Unused Season 5 MLP Episodes – Part 5 (The Princess Comic-Con episode)

Sweetie Belle: "This is it, girls. This dress-up princess contest is finally here. We've been preparing for it, practised all our moves, and learnt how to trot without tripping on the hems of our dresses. You ready to wow the crowd?"
Apple Bloom: "And then maybe we'll finally get our Cutie Marks!"
Scootaloo: "Yeah… I don't know if I want a cutie mark in dressing up as a princess…"
Discord: "Oh, don't you three worry about that. Let's just say, I've seen what you get your marks for this season, and this unused episode isn't it."
Apple Bloom: "Did you girls hear that? WE'RE FINALLY GONNA GET OUT CUTIE MAR –
"Wait. What do ya mean, 'unused episode'? Ya mean audiences will never get to see the princess routine we worked on for weeks?"
Scootaloo: "Forget this, then. I'm outta here."
[The CMC leave]
Discord: "Oh, silly Twilight… It never occurred to you to ban me from using my powers of omnipotence to sow chaos in unused episodes, did it? Not like it'll matter. What's going to happen, a massive server breach four years from now?" [laughs]

Part 4 can be read here, discussing unused episodes which were not repurposed down the line, and thus are unique story ideas we did not got. Technically today's episode falls into that category too, but it's expansive enough to justify a blog post all to itself.

So, here we are. I've been teasing the last few posts about getting to the "Princess Comic-Con" episode, and now it's upon us. On top of the concept, it's the only one of these rejected episodes that progressed to the outline stage, so we actually have a whole 4,000+ word synopsis of the episode on top of the usual premise pitch. And I think this will allow me to discuss the process of making these things a little. If the past episodes have seemed uninteresting and pretty straightforward cases of "yeah, I see why that was dropped", well, this one is anything but. It's very interesting.

How To Be a Princess: Written by Scott Sonneborn – Premise

The usual date context first – the Premise of this is dated to October 29th, 2013. That was the exact same date the Premise for "The Cutie Map – Part 2" was submitted (Scott Sonneborn didn't write on that episode until the script, as we'll see).

Ponies are arriving in Canterlot from across Equestria – each dressed in a princess costume! Because tonight, Canterlot is hosting the biggest princess-themed party of the year -it’s like cosplay at ComicCon, except everyone is dressed as their favorite princess from the past or present!

TWILIGHT, as always, doesn’t want a big deal to be made about her. She’s excited to go to as one of her favorite historical princesses, but she is dreading just a little seeing all the ponies dressed as her. She loves being the Princess of Friendship, but being surrounded by dozens of ponies pretending to be her seems like a bit much. 

So you’d think she’d be happy to discover that among the dozens of Celestia, Luna, and Cadence costumes (as well as ponies dressed as princesses from the past), there’s only ONE pony dressed as the Princess of Friendship!  

Twi is relieved – at first. But tonight’s Princess Party isn’t just dress-up fun – it’s also a kind of pageant where you compete to prove that the princess you’re dressed as is the best princess of all. And the pony dressed as the Princess of Friendship is not exactly burning up the competition. 

In fact, she’s in last place. 

That’s because that pony is an uber-geeky superfan. She’s incredibly enthusiastic but totally has the wrong idea about who the Princess of Friendship is and what she does. Basically, anything the uber-fan does as “The Princess of Friendship” is pretty much the exact opposite of what Twi would really do or say. 

Twi worries that anypony who sees the uber-fan will get the wrong impression of the Princess of Friendship. And that could make Twilight’s job of spreading friendship that much harder. So Twilight subtly tries to coach the super fan dressed as her. Unfortunately, the uber-fan insists she knows better than anypony what the Princess of Friendship would or wouldn’t do. In fact, the uber-fan is so set on her own idea of how over-the-top mega-awesome the Princess of Friendship is, she simply does not believe this annoying pony giving her advice could actually be Twilight! Even when Twilight tells her it is! 

As Twilight deals with that, we’ll cut back and forth to the rest of the Mane Six’s adventures at the competition, each dressed as their favorite princess. Which in PINKIE’S is a completely made-up princess that completely confounds the judges. And due to a last second mix up, FLUTTERSHY ends up entered as RAINBOW DASH’s favorite warrior princess. While Rainbow Dash is signed up as the very demure, froofy, bunny-loving princess Fluttershy was going to go as. No changes are allowed at this late date, and competitive Rainbow Dash isn’t about to just drop out. So she’s going to find a way to win as the girly princess. Which inspires Fluttershy to do her best as the large-and-in-charge Warrior Princess she’s dressed as. 

RARITY has spent months creating dozens of princess costumes before finally settling on just the right one. And just in time – APPLEJACK is knocking on the door to go with her to the pageant! Only APPLEJACK has been so busy on the farm, she hasn’t even begun to think about which princess she’s going to go as! Applejack figured that Rarity would have a bunch of extra costumes laying around. And she does. AJ would be happy with any of them. But not Rarity: if AJ is going to wear one of Rarity’s creations, it has to be exactly the right one: the perfect match! They’ll have to try them all on. 

But the clock is ticking – the princess party is already underway! 

Twilight learns just in time that she should stop trying to change her uber-fan and just accept her for who she is – because that’s really what (The Princess of) friendship is all about.  Of course, that means the fan flames out in the competition. (Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash are so convincing in their roles that they end up sharing first prize.)  When the uber-fan finally realizes that she’s spent the whole day with the real Princess of Friendship, she could care less that she didn’t even place in the big competition, and admits that perhaps some of her choices in how to play Twilight weren’t as spot-on as she thought.

