No sleep for the wicked · 11:31am Jul 11th, 2017
I am not a technical reader.
By that I mean that I do not consume the manuals. The ancient tapestries and the new-fangled, electronically charged, tablets of this age. The ones that seek to inform you of where the venerated comma is supposed to be placed, the mighty form and act is supposed to stand and recite its part, how the word should bend like a ballet dancer after it follows this burly gentleman.
The other ones, the mystical ones are also strange to me. The works that remove the mysteries of the literary works. The thesis on the unknown heroic character, the definition of the act of threes, the origins of stories and the roots they have sprouted. These are almost completely unknown waters to me. Almost, but not exactly. I know enough that I can press a stamp there, one that leaves a tracing of a scaled beast and the title beneath it;
Here be dragons.
I may not have swam these salty, dangerous waters, but I have taken a glance or two down the dark horizon. And truly, this sea could be too deep and vast for me or for anyone. Who’s to tell me I won’t drown in it, my coast vanished, and the joy I feel as I explore the unknown crushed by a million metric tons of bitter seawater?
This analogy has been pushed far enough. Time to lay it aside and take up another. Or explain myself, at last. That may be good as well.
I have seen little, read little, and perhaps thought little, but I believe I know this. That the ancient mammoth of centuries ago, as far ago as we have to replace the letters after the date to make sense of the time, the massive beast called man, is no different than the shambling beast of today. It may have shed its fur, it may have learned a new trick or two, but it’s still the same.
Still entertained by the same old stories. Still assembling in cliques and teams, whether be political, national, or sportsing. Perhaps all of them are sportsing, as much as this made-up word may annoy you. After all, in all these debates, encounters, and fights, the objective is to score points against the other. Trying to score more points than that other tribe, then that other country. Trying to gain higher numbers than this race, than this sex, than this gender, than this affiliation. The blues are still raging against the reds in Rome. The singers still sing of living only once in Ancient Greece. Homer still recites the hero’s struggle to reach his destination.
And it is so easy to see back and see it all being like this, is it not? To see the darkness reign, and misery sing? To point at the distant storm clouds and proclaim they shall come for us again, a torrent of pain and hate of our own making? To be the prophet that shall be proven right when he shouts that rocks shall fall and water shall pour downhill?
The darkness of man. The evil within. The sins that our kind has committed. It is so easy to point at them and say; This happens, this always happened, and this shall always happen. It is inescapable and it will always be true. I know this, I tell this, and by telling it and accepting it I prove my wisdom. By hating on me and you I prove my superiority. By turning my back on all of us I prove my superiority. By rejecting mankind while still drinking deeply of its benefits I prove my hypocrisy.
I am talking of course about the vogue that has ran across all time; to claim the darkness eternal.
It is so easy to do.
And I claim it false.
Why? Why do I do that? Where do I turn to find my reasons to do so, to show you why? That’s easy. I do it by pointing where it all begins of course.
I point at stories.
The hero wins. The light struggles but it never fades. The villains fall, the Silmarils return to the earth, the sea, and the sky, and Morgoth is thrown out the gates of time. Ulysses returns home and reigns again. Pinocchio becomes a real boy, Dorothy returns to Kansas, and the turtle wins the race. Spider-man has saved the big apple once more, Optimus Prime fights for the freedom of all sentient beings, and Zeus brings down the Titans, burying them in their prison in Tartarus.
If stories are the human identity, then why does this happen? Is it solemn hope, a poor, barely functioning attempt to hold ourselves afloat in this haunted space? But if that is so… Why then does everything seems to have followed suit in real life?
If evil wins, then why did Hitler lose? Why do diseases that ravaged us survive in samples only due to, not mercy, but scientific curiosity? Why do I not have a slave of my own, why am I not able to beat my female family if I want to, why am I stopped from living a crime-filled life by the guards of society?
And I can almost hear so many scoff. This still happens, they say. This hasn’t stopped. How can you say that the good guys have won when they obviously haven’t?
Well, then. How can you say that we have reached the end of these particular stories? Perhaps this Arioch has not been slain yet, but we know his time comes. It is how stories go after all.
