Batman V Superman Review · 8:51pm Apr 13th, 2020
Oooh boy... I am late to this one again. I'll be honest, I had zero plans to watch this, but I decided to anyway, cause, well, I need something to review. I'm keeping myself busy by watching movies to review in between my activities and work.
Now before I get into this review, I want to make something clear. If you like the film, great! Good for you. If you don't, also great. This is just my thoughts, my initial reaction to what I had seen. These are my opinions, they are not facts, that is all. ... Y'all good? Okay? Okay, great! Let's begin.
So Batman V Superman follows after the Man Of Steel film, as Bruce Wayne believes Superman is a massive threat to society after the destruction Zod and Superman left in their battle, and so taking on the Batsuit, he decides to try and stop Superman once and for all. But all is not well, as Lex Luthor is also getting work into development...
Oooh boy. Now before I begin, let me get all the pros out of the way, cause I do, I do have some pros.
Best thing I took away out of this was Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman.
She is... the best character in the whole film. Every second she was on screen, I loved her. She's not in a whole bunch, but I felt like she was the best character. Maybe it's because she's not a psycho, maybe it's because I was more interested in her story than everyone else, but either way, Gal Gadot nailed it. And she freakin' owned it in her own film, Wonder Woman, honestly, loved that one, she did good. Now character-wise and story-wise is up for debate, but as acting goes... Gal Gadot nails it.
Some of the action (when we were allowed to actually watch it) was okay. The fight between Supes and Batman was actually semi-cool.
Special effects were decent enough, though I think we should expect that in the 2010s, we can make everything look a billion times better than ever. The actors were... okay, for the most part, just okay. Though some we'll have to discuss...
... Okay, I cannot name any others. Um... Okay, that is bad, I... really cannot name anything else, that is... ooh boy. Here's the thing, I didn't watch this movie wanting to hate on it, I wanted to give it a chance, and yeah that is hypocritical of me to say that since, well, based on my behavior on some of the movies I review, I seem to expect the worst, I am admitting that. But I gotta be honest. ... I didn't like this movie. I tried to like it, I just couldn't.
Honestly, the movie suffers from two, very two big problems. One, it is incredibly rushed, and secondly, there is too much happening at once! There is so much crammed into this movie, it doesn't flow nice and smoothly, you have all of these different stories and plots fighting for attention, when your central one should have been focused on Batman and Superman! And I know they wanted to set up their own DC cinematic universe since Marvel was doing so well. ... But here's the thing guys.
MARVEL TOOK THEIR DAMN TIME. You know why Marvel's cinematic universe works so well? Because the movies took time, they took time to build the world in this universe, we got to learn about these individual characters and their origins and how each one of them plays into the story. You guys cannot put this much into the story, we loved Marvel's cinematic universe because they took their time to develop them! This is the exact reason why the Mummy bombed, you need to focus on making one good movie before setting up the next five!
Because of this, the entire story just falls flat on its face. You are struggling to learn what's going on, but then there's one thing happening on top of another, which only makes you even more confused.
Now let's talk about Batman, or what I honestly think is more accurate, Batman the Bully. 
Batman is such a bully! Why should I root for him, give me one good reason to root for this guy. Now I know, he's a confrontational guy, he fights for himself, but this guy's such a bully! Also I like to point out, Batman freaking murders people. ... Batman. Murders people. Okay, I'm not the biggest Batman fan, but last time I checked, he never killed people, he didn't even kill the Joker after he killed his girlfriend in one story! And he flat out murders people without any remorse for his actions. ... Truly he's a great hero, truly someone we can look up to. 
Yeah, and while we're on supers, let's talk about Superman.
... If I can be honest, nothing stands out about him, nothing of substance or interest, stands out about Superman. This guy is not interesting at all! Actually, even with that, my friend pointed out something that is worth noting, I will keep him anonymous for the sake of this review, but he added this point.
Look at how dour Superman is throughout so much of this movie! He looks so put-upon to actually, y'know, save people, like it demeans him just to even have to interact with these frail, puny humans.
Yeah, he really does! Where's your sense of adventure, where's the superman in you, Superman? I thought you did this because you always believed in helping people, always believing in saving people, where is that sense? It doesn't feel like that's here at all. Not even that, but he's barely in the film, he barely left an impact! This is Batman V Superman, this feels more like it wanted to tell a Batman story rather than Superman, because it favors Batman a lot more!