I know what your first thought is – that you cannot believe only one pony would dress as Twilight at a princess dress-up contest. Certainly, it's a tough pill to swallow in the wake of "Canterlot Boutique", where's Twilight's popularity rocketed the Princess dress to astronomical sales. But that episode was months off being conceived, and slotted into the context of Season 4, where Twilight is jostled about in Manehattan like she's an ordinary pony, it's perfectly believable (don't forget, one unfortunate side casualty of the writing process FiM employed is the freelance writers often only get minimal glimpse into story arcs and status quo changers beyond what is needed for their episodes). Yes, that still doesn't quite excuse it in this episode, but I feel not only are there ways to make it work with extra details, but that part isn't even a necessary detail – just had it so there are other Twilight cosplayers, but she fixates on someone misrepresenting her because of course she does.

From the start, I love some of the lore present here, enough to make Princess Comic-Con feel like a natural thing in Equestria and not just a Pony fandom nod (plus, it's a kids' convention, so DHX wouldn't go inserting nods to body pillows and other adult things… right? [pupils shift suspiciously to "Stranger Than Fan Fiction"]). We've already had Blueblood and Platinum, of course there would be many more non-alicorn Princesses. And if it gave itself the license for ponies to come as fictional princesses, that gives an out to have more wacky ones, like the bunny-loving one Fluttershy preferred or Dash's warrior princess, without them putting a strain on the believability.

As is common for Premises, some of the ideas feel a bit sketched-in and loose (Dash and Fluttershy tie? Uh-huh), so I'm not going to dwell on the specifics here. Though the fact that the pairings from "Trade Ya!" are reused, except for Pinkie and Twilight being on their own, is… a choice. But an unavoidable choice, for each pony's plot line here would only work with them. Again, I'll say more on this at the outline, when a lot of the specific change.

How To Be a Princess: Written by Scott Sonneborn – Revised Premise

It's common for an episode to have the writer made tweaks to the premise following feedback and resubmit a few days later. Usually it's only the Revised Premise which is submitted to higher-ups for proofing. This is usually the same text with some paragraphs rewritten, added or subtracted. They thus feel like if one wrote an idea one day, then the next day had small improvements and changes strike them and just glued them onto their original work.

As you'll see, the changes here, 4 days later on November 4th, 2013, are mostly adding new details, or revising character behaviour. As well they should, given the kind of show this is. All text that is identical to the first premise is struck through, to highlight the new parts.

Ponies are arriving in Canterlot from across Equestria – each dressed in a princess costume! Because tonight, Canterlot is hosting the biggest princess-themed party of the year -it’s like cosplay at ComicCon, except everyone is dressed as their favorite princess from the past or present! (We’ll use this as an opportunity to introduce the fact that there were Princesses who ruled prior to Celestia and Luna taking over.)

TWILIGHT, as always, doesn’t want a big deal to be made about her. She’s excited to go as one of her favorite historical princesses, but she is dreading just a little seeing all the ponies dressed as her. She loves being the Princess of Friendship, but being surrounded by dozens of ponies pretending to be her seems like a bit much.

So you’d think she’d be happy to discover that among the dozens of Celestia, Luna, and Cadance costumes (as well as ponies dressed as princesses from the past), there’s only ONE pony dressed as the Princess of Friendship!

Twi is relieved – at first. But tonight’s Princess Party isn’t just dress-up fun – it’s also a kind of pageant where you compete to prove that the princess you’re dressed as is the best princess of all. And while the Princess Twilight cosplayer is incredibly enthusiastic, she totally has the wrong idea about Twilight. She’s portraying her as a princess obsessed with tiaras, tea parties, and ball gowns!

Twilight subtly tries to coach the super fan dressed as her. Just because Twilight is a Princess, doesn’t mean she doesn’t have interests outside getting dressed up and going to parties. Unfortunately, the uber-fan insists she knows better than anypony what the Princess of Friendship would or wouldn’t do. In fact, the uber-fan is so set on her own idea of how the Princess of Friendship acts, she simply does not believe this annoying pony giving her advice could actually be Twilight! Even when Twilight tells her it is!

As Twilight deals with that, we’ll cut back and forth to the rest of the Mane Six’s adventures at the competition, each dressed as their favorite princess. Which in PINKIE’S is a completely made-up princess that completely confounds the judges.

And due to a last second mix up, FLUTTERSHY ends up entered as RAINBOW DASH’s favorite warrior princess. While Rainbow Dash is signed up as the very demure, froofy, bunny-loving princess Fluttershy was going to go as. No changes are allowed at this late date, and competitive Rainbow Dash isn’t about to just drop out. So she’s going to find a way to win as the girly princess. Which inspires Fluttershy to do her best as the large-and-in-charge Warrior Princess she’s dressed as.

Meanwhile, RARITY has spent months creating dozens of princess costumes before finally settling on just the right one. And just in time – APPLEJACK is knocking on the door to go with her to the pageant! Only APPLEJACK has been so busy on the farm, she hasn’t even begun to think about which princess she’s going to go as! Applejack figured that Rarity would have a bunch of extra costumes lying around. And she does. But if AJ is going to wear one of Rarity’s creations, it has to be exactly the right one: the perfect match!

Applejack is annoyed that Rarity won't let her just pick any old princess costume so they can get to the party already. And at first, Rarity is only doing that because her vanity won't allow her to let one of her costume creations be seen unless it’s the perfect fit. But the process of trying on all the different costumes forces Applejack to think about what kind of princess she'd like to be. That's not something Applejack normally spends any time thinking about. But in doing so she realizes that even for someone as down to earth as she is, in Equestria, there's a princess that fits her to a “T”.

