• Member Since 3rd Jan, 2017
  • offline last seen April 16th

CocoaPone


Formerly North Winds

More Blog Posts34

  • 11 weeks
    Clinic

    Last week I had ended up in the mental clinic for about 3 days. I was given a lot of medication which seem to help to some extent. Ever since then I've been feeling very odd, very emotionally unstable. There's a lot of people watching over me currently, people from the clinic, people from my university, getting lots of calls and constant check ups on how I'm doing. It all seems like a lot of

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    0 comments · 45 views
  • 17 weeks
    Another year

    So far this year has started off like any other, massive seasonal depression with me sleeping away the days in my room. I wish I didn't live alone, or at least had some close friends to hang out with in person. A lot of things are messing with my head, it's hard to tell what I really need. I found myself turning to alcohol and weed more frequently despite how much I hate the substances. I just

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    0 comments · 31 views
  • 26 weeks
    Depression

    it's 5 in the morning, I woke up 3 hours ago after passing out the entire afternoon after classes. I missed an assignment that was due at midnight today, oh well.

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    0 comments · 40 views
  • 40 weeks
    Another end

    It's been nearly a year since I've last posted on here, and looking back it's surprising that I've been doing this since late 2017. I always come here to post the extreme highs and lows of my life, it helps me release all the things held up in me and also reminds me of these feelings I've experienced and how far I've come.

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    0 comments · 60 views
  • 91 weeks
    Moving on

    I have once again reached the end of a relationship. He had asked me to simply be friends until we could meet in person to try again, but I can't see that ever happening. It's once again time for me to move forward in life, improving myself and my skills preparing for the next couple years. I do hope one day I can love but for now they all seem to end the same way, but then again I've never dated

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    1 comments · 95 views
Jan
31st
2018

Updates: 1/31/18 · 11:29pm Jan 31st, 2018

At last January is finally over! Ive always felt extremely depressed during those months (December and January), especially now with current events, but it's ending very soon and I can finally feel some hope once again. But anyways, updates! Hey I guess you could say it's finally time for New Years resolutions x3 (The short listed version is below if you scroll to the bottom, just in case you don't want to read all this crap.)

First of all id like to begin with what I have planned for 2018, honestly this is a bit late now to be planning out 2018, but January doesn't count as a month for me so hush. I am hoping to possibly complete "The White Pony", my longest and possibly best story on FimFic as of now, then im thinking of starting another one sometime soon, but we'll see how that goes. Other than that I have some non writing-wise goals, such as producing a full animation, or at least even starting a full animation this year as I haven't done a single full animation yet, just shorts. Then id also like to complete a ton of pieces by the end of 2018, pieces as in art. I believe Ive made maybe over 40 full pieces, not counting the tons of uncompleted ones! Though that is just a guess based off my artworks folder size. I believe I have improved quite a bit since I first started drawing ponies around March of 2017 or so. If you wanna see my art, most of my older ones should be on my deviant art (MLPNorthWinds) and if you scroll down my twitter (@MLP_NorthWinds). But anyways this year should be the best year yet, I have be struggling alot with motivation all year and I can slowly feel it return. I hope that by March I'll be as productive, or even more productive than I was last year. It's funny how new years dont exactly start for me until spring is here.

Overall my total happiness has been increasing and no im not making a stolen bike joke, but I feel as though as the weeks go by, the more content I can feel about myself and I also feel as though I can be fully happy again one day, though I don't suspect that to be anytime soon. That is completely fine with me as long as I do eventually feel better and that it goes by quickly. Actually all this began over a month ago now, I can't believe that much time has passed already, wow time really does go fast when you spend less time wishing for it to go faster and more time doing something. I will look back at this a month from now and feel the same way, isn't time amazing like that? But anyways I guess that's it for now, I know I have created any posts in a while, but I am doing mostly fine as of now.

Quick listed version of my goals that i plan to complete by the end of 2018 -
- Finish "The White Pony"
- Create/start at least one full animation
- Create and improve even more on art
- Possibly start another story
- Regain motivation

I hope that isn't too much that I am asking my future self to do, but I am sure he is able to do just that!

Report CocoaPone · 209 views · #January #2018 #Updates #Events
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