilda, and she was a complete jerk! What kind of conscienceless monster are you?!

Well, as much as I appreciate your politeness, Mr. Supreme Dalek, at the same time I think somepony needs a major lesson in Love and Tolerance!! *fires magical alicorn beam*

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Head Librarian of Golden Oak Library, Former Bearer of the Element of Magic

2498607 Well, you defeated Lord Tirek, got a shiny new castle with new responsibilities, and finally befriended Discord, Master of Chaos. How do you feel, Your Highness?

3272252

My home . . . *sniff*

I'm not really sure how I feel at the moment. Now that all the adrenaline and excitement has worn off, I feel . . . lost? Scared? Confused? Maybe even a little . . . guilty?

Oh, please don't get me wrong! I'm glad everything worked out in the end. And I'm thrilled that my friends are going to be sitting with me at my side, rather than several rows below due to my having wings and a crown. Being tasked with spreading the Magic of Friendship throughout Equestria and the lands beyond is a tremendous calling that I am fully committed to fulfilling to my utmost of my ability!

And yet . . . I can't help but worry about what might be coming next. For me. For my friends. For all the ponies I care about. If Tirek was strong enough to suck up nearly all the magic in Equestria, blow up mountains (and my house *sniff*), and nearly destroy everything ponykind has built, then what about the next threat we have to face? And the next? And the one after that?!

And . . . is it my fault that this is going to continue happening? Because I questioned my role as a princess and asked, neigh, pleaded for a more substantial position, did I inadvertently open the proverbial (and literal!) Gates of Tartarus on Equestria, just to give me something more to do?!

I believe in Magic. I believe in Friendship. And I believe that as long as my friends are with me, there is nothing we can't accomplish together . . .

But will it always be enough?

S-Sorry. That got really heavy all of a sudden. After all, everything did work out. Tirek was defeated, Discord learned a valuable lesson and grew stronger as a friend, the other three princesses are back where they belong, and I have a whole new sparkly castle just waiting to be filled with books. So . . . everything is fine.

Everything is going to be . . . just fine.

~ Her Royal Highness, The Princess Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville, by the Grace of Faust Princess of Friendship, Ascended Spirit of the Element of Magic . . . and Former Head Librarian of the Golden Oak Library