In the end, Twilight is able to convince her doppelganger that being a Princess can mean many things, and that there isn’t a “right way” to be one. The cosplaying uber-fan is totally on board with this lesson, but decides that she’ll dress as a different princess next time around. Princess Twilight is awesome in her own way, but now that she knows more about her, the young pony realizes that Twilight is not the Princess she aspires to be -- a sentiment that the real Princess of Friendship understands and accepts. Meanwhile, while Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy entered the contest knowing exactly what kind of princesses they wanted to be, the mix-up allowed them to gain a deeper respect for the princesses they portrayed instead. And Pinkie Pie proves that you really can be any kind of princess—even one that doesn’t exist!

So what changed? A line specifying how more princesses will be showcased was added, but the first real difference is revising the Twilight fan's behaviour – now instead of being an Uber-geek who has Twilight all wrong, she thinks Twilight is a girly, frilly princess. This makes sense, it might have stretched credibility for Twilight to react so strongly to someone who isn't that different from what she was like before. At least, from the "making it clear for kids" standpoint. Otherwise, we see an extra paragraph added to the Rarity/AJ subplot that fleshes it out beyond being basically a joke subplot (already this feels like a decision to elevate it above their story in "Trade Ya!"). And the conclusion to the whole episode changes everyone's takeaway points, with a more layered amicable split between Twilight and the fan, and a less idealised ending for Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy.* And if Pinkie's seems to end a bit abruptly – well, she is Pinkie.

* Worth noting one of the nearly 13 unused episode ideas in Season 3 was called "Flutterdash", and had them undergo an accidental body swap on the way to a jousting competition (or something similar) that Dash wanted to enter at a fair in the Crystal Empire, which was still picking itself up following its liberation in the season premiere (where it was also established to be the former kingdom of Chrysalis – yes, you heard me right). So Dash had to coach Fluttershy to perform in her place. It's different enough that I won't definitely say they were pulling from old stuff, but the possibility is there.

I think, despite the issues that are present in the episode ideas and the story as presented here, it's apparent to see why it was approved to at least progress to the outline stage. The basic concept is instantly appealing, the notion of another "everyone gets their own subplot" episode is irresistible, and many of these plots have great potential for dialogue, gags, and especially visual flourish.

How To Be a Princess: Written by Scott Sonneborn – Outline

I am going to break this outline up between most scenes with my own observations (I haven't looked ahead, so I won't know anything more than you do reading this now). It is just over 4,000 words, it'll keep it nicely segmented.

As always, the outline itself is completely unedited, typos, grammar errors and missing words be darned.

TEASER

1) INT. TWILIGHT’S CASTLE – DAY

SPIKE is shocked as he opens the door for RAINBOW DASH - and finds her dressed in the armor, shield, crown and dress of a fabulous warrior princess! “Say hello to the Princess of Power!” she tells him. 

Whoa, wait - Rainbow Dash is now a princess?!? 

Rainbow Dash rushes past Spike and into the castle in a big hurry. She’s waiting for two more princesses, and then they and Twilight have to go right away. Spike wonders which other two princesses are coming – Celestia and Luna? 

But he’s beyond shocked when the two princesses who arrive are FLUTTERSHY and PINKIE – both in fabulous princess attire as well! 

Spike can’t believe it. “Wait, you three are all princesses now!!?” he splutters. Before they can answer, Twilight enters – wearing a different tiara and gown, an entirely different Princess costume than she normally does. “Say hello to the Princess of Parchment!” she says.

The other ponies think Twi looks awesome in her new princess outfit. “You’ll be a great Princess of Parchment!” they tell her. But Spike is beside himself. 

“You’re the Princess of Parchment now!?!?” he exclaims. “In addition to the Princess of Friendship? Are you getting another set of wings too?!?”

 “Ok, hang on!” says Spike “I’ve lived in Equestria a long time and seen some crazy things. But this just defies all logic of the world as I’ve known it! It’s like anypony can suddenly become a princess - any princess they want!” 

Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie and Twi all reply in unison: “Yup!” And as Spike faints in response… END TEASER

You'll have observed in the Premises, but the Outlines especially use those kinds of thought lines as substitutes for description/dialogue, alongside prototype dialogue. It does turn out to be a very efficient way of projecting an image into one's head of how this would play onscreen. Me, I can read the above and basically storyboard it in my head.

Obviously, it does have a clunky "gotta get the exposition out of the way but make it funny" feeling to it, making Spike mysteriously not know about the Princess Party so it can be explained to him. Don't worry about that, I've read more than enough scripts to know that finding a more natural way to get across the exposition happens frequently enough.

ACT ONE

2) INT. TWILIGHT’S CASTLE – RESUME

As they revive Spike, Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy and Pinkie explain that any pony really can be any princess she wants. 

For tonight. 

Because tonight is the Princess Party at the Rainbow Falls Arena. It’s a huge princess-themed convention. (Think cosplay at ComicCon, except everyone is dressed as their favorite princess, including past princesses and princesses from famous fairy tales). There’s even a competition (for those who choose to enter) to determine who best represents the princess they are dressed as (and a surprise celebrity guest is going to crown the winner!)

Rainbow Dash has already signed up to compete as her favorite warrior princess. Fluttershy is going to compete as the sweet and gentle, bunny-loving fairy-tale princess she’s dressed as. No one recognizes the princess Pinkie is going as – which makes sense when Pinkie explains that she just made this princess up! Twilight is going as one of her favorite historical princesses, the Princess of Parchment – the princess who invented the scroll! 
As the four ponies show off the costumes Rarity made for them, RD wonders, “Hey, where is Rarity?” Fluttershy says that Apple Jack is picking up Rarity and then they are all going to meet at the station – where they all have to take the train to get the Princess Party at Rainbow falls. 