You read these words on a screen. A monitor or a cellphone. Have you ever had a burned out pixel? It is so obvious, isn’t it? Or a smudgy fingerprint. They scream at you. One lonely dot among millions. It screams, and your eyes sees nothing but that dot.
Perhaps the world shines. Perhaps each act of charity and goodness adds to its light. Every time a mother croons with love to her child, the white brightens. Every time you see a friend in a mood and you sit silently in support next to him, the glow increases. If you could see it with the eyes of a god, the world might have been a pearl.
And perhaps, just perhaps, that is why the darkness shows so clearly against that glorious light. Perhaps some have been fooled by this shadow theater. Oh, the dark is there, the shadow is cast, but it’s not encompassing, and the book has not finished yet. But the ending will come. All the heroes have to do is keep struggling, and not give up.
And then this Dark Lord shall fall as well, as did all the rest.
Here I stand and regret.
Choices done in jest.
I should have done my rest.
Not prose and be a pest.
Not a single hour of sleep. I am quite certain that lack of sleep gets me a little high. Hmmm….
So, where's long winded you on Discord? I don't like that you.
4598398
You don't like long winded me or you don't like normal me? Define, man. Define!
Also, the long winded me is there just fine. It's just you bloody munchkins that won't let me put a word in!!! The nutcracker's curse on all of you!!!!!
4598406
The long winded and MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! But good news Crim! I fixed a bunch of stuff!
4598407
Yeah, I'll take a look at it after I curl on my bed and dream of being a G1 Transformer for a few hours. I also thought you might enjoy knowing that I just wrote a single scene of a future chapter for one of my stories, and that single scene has a bigger word count (e-penis) than your chapters. You know, just in case you needed one more reason to hate long winded me and my massive sub sandwich :D
Hungh!
4598409
Hah! Good one on yah for getting something done! Now sleep well will yah?
That moment when your tired mind forgets you're reading a blog and not the next chapter.
4598437
Well, as long as you got some measure of enjoyment, then it was a win, for both you and I.
...Get some rest, Crimmar.
And regarding your message, it is my belief that people are motivated less by morality, some everlasting battle between the forces of good and evil, and more by making their mark in the world. A lot of us focus on ourselves and our own problems before thinking of others, and there is nothing wrong with that. Know that by saying this, I am not insinuating that we as a race lack basic empathy.
We are gluttonous creatures. We are fallible creatures. We are mortal. Intelligence does not change Man's nature, Man's primal fear of fading to oblivion.
4598790
Yes, I feel vastly better now. I've been on, at best, 4 hours of sleep per day for a week, and then having a sleepless one on top nearly crushed me. But I have to say, it did wonders for my prose. I wonder if this is what they mean by saying you have to suffer for your art?
As far as the "message" goes... The motivation of each is their own, and often it is personal. This is fine. Sam didn't go to Mount Doom to protect the world, he did so only because he wanted to be there for his friend. It didn't make what he did any less.
And these flaws you enumarate are there, and so much more than that paltry list. But people rise over them, so very often, and out of sight. You might have dozens, or hundreds of times in your life where you failed, where you did the wrong thing, chose badly. But what I meant was...
That ALL the rest, every single one was where you didn't. But its easier to point at a dark cloud than a clear sky.
It's too goddamn early for this, but I read it. Go get sleep, Crimmar.
4599456
You're not my mom!
Wanted to ask how goes the job hunt?
4602919
Nailed it. Got one, it pays... well, it pays, but I have the standard benefits at least, and I am given the full legal rights as a worker that I'm owed, read "not abused" like I was in my previous one.
On the relatively minus side is that this job requires me to learn a lot of stuff. I don't mean learn how to do my job. I mean that my job is to learn stuff. I learned, from scratch and in one month, HTML, CSS, JOOMLA, MOODLE, and I need to learn a whole lot other things, from Java to PHP, and that is just for starters. I also need to get certifications on EVERYTHING, including things I know but I'm not certified for, and when that's done I need to do that even more.
Heck, I am already making a site after a single month. A MONTH! When I knew crap about how! You can see how even if it is quite a fun job (love learning stuff) it's a real time sinker. Oh, and all that learning is done by myself. I'm not actually taught by anyone.
