just gonna leave this here, · 9:44pm Feb 8th, 2017
Thought about my lifegoals and such. Boy, Did i have a bad lifegoal in mind.
So i am hoping to pass 12th grade, graduate, head to college, get a degree, find a job, and then live in a house, by myself. WIth no friends, no girl, no one. Just myself and stuff like that.
Sounds kinda miserable with lifegoals like that.
I wish i could head outside and socialize to make friends. But i just can't. I lack the confidence to go out and say hi and get to know people. I am too awkward to really talk to in real life, and i just don't feel any confidence or anything of the sort of being able to actually make any friends.
Hell, it's already hard as it is to make friends here on the interent nowadays. WIth fake accounts, people who could pretend to say things they've been through, but never been through it, Take your trust and break it, etc.
it's very hard to do things on the internet when there is so many things that can hurt a person.
This group may have more nice people then bad, but that doesn't mean everyone is safe and is able to live on in life without having any problems or roadblocks. It sucks being depressed, and having to go through it. But you just gotta go through it and live on. For thats what us humans do.
Fight the depression, let it sink in, and bring it right back out when you just can't hold it in anymore on that day. It's just a habit, and what us people do.
It's at least something i have to do. The only upside to my depression is that my birthday is in two months, and i'll be turning 19. April 11th i hope will be a good day for me. But who knows? It might just end up being my worst day ever if things dont go the way I hope.
Anyways, I'll stop bellyaching and telling my depression problems. very sorry for the long rant people. It just helps to get it off sometimes.
Im just hating that im 18, and am thinking of all these negative bad things so quickly. It's gonna suck. It's gonna be painful, but i gotta fight through it no matter the pain i feel.
>feels like shit
And yes
It is that bad
sorry if it's a lot
It's just what i needed to let out
yeah....
May you all have good days.
For what it's worth, if you were like your online self, I'd be your best friend in a heartbeat.
I'm so sorry about how you're feeling. *hugs*
I get you, I'm pretty antisocial myself. It sucks being alone.
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*hugs you all* it's gonna tkae a while beore i get better, but thanks for the comforting words.
4415217 You can count on us for a good spirit-lifter. Well, we'll try, anyway.
*hugs* I don't really have many friends left now...most have gone away. But people here are what keep me going. You all are all I really need in a social life. I want to help you my friend.