As the four friends head off to the station…

3) INT. RARITY’S HOUSE – AT THAT SAME TIME

RAIRTY races around frantically. She has spent months creating dozens of princess costumes. The room is full of them. But it’s only just now, at the very last second, after trying them all on a dozens times, that she has finally settled on the perfect one for her. 

For Rarity, the Princess Party is a huge business opportunity. The biggest vendor there is considering carrying Rarity’s princess costumes at all the other princess conventions held throughout the year. For Rarity to seal the deal, every one of Rarity’s costumes worn tonight has to be absolutely perfect. Rarity knows the costumes she made for Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Twilight and Pinkie are exactly that. And now she’s found the perfect fit for herself too. 

And just in time – APPLEJACK is knocking on the door to walk with her to station to take the train to Rainbow Falls! Only APPLEJACK has been so busy on the farm, she hasn’t even begun to think about which princess she’s going to go as! Applejack figured that Rarity would have a bunch of extra costumes laying around. And she does. AJ would be happy with any of them. But not Rarity: if AJ is going to wear one of Rarity’s creations, it has to be exactly the right one: the perfect match! 

AJ has to wear a costume to go the Princess Party, and Rarity definitely doesn’t want her friend to miss out. So there’s only one thing to do. AJ will have to try on all of Rarity’s costumes! And fast! The clocking is ticking!

You can just picture AJ's eyelids drooping in resignation at that last beat, can't you?

And while it's not Princess of Books, Princess of Parchment is a pretty good alternative for hitting that same sweet spot in a way that fits in-universe, no?

You'll see that some scenes are pretty easy extensions of what happened in the Premise – this first Rarity scene is one of those, just giving more vivid descriptions and character stakes, but feeling much the same as anyone looking at the Premise would do if they were tasked with expanding upon it. Nothing worse than the trap of details in the writer's head that didn't make it to the page! But if they're written well, a similar image will be conjured for all readers.

4) INT. RAINBOW FALLS ARENA/ PRINCESS CONVENTION – LATER

As FS, RD, Twi and Pinkie enter the Rainbow Falls Arena, they can’t believe AJ and Rarity missed the train. AJ and Rarity still have time, but the two better make the next train, or they’ll be late for the Princess Party. 

And they wouldn’t want that, because the Princess Party is awesome! The entire Arena has been decorated in a Princess theme. There are booths selling Princess stuff. And best of all, there are dozens of ponies dressed as Princesses! 

As always, Twilight doesn’t want a big deal to be made about her. Luckily, dressed in her costume, no one will know it’s her. Still, she thinks it’s going to be a bit embarrassing being surrounded by a bunch of ponies pretending to be her.

But while they spot five Cadances, eight Lunas, 11 Celestias (plus other princesses from fairy tales, as well as historical princesses like Princess Platinum) there’s not a single pony dressed as the Princess of Friendship!

Despite what she said, Twi can’t help but be a little disappointed by that. But she immediately laughs it off. She’s here to have fun! In fact, she’s not even registered for the competition. Twi’s been so busy, she didn’t have time to study and practice for the various rounds of the competition (costume, talent, etc.) to really represent her princess properly. 

Pinkie, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash have pre-registered for the competition. But before they can sign in at the REGISTRATION DESK, Rainbow Dash runs into another pony dressed as the same warrior princess as her! That pony is a real mean girl who RD has a history with. When RD gallantly says, “May the best pony win,” the mean pony jerkily laughs at Rainbow Dash’s chances of beating her! Oh, it’s on now! There’s no way RD is letting that jerk win. 

Just one problem: when Rainbow Dash’s turn to sign in arrives, she finds that due to some mix up, Fluttershy was entered as Rainbow Dash’s favorite warrior princess! While Rainbow Dash has been signed up as the very demure, bunny-loving princess Fluttershy was going to go as! 

HOITY TOITY and the other Princess Party Pageant (that’s what the competition is called) officials sitting behind the registration desk are very sorry, but the rules of the pageant are very strict. No changes are allowed at this late date. 

(As a sign of how strict the rules are, Hoity then turns away the next pony in line who is dressed as Chrysalis. “Sorry, that’s a queen, not a princess,” Hoity tells the disappointed pony as he sends her packing). 

But competitive Rainbow Dash isn’t about to just drop out. She’s not going to give up and let that jerk win. She and FS are gonna swap costumes, and RD is going to find a way to win the pageant as the sweet and gentle princess! If anything, RD thinks being such a nice and tender princess should be way easier than being a tough princess! 

Fluttershy is very nervous about staying in the competition as the Warrior Princess. But she does because she doesn’t want her friend’s favorite princess to misrepresented by that mean pony. “I’ll do my best to be brave and noble – and not mean like that other pony. I won’t let you or your princess down, Rainbow Dash!” 

At the registration desk, Pinkie takes her turn to sign in. Hoity Toity checks her name off his list. “You’re going as Princess Humahumamanamamana?” he asks. “Um, I’m not familiar with that princess.” 

“Of course you aren’t,” exclaims Pinkie. “I made her up!” Hoity double-checks the rules. Usually, ponies compete as their favorite current or historical princess, or a well-known princess from a fairy tale. But there’s nothing in the rules that says you can’t make up your princess. Which means there’s nothing Hoity can do but allow Pinkie to compete! 

Just then, everypony’s attention turns to the entrance to the arena. Another contestant is making her entrance. And it’s a way over the top entrance! Carried by gladiator ponies and wearing way too much make-up, carriying a scepter, and wearing a princess costume that is way too frilly, this pony is a total pageant pony in a very HONEY BOO-BOO kind of way. Her name is PRETTY SWEET, and classy she ain’t. 