Still, I love this so far.
4602963
Sounds cool. Im more of a physical labor job kinda guy. I work seasonally, for farmers and different mills. So still writing occasionally to keep your writer's whistle wet. Also whats the weather like in Greece.
4602972
Sunny. No really, it's freaking hot, and I can't take the heat. It reaches about 35c (95F) and it can easily get up to 40c (104F). Remember me as I was, not a molten puddle of wax. I hope you at least can get some relief from the sun's scathing kiss.
I can do physical labor, and I used to before I started working as a graphic designer, for a short time at least. But you gotta play things up to your talents, and I am better in creative projects and adapting. Also, I'm not really fit to work in certain workplaces where you have to move around a lot. I'm kinda like Derpy in a big form. I break things. Sturdy things.
4602985
Nah dude i live in California USA, i live in the central valley area, its 100° plus here, while LA/Hollywood is high 80's to low 90's. I cant stand a desk job, i get stir crazy, i gotta move or i get up to higjinks, like making a giant cardboard castle out of xtra boxes at work. Not kiding got so board i did that, then when i work at the tomato canary, we sometimes bowl with the empty cans. Tech wise, i suck and am about 5 years behind. I know how to run windows 98 perfectly, but like windows 99 and up i suck at. Now onto a topic idea ive had for awhile, can you habe my character Steel edge from lunar guardian stay on with lunas ne lunar guard, i think if u use his tactical knolege side he can learn moder language, and be a real assest to them, a mobile and stationary black smith/quarter master/tactician is a great boone. Also i kinda want to see if he can start a small harem with lile 3 mares in the guard including leaf stream. Hes got to rebuild his clan.
4602991
The character you presented had an interesting origin which got weaved seamlessly into the story... but most of his Quirks/Skills are too much. He is an every-man: need a general like Alexander the Great? Steel Edge can do that. Need a giant of a man—PONY that can kill you should there be need? SE is your guy. Need a MacGyver, turning whatever into a weapon? Behold MacEdgy! Need a Casanova? Booty-call "Steel Edge".
All these traits are impossible to be used by one character, unless he is called The Batman... He has been given merit as a blacksmith though, and his time will come. You ask for a lot, and that can't be delivered without changing the story to be about him, and it isn't. It's about the two people in the cover art.
Steel Edge won't be as impactful to the story nor as powerful and capable as you want him to be. Just be glad he is in the story.
4603313
Very well. Just remember its The Batpony in Equestria not The Batman. Lol.
I do gotta wonder, why in cannon Luna diddnt grow or age while imprisoned in/on the moon. She should have kept aging, at least to grow physically. When she came back in S1 she was twilicorn sized, so not very big but has a small groth spurt to get to her current size. Anybody ever elaborate on this, its been bugging me since the 1st nightmare night episode ( lunar eclipsed )?
4602991
Mate, I don't think your OC is the only one who needs to learn the modern language.
To be completely honest, I actually agree with this. Steel Edge has just been introduced and I can already tell he needs more love. And while he's at it, Steel Edge should replace everyone else in the Lunar Guard since he's perfect for every position. A veritable Swiss Army knife of a pony. Hell, have him replace Raegdan and Luna as the protagonist of the story; he's that interesting!
Here's a suggestion I offer to you: speak with Crimmar. I mean speak with him, not beg or question or anything of the sort, because what you're asking will in no uncertain terms ruin the story because of its intrusive and disrespectful disregard for the characters and the established material. In my experience, the guy doesn't bite. So instead of asking for ways to make your character impact the story in rather useless ways, you need to give him character.
The way I propose you do this is by giving him a few meaningful quotes or details that make him seem alive. He needs flaws (not the flaws where he is just so perfect that it hurts, because that's what I'm seeing), he needs contradictions, he needs life.
Steel Edge comes from antiquity, so he's going to struggle with many of the problems Luna had at the beginning of the story, including and not limited to adjusting to new times and traditions, grieving over the lost lives of his comrades, and feeling alone in a cold, unforgiving world. Let's add a few delicious toppings of PTSD as well, just to be safe.
