A New Challenge Game / My Review of Rarity and the Quest for the Legendary Spool of Thread · 12:35pm Jan 19th, 2018
Hello, brothers and sisters. I am Madness and welcome to my kingdom.
So, me and my best friend, Vertigo, have started a little writing challenge thing. Basically, we give each other a story idea and you have to write the story in 24 hours. Of course, the story must be a one-shot and the idea has to be doable as determined by the author. Aside from that, you can also add up to three extra challenges, which are things you have to work into the story. Me and Vertigo did our first challenge and this is how it went.
My challenge to Vertigo: A story about Rarity fighting 100 ninjas to claim a legendary spool of thread. Extra challenge: Rarity must fight a four-armed mime ninja.
His challenge to me: A story where Pinkie Pie is Replaced with The Babadook. Extra challenge: Starlight Glimmer must star in it.
We also decided to give each other full reviews of our respective stories. So, this is my review of Rarity and the Quest for the Legendary Spool of Thread. I highly recommend checking it out before reading the review. It's not a long story at all and it has a great twist in the end that will be spoiled in the review. So, go check it out. Anyway, without further ado, let's get this review started.
The frozen lands of the north are a place of many dangers. For Rarity, they are but a training ground. However, when the time comes for her to go for the treasure she has spent her entire life training to get, she must first pass through some of the most dangerous warriors to ever live: The One Hundred Dragons, a group of ninjas that have guarded the legendary spool of thread that once belonged to the great magus Lazarus the Wise.
I love how serious the description is.
Anyway, the story follows Rarity has she slices through The One Hundred. She dodges giant yetis and fights against fellow unicorns, werewolves, a dragon, a ratman, a lobster dude who I imagined as Larry the Lobster from Spongebob Squarepants, and of course, a four-armed mime ninja. I like how there's a lot of variety in the foes. I imagined Rarity just taking them all on in one epic showdown and all of them being ponies. Instead, we get different species with different personalities, which I thought was cool. And the variety of enemies as well as the set up of looking through a dungeon makes sense when get to the twist.
On the downside, as the story goes on, it gets rather... boring. It's interesting and it got quite a few good laughs from me, but as it went one, it started to become tedious due to not having much else to it. I mean, given the concept, I guess that's to be expected. So, I suppose the problem was it was too long; being over 4000 words. If it had been shorter, it would have gotten boring. There was also several typos, too many to list.
As for Rarity herself... Well, I was disappointed. I mean, it's Rarity as a ninja/monk warrior! All the things she could have said! All the reactions she could have had! Instead, we get... nothing of note besides her saying 'awesome' without any hint of irony or anything. Come one, Vertigo, she's your favorite pony!
But then comes to twist in the end. There were countless signs looking me right in the face... I should have known. It's too good! Like, whatever downsides this story has, I feel it's worth it for the twist alone. The big twist: Rarity was actually playing an online RPG! I should have known! I mean, Vertigo plays RPGs every day! The setup of the fic just screamed it! But I didn't know! Well freaking done!
That being said, I do think it was an odd decision to make them be ponies, at least in regard to the twist. I mean, it's an RPG; that's when you make it Equestria Girls, I think. It's a bit jarring to have ponies be the one's playing it...... Then again, this is Vertigo, so... 
In conclusion, I liked the story. It was fun for the most part, got a few good laughs out of me, and had a great twist. It has many porblems and was rather disappointing, but I still enjoyed it. So, be sure to show Verty some love.
Vertigo is also doing his review on Pinkie Pie is Replaced by The Babadook, which you can see on the right. I actually watched The Babadook for the first time before writing the story. So, there's that. Hope you all have a good day and I will leave you with a GIF of Sunny and Sonata being cute.
Aaaand that's all for now. God bless you, bye bye.