Twilight wonders what horrible princess Pretty Sweet is supposed to be in her garish make up and over the top costume – only to have Pretty Sweet swoop up to the registration desk and announce she’s here as Princess Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship! 

The look on Twi’s face says it all: Oh no!

"in a very Honey Boo-Boo kind of way"? Well, it was 2013… Already, I can't help but feel this new character could just as easily be substituted for Diamond Tiara. Or better yet, Silver Spoon – give her something to do?

That Chrysalis gag is one that would actually work, as long as one can buy a pony dressed up as a tyrant that tried to take over the land. Time for another Derpy cameo? All the justification needed, me thinks!

As for the unexplained mixup regarding Dash and Fluttershy's princesses getting swapped, already I can think of a way to fix that – Dash's standoff with her old rival could have started when Dash was midway through signing in, and in the confusion of their debate (Dash could pick up the wrong sign-in sheet while arguing with the other pony or something – let the layout artists worry on the practicalities), it got swapped with Fluttershy's who was signing up right next to them.

ACT TWO

5) INT. RAINBOW FALLS ARENA/ PRINCESS CONVENTION – BACKSTAGE

As Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie get ready for round one of the pageant, Twilight approaches Pretty Sweet. Pretty Sweet is incredibly enthusiastic in a completely over-the-top way. But she totally has the wrong idea about Twilight: She’s portraying her as a princess obsessed with tiaras, tea parties, and ball gowns! 

Twilight finds that really embarrassing. That’s not the way she is at all! And she wouldn’t want anyone to think it is. 

So Twilight subtly tries to give Pretty Sweet some advice as to what the Princess of Friendship is really like: Twilight is a Princess, yes, but that doesn’t mean she is only into getting dressed up and going to parties. 

But Pretty Sweet quickly cuts her off. When it comes to the Princess of Friendship, Pretty Sweet says, there’s nothing anypony can teach her! Because she is Twilight’s biggest fan! She insists she knows better than anypony what the Princess of Friendship would or wouldn’t do. In fact, Pretty Sweet is so set on her own idea of what the Princess of Friendship is like, she simply does not believe this pony giving her advice could actually be Twilight! Even when Twilight tells her it is! 

6) INT. RARITY’S HOUSE – CONTINUOUS

Apple Jack’s already tried on a bunch of costumes. They’re running out of time. Can’t they just pick one and go already? No, says Rarity. If AJ shows up in one of Rarity’s costume that doesn’t suit her perfectly, it will sink Rarity’s deal. But Rarity also doesn’t want her friend to miss out on the Princess Party. They’ve just got to work even faster to find the one that’s the right fit for AJ. 

Apple Jack replies that if they’re looking for the perfect one for her, they’re never going to find one. Because AJ just isn’t a princess kind of a pony. She’s practical, down to earth. The opposite of a princess. 

Rarity tells her that’s nonsense – there’s lots of ways to be a princess! True, many princesses wore fancy clothes. But Rarity pulls out one dress that –while still beautiful – is covered in pockets. Because it’s a replica of the dress Princess Pockets wore. In the famous fairy tale, Princess Pockets had to go on a dangerous quest and was only allowed to bring what she could carry in her pockets. So she cleverly had the royal tailor create a dress with dozens of pockets, allowing her to carry every thing she needed. 

AJ never heard that story. But she likes it - that sound like something AJ would do in that situation! Rarity insists that’s just one example; she pulls out other costumes that are replicas of dresses worn by other princesses who were equally down to earth and practical. Rarity thinks any of these would be perfect for AJ. But now that AJ, who had never really thought about princess before today, knows that there are princesses like her, she wants to try on all the costumes to find the one that’s just right for her. But they’ve got to do it quick if they want to get to the Princess Party before it’s over!

Okay, maybe Pretty sweet couldn't be substituted for Diamond Tiara or Silver Spoon, who have met Twilight as a Princess on at least a few occasions. Nothing much else to say, this is basically the same info as in the Revised Premise. Let's just hope a balancing act could be reached by DHX and the voice actress to make Pretty Sweet not come across as totally obnoxious. Though the idea of someone transforming the idea of a pony to match what they want out of their hero, that's intriguing enough.

I actually quite dig the Applejack/Rarity segment – I can easily imagine an alternate storybook art style with limited animation accompanying Rarity's tale (that always spruces things up). And the notion of Applejack getting swayed into doing this right once she realises there's aspects of this she can relate to? Why not, that fits, I'm all for that!

7) INT. RAINBOW FALLS ARENA/ PRINCESS CONVENTION – ON STAGE

Back at Rainbow Falls, it’s time for round one of the Princess Party Pageant to begin! All of the ponies who have signed up to compete are on stage, while the rest of the ponies (including Twi) are in the audience, watching excitedly. 

The Princess Pageant has three rounds  - which together will determine which pony best represents the princess she’s dressed as. Round one is the Costume Competition. First up is Rainbow Dash’s nemesis – who confidently struts across the stage in her Warrior Princess costume. 

Next comes Fluttershy in the same costume. Hoity Toity and the other judges quickly give her the hook when her warrior princess costume has a wardrobe malfunction and all the weapons on it misfire – sending arrows and spears flying everywhere! 

With Fluttershy out, Rainbow Dash can’t give up if she wants to be sure her nemesis doesn’t win. So RD suffers through the indignity (and heels!) of the tight, frilly dress she has to wear – and she manages to just barely pull it off and get to the next round. 