A HAREM IS GOING TO BE THE LAST FUCKING THING ON THIS POOR GUY'S MIND! He needs closure, comfort, and a purpose; him seeking to "rebuild his clan" is a gross insult to his development! Considering his situation, this soulless way of thinking is callous and disturbing.
So, speak to Crimmar, adjust your character's quotes (not trying to toot my own horn, but look at Gobrend's quotes for an example of how they can flesh out a character) in a manner that they distinguish his quirks, his likes and dislikes, and his hidden traits, and I'm sure Crimmar will be more than happy to grant your character, who is already immensely important storywise, something more substantial than the status of an instrument.
Don't you try fucking with my girl Leaf Stream, pal, or you'll have to catch me outside. Howbowdah? She's an independent mare who don't need no Gary Stu! And it's not too much to ask of you to google a word if you're not sure of its spelling or use. I'm not trying to be a Grammar Nazi, aber mein Gott, dude.
tl;dr: Ravioli, ravioli, your character is cardboard-oli.
4604029
Ok ill admit my spelling sucks in some places, and some are accidents, im only online via cell phone, so my fingers sometimes mash buttons. I base my oc a bit on myself, i do know basic smithing, as well as offhand/dual weilding melee weapons, im larger than most people in my family just shy of 6ft, with a wide build.
Personally yes id ask these questions 1st.
1) how long have i been gone?
2) is my clan still alive?
3) is Luna ok?
4) did tge monster i fell in that hole with finally get destroyed?
5) can anypony teach me current equestrian language?
6) does anyone have food, im hungry after such a long time.
7) where the Tartaurus is my war axe (tomahawk)? I prefer a tomahawk to a sword, just because they are very versatile as a weapon and tool.
Catchphrases
1) I can fix anything as long as its not a steaming pile of slag.
2) Anything can be a weapon, because sometimes you just have to make do.
3) My tomahawk has a name, its hawky.
4) Steel smash.
5) some may say a wepon is only as good as the one who weilds it. In truth the weapon and weilder must be equal one and the same, if your weapon fails, then you failed first, for you should know your weapons imperfections so you can use it to your advantage, in order to trully be one in mind, body and soul.
Here is my oc's stats.
Name: Steel Edge
Race: Thestral / bat pony
Age: 22
Gender: Male
Weight: 222 pounds
Height : 6ft build like Big Mac just princess size
Fur: Gunmetal Grey
Mane/Tail: Iron Black
Cutie Mark:
morgandambrosio@gmail.com
Email me for the pic of the cutie mark.
Blue shield with a sword with a smithing hammer as the handle and a spear with a scythe blade for its handle crossing mid sheild with Thor's hammer crossing behind those 2.
Cutie Mark Talents.
A proficient weapons smith both in the forge and the work bench Steel hasn not only mastered every weapon known, but can fit any type of being with the perfect armour and weapon that suits them, he is a master tactician. While he is a proficient warrior he does try to settle things with talking first. If that doesn't work or isn't fit for the situation he will attack with all his might. Though known for his monstrous strength he is quite gental to his friends and allies.
Character: A colt born by Sunny Smithy and Night Wings Edge. He was born and raised in a small village in the frozen north. From a young age he took to the forge and weapons like a stallion possessed, even creating things others never would have thought of, such as automale prosthetics. Day and night he trained in both weapon smithing and martial skills.
Backstory:
One day Princess Luna visted his village to recruit soldiers for monster hunting. Steel elected to go and serve his princess. While exploring a cave Luna, Steel, and a dozen other ponies were attacked by monster worm like creatures as steel and luna fought side by side they were separated from the other ponies who perished by the monsters. In a last ditched effort luna tried to cast a time spell and a teleport spell, but as she was casting both she was knocked back by one of the monsters and the spell went haywire it engulfed luna and steel. Unknown to luna she had been flung free of the spell that was supposed to take her and steel 1 minute into the future outside of the castle of the 2 sisters. She was flung out of the spell vortex and landed in the castle's courtyard but Steel wasn't anywhere to be seen. He was lost to time.