Oh and the actual conflict between these two? ... Barely any. There is no conflict, there is no reason for these two to hate each other, almost barely any! And even then, these two are such hypocrites about one killing more than the other, so it comes off more as psychotic and childish. The only duel we get of these two is a fight that only lasts a few minutes, and it doesn't feel like there's weight or tension, there's no clashing of idealogies; because again, last time I checked... people wanted to watch them fight because these two have different mind sets; Batman is dark and aggressive while Superman is kind and hopeful, seeing two mindsets that conflict with each other but it's ideas that we the average joes can identify with is great drama! There is none of that. Captain America: Civil War handled that better guys! A billion times better.
If Batman and Superman are supposed to be heroes, then I think Brandon Breyer from Brightburn has a higher chance of becoming a superhero, and he's a psycho! 
Now, Lex... Oooh boy.
Jesse Eisenberg, I love you man, you're a good actor, you have good work under your belt, but this was not your movie. And before anyone says anything, yes, I have been told that he is supposed to be the son of Lex Luthor. ... However, that does not excuse how he acts or is portrayed. Because last time I checked, according to DC fans, Lex Luthor is a suave, diabolical, intelligent mastermind. ... This guy is a freaking clown, he's insane, he acts like the Joker! Now to be fair, the idea of him spinning public opinion around to view Superman as the devil is not a bad idea, that's really good, and it shows how far he'll go to get the public on his side. He would manipulate the situation, to get their attention, and to get their praises!
... The problem is Lex behaves like a child! A clown! Am I supposed to take him seriously, cause guess what, I can't, and I never will. I did not feel afraid of this guy, I never felt scared, nothing! I was more scared of our freaking heroes than him! If your main villain can barely leave an impact... woooow.
And Lois Lane, oh honey... Sorry, I felt nothing. Actress was serviceable, but she just didn't do anything for me. And I didn't feel any chemistry between her and Superman, none. You know how to build chemistry between characters? Have them spend time with each other, have them do things that are simple and mundane, like every day people! We have nothing from these two!
And I know some people are gonna be annoyed at me for saying this... but I'm saying it anyway. DC, I know you're full of dark material, I get it, but oh my god, LIGHTEN UP! Where's your sense of adventure and fun, this is Batman V Superman, we finally have a movie where these two are the central protagonists! Have some fun with it, and put some damn color in the movie instead of depressing disgusting mush! But no, instead any fun that can be had is taken back to instead being all dark and 'mature' full on. I'm sorry, I know I'm beating a dead horse with this, but this shit always pisses me off. This feels like the behavior of pre-teens who think anything colorful and bright has zero substance or deep ideas. Yeah, because clearly nothing that's super colorful has anything deep to discuss or share...
*points to poster below*
And of course, clearly everything that's made for adults is soooo much more mature and sophisticated. Batman V Superman is a perfect representation of everything wrong with that idea. Hey, we don't have color or bits of humor to take a break from the seriousness of the situation, and all of our characters have nothing but frowns or angry expressions and kill without any remorse or consequence! We're a mature movie, we're totally mature and edgy! Uggghhh... I think the rivalry between Batman and Superman in the Lego Batman Movie and Lego Movie 2 has a lot more validity and weight, and those movies are fun!
And the war-lord side plot, why did that exist? Get rid of it, it has no purpose, who gives a damn? It only is there to put blame on Sups for yet another atrocity, which makes no sense... I'm starting to pick up a theme now. It's lacking common sense.
Also another thing I want to throw out, 100 points to our protagonists bringing danger to every civilian within 100 miles! I'm sure no one died during the final battle! Our heroes everyone, they're so responsible they'll bring the danger to your city making you live in fear and possibly die! Great job everyone!
And the last thing I wanna talk about, which I'm gonna keep in spoilers, I don't know how many wanna see it or not, but you know what, I'm still keeping it in spoilers.
Superman dies. ... In the second movie of this DCCU, Superman dies, killing Doomsday. Angry Joe summarized everything wrong with this decision, and I agree too. DC, you shot yourselves in the foot. You have wasted your chance, you have squandered your chance to make something great from this, and you know what? ... I feel nothing. I do not care he dies, and I'm supposed to! You're supposed to make me care, how do you ruin that? Because you've done this, you have no reason to make another Superman movie, you cannot make another solo Superman film, ya shot yourself! You used everything! Again, save that shit for the final movie!