Now it’s Pretty Sweet’s turn. Her make-up and costume are so over-the-top ridiculous that they actually make Twi realize she’s been worried about nothing. Pretty Sweet is so obviously not like Twilight at all, that the judges will see that immediately and kick her out of the competition. 

With a look of total confusion, Hoity and the other judge watch Pretty Sweet proudly strutting her stuff on stage. When Pretty Sweet finishes, the judges deliberate. 

“This is the first year anypony has ever come as the Princess of Friendship,” Hoity talks it over with the other judges. “And Twilight probably has changed since receiving her official title and dominion. And Pretty Sweet did seem very princess-y up there, so…” The judges assume this must be what Twilight is like now. They give Pretty Sweet a high score and moving her on to the next round! 

Twilight can’t believe what she just heard! Ponies actually think Twilight is like Pretty Sweet?!? Her fears are confirmed when Twi then sees a nearby vendor of princess merch take down the “Twilight Sparkle Journal and Quill” set he had been selling, and replace it with the “Twilight Sparkle Too-cute Tiara and Tea Party set!”

This is where we see proper deviations from the Premise, which naturally didn't give concrete details about the contest itself. This does, obviously. And you can feel Sonneborn doing his best to avoid making this a repeat of "Trade Ya!", having the plot lines overlap in the same scene now. And with Fluttershy out early, she can sit with Twilight in the audience, allowing for different Mane 6 pairings (plus, the Twilight/Fluttershy pairing is vastly under explored, getting more of that is always good). That would be an addition I'd make!

I will admit one can feel a little Dave Polsky sneaking its way in here in some of the more lubricious plot decisions, like Pretty Sweet getting away with a high score because the judges haven't bothered to check what kind of Princess Twilight is and have no "reference" for this.

And man, "Sparkle's Seven" ain't got nothing on Rainbow Dash's embarrassment at being in a dress here, huh?

8) INT. RAINBOW FALLS ARENA – ON STAGE - LATER

We’re on to Round Two of the Princess Pageant – the Talent Competition. Each contestant has to show her skill at the talent her princess was famous for. 

Pinkie goes first – and demonstrates a never-before seen, completely made up talent. Since Pinkie is a made-up princess with a made-up talent, the Judges have no idea if what they just saw was what that princess would do. “Was that good?” they ask. “That was awesome!” Pinkie assures them. “That’s exactly what the princess I just made up would do.” The judges deliberate, shrug and move Pinkie on to the final round! 

Now it’s Rainbow Dash’s nemesis turn. The mean girl pony shows off her talent at using the warrior princess’s shield and spear in an incredible demonstration of martial skill. She makes it to the finals. 

Then it’s RD’s turn to demonstrate the “totally lame” (in her opinion) talent of her princess: bunny petting. But she’s got to do it to stay in the competition and beat her nemesis. Unfortunately, bunny petting proves to be harder than she thought; it involves keeping 15 bunnies all happily petted at the same time. That’s not easy –bunnies get very jealous when one gets more attention than another (ANGEL is one of the bunnies and particularly hard to wrangle). Keeping them all equally petted involves RD dashing around and contorting herself (not easy in her froofy princess dress). Covered with sweat, RD just barely pulls it off (with some advice from Fluttershy, sitting with Twilight in the audience). RD hears she’s on to the final round, then collapses off stage. 

Next, Pretty Sweet carries a stack of books out and places them in the middle of the stage. Twilight is optimistic – maybe Pretty Sweet is actually starting to get what Twi is really like! But Pretty Sweet just uses the stack of books as a platform to put several shiny tiaras on. The talent she’s demonstrating is picking the prettiest tiara! Pretty Sweet waves her arms around and concentrates, like David Copperfield in the middle of a complicated routine. And after a huge build up she…picks the prettiest tiara! 

The judges burst into applause! Pretty Sweet is on to the final round. 

Twilight can’t believe it! Picking pretty tiaras isn’t a talent of hers! She’s never even done that once! She’s not that kind of princess! 

But sitting with Fluttershy in the audience, Twilight calms herself. She’s got to be over reacting, right? I mean, yes, Pretty Sweet is giving everypony who sees her the wrong idea of what the Princess of Friendship is like. But how many ponies are even going to see her? There’re only a few dozen ponies here at the Princess Party, and its not like there are any reporters or anything to spread the word all over Equestria or something….

Which is exactly when Princess Cadance enters – followed by a group of reporters and a crowd of other ponies excited that she is the surprise celebrity guest who has come to crown whoever wins the final round of the pageant! 

Twilight overhears one of the reporters comment how his story is going to feature all the competitors in the finals and how they are all exactly like the princesses they’re dressed as! 

Uh oh!

If you, like me, are already throwing your arms up at Pinkie getting by because she made this Princess up – all that would be needed there is the judges realising earlier that now they have to forbid made-up princesses from now on, but can't do anything about it this year. I'm reminded of a passage in the classic sci-fi novel Ender's Game, where in one space training Ender's team wins by having most of their players deliberately stunned and used as a shield to get to the goal – after that the rule was changed to make it so you had to win by taking out the opposition properly (the details may be a little fuzzy there, I haven't read the book in a decade).

ACT THREE

9) INT. RAINBOW FALLS ARENA/ PRINCESS CONVENTION –  A LITTLE LATER

There’s a little time before the final round, and Pretty Sweet and the others still in the competition are taking a moment to relax. A YOUNG PONY comes up to Pretty Sweet and says she thinks she’s a really cool princess – much to Twilight’s horror. But before Twi can say anything, Cadance trots up. “Twilight?” exclaims Cadance, surprised to see her friend. “Yes!” reply Twilight and Pretty Sweet at the same time. “You see?” Pretty Sweet tells Twilight. “I’m so good at being the Princess of Friendship, even Princess Cadance thinks I’m her!” 

