Honest Trailers: The Henry Stickmin Collection · 1:19pm Sep 3rd, 2020
In a world where video games are either overpriced, underwhelming, or simply corrupted through the company’s actions, one ancient artifact from the Flash era of online games has been remastered and added to Steam that instilled faith into the community once again. It’s not big on gameplay, but more than makes up for it in sheer 2-D fun. Oh boy, poking fun at this is going to be hard.
The Henry Stickmin Collection
Play as the most unlucky but overpowered silent protagonist of all time since Doomguy, Henry Stickmin, a pencil-thin social loser with a penchant for mischief. And enter a game that’s basically just a choose-your-own-adventure book, but is actually engaging and creative thanks to its unique fail system. Get ready to die, be dismembered, and fall on your puffy face time and time again, in a game so cartoonish and over-the-top in its failures that it resembles a Roadrunner and Coyote cartoon.
What? I did say poking fun at this was going to be hard.
Go on an epic saga of middle-school doodles as you break into a bank, escape from prison, and steal a priceless diamond from a museum, riddled with explosions, quicktime events, and deaths galore. But those pale beside the sequels, which is something rare in modern media. Thrill as you infiltrate an airship of Redditors under the protection of the government, and… basically repeat Escaping the Prison in the next game. But the choices you make are vital to how the final and best installment plays out, where sixteen different scenarios happen to the remnants of the toppat clan and the government, and all of them are canon.
Yes. All of them. Including that one. You know the one.
Be ready to get overwhelmed by the series that’s basically a mishmash of every classic pop culture reference you can think of, where everything from video games to cartoons, anime to memes, is jumbled together in Henry’s options; which means Henry Stickmin is an omnipotent being who knows all; and that implies he can retrace his actions after his certain death. It kind of reminds you of another Henry, from the show Forever… Wait, who actually watched that? And meet other characters on his quest, like Ellie, the soft-spoken but tough prison buddy; Charles, the kamikaze helicopter pilot who was definitely a child of an Arab woman and a Japanese man; The Right Hand Man, the biggest Australian menace since the word wildfire; and… yeah, that’s basically it. These games were really simple. They were made by one dude. Mad respect, though, for real.
So prepare for the best game to blow $15 on if you have nothing better to do, and relive your elementary school memories of playing this in the computer lab and clicking to another tab when the teacher came around. With Flash shutting down at the end of 2020 (like we needed more bad news in 2020?!) seize the moment now. Or, you know, wait until Christmas and get it on discount.
Starring:
Henry Stickmin: Baby’s First OC
Ellie: Stop Simping Over A Stick Figure, Guys. She’s Flat.
Charles: Ouch, Charlie! That Helicopter Really Hurt!
Right Hand Man: Okuyasu Nijimura
And Dave: Paul Blart, Mall Cop
Henry’s Bizarre Adventure
You just got Distracted!
I got the perfect plan... this is the greatest PLAAAAAAAA--
-Charles