Hey...bongo cat...you want to hear a joke?...Fallout 76... · 7:42am Nov 27th, 2018
HO! HO! HO! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WHY HELLO THERE...I'M OL' SAINT NICK...YOU MIGHT KNOW ME FROM THAT FAT FUCK FROM THE COCA-COLA BOTTLES EVERY YEAR! AND IF NOT...THEN I'M GOING TO HAVE TO SLAP A BITCH!...
I KNOW CHRISTMAS IS ONLY 29 DAYS AWAY...BUT I'M HERE TO TELL YOU ALL HAVE A SURPRISE EARLY CHRISTMAS GIFT COMING THIS CHRISTMAS EVE!...
ON CHRISTMAS EVE DAY, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO RECEIVE A VERY SPECIAL, HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS SPECIAL OF UNIVERSAL MAGIC WHERE ONE OF THE PONIES PROBABLY LEARNS SOMETHING ABOUT THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS...OR DOESN'T...WHO THE FUCK KNOWS!...
AND LATER THAT DAY ON CHRISTMAS EVE NIGHT, WHY A NEW EPISODE OF UNIVERSAL MAGIC OF COURSE.... A PROLOGUE... a-a fucking prologue? Really? Wow...this Masked Ghost guy is a an asshole...oh right, IT'LL SURELY BE A MAGICAL NIGHT FOR SURE...
BUT THAT'S NOT ALL...OH NO...SANTA HAS A BIG RED SACK FILLED WITH GOODIES YOU KNOW...IT'S ALL LIQUID AND WHITE AND...wait...what's that?...this isn't part of the court order from the judge?...I can't talk about my big red sack? Why not? I don't give a flying fuck what judge said, he can kiss my fat white ass...fuck him...oh fuck, I think they can hear... STARTING DECEMBER 1ST UP UNTIL CHRISTMAS DAY...THERE WILL BE A LITTLE ADVENT CALENDAR IN A BLOG POST FROM...THIS BOB TOM GUY...AND IT'LL PROBABLY BE SOME FUCKING CRAP FROM THE INTERNET ...WHO THE FUCK KNOWS...IT'LL PROBABLY JUST BE A YOU TUBE VIDEO THAT YOU'VE ALREADY SEEN...Fuck I need a drink...what? I don't give a fuck if it'll ruin my fucking liver...I'm fucking a thousand years old, you think I give a fuck about my health...I just want the sweet release of death damn it...AND WHO KNOWS...THERE MIGHT BE A POOR ATTEMPT AT TRYING TO MAKE FAKE CHRISTMAS SONGS FROM YOUR FRIENDS FROM UNIVERSAL MAGIC!!!
WELL I BEST BE OFF NOW...GOT TO GO KILL THE TURKEY SO IT DOESN'T COME BACK FOR THANKSGIVING NEXT YEAR...THAT WAY...CHRISTMAS WILL BE ALL OF NOVEMBER AND DECEMBER...AND THEN....THE WORLD!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.. ehhhhh...fuck life...I'm just going to go and try to put a shotgun in my mouth again and hope it blows my brain out this time...
~From Santa Claus...
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which part?...