Cadance sets her straight. Cadance was addressing the actual Twilight, the pony next to Pretty Sweet dressed as the Princess of Parchment. That’s what gets Pretty Sweet to finally realize what Twilight’s been trying to tell her all along – that Twi really is Twi! 

As that sinks in, Cadance trots off to get ready to crown whoever wins the final round (Cadance comments as she goes that she’s glad Twi didn’t enter the competition – it would hard for Cadance not to root for her sister-in-law above all the others!). Twilight tells Pretty Sweet that now that Pretty Sweet is finally ready to listen, it’s not too late. Twilight can teach her what the Princess of Friendship is really like in time for the final round! 

10) MONTAGE: In a fun montage (set to a song?) Twi explains there are lots of kinds of princesses, and that Twilight’s kind of princess is not all about tiaras, tea parties, and fancy (horse) shoes. 

END MONTAGE ON: Pretty Sweet excitedly exclaiming: “I get it! I finally I get it. I know exactly what to do now!” Twi beams – until Pretty Sweet adds: “I’m going to drop out of the competition!"

Don't judge the lacklustre song segment too harshly – they always seem this way in outline form when you can't even imagine what they might sound like.

Again, don't worry about Cadance not actually saying anything relevant to Twilight despite asking for her – that's the sort of detail that could be fixed for later (though the comment about not wanting rooting bias is neat!).

Otherwise, I do like this for making Pretty Sweet more humble, and not just, you know, a pampered pony filly living in the life of luxury.

11) INT. RAINBOW FALLS ARENA – ON STAGE – CONTINUOUS

Rainbow Dash takes the stage, as the final round of the Princess Pageant begins. In this round, the contestants have to answer questions about their princess – while staying in character as their princess. Judge Hoity Toity asks RD: “Why did you choose to be this princess?” Rainbow Dash answers honestly: “I didn’t!” 

The crowd GASPS! Including Fluttershy, who is sitting in the audience. 

“I didn’t pick this princess, my friend Fluttershy did,” RD continues. “I was originally going to be a warrior princess who is totally tough and totally cool.” 

Instead she got stuck being a sweet and gentle princess. Rainbow Dash thought it would be easy. But then she tried it. And found out that what this princess does is just as tough as being a warrior. “I discovered being this princess is just as cool in its own way as being a warrior princess! There are lots of cool ways to be a princess!”

Led by Fluttershy, the crowd bursts into a slow clap of applause, totally wowed by her speech. It’s an awesome moment. “Wonderful speech!” Hoity declares. “But it’s not at all what your princess would have said.” “Errrr!” the buzzer sounds as Hoity buzzes RD off stage. 

“Ha! Ha!” laughs RD’s jerky nemesis, “You’re out!” 

RD fumes. Until –

“Errrr!” the buzzer sounds again. “That’s not at all what your princess would say either,” says Hoity, as we reveal that it was Fluttershy whispering in his ear who tipped him off to that fact! 

The mean pony is out too! As she stomps off angrily, RD joins FS in the audience. FS says she’s sorry RD didn’t win. But RD is smiling: “It’s like the Warrior Princess always said,” says RD, “Winning is good, but making your enemies lose can be just as good!”

So many moments here that would be awesome to watch (like, everyone-in-the-stream-channel-goes-nuts-level awesome). Dash losing on that kind of technicality and her rival tripping over her own hooves like that especially. Though Fluttershy going sneaky and reminding Hoity the rival broke character too is just the best. Swift retribution! And Dash's final words, alongside her earlier speech, that’s pretty nice too.

12) INT. RAINBOW FALLS  - BACKSTAGE WITH TWILIGHT AND PRETTY SWEET – CONTINUOUS

Twilight doesn’t understand. Why would Pretty Sweet drop out now that she finally understands what kind of princess Twilight is? 

But that’s just it. Now that Pretty Sweet understands exactly what kind of princess Twilight is, she knows that’s not at all the kind of princess Pretty Sweet wants to be. Twi may not love tea parties, but Pretty Sweet does because they are a chance to get out her fine china and party down with friends and family. And Tiara’s are awesome because they make her feel strong and beautiful. 

Hearing that, it’s Twi who finally understands – the kind of Princess that Pretty Sweet wants to be may not be the kind Twi is, but it’s not a bad kind of princess to be at all. 

There are lots of ways to a princess. Twi’s not going to stand in the way of Pretty Sweet being the kind of princess she wants to be. That’s not what a friend – or a Princess of Friendship –would do. 

Twi tells Pretty to go on stage and be the Princess she wants to be.  

As Pretty Sweet takes to the stage (with her gladiator pony escort), the Young Pony comes over to Twilight. Watching Pretty in the background, the YOUNG PONY comes up to Twi. “Excuse me, Your Royal Princess of Friendshipness, but I saw what you just said,” the young pony tells Twilight. The young pony is really impressed how Twi accepted that Pretty Sweet had a different idea of what it means to be a princess. “I just think that’s really cool,” says the Young Pony as she walks away. Twilight beams.

As the judges give Pretty Sweet a high score. Cadance trots over to Twi (Cadance is here just to crown the winner, not judge). Cadance doesn’t understand - Pretty was nothing like Twi! Isn’t Twi worried about ponies getting the wrong idea about her?

Twilight says yes, but it’s okay. There may be some ponies who come away with the wrong idea about her. But there’s at least one pony leaving with exactly the right idea, says Twi as she smiles at the young pony.