Scene where Steel is found. This scene would take place after chapter 31. There is a massive influx of magic energy at the castle of the 2 sisters. When out of a vortex flys an unconscious Steel Edge. Luna sets out with her guard to find the sorce of the magical disturbance, upon arriving at the old castle Leaf Stream finds Steel and calls everyone to her location. From there luna orders that Steel is brought to canterlot to be medically treated.
From there you decide his story with some input.
Reason why he wants to serve: He swore the day he joined luna's crusade against monsters he would stay by her side as her knight till he dies.
Quirks/Skills/Random:
1) Smart but allows his size to fool his enwmy to think he is all brawn no brain when he is really a tactical genius. 1A) Bonus is he is very dense with muscle so it is hard to physicality move him.
2) Is very creative and can create anything given time to make working models and designs.
3) Very gentle for his size when he wants to be, but can rival a monster in brutality if pushed far enough.
4) Loyal and honest.
5) Capable of turning anything into a weapon to suit his needs. Ex: Can coat hooves in clouds and use them as electric punch glooves able to either stun or kill depending on his mood.
Wouldnt mind if he was a love interest for Leaf Stream. Just tginking her attitude might change if she was being courted by a stallion who could give her working automale wings.
4604029
I do agree i asked for him to be shipped too early.
Btw i like Gobrend's character, he has an interesting outlook on life.
Only real flaws in my character are basically being antisocial, and lack of a sense of humor, all he thinks is how to be the best soldier possible, so he lack a me organic side, and is more like a machine.
But i will heed ur advice and talk with crimmar.
4604044
I've already said what I had to on the matter; I don't need or want to see Steel Edge's copy-pasted stats on this post and neither does anyone else. If you wish to speak about your character, PM me. I'm more than willing to discuss it with you in depth.
4604046
Characters are defined not only by their qualities but also their flaws. In the case of your character you can easily see how the list of advantages he has eclipses his disadvantages by an impossible margin. Your latest post basically says that his flaw is that he acts like Batman (no humor and tries to be the best). That is not even a flaw, that's a character quirk.
The basic idea is that he's a blacksmith, and a very good one (though I'm in no way going to have him build cybernetics/automail). So the focus should go there and that should be his one greatest strength. After all, in order to become so good in one skill you have to dedicate yourself to it. Learning things to the grade that Batman does is even more ludicrous than Superman's powers. At least Superman has the excuse of alien biology.
Even this should be tempered a bit as he is now one thousand years behind on the advancement of blacksmithing, though this is something that could be considered his own personal arc. The interest in him would lie as a displaced character, very much like SirReal has proposed. Imegine on top of all that, struggling to catch up with even what he considered himself to be the best at, his foundations that he put his life on crumbled. Skills rarely have any impact on how good a character is.
Take Spiderman for instance. No one loves him because he's got spider powers. The reason that he is so great as a character is the struggles he faces as being piss-poor, down on his luck, and still trying to do his best for others in pure altruism after a hard-taught lesson. People love his quips, how he uses humor to hide his fear, his character. Not his powers.
Also, no offense, but your proposal of a harem made me scream for about 10 minutes.
SirReal has the right idea about the flow of his personal storyline, and I would love to go with that as it really ties in with the story as I would want it to go. Don't worry about his skills or his abilities. What you need is to give me more stuff of how his character is if you want to add more of a personal touch. How would he act and respond to certain things, how would he feel, in his own words, if he found out that the Thestrals are so low in numbers now, what if he learned of Nightmare Moon? Alternatively, you can let me do the best I can and shape his character from what I know and permit, because of my personal worldbuilding, of his history and events that have happened.
4604052
Ill let u build on him, cause if i heard that the human race was about to go extinct with only a few hundred of us left, id be lookin for a wife or 2 to try and repopulate. On the topic of luna/nightmare, id blame the solar zelots, and the nobles for being the true cause, if they assisted with the real terrors instead of allowing murderers, and rapists walk the streets instead of demanding their destruction id be angery. Celestia and her solar guard allowed twilight to get abducted, along with possibly hundredes of other foals, she proved she isnt competent as a ruler in this equestria. Not only that, but yeah ill admit my oc is a bit more defined and over characterized.
