Speaking on Things. · 4:37pm Mar 30th, 2016
Yeah yeah, I've been pretty silent lately. I've been focused mostly on my transition from male to female and catching up on my gaming as of late, and I apologize for keeping quiet for so long. That said, I've got a couple of things to talk about.
Firstly, A Blouse Unbuttoned. Due to what's presently going on in my life, I'd prefer not to work on this story. On top of it being tangentially close to home, for me to work on this now would probably just come off as me using the story as a soapbox, and that is something I simply don't want to do as a writer. Until I'm comfortable with the story again, it's on hiatus. I know the story is almost two years old now and has almost reached the ending, but I simply am not comfortable right now.
Secondly, as a number of people have no doubt noticed, A Dance With Vengeance has been marked cancelled. To be honest, I've just lost interest in that whole 'displaced' idea. The idea of working with and possibly around other users just isn't for me, and there's a certain amount of politics to the everchanging 'meta' that I can't be bothered to keep track of. Even if I rewrote it to not be a 'displaced' story, it has been so long since I even thought about the story that it's simply lost the appeal to me. Not particularly a fan of rewriting things if I don't have to, y'know?
Now, a bit of bad news. I may or may not be getting kicked out at the end of April. As you're probably aware by now—I'm not going to make a sarcastic comment about paying attention if you aren't—I'm transgender, and have been dealing with gender dysphoria for the better part of thirteen years. Gender dysphoria is often accompanied by depression, which I do experience quite a lot. Depression can make people irritable and indolent. The latter has been getting me into issues with my family for some time, as it's been keeping me from motivating to keep the house clean—after all, why bother when people just keep leaving stuff all over the counters and there will be a whole dog worth of hair on the floor again by the time I'm done vacuuming? The Friday before last, I came back from my appointment at the sexual health clinic that's been helping me with my transition and my mother was incredibly frustrated. She was cleaning in the kitchen and was struggling with draining the sink that has clogging issues [inert garbage disposal left by previous home owners]. I told her to let me take care of that, and she basically told me to fuck off, that apparently if she wanted things done right, she had to do it herself, and told me to find a new place to live by the end of April. Now, some of that was probably the frustration [even though she rarely cleans up after herself to begin with], but I'm genuinely scared to ask whether she was actually serious or just lashing out, because if her answer is yes, there is literally no way I can find a new place to live inside of a month and be able to fucking pay because I am fucking unemployed. I have zero work experience, zero contacts, and nobody else to fucking turn to. She damn well knows all that, and she still fucking said it. Emotionally abusive and depression intensifying event or what?
There is some light out there for all of you, though. I've been working on a new story over the last few weeks. It features a very familiar character that I retired a while back. Got the prologue and first chapter finished, and have an old friend checking it out right now.
Hope everything works out for you, it doesn't sound like a particularly nice situation youre in right now
I hope you'll find a resolution soon.:)
If there is anything you need to talk to someone about, I am just starting on my journey to womanhood. I am only a message away and I know that I am a stranger but sometimes someone to vent everything to can be very helpful
She's alive!
Yeah... I haven't talked to you in far too long. I moved, had to wait for internet, now my friends (who I live with) are more of a distraction, someone bought a Wii, more Ponyfinder and D&D than I can shake a stick at... Excuses, excuses, I know. I really need to get better at budgeting my time.
Everything else aside, is the transition going well?
And in regards to the job situation, have you considered looking at entry level positions with your province? Sure, something like running toll booths or holding construction site traffic signs isn't very glamorous, but it gets your foot in the door and, if your provinces are anything like our states, then the benefits packages should be pretty good. It would at least be something and should placate the parental units.
3837090 My problem is finding entry level stuff that will A) be accessible to someone who does not drive, and B) not completely fucking ignore me because no experience, no references = no job.
It is terrible when family gives you grief. I hope for your sake, things straighten out for you, be safe.
If you live close to me I can offer a couch to sleep on while you look, not much but rent's not a big deal for me since VA disability covers it and I work full time.
Holy hell, I feel less alone now. I didn't even realize you were going through transition, I assumed you were female from the start.
Wow. I could have felt like such a bitch.
Hopefully everything works out, if you need any help, I'm willing to help any way I can.
You shouldn't feel pressured to write your stories, your fans have stuck around this long because we are willing to wait!
Just out of curiosity... what is your age and how long... or rather what gender therapy... have you been through so far? I am in Minneapolis and have a 34 year old friend who lives very nearby to me who has been transitioning from MtF with I think 6mg estradiol and 200mg spironolactone for about 6 months I think... always looking for insight into what others have experienced.
3840281 I'm 25, I've been out for about three months, been on 100mg spiro for about two months.