Twenty Great Stories 61 members · 11 stories
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From Spacecommie:

Five Hundred Little Murders

Flitter doesn't like most ponies. There's hardly anything in the world Flitter likes, very few which she can even remotely tolerate, and only a couple which she truly loves. Fluttershy is not in the last two categories. Flitter sees Fluttershy as weak, and weakness disgusts her.

But when you're trying to help someone you love, you'll look for help in a lot of places -- including the cottage of the weakest pony in the world.

And for those willing to listen past their pain, it might be the place where they start to learn what true strength is.

It's a beautiful piece.

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Since I nominated this, here's my pitch for it.

I'm not really sure why this story is put together the way it is, and I would have done it differently. That's probably why this is so impressive. The protagonist is a nasty piece of work, isn't particularly fun to listen to, and by all rights should be entirely unsympathetic. Estee manages to make us--well, at least me--care about Flitter. It's not by any cheap tricks--no tragic backstory that explains her being such a misanthropic bitch. There's nothing in the way of an apology for her as the point of view, and there shouldn't be. But enough about me being in love with the way the author makes the POV work.

It's definitely sad, but it doesn't demand your sympathy in the way most sadfics do. Instead, it takes the premise and uses it to explore just how awful (in the fullest sense of the word) kindness can be. Fluttershy is entrancing as she quietly talks about the toll these terrible mercies take on her, and the interactions between her and Flitter are believable, if painful.

If I had to make one complaint, it'd be that Estee relies really heavily on punctuation in dialogue to get across the cadence of the speech, and it can be... almost--distracting.

Still, it's a powerful story, and I'd call it great.

Viking ZX
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Stick with it. It's a well done piece. It almost feels like something that was written as a challenge, and succeeded admirably.

Sharp Spark
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This hit home pretty hard. I think the deliberate push at unlikeableness for Flitter really sells the impact of the rest of the story – but in a lot of other hands it could easily have ended up as a trainwreck. Instead it skirts the edge quite well, never compromising its characters. Fluttershy is perhaps a little too 'neat' in terms of what she means for the story, but it's not really about her as much as it is about Flitter. It's a story that pushes just enough so that the reader feels the pain, and then slightly further so that it really hurts.

Thumbs up.

This story came out a month after another story about Fluttershy and the word murder and I kept conflating them instead of reading this.

I have yet to correct that mistake. Therefore, I thought this was -hilarious-. Thumbs up.

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