And you know what? I'm going to say it again. MARVEL. DID IT. BETTER. I Am Iron Man anyone?
Ooof... oh boy. Lesson for writers out there, or soon to become writers. If you're going to set up or establish a universe, a cinematic or big one like this. One step at a time. One story at a time. Focus on making one good story before making five next ones.
If you liked it, good for you, but I don't think I'll wanna watch this again. I'm glad I did, but it don't mean I wanna see it again. Maybe this movie isn't for me, I dunno.
Me personally? Compared to the other films I've seen, 4 out of 10. There is effort in some places, and it's not the worst superhero movie ever (personally I think Fan4stic takes the trophy for that) but it's not a good movie, and it's a pretty bad start to a cinematic universe. But I can say, at the very least, it does seem like they took in some criticism for that, if Shazam is any indication.
Thanks for reading, have a great day everyone.
Imagine chucking Brightburn into the film. It'd make things a million times more interesting.
5241825
... actually, it really would.
That would explain soooo much.
... I'd watch that!
5241829
Especially given Bright's an evil Superman.
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Yeah. It's a bit rough. But the studio did fucl around with the DCEU a lot. Maybe the un fucked version could be better? To bad we dont live in that dimension
This movie is, in my own opinion, nothing less than an outright hatchet job on the characters of Batman and Superman. Simply a vile, dreadful, boring excuse for a movie, and I can't believe that nobody at DC or Warner Bros. ever thought twice about the idea of actually hiring Zack "Sucker Punch" Snyder to direct their DC cinematic universe. How, how, how did they ever think that the guy who made the 300 movie was a good fit for Superman of all characters? The mind boggles.
Told you this movie was terrible, that could've been the review right there.
Also if you want a good live action take on Lex, watch Supergirl, ironically he's played by the actor who played Lex's Nephew back in Superman IV.
Ya think it's a Coincidence that WatchMojo's top 10 list for worst villain plots in movies had Lex's plan as #1?
Okay, look. I can forgive the dark tone. I can forgive the colorless cinematography. I can even forgive the absence of humor.
However, I cannot and will not forgive the fact that Batman and Superman have practically no reason to fight in the movie. I mean, a smart writer would have them fight due to their different ideologies and methods of battling injustice. Unfortunately, the writers of this movie are so dumb that they came up with extremely contrived and convoluted reasons for them to fight.
That I cannot abide!
5241860
Nice pick. I freaking love Jon Cryer's Lex Luthor on Supergirl. He perfectly captured the character at his best.
5241887 I know right? He was great! He said he wanted to play the role to make up for Superman IV, and I'd say he succeeded.
You know what's even worse, they almost got Bryan Cranston to play Lex in BvS, that would've been awesome!
It's unfortunate, because in the right hands, this movie could have been great. I don't blame any of the actors, they were all trying their best with the material, and I saw at times what the story was going for. Even the Ultimate Edition, which I saw out of curiosity, fixes some problems in terms of story but never quite lands for me.
I can understand wanting to separate this from Christopher Reeves version by having a more serious tone, but this was going way too far. There are ways to balance a lighter, optimistic tone that evokes Reeves and the "Boy Scout" while still separating it by having more serious themes. Animated series and comic books have been doing it for years, why can't the movies? Henry Cavill can be charismatic and charming, look at The Man from Uncle and Mission Impossible: Fallout as examples. He deserved better, and I think with the right director and script, he could really shine.
I agree with you about Gal Gadot as Diana, she was one of the best parts of the movie. Can't wait to see her in WW84! Jeremy Irons as Alfred had a few good lines that made me chuckle. Ben Affleck did a good job with the acting, even if the script wasn't very good. I saw what Snyder was going for with the Dark Knight Returns inspiration, it just didn't work for me personally. I wanted to see Batman more as an actual detective, but the warehouse fight scene was pretty good. Again, it saddens me that there was potential with the cast and story, but it was rushed and mishandled.
5241888
I'd agree too. He's rapidly become one of the best parts of the show, definitely.
Maybe. Then again, part of me thinks that Bryan probably dodged a bullet there.
5241891 True, but he would've at least made a better Lex.
I don't think it helps that this movie was trying to follow up on...I believe two movies done by Christopher Nolan, with his Dark Knight Trilogy ending with Batman faking his death to retire.