Twilight learning a lesson too is pure FiM, but I approve of it. Though it's easy to imagine some fans taking the episode saying "being a girly princess who likes tea parties, dresses, fine china, etc." as Hasbro being greedy, I actually think showing the positive effects of a girl playing princess in terms of making her happy and having fun with friends is great. Certainly beats the kind of positive messages the Disney Princess brand thinks are unironically good ways to make girls feel about themselves!

Also, anyone else reminded of Toola Roola and Coconut Cream being the only ones in "Fame and Misfortune" to get what Twilight was trying to preach? One of the not-insufferable parts of that episode…

Just then, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy walk up – as Apple Jack and Rarity finally arrive! AJ is in the perfect princess costume for her – its beautiful, but also practical and down to earth. She looks awesome! It took awhile to find it, but AJ is glad they took the time. AJ had never thought much about princesses before, but now she knows there is one for her. More than one, actually. 

Just then, the BIG VENDOR walks up, glad to see Rarity. Seeing all of her costumes, the vendor is blown away. He’s especially taken with AJ’s. He absolutely wants to have Rarity join him at all the other conventions to sell her designs. And he’d like to have AJ come to all the conventions too, since she seems like such a perfect princess in her costume. AJ doesn’t know about that! She just got used to the idea of princesses – she’s not sure she’s ready to dress up as one every weekend. But Rarity is thrilled! She and AJ may have missed the competition, but she got her deal and there’s still the whole rest of the night of the Princess Party to enjoy. 

Including Cadance crowning the winner of the princess pageant. And that turns out to be…Pinkie! Yay! As the Mane Six celebrate by enjoying the rest of the Princess Party together, we are at…

THE END!

Yeah, I won't deny the Rarity/AJ plotline basically vanished for most of the episode there. But that's not any worse than what happened to them in "Trade Ya!", and still better then what happened to Spike – it just stands out more because here the Twilight, Pinkie, Fluttershy and Dash plot lines were all interwoven, or at least taking place in direct reference to one another. Though this would be the place for the judges to formally decree that only eligible princesses on the pre-approved list can be used in future years, after Pinkie swept it. Me, I would have made it clear that the slip-ups of Dash and the rival left only Pinkie and Pretty Sweet in the running, making it more believable she could win.

Poor Spike also vanished for basically the whole episode, again. Oh, MLP… Nothing that couldn't be rectified (and probably would be, given the opening scene would likely be changed to deliver the exposition more organically anyway). "Scare Master" had a reason for him being absent for much of it, fixing his costume (though a line stating this more directly got cut for time), and he still showed up for the final act. Have him accompanying Twilight for much of it, or maybe give him a princess from Power Ponies to go as, sure.

Concluding Thoughts

So, reading through a whole outline is quite telling, no? Whatever else, it really conjures up the episode in your head like you're watching it.

It's easy to look at the above outline and note the things that wouldn't work, or wouldn't work well. But remember – it's just an outline. When I've read other outlines, they seem more impressive only because my brain, naturally, transplants detail from the finished episode, both in writing and visuals, onto it. Strip that away, and this fares a good bit better than many outlines. There's still things that would be ideal to change – the plotline about making merch off of Princess Twilight's false portrayal seems to dissipate without explanation, but that could be solved by having Pretty Sweet still decide to open up and act as actual Twilight while on stage for Twilight's sake, or some other reason that makes the reporters decide to not include the Twilight part (Cadance could have a word, or maybe Pretty Sweet herself would). There's options there. Dash's rival, dunno what kind of personality she should have, but a vocal delivery as unique and smarmy as Suri's (in a different direction) would be great. And otherwise, there's plenty of opportunity for different dresses and outfits, and funny sight gags playing off of characters' usual personalities.

Why was this unused? I honestly have no idea. Maybe it felt cluttered and unfocused for the target audience? Maybe the amount of clearance required for an episode with tons of throwaway princesses would have been a nightmare? Maybe they thought they couldn't justify one only pony going as Twilight? Maybe the AJ/Rarity plotline just ended up being offscreen for too long?

Honestly, it might actually be as simple as the change from Meghan McCarthy as Story Editor (remember, "Castle Sweet Castle" and "Bloom and Gloom" were written first that season) to M.A. Larson. The episode could have been lost in the shuffle, or he didn't like it, or Scott Sonneborn was needed to write "The Cutie Map" while Larson got to grips handling so many episodes at once before he himself stepped in for that script. And by the time that was done, the episode was too far past to bother with. Due to the limited production time and budget, Hasbro generally doesn't discard episodes once they reach the script stage, no matter how problematic they might be.

In any case, regardless of why this episode wasn't used, I'd have liked to see it. Apply a mental filter to remember that the writing and animation process would smooth out some of the rough edges, and alter some plot lines, and it probably looks better, no?

Next time, this series wraps up with a look at Larson's rejected "Rainbow Confession" episode. It's the only unused episode that actually made it to a script format too. As it did get revived into "Rarity Investigates!" later, I won't go over every scene with this one, much less the script, but instead opt for a highlights reel of sorts. See you then!

Comments

[iisaw]

Yeah, I think this one would have made a good-to-excellent episode, depending on execution. I love Pinkie winning on sheer zany hubris!

[Ghost Mike]

5638791

I love Pinkie winning on sheer zany hubris!

Only Pinkie Pie, eh? It gives me the same kind of big grin I get from her winning that turkey call competition in “Filli Vanilli”. Never a bad thing to be reminded of!

[SuperPinkBrony12]

An interesting episode premise. Kind of a shame we didn't get it. Wouldn't have been the best episode ever, but I think if they'd let Dave Polsky take a crack at this he could've made it work.