On batman though, he waant a real hero, that came from nothing. He was a rich kid who inherited his parents money and technology. He had money to pay for any endeavors he wished.
But gibe me an idea or 2 about what flaw may my character posses. I did base him mostly on myself. So maybe you can point it out.
Being anti social, and methodical is a flaw, it doesnt let you see a more creative out look on life.
4604061
An easy flaw would be by connecting him to his work. Let me describe him how I see him.
Let's make him inflexible and rigid, like a cold bar of steel. He has a way of doing things, going at them like a machine. His daily routine is so identical on a day per day basis that you could look at two different days of him going about and you wouldn't spot the difference. Stops at a certain time to eat, takes a break at the same time and always for the same length, his routine is like the blows of a blacksmith hammer, evenly spaced and calculated.
He is good at his craft because he has molded himself around his craft. He lives for it, and warped his whole life around it, until at the end he was nothing more that another tool in his forge.
Perhaps that is why he did decide to join Luna when the call was made. It would be the forceful break that he needed, one that he would have no choice but to follow in an everflowing, constantly changing pace if he was selected. And he was. And it lasted for two days.
Now, he has lost everything that he defined himself around. His clan is gone, and the thestrals have ammased all together into a paltry group, so far less than they were. He is unable to communicate with mostly everyone. He knows noone, only Princess Luna, and he was sent away from her without even speaking to him.
He finds out about Nightmare Moon, and he wonders if the fault for that might be linked to him. He knows nothing of what happened to his old, brief comrades, other than they all died shortly after. He has nothing. Even his vaunted skill has been surpassed, and there are new techniques, tools, and alloys that he never dreamed of.
He needs something to stand on. He (spoiler for future) has forcefully gone to Canterlot, demanding to serve Princess Luna as he was meant to do. He never sees her. She never speaks to him. But he is settled in the guard, and learns his craft anew from Cast Iron, quickly and methodically absorbing everything, ready to serve as a blacksmith at the very least, helping to craft the armors of the Lunar Guard.
He thinks nothing. He has his hammer, and his anvil, and he finally has something to grab on. It will do... for now. But cold steel can break on impact, and Steel Edge has cracks now. He has questions. But he also has his work. He could ask his questions... but then he might risk losing everything oncee more, even if all he has is so little now. Perhaps it is better to keep working on the anvl. Work and not ask questions. Just serve. And so he does.
The strikes of the hammer upon the anvil are uneven.
Okay, I don't know about you, but I was kinda taken in by writing that. I think I would love to write him like this.
Now, as for his abilities, I think I made them clear so far. Fighting wise... He is not that good. He knows how to wield a multitude of weapons, but that came more from wanting to know how to judge the balance, weight, and their strike. He is nowhere near proficient at them in a real fight. But he's big, and he's strong. (Think Raegdan for example. He sucks at wielding weapons as much.) He'd be antisocial through disinterest, not out of dislike of company. There is no time for joking around when in a room filled with searing heat, oils, and sharp edges.
Well, that's what I got so far. I need to work him in story to get a better sense of him. But to compare him to Cast Iron in the sense they are both blacksmiths, Cast Iron takes joy out of creation and enjoys the artistry inherent, for Steel Edge his work is as needed as breathing and he will have the best practical end result only.
4604098
Hes perfect i could cry, can you at least make him good enough in using a war hammer, or even just being like AJ with earth shattering kicks to his enemy. Other than that you remind me why i luv your stories.
4604098
I lnow its agaimst your last msg but i feel he should at least have one quality combat wise where he is deadly. If not i dont mind, some skill is better than none.
4604098
Though when this story ends, you should get it printed to hard copy and sell it.
4604104
Not having the combat skill doesn't mean he cannot have a fight or win it. And there's a vast difference from having none to having little skill. A little skill might be all you need. I'm still a little fuzzy, so I am not quite sure on how to handle that part yet, and its far away that I haven't needed to think too hard on it.
I do have a few ideas on how to use an original setting to retell this story, as well as the replacements for Luna and others (and who to cut or merge into one). Of course, that is quite far to the future if it ever happens. Let's finish up this first!
4604114
Pony on!